Are looks the main thing in life?

Nikki Sixx

When it comes to jobs, partners and generally leading a fulfilled life, is being born good-looking the golden ticket? I presume that every man/woman gets the best looking partner they can muster using their own social standing and their own looks?

armaghlad

Nikki Sixx wrote: »

When it comes to jobs, partners and generally leading a fulfilled life, is being born good-looking the golden ticket? I presume that every man/woman gets the best looking partner they can muster using their own social standing and their own looks?

Definitely a massive advantage.

Nikki Sixx

I’d imagine there are a lot less depression issues in extremely good-looking people? Surely they don’t suffer from as many confidence issues either.

Franz Von Peppercorn II

Nikki Sixx wrote: »

I’d imagine there are a lot less depression issues in extremely good-looking people? Surely they don’t suffer from as many confidence issues either.

You never met one of my exes.

mickdw

Looks or money

Nikki Sixx

mickdw wrote: »

Looks or money

Looks I’m talking about. And looks can lead to money if you think about it: rich man with a hot wife. I’ve heard of the opposite too, this good looking guy who wasn’t particularly successful marrying a female doctor from a very well off family.

LuckyLloyd

I might have made similar musings in my late teens / early twenties but I’d completely disagree now. I think being born with a genetic condition or acquiring some manner of illness or debilitation probably makes things extremely difficult, and is an area around which huge inequality still exists within our society. But if you’re able bodied, interested and interesting all sorts of normal human appearance will allow you to achieve whatever you wish to achieve imo.

This is it

I'm extremely good looking and manically depressed..

SEPT 23 1989

Omackeral

No matter how good looking you think someone else's gf is, she's absolutely 100% melting her bloke's head to take out the bins every Tuesday.

Love is the main thing, sillies. Without it we all wither.

wakka12

Its incredibly advantageous and honestly I think your personality must have major short comings if you are not living a good life despite being really attractive

But I think a charming, bubbly, funny and intelligent and passionate personality can absolutely overcome average or below average looks and allow you a very fulfilled life and being very popular and well liked by people in general. Sad truth is though that usually ugly people will have been treated badly and it will have hindered the development of their personality, they may well have been able to overcome that but good looking people are the opposite, even if they are naturally very shy or not very intelligent or funny or have other personality issues people will make allowances because of their looks and encourage their personalities to flourish and overlook those issues because of their looks

kowloon

I'm not sure good looking men have quite as much advantage as good looking women, relatively speaking. The rich man good looking wife trope seems to be more common than the reverse, but maybe there just aren't as many wealthy women to balance that out.
I have heard good looking people complain about just being liked for their looks, but it's an issue I think most of us would be more than happy to experience.

branie2

For a lot of people

Ronan|Raven

Looks fade over time but a good personality only grows stronger.

Ilovemycharlie

Wisdom.

Gimme A Pound

Not the main thing in life - obviously health, income (not being loaded - just having enough to get by), family, relationships, friendship, shelter, education surely are... but looks can be the most important thing in certain contexts. And overall they do give an advantage.

Good looking people have an easier time gathering up and displaying confidence I suppose. But looks are far from the main thing.

Junkyard Tom

ILoveYourVibes

Ronan|Raven wrote: »

a good personality only grows stronger.

Marriage screws that up. I know people who have had the personality sucked right out of them.

And no looks are not it at all.

Mad_maxx

Nikki Sixx wrote: »

When it comes to jobs, partners and generally leading a fulfilled life, is being born good-looking the golden ticket? I presume that every man/woman gets the best looking partner they can muster using their own social standing and their own looks?

Depends where you are based, if Brad Pitt went to the local disco in ballygobackwards, he'd go home alone as his grandfather never played full back for the parish

In the city, I would say yes

Ave Sodalis

Nikki Sixx wrote:

I’d imagine there are a lot less depression issues in extremely good-looking people? Surely they don’t suffer from as many confidence issues either.

I would think the opposite. With good looking people who are aware of it, it often becomes a part of their identity. As a result, some become almost obsessive with keeping their looks because looks change so much. People who aren't as universally good looking find their identity though more stable means.

Day Lewin

Looks are an initial advantage only; once the personality comes forward, the gilt gets knocked off the gingerbread mighty fast.

