Are Fathers' Day and Mothers' Day rubbish holidays?

Hairy Japanese BASTARDS!

People feel pressured to buy a card and gift on those days. Myself included, even though I already regularly treat my mam to wine and flowers and my dad to a betting voucher and sweets throughout the year at random days.

I, and a lot of other people already look after and treat my parents because I'm not a Jewish Dutchman from Cavan.

Why are we pressured by card companies to buy tat and tacky cards?

gogo

Hairy Japanese BASTARDS! wrote: »

People feel pressured to buy a card and gift on those days. Myself included, even though I already regularly treat my mam to wine and flowers and my dad to a betting voucher and sweets throughout the year at random days.

I, and a lot of other people already look after and treat my parents because I'm not a Jewish Dutchman from Cavan.

Why are we pressured by card companies to buy tat and tacky cards?

I think if people feel under pressure to buy a card for their parents for one day of the year.... they need to take a look at themselves

unhappys10

Pure money racket.
I literally just said to my wife it's a load of crap. Birthdays fair enough but these makey uppy ones like mothers and fathers day, load of boll0x.
She insists though...time to find a new wife I suppose!

gogo

gogo wrote: »

I think if people feel under pressure to buy a card for their parents for one day of the year.... they need to take a look at themselves

Gestures of affection really don't need to be signposted. Birthdays are a day of celebration, other than that spontaneous gifts are readily appreciated by my folks.

Cal4567

Yes, along with Valentines Day and look at how Halloween has been pushed the last 20 years or so. People lap all this up. Birthdays, Christmas and wedding anniversaries only please.

looksee

Mothering Sunday was an old religious tradition going back some 400+ years, but the mother referred to was the Church, it was, apparently, a mark of respect in which people went back to their home church to observe the occasion. This of course usually meant they were going to their home so visiting the family/parents would be part of it and it seems that gradually the reference was transferred to their mother.

The sentimental Victorians kept this up, but it all fell out of favour around the start of the 20th century when two things happened more or less simultaneously. An English woman (can't remember any of the names but its all google-able) tried to bring the celebration back in honour of mothers, and an American woman did something similar but with a more commercial bent. It was from this that the whole business of readymade cards stemmed.

Father's day also had religious connections relating to St Joseph, but his 'day' is in March so its not clear why the June date was chosen, but it is likely also a commercial thing.

Whether they are 'rubbish' events depends to a large extent on you feelings about your parents and your creativity in avoiding readymade cards. Unless of course you have a parent that expects an ornate, purchased card Be hard to break the mould for most people now, but you can help get away from the commercial aspect by doing home-made cards, gifts and greetings. It is after all, the thought that counts.

2Mad2BeMad

unhappys10 wrote: »

Pure money racket.
I literally just said to my wife it's a load of crap. Birthdays fair enough but these makey uppy ones like mothers and fathers day, load of boll0x.
She insists though...time to find a new wife I suppose!

Yup without a doubt the 2 most made up bull **** days a year. Designed to pressure people into spending money.
Every day is mother's and fathers day if you are there for your kids
We don't need a ****ing reminder once a year marked with terrible cringy cards and ****ty gifts (yes I got a plug in charger for my car that I don't need :P)

Edit: I'll swap someone for a pair of socks

gogo

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Gestures of affection really don't need to be signposted. Birthdays are a day of celebration, other than that spontaneous gifts are readily appreciated by my folks.

It a sad state of affairs but they do need to be signposted for a lot of people, there a lot of people who don’t do spontaneous gifts for their parents, especially when your off at college etc, how many older people do you think are waiting for this to roll around so they can see the kids who haven’t called in a few weeks/months because there busy.
We always treat Mother’s Day and Father’s Day much like a birthday, tomorrow my husband will get a breakfast in bed, the kids will make him a gift and they normally write all over the cards with reasons why he is great and they love him. I love looking back over then from when they were really young. They really loved us because we bought them toys ;-)
You can celebrate your parents everyday of the year, of course you can, most don’t though. Both my parents died young, I’ll leave flowers out on a grave tomorrow for my dad, because he was an amazing dad, and I’ll remember that.

It’s one day of the year to celebrate someone doing a good job, it’s not necessary to spend money And fall for the hallmark crap, I don’t think it’s to hard to spend time telling a person this day all about you because your rocking parenthood. Hard to begrudge them that.

ShatterAlan

Valentine's day is the worst. Thank fcuk my gf doesn't give a toss about it but I had a gf before in the US and when I didn't take her out on Valentine's day she erupted calling me a bastard. Stupid cow.

Mad_maxx

load of rubbish , puts pressure on me to write mothers day cards on behalf of the kids

the beer revolu

Yes

Lewis_Benson

"Are Fathers' Day and Mothers' Day rubbish holidays?"

Yes.

