Living in fear of neighbour

DeltaWhite

Hoping someone can help or advise me on what to do about my neighbour.

There has been a long history with him, he has been aggressive and troublesome for about 15 years now. It all came to a head today when he hammered our door down with a wooden crutch and when my father answered the door he attacked him with said crutch. I ran down the stairs, pushed my father out of the way and slammed the door in his face. I was terrified he would smash the glass in the door and porch. He was screaming abuse this entire time. I have had enough at this point so I rang the guards and after a second call to them hours later they arrived after a second incident with the neighbour who said he would kill us all with a hammer.

I am uncontrollably shaking and crying when the guards arrive. Because the neighbour saw them arrive he came outside with the crutch he used as a weapon, and started shouting to the guards that we have "a buzzing sound" that's keeping him awake all night. This is simply untrue.

Since the 23rd of December, every day or night he has caused mayhem for us. He wakes up the house at around 4am/5am smashing the walls inside his house, attached to our side, repeatedly hammering for no reason whatsoever. Our house is dead silent from 12am onwards with everyone in bed or asleep. The list of this behaviour from him is a long and frustrating one but seems to have escalated to a frightening degree this month and I have no idea why. One of my brothers snapped and knocked in on 23rd of December and asked him what the f his problem is. He was incoherently shouting and roaring, almost every word out of his mouth was a curse. He claims that we have a "device" And we are recording/watching/listening to him. Again this is simply not true.

We at this point believe there are mental health issues and paranoia at play. We explained the above to the guards when they came but my father insisted he didn't want the man charged because he believes the man needs help. While that is admirable of my father, i am not happy with that decision. The guards advised that we are not to open the door to him or confront him and we are to call immediately if anything happens. Including the hammering.

They also advised that they were going to call into him to warn about the assault, but would be advising him to call them when he hears the buzzing sound that apparently we are causing. Which means we will be having our door knocked on at whatever hour that may be. This again I am really not happy about. This buzzing sound is probably all in his head. I can assure you all there is simply no buzzing sound ever in our house. Even if there was, his behaviour is frankly terrifying and we all feel like we are walking on eggshells all the time and since he is physically assualting my family members now, i just need help or advise from someone! I'm so afraid now. He lives alone and is known on our road as the recluse and had a very bad drinking problem some years ago. For the last 15 years we have tried to pretend he doesn't exist, not even making eye contact but at this point, it's gotten too serious to ignore.

After the guards left there were two loud bangs as if he threw something heavy against the wall. But it's been quiet since. I must be honest and say that I know this isn't over, if he is mentally unwell, a casual chat from the guards is not going to stop him as far as I'm concerned. We have kept a list of all incidents since 23rd Dec and will keep a record of anything going forward.

I would be grateful for any advice.

silverharp

log everything, use a phone or video camera to record the banging or if he comes to the door again, and if he assaults anyone again get him charged, your dad was too soft its not like the old guy would be sent to prison but it could be the start of getting him into care.

lostie815

How long has this been going on ? what sparked it ? how old is the man next door ? there is two sides to every story but if what you say is true maybe try going to Social Welfare so that they can have someone call in and see if he's ok I'm not defending his actions but seems like something is missing here ?

njs030

The guards can detain someone under the mental health act it's not just arrest and prison

I can understand not wanting him to go to prison but there's very little point calling the guards and then telling them not to do their job and take him in. Next time it happens let them arrest him and they can have him assessed and if he needs to be detained in a mental health institution for his safety they can see that it happens.

DeltaWhite

There absolutely is a starting point with this behaviour. My mother who died in 2014 had serious mental health issues, we had an emergency about 15 years ago where a nurse came to our house in a hurry and parked outside his house and blocked his driveway. He then came back from the shop and lost the plot when he couldn't get in with his car (only about 5 mins delay). Understandable? I dont feel it is. How he behaved when my father went out to apologise and explain was ridiculous, he exploded in a tirade of abuse and it has been the same way since. We never had any problems prior to that we just kept to our own and so did he.

For some reason he seems to hate my father like all this abuse is mostly directed at him. He has a son who is about 30, doesn't live with him anymore because of the abuse he got too. It was astonishing hearing how he spoke to him.

We have still helped him throughout this time, even helping him get back into his house when he was locked out, we phoned an ambulance for him one night when he collapsed outside his house pissed out of his mind and he couldn't remember his house alarm code which woke a lot of the road up and while people stood and stared, it was my family that helped. He lay outside his front door wide open kicking the door screaming drunk. I feel we have done more than enough for him and have tried to stay out of his way also.

