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Difficult Squirrel Kill

  • 08-12-2020 11:29pm
    #1
    Roger Mellie Man on the Telly
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,102 ✭✭✭


    My dog disabled a squirrel. It had puncture wounds, but was still breathing. I lifted a nearby spade but found it very difficult to strike a blow. I suppose I lacked that killer instinct.

    I finally used the spade's edge in an attempt to decapitate the creature, however this was unsuccessful and presumably the reason why I perpetrated a rather horrifically sustained and frenzied attack.

    Is there a proven methodology for destroying a squirrel?


Comments

  • #2
    Stevieluvsye
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,907 ✭✭✭Stevieluvsye


    What the........


  • #3
    Muppet Man
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,674 ✭✭✭Muppet Man


    A 44 magnum would probably do it.


  • #4
    mobby
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,174 ✭✭✭mobby


    Bucket of water, fill to top, drop in said squirrel. leave for 5mins.

    Have done it with rats.


  • #5
    gooseygander
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 317 ✭✭gooseygander


    Please tell me it was a grey one and not a declining red one ?


  • #6
    igCorcaigh
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators Posts: 11,904 Mod ✭✭✭✭igCorcaigh


    Some vegans, even, are happy to eat roadkill, as the hapless creature isn't killed deliberately.
    Just sayin'.


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  • #7
    Princess Consuela Bananahammock
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 33,754 ✭✭✭✭Princess Consuela Bananahammock


    A drunk squirrel goes into a bar, climbs up on the counter, falls over twice and staggers towards the barman. Barman asks if he's ok.
    "No - I was here earlier.... Lost my keys."
    "I don't have them."
    "****," says the squirrel. "I'm.... locked outta me tree...."

    Everything I don't like is either woke or fascist - possibly both - pick one.



  • #8
    igCorcaigh
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators Posts: 11,904 Mod ✭✭✭✭igCorcaigh


    Roger Mellie Man on the Telly wrote: »
    Is there a proven methodology for destroying a squirrel?

    If there hasn't been a PhD done on it I'd be shocked.


  • #9
    Princess Consuela Bananahammock
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 33,754 ✭✭✭✭Princess Consuela Bananahammock


    igCorcaigh wrote: »
    Some vegans, even, are happy to eat roadkill, as the hapless creature isn't killed deliberately.
    Just sayin'.

    Nope. Have to get consent first, apparently.

    Everything I don't like is either woke or fascist - possibly both - pick one.



  • #10
    Ted_YNWA
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 71,802 ✭✭✭✭Ted_YNWA


    No, on every level


This discussion has been closed.
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