Suffering from severe and violent bouts of flatulence

um7y1h83ge06nx

Lads I'm suffering, had a good beef dinner washed down with some wine and Guinness. Possibility I may blow a second hole in my arse. Any tips?

Specialun

happy new year to all in your place

davyboy1975

New year fireworks

myshirt

Well you are asking for it then op aren't you. There was a woman killed via a bad Guinness fart less than 10 years ago.

um7y1h83ge06nx

Specialun wrote: »

happy new year to all in your place

I know, trying hard to prevent collateral damage. All civilian deaths will be greatly regretted.

weiland79

Make sure when you do one in bed later you get your head under the duvet.

splinter65

Adan Tart Sieve wrote: »

Lads I'm suffering, had a good beef dinner washed down with some wine and Guinness. Possibility I may blow a second hole in my arse. Any tips?

Billy Connolly’s tip is never trust a fart .

myshirt

weiland79 wrote: »

Make sure when you do one in bed later you get your head under the duvet.

Yes, and put the wife's head under the covers for comedic effect. Funny at one stage, but a lady was killed when her husband unwittingly created a tight seal putting the blanket over her head. A Dutch oven gone very wrong.

Bonzo Delaney

A Dutch oven I think it's called
Anyway happy New year ****ers

Why suffer
Just enjoy the ride

um7y1h83ge06nx

weiland79 wrote: »

Make sure when you do one in bed later you get your head under the duvet.

Just like Ready Brek, central heating for kids!

Kristopherus

And a Farting New Year to you ,OP.

me_irl

Shove confetti in there and stick your ar$e in the air.

Fart it around like you just don't care.

JenovaProject

Thoughts and prayers OP

L.Jenkins

OP reminds me of this:

the_pen_turner

great username . very apt

cassid

If you have no peppermint or meds in the house then just boil some water, let it cool a little and sip it until it is all gone. It takes down swelling and settles your tummy. Farting is good, at least you are getting it out

Hector Savage

myshirt wrote: »

Yes, and put the wife's head under the covers for comedic effect. Funny at one stage, but a lady was killed when her husband unwittingly created a tight seal putting the blanket over her head. A Dutch oven gone very wrong.

What ??

Really ?

http://www.ronsonwriter.com/content/view/69/9/

seems its a parody ..

mojesius

Eat some prunes.

Oldtree

splinter65 wrote: »

Billy Connolly’s tip is never trust a fart .

No truer words ever spoken

Don Kiddick

Stick a child's nappy down the back of your pants ..don't ask questions...just listen to the voice of experience...
Happy New Year !

the purple tin

is ok everyone has a big blow-out on new years eve

RobertKK

Happy New Year, you will have a gas time this year

Beanntraigheach

Get yourself a garden hose.
Feed one end out through a window opened just wide enough for the purpose, securing it with duct tape, then insert the other end firmly up your anus.
Now you can fart the night away in comfort, free from any concern of a malodourous assault upon your nostils.
Thank me later.

Major Lovechild

A kite is good for wind.

RobbingBandit

No beans for you. Come back 1 year.

Dakota Dan

myshirt wrote: »

Yes, and put the wife's head under the covers for comedic effect. Funny at one stage, but a lady was killed when her husband unwittingly created a tight seal putting the blanket over her head. A Dutch oven gone very wrong.

Have you a link for that?
Just found it.
http://www.ronsonwriter.com/content/view/69/9/