His behaviour does seem to kick off around Christmas and I guess living alone so long with literally no contact with anyone has made him the recluse that he is. Pretty sure the alcoholism didn't help. When my brother climbed in his window to let him into his house (with his permission) he said there were bottles of pills scattered all over the sitting room. What they're for I don't know.

The guards told us to try and speak with his son who randomly appears so it will be hard to catch him. And I agree, my father is way too soft and if it had been me that was assaulted I would have 100% pressed charges against him.

DeltaWhite

Apologies I meant to say I reckon he is in his mid 60s?

lostie815

It sounds like that Man has lived a rough life and Depression could be a factor here I think you should speak to his son possibly look him up through social media. I think your father done the right thing in not pressing charges but you should visit a information desk and look at your options should his son not bother to treat the matter seriously.

DeltaWhite

lostie815 wrote: »

It sounds like that Man has lived a rough life and Depression could be a factor here I think you should speak to his son possibly look him up through social media. I think your father done the right thing in not pressing charges but you should visit a information desk and look at your options should his son not bother to treat the matter seriously.

I really appreciate the comments from all, i am going out of my mind all day. Jumping at every sound and I am so terrified if my father even goes out to put stuff in the bin. I cant and shouldn't have to live this way so I absolutely will take all advice and try to get the man the help he clearly needs. Otherwise I can't see any end to this nightmare.

Wesser

Ask the guards to initiate an application for him to be involuntary admitted to a psychiatric hospital.

OnDraught

You don't have a fishtank running in one of the rooms by any chance?

DeltaWhite

OnDraught wrote: »

You don't have a fishtank running in one of the rooms by any chance?

We don't no, i genuinely have no idea what buzzing sound he is talking about. Our dishwasher is very quiet and it's never on after 7pm. We don't have any sort of devices that would cause this noise. Shower, washing machine etc, none of these things are used past say 10pm and he is claiming that this buzzing happens in the middle of the night. The only thing he can hear is the tv. We purposely live quietly out of fear of him.

ETA we did explain this to the guards too and my brother mentioned if there was a buzzing sound, we would hear it. It would be keeping us up too and I can categorically state that our house is dead silent during the night. I'm a very light sleeper and have been awake during the 5am hammer sessions and there is dead silence. Apart from him smashing the walls apart with whatever he has lying around.

trixiebust

Oh, I feel your pain. We had fantastic neighbors for years, until 2 years ago we got neighbors from hell who moved in next door. Constant noise & the don't give a fcuk attitude from them, has made our lives hell. Feeling like a prisoner in your own home is exhausting, confusing, & terrifying. So much so, we've decided to leave.

Definitely log everything from now on, & record banging noise's etc on your phone. If theres irrefutable evidence, it makes your case much stronger.

DeltaWhite

trixiebust wrote: »

Oh, I feel your pain. We had fantastic neighbors for years, until 2 years ago we got neighbors from hell who moved in next door. Constant noise & the don't give a fcuk attitude from them, has made our lives hell. Feeling like a prisoner in your own home is exhausting, confusing, & terrifying. So much so, we've decided to leave.

Definitely log everything from now on, & record banging noise's etc on your phone. If theres irrefutable evidence, it makes your case much stronger.

I wish we could move but we've lived here 20 years and my father just fell apart after mam died, he had a heart attack and cancer all in 3 years. He is just not able for this carry on. He's such a quiet man who has never ever put a toe out of line his whole life and I just feel so sad that hes going through this. If it wasn't for me he wouldn't have even called the guards. He's really shaken up about it, can barely eat all day so I'm livid. I hope an end comes to all of this but I think it's highly unlikely. My nephew who is 7 stays here during the week and he sometimes answers the door out of excitement because its usually me or one of his uncles so we will have to sit him down and tell him not to do that anymore. I would be so afraid for him as well as the rest of the family.

njs030

Wesser wrote: »

Ask the guards to initiate an application for him to be involuntary admitted to a psychiatric hospital.

