Should I Be Helping Out at Home?

Kwestioning

I live in Dublin, working from my apartment right now like many others. My mother (66) lives alone in the countryside. I'm wondering should I stay with my mother to run errands so she does not need to be out risking exposure to the virus? Am I overthinking this? Would appreciate some thoughts. She has not requested any assistance and has no underlining conditions, although that safety net seems to be gradually changing from reports about the virus. Thanks

Victor

Does she have someone closer to her that can do those errands?

My Mam is 67,she is well able to look after herself, it's terrible that she is confined to the house, but it's very much preferable to her contracting the virus, possibly dying.
I would love to call to her, but I am a 'front line worker' who has to work. I come into contact with a lot of people everyday, which would put her at risk.
The local supermarket is delivering , so she doesn't need anything else. If she needs anything from chemist, they will deliver also.
It's very hard, but hopefully in a couple of months, it will be worth it.

If I could work from home, & was sure I could isolate with her.... I might do that.

Junkyard Tom

Kwestioning wrote: »

I'm wondering should I stay with my mother to run errands so she does not need to be out risking exposure to the virus?

Might be stating the obvious here, but it means you must isolate too (inasmuch as you can) or it's pointless.

_Whimsical_

Kwestioning wrote: »

I live in Dublin, working from my apartment right now like many others. My mother (66) lives alone in the countryside. I'm wondering should I stay with my mother to run errands so she does not need to be out risking exposure to the virus? Am I overthinking this? Would appreciate some thoughts. She has not requested any assistance and has no underlining conditions, although that safety net seems to be gradually changing from reports about the virus. Thanks

If you lived with her you might need to resign yourself to limiting your own movements very dramatically for her safety and in time as it spreads, completely.

If she's still going out would she be willing to stop if you were there or would be cling on to her independence regardless?

Its a really good and kind instinct. If she was unlucky with this virus its something you might always be grateful you did. It's impossible to know what the right answer here is.

ILoveYourVibes

I think you need professional advice on this. Ultimately its your and your mother's decisions.

There are certain things i would imagine you couldn't do for her if you were in isolation with her.

However similarly there are certain things you could do around the house or caring for her etc.

I think you need to establish which is putting her at less risk and base your decision on that. I can't inform you of which has the less risk so maybe others can.

But do ask a professional.

lucalux

Kwestioning wrote: »

I live in Dublin, working from my apartment right now like many others. My mother (66) lives alone in the countryside. I'm wondering should I stay with my mother to run errands so she does not need to be out risking exposure to the virus? Am I overthinking this? Would appreciate some thoughts. She has not requested any assistance and has no underlining conditions, although that safety net seems to be gradually changing from reports about the virus. Thanks

Can she organise to get her shopping delivered?
Tesco and Supervalu do rural deliveries in most areas afaik, but if you look up https://localsupport.ie/ they can do a shop from the other supermarkets Lidl/Aldi/Dunnes etc, if that's her preference.

As to pharmacies, they will usually deliver if they have notice etc, especially these days, or again, ask localsupport volunteers as above.

I wonder if asking her how she's getting on generally, and maybe then probing a bit more specifically as to her own level of worry, might be a way of gauging her own thoughts on it though?

She might be more or less worried than you think, but having an adult conversation with each other could be the most direct route to figuring out what your next move is.

As other posters have said, if you move down to be with her, your own movements will be curtailed, and every time you go out, you have the worry of you yourself bringing something back into the house? Sorry if that's a bit dark sounding!

She's young though, my own mam is just into her 60's, and she's only just been told to work from home which is great.
I'm pretty confident she's got enough cop on to be safe while out and about, but I still worry, it's natural.

See what she needs first, and how she feels, then work from there maybe.
She might be 100% OK with a few adjustments, and you can put your own mind at rest

makeandcreate

Rather than going to her - put as many plans in place to keep her protected and to keep her connected to the world.
I have booked my mum and MIL online shopping - slots are booking up 3 weeks in advance - so currently have shopping arriving on 2nd April and 14th April plus I registered them with the community support groups and gave them the numbers in case they need them. Organised 3 months of prescriptions. Ordered my mother bulbs and plants. And told them over and over not to be going out other than the garden.
Ordering books and mags to be sent in a month and an Easter package - videos and cards from the kids too.
It's tough but necessary - my mum said today for the first time she is realising how serious this all is.