@kowloon wrote
"I'm not sure good looking men have quite as much advantage as good looking women, relatively speaking. The rich man good looking wife trope seems to be more common than the reverse, but maybe there just aren't as many wealthy women to balance that out.
I have heard good looking people complain about just being liked for their looks, but it's an issue I think most of us would be more than happy to experience. "

Its easy enough to take a fancy to a pretty face when you first meet them: but some of those pretty people are absolutely poisonous - full of themselves, vain, self-important and entitled. And that pretty girl will certainly pull a guy before her plain friend does.

But women know full well that a handsome guy who is proud of his looks may well turn out to be a ruthless exploiter and serial messer: handsome is as handsome does, etc. Proceed with caution.

So no, looks are NOT the main thing is life: the main things are integrity, sincerity, generosity and respect. In both sexes.

Hannibal_Smith

There was a guy I worked with who was very good looking, modelled for a bit apparently. But oh my god was he a sap. He was a total tool. His looks carried him through though. He dressed well and people took what he said seriously and was given a portfolio to manage. It was only after he left the boss realised he'd been f*cking up big time.

In his head he's top dollar though :pac: He thinks he's amazing at his job and at life in general.

Infernal Racket

No matter how stunningly beautiful a woman may be, somewhere, some lad is fed up riding her

Mrcaramelchoc

No way.big knockers are.

paw patrol

Looks do matter but being good looking needs to be worked for and must be maintained kinda like a continuous education. It's an achievement in itself.

You can look great in your teens naturally (like general intelligence) but without exercise , healthy (ish) eating and dressing well you will look bad over time.
You aren't just hit with the good-looking card you have to maintain it.

Anybody can be decent looking with a good body (via exercise) and carry themselves well clothes/hair/make-up


excluding any extremes nobody is good looking without work.

So my theory is being good looking is an achievement similar to any qualification you can earn in university.

PokeHerKing

Hannibal_Smith wrote:

In his head he's top dollar though He thinks he's amazing at his job and at life in general.

This is the main thing you need in life. Especially in business. If you think you're the dogs bollox you'll succeed.

I'd still take being rediculously good looking over it but ignorance is bliss.

super_furry

Pure incel talk here.

Mad_maxx

Day Lewin wrote: »

Looks are an initial advantage only; once the personality comes forward, the gilt gets knocked off the gingerbread mighty fast.

@kowloon wrote
"I'm not sure good looking men have quite as much advantage as good looking women, relatively speaking. The rich man good looking wife trope seems to be more common than the reverse, but maybe there just aren't as many wealthy women to balance that out.
I have heard good looking people complain about just being liked for their looks, but it's an issue I think most of us would be more than happy to experience. "

Its easy enough to take a fancy to a pretty face when you first meet them: but some of those pretty people are absolutely poisonous - full of themselves, vain, self-important and entitled. And that pretty girl will certainly pull a guy before her plain friend does.

But women know full well that a handsome guy who is proud of his looks may well turn out to be a ruthless exploiter and serial messer: handsome is as handsome does, etc. Proceed with caution.

So no, looks are NOT the main thing is life: the main things are integrity, sincerity, generosity and respect. In both sexes.

The worst human I've ever known was also quite possibly the ugliest

ArchXStanton

It's definitely an advantage, I grew up with two relatively well known (one extremely well known) good looking girls, it was interesting to see how they marketed their looks in life from promoting clubs, modelling, dating celebs to achieve the lifestyles they lead, thing is they were a pair of dopes to talk to, I used to walk away thinking what a pretty sh*thead that I wished I never heard.

topper75

Omackeral wrote: »

No matter how good looking you think someone else's gf is, she's absolutely 100% melting her bloke's head to take out the bins every Tuesday.

Aye it may be hard to believe - but somebody, somewhere is absolutely sick of listening to her ****.

Andrewf20

I'd say confidence is more important than looks.

Gimme A Pound

Gerry G wrote: »

No matter how stunningly beautiful a woman may be, somewhere, some lad is fed up riding her

topper75 wrote: »

Aye it may be hard to believe - but somebody, somewhere is absolutely sick of listening to her ****.

Or maybe not. Many women are not awful people. :eek:

valoren

Andrewf20 wrote: »

I'd say confidence is more important than looks.

I've always loved the Austin Powers movies as the core running joke is that the main character is the antithesis of good looking. He is short, wears hideous glasses, has horrible teeth, is flabby with a worryingly hairy chest and presumably has a small mickey considering he wrote a book about his relationship with his "swedish made" penis enlarging pump.