I'm confused at this?
They can section someone themselves if they feel it's necessary they don't need to make an application.

trixiebust

DeltaWhite wrote: »

I wish we could move but we've lived here 20 years and my father just fell apart after mam died, he had a heart attack and cancer all in 3 years. He is just not able for this carry on. He's such a quiet man who has never ever put a toe out of line his whole life and I just feel so sad that hes going through this. If it wasn't for me he wouldn't have even called the guards. He's really shaken up about it, can barely eat all day so I'm livid. I hope an end comes to all of this but I think it's highly unlikely. My nephew who is 7 stays here during the week and he sometimes answers the door out of excitement because its usually me or one of his uncles so we will have to sit him down and tell him not to do that anymore. I would be so afraid for him as well as the rest of the family.

We had to do the same regarding answering the door. Ours is also always locked when we are home, just in case. It's such a sad way to live, but better safe than sorry. I would be like the description you gave of your father, too soft tbh. I feel the family next door realised this & actually enjoyed upsetting us so much. They have done so much damage to our mental health & all we feel is powerless against them.

Again, log everything - phone calls to guards, noise disturbance times etc etc. Is yours a private house or council ?

njs030

DeltaWhite wrote: »

I wish we could move but we've lived here 20 years and my father just fell apart after mam died, he had a heart attack and cancer all in 3 years. He is just not able for this carry on. He's such a quiet man who has never ever put a toe out of line his whole life and I just feel so sad that hes going through this. If it wasn't for me he wouldn't have even called the guards. He's really shaken up about it, can barely eat all day so I'm livid. I hope an end comes to all of this but I think it's highly unlikely. My nephew who is 7 stays here during the week and he sometimes answers the door out of excitement because its usually me or one of his uncles so we will have to sit him down and tell him not to do that anymore. I would be so afraid for him as well as the rest of the family.

Your poor dad probably doesn't want the guilt of sending the man to prison, but maybe if you explained he will be seen by a doctor in the guard station and they will assess his mental health, and if he needs any help they will make sure he gets it your dad might feel that he's helping him a bit?
It's not fair on you lot to put up with that behaviour.

DeltaWhite

trixiebust wrote: »

We had to do the same regarding answering the door. Ours is also always locked when we are home, just in case. It's such a sad way to live, but better safe than sorry. I would be like the description you gave of your father, too soft tbh. I feel the family next door realised this & actually enjoyed upsetting us so much. They have done so much damage to our mental health & all we feel is powerless against them.

Again, log everything - phone calls to guards, noise disturbance times etc etc. Is yours a private house or council ?

I can understand my dad wants a quiet life and never wanted any trouble his whole life but there comes a time when you have to do what's right as far as I'm concerned. It's gone on way longer than it ever should have. Ours is a private house, we lived in a council house in a very bad area prior to this house so it was bliss moving to a lovely area on a nice road with welcoming people. But it was partially ruined because of him. He has a reputation on this road even before we moved here.

He has crashed into peoples parked cars if he feels they are too close to his garden. He's threatened kids who played near his car and i quote "ill shove that effing football up your hole" to a 7 year old child. It's just insane.

DeltaWhite

notjustsweet wrote: »

Your poor dad probably doesn't want the guilt of sending the man to prison, but maybe if you explained he will be seen by a doctor in the guard station and they will assess his mental health, and if he needs any help they will make sure he gets it your dad might feel that he's helping him a bit?
It's not fair on you lot to put up with that behaviour.

My dad mentioned earlier to me "we just wont talk about it" and that's pretty much him in a nutshell. I am the only female in the family and I am the opposite of them all. I wont just ignore this, I will do whatever possible to make it stop. Because ignoring it hasn't worked so that's not the answer. So I will take your advice and try reassure him that this is for the best.

trixiebust

DeltaWhite wrote: »

I can understand my dad wants a quiet life and never wanted any trouble his whole life but there comes a time when you have to do what's right as far as I'm concerned. It's gone on way longer than it ever should have. Ours is a private house, we lived in a council house in a very bad area prior to this house so it was bliss moving to a lovely area on a nice road with welcoming people. But it was partially ruined because of him. He has a reputation on this road even before we moved here.

He has crashed into peoples parked cars if he feels they are too close to his garden. He's threatened kids who played near his car and i quote "ill shove that effing football up your hole" to a 7 year old child. It's just insane.

The guards I spoke to about noise told me to contact the local council, even though ours is private too. Some device they provide which will measure sound levels. Not sure if he was trying to fob me off tbh, but that was the advice I was given. I'm sure something like that could be bought online too?

