Marriage Proposal

Strumms

Folks,

A cousin of mine has been dating a girl from Argentina for the last four and a half years. For the guts of the last couple of years she has been acting weird but he can’t see it. She has a good job, decent money but for the most part she is fairly adept at keeping her hands in her pockets... any dosh she makes that’s spare gets sent home and on a whim she’s in his ear to go on holiday on his dollar etc...she’ll pay for incidentals like shopping the odd time or lunch but it’s really an ‘odd time’. Us mates have tried to talk to him, Love is blind.

Problem we have is it’s obvious to her and to be fair anyone, he isn’t short of a few bob. Working in the IFSC, drives a BMW, three bedroom house, pool table the best of most things, he makes about 75-80000..

They don’t live together but she is dropping hints about the possibility of her moving in, she’s even brought up the idea of marriage about a year ago and I’m told is mithering him about it constantly. She’s even brought it into conversation casually when we’ve all been out. According to him it’s non stop and he’s becoming worried it’s a ruse to try and gain permanent residency (she has student visa -don’t ask) and or get at his cash... his question and ours too if he said yeah why not, drunkenly or any other way how would this leave him... there have been no exchanges of rings or anything official aside from WhatsApp conversations etc... how would this leave him, he’s paranoid about being sued !

ohnonotgmail

this is what you are looking for

https://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/birth_family_relationships/getting_married/legal_implications_of_a_broken_engagement.html

ldy4mxonucwsq6

ohnonotgmail wrote: »

this is what you are looking for

https://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/birth_family_relationships/getting_married/legal_implications_of_a_broken_engagement.html

Wow, I didn't realise this. The legal implications for a broken engagement aren't to be taken lightly.

Strumms

ohnonotgmail wrote: »

this is what you are looking for

https://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/birth_family_relationships/getting_married/legal_implications_of_a_broken_engagement.html

Thanks, going by that I wouldn’t see it like he has much to worry about.. I’ll send it on tomorrow reminding him not to get involved with mad gold diggers... stick to the Irish ladies too

4.5 year relationship? I’m not surprised she’s dropping hints to be honest. If he’s not interested then best thing is end it now- for both parties. Everything else you’ve said is somewhat immaterial - why string someone along?

Btw she’s a student so isn’t going to have same levels of disposable income as your friend. From a legal perspective if she hasn’t contributed to mortgage etc it doesn’t look like there will be much to sort out financially

Strumms

Deleted User wrote: »

4.5 year relationship? I’m not surprised she’s dropping hints to be honest. If he’s not interested then best thing is end it now- for both parties. Everything else you’ve said is somewhat immaterial - why string someone along?

Btw she’s a student so isn’t going to have same levels of disposable income as your friend. From a legal perspective if she hasn’t contributed to mortgage etc it doesn’t look like there will be much to sort out financially

I think he was considering but it but her behavior as relates to this... marriage/money and a particular issue with his sister and her (they don’t get on) and he’s taken ‘thinking time’... I’d be adding him to stop thinking time, get rid time...

Strumms

Strumms wrote: »

I think he was considering but it but her behavior as relates to this... marriage/money and a particular issue with his sister and her (they don’t get on) and he’s taken ‘thinking time’... I’d be adding him to stop thinking time, get rid time...

If someone is even half thinking that their current partner is taking advantage of them, it’s probably a sign all not well - interesting that he never asked her to move in- I think he’s smarter than you might give him credit for.

ldy4mxonucwsq6

Strumms wrote: »

Thanks, going by that I wouldn’t see it like he has much to worry about.. I’ll send it on tomorrow reminding him not to get involved with mad gold diggers... stick to the Irish ladies too

Plenty to worry about if he doesn't trust her motivations.

"disputes about property between a couple whose engagement has ended are treated in the same way as disputes between a married couple who are separating or divorcing"

bfa1509

He should tell her that the marriage won't happen unless she signs a prenup with his terms. Her reaction alone should reveal her intentions fairly quick.

mloc123

bfa1509 wrote: »

He should tell her that the marriage won't happen unless she signs a prenup with his terms. Her reaction alone should reveal her intentions fairly quick.

Ireland does not have prenups

bfa1509

mloc123 wrote: »

Ireland does not have prenups

Yes, but chances are she doesn't know this.

Caranica

If she's on a student visa that doesn't count for residency for citizenship. I'd have serious questions on how she's on a student visa for that length of time, and how she's earning decent money as you're only allowed work 20 hours per week on that visa.

El Tarangu

bfa1509 wrote: »

Yes, but chances are she doesn't know this.

outstanding move...

Mrs OBumble

bfa1509 wrote: »

Yes, but chances are she doesn't know this.

Chances are, she does and it's why she chose to study here.

OTOH, he's been stringing her along for 4+ years, but not living with her. so no worries about a property claim. I'd be guessing that the sex is good, but he's not blinded by it.

foxatron

Four and a half years, he'd want to be making a decision one way or the other at this stage. If shes a gold digger he should have got rid long before now.

nuac

Mod
This lad has a sister and a cousin advising on a very private matter!
Anyhow leaving open for any relevant legal discussion