Chris Hemsworth he is not. And yet in spite of all that against him, he is extremely successful with the ladies bedding beauties of all nationalities. So what gives? While it might be a joke there is a core learning lesson there and it's about confidence, self-esteem and self-belief. While the Liz Hurley character with her modern sensibilities is initially repulsed by Powers' looks and his "sh1ts n' giggles" attitude but over the course of the film she see's beyond the looks and see's those core traits of unflinching confidence in Powers. The film calls it his mojo. He's just an extremely self-assured man whose moral compass is firmly in the right place and whose happy-go-lucky "shall we shag now or shag later?" attitude actually is a breath of fresh air from the navel gazing, self-doubting men, no matter how subjectively good looking they are. It's a lesson for any man who thinks looks are all that matters.

Bigbagofcans

Ronan|Raven wrote: »

Looks fade over time but a good personality only grows stronger.

Not for everyone. I know a few people who age like a fine wine

super_furry

valoren wrote: »

I've always loved the Austin Powers movies as the core running joke is that the main character is the antithesis of good looking. He is short, wears hideous glasses, has horrible teeth, is flabby with a worryingly hairy chest and presumably has a small mickey considering he wrote a book about his relationship with his "swedish made" penis enlarging pump.

Chris Hemsworth he is not. And yet in spite of all that against him, he is extremely successful with the ladies bedding beauties of all nationalities. So what gives? While it might be a joke there is a core learning lesson there and it's about confidence, self-esteem and self-belief. While the Liz Hurley character with her modern sensibilities is initially repulsed by Powers' looks and his "sh1ts n' giggles" attitude but over the course of the film she see's beyond the looks and see's those core traits of unflinching confidence in Powers. The film calls it his mojo. He's just an extremely self-assured man whose moral compass is firmly in the right place and whose happy-go-lucky "shall we shag now or shag later?" attitude actually is a breath of fresh air from the navel gazing, self-doubting men, no matter how subjectively good looking they are. It's a lesson for any man who thinks looks are all that matters.

Honestly I think this is the most serious anyone has ever been about a series of films that have characters that include.... Felicity Shagwell, Robin Swallows, Ivana Humpalot, Alotta Fagina and of course Fook Me and Fook Yu.

Hamsterchops

Nikki Sixx wrote: »

Are looks the main thing in life?

No, obviously not.

joe40

I think it is a bit more that just good looking in the traditional sense.

I don't know how, but looks can also convey a personality type to a certain extent. (which may turn out to be false)

For example someone can look confident or friendly, or even appear aggressive just from their looks, but their real personality doesn't necessarily reflect that.

I don't know enough about the psychology of this but I have seen people make instant judgements about someone from an extremely brief interaction, I have done it myself. Looks feed into that initial judgement.

So I think if you look confident, or charismatic if is a great advantage in getting over that "first impression" stage.

anewme

Nikki Sixx wrote: »

I’d imagine there are a lot less depression issues in extremely good-looking people? Surely they don’t suffer from as many confidence issues either.

You'd be totally wrong there.

Look at all of the famous and stunningly beautiful people and exceptionally talented and rich people that have committed suicide. its a long list.

Depression is a condition that effects people irrespective of their circumstances.

How many people have said "sure what had he/she to be depressed about"

This is where people need to educate themselves a bit before making these sweeping comments.

Thelonious Monk

Ronan|Raven wrote: »

Looks fade over time but a good personality only grows stronger.

They don't really. You're still good looking for your age. Ugly people are still ugly no matter what age you are.

Grayson

Years ago I had a friend who said that if he had kids he would prefer them to be beautiful rather than smart. I thought it was horribly offensive but I have to admit now he had a point.

It's not that looks are everything but if you don't have them it's a lot of work. Good looking people do have advantages that others don't. Although for women it's probably a double edged sword. They will also get a lot of unwanted attention.

Grayson

Thelonious Monk wrote: »

They don't really. You're still good looking for your age. Ugly people are still ugly no matter what age you are.

With the exception of childhood. We've all known pretty children who look weird as adults (Macauley culkin anyone?). The opposite occurs too.

Then there's the fact that your body can be ravaged with age. Pregnancy in particular can take a toil on a woman's body. Men can lose their hair. And both genders can put on weight.

Ush1

Hope that your children are dumb and good-looking.

wakka12

Grayson wrote: »

With the exception of childhood. We've all known pretty children who look weird as adults (Macauley culkin anyone?). The opposite occurs too.

Then there's the fact that your body can be ravaged with age. Pregnancy in particular can take a toil on a woman's body. Men can lose their hair. And both genders can put on weight.