RabbleRouser2k

Had dealings with a psychotic housemate in the past, and she was a nightmare. I only mention her because she had, from the sounds of things, the same illnesses as your neighbour.
This doesn't sound like depression. From what you describe it's more like alcoholism combined with either paranoid schizophrenia, or some kind of ptsd or manic disorder. (Again, from my own experiences)
His claiming to hear a humming noise is indicative of some paranoia. I would argue the son bore the brunt of his abuse, and when he left he needed a new target, and sadly, there you were.
My advice, record everything, be it video or audio recording. Call the guards when he starts bashing the door. If he claims to hear a hum, they will be able to confirm nothing is there. Your dads quiet demeanor will only allow things escalate.

Silverfish

On the buzzing sound - have you a box for your alarm? Would it be on the shared wall? Mine is only audible in my bedroom as the box is on the other side of the wall and it actually drove me mad with the noise until I changed systems. It couldn’t be heard anywhere else in the house at all.

Never wrestle with pigs

Tell him you do have a device that's watching and listening to his every move and it's linked in with the local Garda station. He'll either crack and be sent away or stay quiet 😂

notsoyoungwan

notjustsweet wrote: »

I'm confused at this?
They can section someone themselves if they feel it's necessary they don't need to make an application.

No, they can’t. They can arrest someone if they have concerns for their mental health but then they need to make an application for an involuntary assessment. After they make the application they will have to arrange for a GP to see the person and then if the GP has concerns and believes the person meets the criteria for detention under the mental health act the GP will sign a recommendation and only then can the person be brought to hospital against their will.

DeltaWhite

Silverfish wrote: »

On the buzzing sound - have you a box for your alarm? Would it be on the shared wall? Mine is only audible in my bedroom as the box is on the other side of the wall and it actually drove me mad with the noise until I changed systems. It couldn’t be heard anywhere else in the house at all.

We actually don't have a house alarm, i know that sounds strange but there's always someone here in the house so it's just not something we ever had installed.

Last night no sounds coming from him thankfully. I do agree that it sounds like a mental illness of some sort. His behaviour over the years is not normal and has become increasingly erratic. He's an abusive person to anyone he meets. Anyone who knocks on his door is met with abuse!

Wesser

This man is mentally ill. Ask the gardai to fill in the form to have him sectioned. There 3 to be done in total. Ask the gardai to fill in the first.

listermint

I'd agree he is mentally ill. And through his actions he is impatient the mental wellness of those in his surroundings. I'd be on to the guards.

This is not rational behaviour

Rosie Rant

OP, do you plug out your television at night or leave it on standby? If it's on standby and is against a shared wall it could be the cause of the humming sound your neighbour describes. Years ago, a family member used to go mad whenever the television wasn't plugged out because their room was on the other side of the wall and they could hear a humming, buzzing noise all night.

I thought they were a bit bonkers until I stayed in that room one night when they were away and heard the infuriating noise for myself. I do think your neighbour has mental health issues or at least anger issues but it's possible that after the confrontation with your dad over his parking space he began to blame your dad for the noise he was hearing and convinced himself your dad was using a device to torment him.

listermint

Have you considered the noise is in his own house ... Or there is no noise.

Batgurl

Why are you waiting for your dad to press charges? You live there too and you are a victim of this mans abuse so why can’t you press charges? Log everything and bring it to the guards and say you want him charged with harassment.

If everything you say is true, it sounds like the noise is either in his head or perhaps the beginning of deafness or a hearing disorder?

Teyla Emmagan

Yes, can you not press charges yourself. Or whatever the correct term is, you hardly need your father's permission. You can't be afraid for your nephew or the health and safety of the other people living in the house, that is insane. I understand your father is a gentle man but he has also been unwell, this can't be good for him. Your neighbour needs to be assessed. If it turns out he's fine then he's just run of the mill mad. But if not he needs to be in a facility or receiving appropriate care. He obviously has no one to look after him.

The Guards will just take him away, there won't necessarily be any drama. He could be gone without you even knowing. And then you can all get on with your lives.

DeltaWhite

Rosie Rant wrote: »

OP, do you plug out your television at night or leave it on standby? If it's on standby and is against a shared wall it could be the cause of the humming sound your neighbour describes. Years ago, a family member used to go mad whenever the television wasn't plugged out because their room was on the other side of the wall and they could hear a humming, buzzing noise all night.