Zebra3

The question in the thread title sparked off the scene in my head from the Simpsons when Love Day was created.

jaxxx

No more/less than Valentines/Christmas/everything else.

kippy

I wouldn't call it a holiday tbf.
It's just a day....
This year is the first without my own father and like most firsts since he passed it brings back a lot of memories over the years.
I've asked myself did I/we spend enough time with him since moving away and whether I showed him enough appreciation for what he did for his family when he was here.

As for the commercial aspect of the day, it's nice to mark it and do something appropriate for it. If the last few months have taught us anything it it to appreciate these excuses for an event, a meetup or to spend some time with those who mean so much to us.

Bobblehats

Everyday is a rubbish holiday

I see more and more 'Grandad' stuff appearing nowadays, too.


I don't mind the idea of the day, but it's not a big deal in our house. We get a card, few drinks, or a couple of euro for him and acknowledge it, but we don't do anything over the top for it.

AVFC.Stephen

Fathers day is a nice thought... cards well I have 4 kids and I got 1 card GO ME!. and that card was from the wife...

It's nice to spend time with the family as lots of folks get caught up in the rat race...

Dont like buying cards ? Make one...

Happy fathers day

arybvtcw0eolkf

They don't bother me really, but my kids (well into their twenties now) love to splash out and make a fuss on those days.

They're under no pressure to do so, I'm not demanding and a simple call or text would be enough.

I'm sure Fathers/Mothers Day and the like make more people happy than miserable so let'em be.

Happy Father's Day to all the daddies out there.

Capt'n Midnight

https://www.hotukdeals.com/deals/free-printable-tesco-value-cards-for-various-occasions-including-valentines-day-2878693




If you don't like Father's day

Kylta

There not really holidays as such, neither is Val day. They are basically hallmark days. But the blame for all these days rest with business. Before xmas is over, you have advertisements for new years sales, there only over and you have Vals day. And before thats over well some shops already have their easter eggs out, and this goes on year in year out.

Feisar

Wife is after making a tit of me. I done bugger all for Mother’s Day. She’s after getting me a wallet, a polo shirt, something that hasn’t arrived yet and a card with a pic of the wee man on it. Plus she got me a bottle of whiskey to bring over to my Dad. My Dad would be like myself, wouldn’t have any heed on stuff like that, more important to go to the bog with him or give him a hand doing something.

I like making a special effort on Fathers day (and Mothers day while I still had my mum). I appreciate him year-round but I like him knowing I think of him on Fathers Day. I've gotten him the same two gifts every year these last few years, and I know he looks forward to them. He's kept every pasta-covered crayon'ed card that my siblings and I ever made him.

kenmc

Sure it's not even a holiday!

Riddle101

Most holidays usually start off as some good will gesture but later corrupted and turned into a money grabbing thing. Mother's Day was created as a day dedicated to peace. Anna Jarvis was a peace activist who came up with Mother's Day. She actually resented the commercialization of the holiday so it shows that it was never intended to be a hallmark holiday. I can imagine same thing happened to Father's Day as well.

andekwarhola

The pressure is just in your head. My kids usually make me a homemade card or something and I love getting them. When they're older, it'd be nice to just get a call from them on the day but it's no biggie. I'd like to think I'll never to get the stage of curmudgeon where I think I care deeply about these things.

meeeeh

It's the one holiday I love. Not that I overly care about the sentimentality but kids make the cards themselves. It usually takes them three minutes and this year older one misspelled father and the younger one's read something like: "thanks for getting our dog, I love her. "

Potential-Monke

They're all madey uppey. All of them. Congratulations, you lived another year. Oh wow, you're married how many years? Let's celebrate something that we don't believe in, because presents!

It's taken a while, but I don't buy anyone anything and they don't buy me anything. Works out for both sides, no expectations. And it's not pressure to get something, it's just the absolute pain the hole it is. Trying to get something for mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, nephews, nieces, friends. How can you possibly give a good present each and every time that is different from the last? At what point should people stop and go, hang on, is this really necessary?

As for how I show my appreciation, I do it by telling them. By thanking them if they help me. By being there for a chat if needed. We don't need to celebrate each others minor milestones, and even if we do, we don't need to buy them something to prove it.

I've no problem if other people want to celebrate them, work away, just leave me out of it. It really is a relief not having to think about who to buy a card for and when and for what purpose. And where's the line? Is it just family only? Maybe close friends. But then where's the line at close? Will Mary be upset she's not in the close range but Imelda is? Do any of the men really care? Set no expectations, meet up for a chat when it suits, and just appreciate the company without having to rely on a physical object on a date set by marketing.

Still waters

They're not rubbish holidays, they're not holidays at all

Hangdogroad

I don't remember Mothers/Father's day being a thing in the 80s.

Gregor Samsa

Homemade cards from the kids, which I enjoy, other than that it's no different from any other Sunday, except I can put the guilt on them with "this is the way you treat me on Father's day?" when they give cheek or don't do what they're told.