Yeh but ugly women get fatter and ugly men still lose their hair with age too, so they look worse again than good looking people of same age who suffered same effects of ageing

anewme

Thelonious Monk wrote: »

They don't really. You're still good looking for your age. Ugly people are still ugly no matter what age you are.

I agree and disagree with this.

But sometimes people grow into or out of their looks or "shine" at a particular time in their life.

I know a lot of the very good looking people in my school year have aged very badly, both men and women whereas some of the plainer people back then now look much more attractive than they did then.

A lot is down to health, lifestyle and those who have done better for themselves have the funds for grooming, clothes gyms etc, rather than those who are financially struggling and stressed and this goes a huge way towards keeping/maintaining looks.

Wibbs

super_furry wrote: »

Honestly I think this is the most serious anyone has ever been about a series of films that have characters that include.... Felicity Shagwell, Robin Swallows, Ivana Humpalot, Alotta Fagina and of course Fook Me and Fook Yu.

never mind that it's a fantasy, a story, makey uppey. If one was to believe Hollywood the average looking guy working in a cubicle ends up with [insert currently fashionable babe here] after she gets tired of the good looking rich bloke. Wish fulfilment, not reality. Reality is she'll end up with the rich good looking bloke 99% of the time. Just like the billionaire boss in Mills and Boon will much more likely toddle off with the "bikini bimbo" half his age rather than plain Ann from accounts(though Silicon Valley nerds can skew this. QV Zuckerberg of ArseBook).

Thelonious Monk wrote: »

They don't really. You're still good looking for your age. Ugly people are still ugly no matter what age you are.

Pretty much. That stuff is always trotted out on this subject. Oh you might be gorgeous at 20, but just wait... your looks will fade. It's always said with more than a hint of glee too. Again the reality is unless you pile on the fat, or otherwise wreck your health with bad lifestyle choices,(or, and more rarely build a better physique and lifestyle and improve your looks) if you're good looking/average/back of a bus at 20, you'll be good looking/average/back of a bus at 50.

Dial Hard

They're not the main thing in life by any stretch of the imagination but do they help? Yes, of course they do. It's incredibly naive to think or suggest otherwise.

What I always find interesting about these threads, though, is how they almost invariably present looks V personality as a binary either/or situation, as if people can only be good-looking but dickheads, or sound but ugly.

Some of the most attractive people I know are incredibly personable, funny and intelligent. Likewise, I've known plenty of utter dickbags with faces only a mother could love. There's also a weird attitude you see on here all the time that the only good-looking people with good personalities are the ones who aren't aware of their looks. Also bollix, in my opinion. Attractive people tend to know they're attractive. But if they're sound, it matters not a jot.

Wibbs

Dial Hard wrote: »

They're not the main thing in life by any stretch of the imagination but do they help? Yes, of course they do. It's incredibly naive to think or suggest otherwise.

What I always find interesting about these threads, though, is how they almost invariably present looks V personality as a binary either/or situation, as if people can only be good-looking but dickheads, or sound but ugly.

Some of the most attractive people I know are incredibly personable, funny and intelligent. Likewise, I've known plenty of utter dickbags with faces only a mother could love. There's also a weird attitude you see on here all the time that the only good-looking people with good personalities are the ones who aren't aware of their looks. Also bollix, in my opinion. Attractive people tend to know they're attractive. But if they're sound, it matters not a jot.

Quoted for truth. Especially the binary either/or part. Seems to be a self hugging thing with some that life balances out somehow and this is more equitable. It doesn't. Hell, everyone here, even if they've a face like a bulldog licking piss off a nettle, has through dumb luck been born in the first world and all the life bonus points that brings with it. That's not "fair" either.

Ush1

Dial Hard wrote: »

They're not the main thing in life by any stretch of the imagination but do they help? Yes, of course they do. It's incredibly naive to think or suggest otherwise.

What I always find interesting about these threads, though, is how they almost invariably present looks V personality as a binary either/or situation, as if people can only be good-looking but dickheads, or sound but ugly.

Some of the most attractive people I know are incredibly personable, funny and intelligent. Likewise, I've known plenty of utter dickbags with faces only a mother could love. There's also a weird attitude you see on here all the time that the only good-looking people with good personalities are the ones who aren't aware of their looks. Also bollix, in my opinion. Attractive people tend to know they're attractive. But if they're sound, it matters not a jot.

Same rubbish about athletes or muscular people being thick. Makes actual thick unattractive people feel better about themselves I suppose.