I thought they were a bit bonkers until I stayed in that room one night when they were away and heard the infuriating noise for myself. I do think your neighbour has mental health issues or at least anger issues but it's possible that after the confrontation with your dad over his parking space he began to blame your dad for the noise he was hearing and convinced himself your dad was using a device to torment him.

Our houses are attached together at the hall/stairs/landing so the most he hears is people going up and down the stairs. That's all we can hear from his side. And we do unplug everything at night, I lost my best friend in a house fire 10 years ago so we are all very fire safety conscious in the house because of that.

I actually put my ear against the wall a few days ago and could hear a strange humming coming from his side so I believe that's what hes hearing. Even though it was very faint. Either that or hes hearing it in his head.

I'm going to take control of this situation because I know my dad is just hoping it will go away. Avoidance is a big trait in the men in my family. But I'm not that way inclined and what if next time he decides to use a knife as a weapon? Im just not having it. One more bang out of him and I will be calling the guards and telling them I want to press charges.

Finnbar01

DeltaWhite wrote: »

Our houses are attached together at the hall/stairs/landing so the most he hears is people going up and down the stairs. That's all we can hear from his side. And we do unplug everything at night, I lost my best friend in a house fire 10 years ago so we are all very fire safety conscious in the house because of that.

I actually put my ear against the wall a few days ago and could hear a strange humming coming from his side so I believe that's what hes hearing. Even though it was very faint. Either that or hes hearing it in his head.

I'm going to take control of this situation because I know my dad is just hoping it will go away. Avoidance is a big trait in the men in my family. But I'm not that way inclined and what if next time he decides to use a knife as a weapon? Im just not having it. One more bang out of him and I will be calling the guards and telling them I want to press charges.

That might be the best thing for him because the judge may make an order for him to be psychiatrically accessed.

DeltaWhite

It just so happens that the neighbours son appeared today so my dad called him in and told him what happened. The son said he tried to tell his father that there is no buzzing sound. He never hears it. So our fears about this being in his head may be true as we thought. He didnt seem shocked when my dad told him about being attacked yesterday and that we had to call the guards. My dad just told him that either he, as his only family gets him mental help, or we will go the guards route. So it's in his hands now but again I am ready to record and log literally anything he does from now on. I was up til 4am worrying and practically waiting for the banging to start. I'm not planning on continuing that worrying so for now I will be getting on with life and the new year.

I really appreciate all the help I received on this thread, you all helped me big time on a really upsetting day. Can't thank everyone enough for that.

SusieBlue

Glad you got it somewhat sorted, hopefully the man will get himself some help now that he realises how serious this is.

Just wanted to say that in regards to the Gardai sectioning him, I wouldn’t count on it.
I have a relative with severe mental health issues, he has stabbed his brother, he has kicked his 2yr old nephew down the stars, he has knocked his own mother unconscious with such savage beatings her face is scarred, he has tried to smother his pregnant girlfriend, I could go on and on.
He is a paranoid schitzophrenic and all this happened during times he was off medication. Each time, the guards arrested him over night but realeased him the next morning as they don’t feel he is severe enough to be sectioned.
His family have contacted TD’s to help their plight to have him committed but nobody wants to know.

Unfortunately unless he admits himself to a hospital the guards won’t do anything. Hopefully his son will encourage him to resolve these issues because otherwise your only hope is that you can prosecute him for an assault.

All the best to you and your dad for 2018, fingers crossed this is the end of the drama.

RabbleRouser2k

DeltaWhite wrote: »

It just so happens that the neighbours son appeared today so my dad called him in and told him what happened. The son said he tried to tell his father that there is no buzzing sound. He never hears it. So our fears about this being in his head may be true as we thought. He didnt seem shocked when my dad told him about being attacked yesterday and that we had to call the guards. My dad just told him that either he, as his only family gets him mental help, or we will go the guards route. So it's in his hands now but again I am ready to record and log literally anything he does from now on. I was up til 4am worrying and practically waiting for the banging to start. I'm not planning on continuing that worrying so for now I will be getting on with life and the new year.

I really appreciate all the help I received on this thread, you all helped me big time on a really upsetting day. Can't thank everyone enough for that.

If it was depression, he more than likely wouldn't leave the house, or even his bedroom. There wouldn't be the level of stress on his family. That condition generally doesn't lead to that kind of aggression. Instead, it sounds like a far more severe mental illness. He also may have either stopped taking his medication, or is mixing his meds with alcohol or other substances. If thats the case, the son's lack of surprise was telling.

