I think my neighbour might be a witch

WoollyRedHat · 28-10-2017 12:13pm #1

Yes dear reader you read that correctly, I think my neighbour might be a real.. fire and brimstone witch. They have been exhibiting some suspicous signs for some time now but after reading the below link im now comvinced. .. especially the stray cat thing.

With halloween a few days away im afraid they might decide to eat the small children of the neighbourhood. What should i do.. confront them outright.. call a townhall meeting.. buy some pitchforks, or just move out of Salem?

http://turoks.net/Cabana/SignsThatYourNeighborMightBeAWitch.php

Outlaw Pete · 28-10-2017 12:31pm

Heat a glass up in the microwave, then holding it in a gloved hand walk past her and accidently on purpose bump into her, making sure the mug rubs along her breast.

If the glass shatters she's a witch, if not, then she isn't.

This works as there is nothing colder than a witches tit.

Sephiroth_dude · 28-10-2017 12:32pm

I wonder does there linen closet have a portal too the "other realm".

retro:electro · 28-10-2017 12:33pm

I think I might be your neighbour

LadyMacBeth_ · 28-10-2017 12:34pm

Just pour a bucket of water over her, if she's a witch she'll melt and if she isn't then you'll have a very angry neighbour.

Mr.Crinklewood · 28-10-2017 12:35pm

Mrs Crinklewood is calling over to see her mum, will you tell her she forgot her housekeys?

Princess Consuela Bananahammock · 28-10-2017 12:37pm

You're overthinking this just ask her if she's a witch. If it's not a personal question...

Barry Badrinath · 28-10-2017 12:41pm

You racist bastard OP

blade1 · 28-10-2017 12:43pm

Show her your ghoulies!

D3V!L · 28-10-2017 12:43pm

Burn her house down with her in it . If she survives shes a witch.

It's the only definitive test I know of.

bonzodog2 · 28-10-2017 12:46pm

The duck test is always a surefire way to tell

lazybones32 · 28-10-2017 12:52pm

Sephiroth_dude wrote: »

I wonder does there linen closet have a portal too the "other realm".

Zelda was a fox.

elperello · 28-10-2017 12:56pm

You must leave your house and never return.
I'll give you tree fiddy for it out of compassion.

WoollyRedHat · 28-10-2017 1:10pm

Sephiroth_dude wrote: »

I wonder does there linen closet have a portal too the "other realm".

I often hear thunder coming from next door now that you mention it.

Sephiroth_dude · 28-10-2017 1:26pm

WoollyRedHat wrote: »

I often hear thunder coming from next door now that you mention it.

Wouldn't be at all surprised if these fellows called too there door then what with Halloween next week and all......

Halloween carolers :eek:

sjb25 · 28-10-2017 1:41pm

WoollyRedHat wrote: »

Yes dear reader you read that correctly, I think my neighbour might be a real.. fire and brimstone witch. They have been exhibiting some suspicous signs for some time now but after reading the below link im now comvinced. .. especially the stray cat thing.

With halloween a few days away im afraid they might decide to eat the small children of the neighbourhood. What should i do.. confront them outright.. call a townhall meeting.. buy some pitchforks, or just move out of Salem?

http://turoks.net/Cabana/SignsThatYourNeighborMightBeAWitch.php

On the way OP

feargale · 28-10-2017 2:49pm

Go for the old tried and tested solution. Tie a stone to her and throw her into a lake. If she floats she's a witch. If she drowns you're ok - she's not a witch.