Drug abuse

yeppydeppy

I have a friend whose daughter displays all the signs of drug abuse. I have no problem with people taking drugs as long as it doesn't impact others.
This is not the case for my friend.
He is in denial that his daughter has a problem and continues to give her money to fund the habit.
She has come up with every excuse under the sun to request more and more money, from car break downs to rent to sickness.
I've tried to tell him but he doesn't want to listen.

I'd like to help - somehow? Report her to the garda?
Advice?

miamee

I really don't think that there is anything you can do other than being there for your friend. There is nothing you can say to him to open his eyes - he probably realises what is happening but has his head in the sand, "it's just a phase", "She'll get sick of it", "She'll never turn into one of those junkies, not my little girl" etc.

I doubt the Gardaí would be too interested in her unless she is dealing drugs or stealing from her family (this may come later when the handouts dry up) and your friend will not thank you for it. Really you can just be there for him when it gets worse - it sounds like it probably will get worse.

yeppydeppy

I've no idea if she's dealing but she did try to steal another friends iPhone: we were all out for a night and had had a few drinks. The next thing our mutual friend reported her phone was missing. We all searched but no sign. She eventually found it in yer one's handbag - switched to silent. It was put down to a mistake but we suspected the truth - that was in the early days.

Protect yourself ander family first and foremost OP
there is a drug dealer intimidation reporting helpline don t know it off top of my head though.

endacl

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Protect yourself ander family first and foremost OP
there is a drug dealer intimidation reporting helpline don t know it off top of my head though.

Relevance?

wiggle16

The only thing you can do is support your friend and be there when he does finally face the facts. Dont interfere. It would only backfire on you.

She will eventually run out of excuses and he will run out of patience (if he doesn't run out of money first). Try to avoid being around her in the meanwhile. This isn't your problem - try to keep it that way.

Flibble

Op, I mean this in the nicest way possible, but it really isn't any of your business.

I get that you're worried for your friends, but this is his own problem. All you can/should do, is take a back seat, butt out, and support him if he needs it by giving him an ear to talk to and a shoulder to cry on, should the need arise.

Your role in this is a passive supportive one. You cannot and should not ACTIVELY intervene.

This is his lesson to learn, and this is her path to figure out, you can't rush the process without causing much harm to everyone and losing your friend in the process. If she's an addict, she will never change until she wants to. If he's enabling her, he will never change until he faces reality, and facing reality might mean cutting his daughter out if his life. Reaching this point takes years and years of heartbreak and destruction, you can't rush that.

Know your place in all of this OP, and back off. Be a supportive shoulder, nothing good can come of forcing a resolution here.

Defunkd

yeppydeppy wrote: »

He is in denial...
I've tried to tell him but he doesn't want to listen.

There's no so blind as those that don't want to see...
Don't talk about it until he raises the issue, however long it may be. Ask about how she/other kids are doing, if you usually ask that but otherwise, gotta let them deal with it. You introducing a third-party could just be damaging to everyone.

yeppydeppy

Point taken, I should leave it alone. As a matter of interest have any of you been through something similar?

yeppydeppy

I will leave it alone.