Feel free to continue to post, and even vent if needs be. This kind of thing can eat away at ye.

Rushden

WhiteRoses wrote: »

Glad you got it somewhat sorted, hopefully the man will get himself some help now that he realises how serious this is.

Just wanted to say that in regards to the Gardai sectioning him, I wouldn’t count on it.
I have a relative with severe mental health issues, he has stabbed his brother, he has kicked his 2yr old nephew down the stars, he has knocked his own mother unconscious with such savage beatings her face is scarred, he has tried to smother his pregnant girlfriend, I could go on and on.
He is a paranoid schitzophrenic and all this happened during times he was off medication. Each time, the guards arrested him over night but realeased him the next morning as they don’t feel he is severe enough to be sectioned.
His family have contacted TD’s to help their plight to have him committed but nobody wants to know.

Unfortunately unless he admits himself to a hospital the guards won’t do anything. Hopefully his son will encourage him to resolve these issues because otherwise your only hope is that you can prosecute him for an assault.

All the best to you and your dad for 2018, fingers crossed this is the end of the drama.

Well they release him because they've no choice, seems to be a misunderstanding here under what the guards power is with mental health. They've no power to section anybody , they can arrest them to be assessed by a gp, if the gp doesn't section them they have to be immediately released from Garda custody. Even the majority of the time if they are admitted to hospital they get released within a day or two, another issue for the excellent mental health services in this country ...........

njs030

Rushden wrote: »

Well they release him because they've no choice, seems to be a misunderstanding here under what the guards power is with mental health. They've no power to section anybody , they can arrest them to be assessed by a gp, if the gp doesn't section them they have to be immediately released from Garda custody. Even the majority of the time if they are admitted to hospital they get released within a day or two, another issue for the excellent mental health services in this country ...........

I think it was just me that was wrong and I was corrected earlier in the thread.
Guards have the power to detain people (until seen by a doctor) under the mental health act rather than section them,
I confused detained and sectioned stupidly! Sorry all

Soulsun

Do you have storage heating?

pwurple

Move.

15 years of this? He is only in his 60’s, there could be another 20 in him.

Move house. Life is too short to put up with this.

Ghekko

Just trying to think of other devices that make a buzzing noise, to exhaust that avenue. Would he or you have one of those plug in boxes for keeping mice away? I do however think it's all in his head from either mental health issue and abusing his body with alcohol and whatever pills were in his house.

DeltaWhite

We don't have any storage heaters and we also have no plug ins or anything like that. We actually purposely creep around the house these days. Unlike him, he stamps up and down the stairs. He stands out his back garden roaring/cursing at the various dogs in the area barking (which is not constant by a long shot, its very minimal).

I am fairly sure this could be in his head or a hearing problem like someone mentioned in this thread. When I mentioned that to my dad he agreed because any time we did have dealings with him before everything went sour you would have to shout so he could hear. So how he claims to hear a buzzing sound is beyond me if he can barely hear a person talking in front of him. All has been quiet since. His son apologised although my dad reassured him that it's not his fault. The son said his father has been going on about this buzzing sound a while now, but he has never once heard it. Funny that he hasn't rang the guards (like they advised him) to tell them he can hear the sound, since he claims its happening every night.

Fakediamond

I’m sure the buzzing has nothing to do with your house, it’s probably in his head.

As others say, keep logging incidents, calling Gardai when threatened in any way and don’t ever respond or open the door to him. Let Gardai deal with all incidents, it would help if they arrived in the middle of an incident so they can see for themselves how menacing it is to be on the receiving end and how your family is not involved in a tit for tat situation, but are innocent bystanders and victims.

If it continues, or if he causes criminal damage or assaults anyone, Gardai will be forced to take action. I know your dad doesn’t want to rock the boat, but it’s not as if he will upset his neighbour by pressing charges, he’s already the neighbour from hell and seeing it through is the quickest way to get it resolved, by either having him bound over to the peace, or getting him psychiatric help, whichever is appropriate.

Alun

Could tinnitus of some kind be a possibility?

kylith

Alun wrote: »

Could tinnitus of some kind be a possibility?

