If you could be any object for a day?

beejee

I've been thinking about this for years. What object would you choose to be for an entire day?

No matter what happens during the course of the day, you'll reappear back as normal the next day. Plenty of things to choose.

I'll get the ball rolling. I'd be a chocolate bar, just like in that film. Maybe something with a fancy filling like fondant. Anyway, I'd start the day off at the front of the chocolate section near the cash register, I'm thinking in the likes of a successful newsagent due to good footfall, not a big place because I wouldn't want the competition.

So, I'd be all chilled out and wrapped up, ready to go at any moment. I would be selective about customers, it must be said. If some mad looking yoke walked in I'd crease up my wrapper and then twist with a sudden jerk *like this* and roll myself out of sight behind a snickers or something. That being said, in order to properly roll I'd need to be the right shape chocolate bar, so a Toblerone is out (ever see a triangular wheel?), and a Bueno is too "flat". I reckon rolo's are ideal but then again I'm not mad about them, so I'll think about this more later.

Right, so in comes the right customer. Someone who obviously looks after their teeth with a cracking smile and legs up to her arse. Red lipstick, none of this "trying to be different" stuff. So, my wrapper is de-creased, I'm reflecting the sunlight just perfect to catch their attention by blasting their eyes and I've nudged the other chocolates to one side.

Anyway the rest should be self-explanatory.

If you could be any object for a day, what would it be, and why?

jaxxx

A stripper pole.

Assetbacked

I'd be a battery so I'd have something to keep me going until I turn back into me.

Always Tired

Rachel Riley's bicycle seat

Junkyard Tom

Elephant.

the concept of erotic regret

Andrew00

jaxxx wrote: »

A stripper pole.

Make that two of us!

Andrew00

Andrew00 wrote: »

Make that two of us!

in agreeing, ye are nevertheless....poles apart

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

The great wall of China.

Sardonicat

A stained glass window

branie2

A book

beejee

branie2 wrote: »

A book

So as you get thumbed and licked in bed?

Why, people, why?!

The great wall of China? Elephant? A disgruntled self-propelled brick? (okay, that last one makes sense)

Bobblehats

Objection your honour.

jaxxx

Forget my last suggestion:

Kate Upton's bra.

Mmm.

jaxxx

jaxxx wrote: »

Forget my last suggestion:

Kate Upton's bra.

Mmm.

ill be her hat

you give those two a lift and ill go on ahead

auspicious

A black hole.

Guy:Incognito

Always Tired wrote: »

Rachel Riley's bicycle seat

Rachel Rileys dildo.

Definitely not taking the chance it rains on the day and she doesn't go for a cycle.