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Asking to put a plaque on a grave?

  • 16-01-2018 8:35pm
    #1
    BottleOfSmoke
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 83 ✭✭


    I am not a Christian, and am looking for advice on whether something might be considered rude.
    My close relative is in a Catholic graveyard in a plot with five others. I recently met the church-going relative who erected the headstone and tends to the grave. There are no other ornaments on the grave.
    When I walk around the graveyard, I see that some other graves have additional plaques or ornaments with personal messages to their father/mother/child etc.
    I would like to ask my relative if I could put a small plaque on the grave with a personal message. Would I be rude or obtrusive in asking? I'm not sure if it's like asking someone to let me nail a picture to their kitchen wall, or if a grave is seen as a communal place?


Comments

  • #2
    _Brian
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18,718 ✭✭✭✭_Brian


    BottleOfSmoke wrote: »
    I am not a Christian, and am looking for advice on whether something might be considered rude.
    My close relative is in a Catholic graveyard in a plot with five others. I recently met the church-going relative who erected the headstone and tends to the grave. There are no other ornaments on the grave.
    When I walk around the graveyard, I see that some other graves have additional plaques or ornaments with personal messages to their father/mother/child etc.
    I would like to ask my relative if I could put a small plaque on the grave with a personal message. Would I be rude or obtrusive in asking? I'm not sure if it's like asking someone to let me nail a picture to their kitchen wall, or if a grave is seen as a communal place?

    Providing its tasteful there should be no bother.. Now some psople are obsessed with keeping graves clear so thats a possibility


  • #3
    Peregrinus
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,992 ✭✭✭✭Peregrinus


    BottleOfSmoke wrote: »
    I would like to ask my relative if I could put a small plaque on the grave with a personal message. Would I be rude or obtrusive in asking? I'm not sure if it's like asking someone to let me nail a picture to their kitchen wall, or if a grave is seen as a communal place?
    Not rude at all, unless there is context that you are not giving us, like a bitter division between you and others in the family.

    Note that you may also need to clear it with the cemetery authorities. Some cemeteries have rules about what can and can't be put on grave plots. If you're seeing other plaques then it can be done, but there may be rules about clearing it first, or about size, design, etc, that you would want to know about before you went ahead.


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