Was just thinking this; tinnitus often gets worse at night because there's no other sounds to distract the brain from it, and if he doesn't know what it is then it would certainly be enough to drive him to distraction. Would tie in with the potential hearing loss too.

na1

I'm not a doctor but this could be  Delirium tremens: 
The main symptoms of delirium tremens are nightmares, agitation, global confusion, disorientation, visual and auditory hallucinations, tactile hallucinations, fever, high blood pressure, heavy sweating, and other signs of autonomic hyperactivity (fast heart rate and high blood pressure). These symptoms may appear suddenly, but typically develop two to three days after the stopping of heavy drinking, being worst on the fourth or fifth day.



Causes
Delirium tremens can occur when you stop drinking alcohol after a period of heavy drinking, especially if you do not eat enough food.
Delirium tremens may also be caused by head injury, infection, or illness in people with a history of heavy alcohol use.
It occurs most often in people who have a history of alcohol withdrawal. It is especially common in those who drink 4 to 5 pints (1.8 to 2.4 liters) of wine, 7 to 8 pints (3.3 to 3.8 liters) of beer, or 1 pint (1/2 liter) of "hard" alcohol every day for several months. Delirium tremens also commonly affects people who have used alcohol for more than 10 years.

looksee

It really doesn't matter whether it is tinnitus or anything else, his behaviour is not normal and he needs to be helped. The gardai are the only solution to this, it seems.

(I have hearing and tinnitus issues, it is very loud at the moment, but it does not stop me sleeping.)

Gregor Samsa

Lots of things can cause people to hear buzzing/ringing/rumbling. It can be mental illness, but it can also be the side effect of various medications, tinnitus, anemia or a host of other conditions. My dad thought he could hear the rumbling of the boring of the Dublin Port Tunnel every night for months, until he ended up in hospital with a perforated ulcer. The blood loss was causing anemia. As soon as he got it sorted out and went on iron supplements, he stopped hearing the noise.

My point is that the source of his belief that there’s a noise coming from your house - when you know full well that there isn’t - is none of your concern. It’s not something that you can diagnose. Your only concern is his wholly unreasonable behaviour. And it’s unreasonable regardless of what’s causing him to perceive the non-existent noise.

Follow the Guard’s advice. Call them when anything happens, and don’t engage with the man. Let them get family or social workers or mental health professionals involved as necessary. They have a lot more leverage in these areas than you or your family.

DeltaWhite

Again everyone much appreciate all the help and advice. There have been no assaults since last week. It's been fairly quiet since, apart from yesterday morning when I was up for work around 6.30 and he had his radio blaring (my dad said it was on all night as he woke up a few times from the sound of it). That's actually pretty normal for him, he always has his tv on full blast (probably because his hearing isn't great I imagine?). My dad is still pissed off about the whole thing so he thinks your man is blaring the radio on purpose, trying to cause disruption but not enough for us to call the guards. As far as I'm concerned any future hammering/assault is what I will be calling the guards for. Loud tv/radio is pretty normal behaviour from him, and something we can ignore. There was a delivery to his house on Tues for all his medication and the delivery man was hammering his door down for a good 15 minutes and no answer. So the guy just left with the medication. This stuff goes on all the time. He clearly shouldn't be living alone, because he isn't taking care of himself.

I know for sure he has mental health problems, because his behaviour is not normal. But I agree, I reckon he could have tinnitus which would explain why he's only hearing it at night (usually it's worse at night I'm told?). Not my problem though, any sane person would deal with the "buzzing" the correct way - by going to a doctor. I have zero empathy for this man as heartless as that sounds. It's just gone on way too long now for me to have any compassion for his circumstances. I'll be home all weekend so will be keeping an hear out for the hammering sessions!

Ghekko

Maybe he has copped on that the buzzing is in his own head and has the radio on to blank it out. What a nightmare living beside him. Ear plugs are a must for your poor dad if he's hearing the radio.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

Record everything. In a notebook, time date what happened and how you dealt with it. Record the guards name, time you called and what they told you.
Try get proof of each incident. Be that with cctv or recorded on a device while it's happening.

You can bring a case of harassment before the courts, it is quite hard to prove that's why you keep a record of absolutely everything and proof of everything. He has to be for me guilty of at least two incidents to be found guilty with harassment, keep everything to the facts, report to the gardai each time and try back it up with irrefutable proof.

Optimalprimerib

At this hour in the morning here there is an ambient buzzing noise in my house, that I just do not notice as you get used to it. Maybe in his mental state this noise is getting into his head.

It sounds like the poor man is in trouble, so I would be looking out to make sure he gets the treatment he needs especially if he is proving to be a danger to society.