Seperation looming - where do i turn?

imme62

Hi, i wonder if anyone might be able to advise me, as my world has just turned upside down and i really dont know where to turn. Husband has just announced he wants out of the marriage. We have 3 childen one still at school and the other 2 in college. We have a mortgage with about €20,000 equity in our home, and no savings. I have cancer and cannot work and am currently on illness benefit. Ive done some googling which i think shows that myself and the children could remain in family home til youngest finishes college, but i dont see that as an option as we couldnt pay the mortgage, and the running costs would be too much for me. Very worried how we will survive... What benefits would i be able to claim, and would we be given social housing if i leave the family home? Thanks for any advice its all very overwhelming right now.

[Deleted User]

I think your husband must still pay the mortgage even if he leaves. Also, even if he doesn't pay it, people don't get thrown from their house even if not being paid, in Ireland.

Dempo1

OP, first thing is absolutely not to panic. Your husband regardless of his intentions can not avoid his responsibilities and assuming mortgage in joint names he remains, along with you, liable for its discharge.

You have a host of issues that will need professional advice and as a first step I would advise seeing a solicitor urgently, they will advise on the legal aspects of seperation and joint obligations and maintenance issues.

Secondly, you mention your on illness benefit, this is a short term payment and given your condition, I would speak urgently to your GP with the view to applying for disability allowance, whilst means tested it's a more long term payment. It's a long process so the sooner you get started the better, it's likely you'll be applying as a seperated person for means testing purposes.

You don't mention what your husbands intentions are re your family home, mortgage etc. Whilst you have dependent children you will not be forced to sell home but I think at some stage you may need to speak to Mabs regarding budgeting, general financial planning etc. If and when either house is sold or you agree to take it on, years will have gone by. Mabs may be able to achieve a reduced or interest only payment option with mortgage provider in the interim.

Speak to trustee friend's, family for support but it's extremely important to get legal advice first and do not worry about your home. Crucially however, if it's a case you alone maintain house, costs etc, document everything and save details of all any payments made by you, this will be important in relation to a finalised financial settlement with your husband.

Awful situation to be in but there are many support organisations available to you and also citizens information are a brilliant resource for advice and information. I wish you well