Nuns/priests returning to civilian life??

Spon Farmer

Hello,

Sorry if there is already something about this here, I've searched for a similar thread but found none. I've also tried google but can't find a satisfactory answer.

After taking vows, can a young nun or priest resign in the first few years?

Whenever they leave the religious life are they allow to get married or is it dependant on the order they were with?

Cheers

EirWatchr

Spon Farmer wrote: »

After taking vows, can a young nun or priest resign in the first few years?

Whenever they leave the religious life are they allow to get married or is it dependant on the order they were with?

Yes, a priest can be laicized, by his own wishes, and go on to marry. The dispensation from celibacy has to come from the Pope. Some laicized priests may not seek that (i.e. remain celibate). Some may want to be laicized for it (i.e. to get married) - there was a case of it happening in the Dublin diocese recently.

'Resignation' is not really the term used because the clerical state (like baptism) is a sacramentally conferred state that can never be lost. A laicized priest can no longer validly do what he used to (mass, confession), but is still obliged to certain things, e.g. if he encounters a dying person who wants confession, he is obliged to hear a confession then.

pawdee

My aunt was in a convent training to be a nun. She packed it in at some stage and moved to London. I'm not sure what the procedure was or whether she was de-briefed on her way out.

I stayed with her while working on a building site one summer and she organised a strippagram for my 21st. I opened the front door and there was a pregnant nun. She started to get her kit off and my aunty (the Lord have mercy on her) was in fits laughing. Innocent times!

EirWatchr

pawdee wrote: »

My aunt was in a convent training to be a nun. She packed it in at some stage and moved to London. I'm not sure what the procedure was or whether she was de-briefed on her way out.

I should also point out (in relation to the OP) that formation for the priesthood goes on for more than a few years (7), and the vows are only taken at the end of that. It's not unknown for candidates to the priesthood to decide the vows or the vocation is not for them and leave during that period. In fact, it's one of the reasons for the duration of it.

Spon Farmer

EirWatchr wrote: »

I should also point out (in relation to the OP) that formation for the priesthood goes on for more than a few years (7), and the vows are only taken at the end of that. It's not unknown for candidates to the priesthood to decide the vows or the vocation is not for them and leave during that period. In fact, it's one of the reasons for the duration of it.

What about nuns?

Is it the same for them, dependant on the order or are they celibate for life?

Spon Farmer

pawdee wrote: »

My aunt was in a convent training to be a nun. She packed it in at some stage and moved to London. I'm not sure what the procedure was or whether she was de-briefed on her way out.

I stayed with her while working on a building site one summer and she organised a strippagram for my 21st. I opened the front door and there was a pregnant nun. She started to get her kit off and my aunty (the Lord have mercy on her) was in fits laughing. Innocent times!

Was the strippagram pregnant or just dressed to look pregnant?

EirWatchr

Spon Farmer wrote: »

What about nuns?

Is it the same for them, dependant on the order or are they celibate for life?

I think it is even more stringent upon them. Priests undertake celibacy as a discipline, but nuns & monks take a solemn vow of celibacy (chastity) to God, so breaking it is a serious matter, before God. Think perjury, only more grave.

Some ordered religious (e.g. sisters) don't take the solemn perpetual vow, and may only do so later, when they become a nun. Again, there is time set-aside for each stage of formation before which a candidate will take various vows. The progression of that depends on the order (and the candidate).

pawdee

Spon Farmer wrote: »

Was the strippagram pregnant or just dressed to look pregnant?

She was just dressed up to look pregnant. A pillow up the habit kind of thing. She started by asking where I'd been hiding for the last 9 months. Side splittingly funny needless to say.

Cabaal

Had a relation who left the priesthood, he was told never to return back to his home town by the bishop and the local priest visited his mother and told her to burn every photo of him. (she didn't)

So it can be done, hopefully the twisted reaction of the church has changed somewhat since.

Spon Farmer

Cabaal wrote: »

Had a relation who left the priesthood, he was told never to return back to his home town by the bishop and the local priest visited his mother and told her to burn every photo of him. (she didn't)

So it can be done, hopefully the twisted reaction of the church has changed somewhat since.

When was that?

Peregrinus

Spon Farmer wrote: »

Hello,

Sorry if there is already something about this here, I've searched for a similar thread but found none. I've also tried google but can't find a satisfactory answer.

After taking vows, can a young nun or priest resign in the first few years?

Whenever they leave the religious life are they allow to get married or is it dependant on the order they were with?

Cheers

As others have pointed out, people typically spend several years in formation/preparation/training/postulancy/whatever before they become ordained/take vows. It's extremely common for people to leave during this period, and it's not a drama. There's no canonical process involved.

After you have been ordained/professed/made your final vows then it's a bigger deal. There is a process by which you are removed from the clerical state; it can take a little while. Typically would be given leave of absence from whatever church role they are filling and would go off and start their new post-clerical lives while their canonical status gets sorted out over a period.

There are separate canonical processes for (a) being released from the clerical state, and (b) being dispensed from the vow of celibacy. As has been said, being dispensed from the obligation of celibacy is a bigger production for monastics (monks and nuns) than it is for secular clergy (diocesan priests), but everyone who wants to go through the process can. Some people chose not to, either because they have no wish to marry or because they marry outside the church. Some people don't do it initially but do it later on.

beertons

I know of a man who was a priest in India. Met a Nun over there, they clicked. Both left, got married and set up home in Ireland with 8 kids of their own.

Spon Farmer

Any idea of how long they had been in service?

beertons

Spon Farmer wrote: »

Any idea of how long they had been in service?

No idea, sorry.

martinedwards

Not RC, but I have a friend who's a C of I priest who left the ministry for 10 years to do other stuff, then went back.

no celibacy issues of course but that's a different thread!