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Helping little sister with lady problems

  • 24-09-2021 11:17am
    Registered Users Posts: 1,084 ✭✭✭


    I have a little sister whose mother has passed away. Her dad is a religious zealot. She is 16 years old.

    She is having some problems down below that basically doesn't allow her to get anything inside her, from tampons to fingers.

    Can i get some advice on course of action? Is there any legal issues with me bringing her to the gynecologist? Do i book a regular doctor first and get a referral? and is it possible to hide all this from her dad?

    He is a bit crazy into religion, apocalypse incoming sort. Would love nothing more than his daughter to never have anything happen down there.

    However its starting to cause alot of emotional problems for my sister which i think will lead to personality/social issues in the near future. Its on her mind all the time, and she is terrified to go near boys incase shes 'found out'.. so anxiety is growing pretty fast and manifesting in unhealthy ways.

    Can anyone point me to a service also where i book this sort of thing? We are in dublin, private is completely fine too. Just anything that helps her feel ok again. Is it ok that i show up with her? I feel a little awkward about it but im trying to ignore that silliness.


  • Registered Users Posts: 991 ✭✭✭Baybay

    Good that she has someone to turn to. I think first stop is her GP. It may be something solvable in the practice but if not, the gp should be able to refer her to the appropriate consultant. Either way, it should help put her mind at rest. Perhaps a female gp would also be a good thing, if for nothing else than to have female input. With regard to you attending with her, I don’t know what’s current practice with Covid so maybe not. Otherwise, I believe it’s up to her to decide.

  • Registered Users Posts: 13,056 ✭✭✭✭Dial Hard

    GP and if she's not comfortable going to them for any reason, a Well Woman clinic. In fact, a WW clinic might be best overall as they specialise in this sort of thing, whereas the GP mightn't necessarily.

  • Registered Users Posts: 9,889 ✭✭✭Caranica

    Yes, I was going to suggest well woman clinic too. I'm lucky, I have an amazing GP but lots of women don't. I've gone to the ww clinic a few times (before I found my GP) and they were brilliant, sensitive and understanding.

  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,645 Mod ✭✭✭✭Faith

    Is there any legal issues with me bringing her to the gynecologist? 

    Hi OP, fair play for stepping up to help. In Ireland, persons aged 16 and over can consent to surgical, medical and dental procedures without parental consent, so there should be no legal issues. See here for further info, but the relevant bit is

    In general, children aged 16 or over may themselves give consent to surgical, medical or dental procedures, without requiring the consent of their parents or guardians. This is provided for in the Non-Fatal Offences Against the Person Act 1997.

  • Registered Users Posts: 211 ✭✭SunnySundays

    I would also recommend a well woman clinic.

    She doesn't need a GP referral and can just book online.

    They specialise in this and may be more help that her gp. They can also refer her to a gynaecologist if they consider it necessary.

    I can only speak for the one in Ballsbridge but I found the staff there were knowledgeable, professional and extremely compassionate.

    You could probably go with her and wait in the waiting room of she wants but as a 16 year old girl she is probably very sensitive on this so be guided by her on terms of the level of support she wants.

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  • Registered Users Posts: 5,264 ✭✭✭Princess Calla

    Another well woman vote here.....I used the one off o Connell street when I started to become "active" and they were lovely.

    Fair play to having such a good relationship with your sister. She is very lucky to have you.

  • Registered Users Posts: 1,084 ✭✭✭manonboard

    Thanks alot everyone for the help. Ill book an appointment with the WW clinic. Much appreciated and thanks for the calming influence.