My period is late - worried

LegacyUser

My monthly cycle is regular. It is usually 28 days but sometimes it can be a day early or day late.

I should have been due my period in the days gone by but it still hasn't arrived. Taking 28 days as the cycle figure, I'm currently 3 days late. I was hoping to wake up to my period this morning but that hasn't happened. I sometimes spot before my period too but there is no spotting this morning either.

Now, I am getting worried. I bought a boots own brand pregnancy test and I tested yesterday but it came up negative.

I'm not trying for a baby. Boyfriend and I did the withdrawal method. We are not using any other contraception. The pill was never for me. I think the coil would be the most suitable for me but I couldn't afford it in recent months. This is still only a relatively new relationship for me. Going out 9 months so previous to this there was no need for contraception.

I'm nearly 34 and I'm not ready for a baby.

There is tremendous stress in my life right now. My job is a nightmare and my family is mess to say the least and not only that my father is sick in hospital. So I'm hoping it is stress playing havoc.

I have a morning off later in the week. Do you think I should make an appointment at the doctor if my period still hasn't arrived? To see one way or another if there is a pregnancy to deal with here or not?

retro:electro

Stress could be a factor in you being late. Withdrawing isn't a reliable method of contraception whatsoever and you can still get pregnant that way, so for someone who is trying to avoid getting pregnant you should be taking contraception.
Maybe book in with the doctor to do a proper test to settle your mind.

stuboy01

Do another test tomorrow, the margin for a double negative is minuscule, the doctor will just give you a test anyway. if you're really stressed in work it can put you off, even if you're regular as clockwork normally.

on a side note, the withdrawal method is no method at all.

Permabear

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Loveinapril

The shop bought tests are usually better than the GP test so just buy another test and do it with your first morning pee tomorrow. I agree with the other posters, the withdrawal method is not a preventative method of contraception. I have a friend currently expecting a baby after 'using' this method. The coil may be expensive but it's cheaper than a kid! Use condoms while you save up or get your boyfriend to go halves with you.

Owryan

If you're so worried about getting pregnant and the pill is a no go and you can't afford the coil why doesn't he wear a condom?

SusieBlue

I have a friend with a gorgeous little 2 year old boy who was conceived using the withdrawal method.

At three days late, your HCG levels (hormone that indicates pregnancy) would be sky high by now so if you were pregnant, you'd most likely have a very clear positive line on the test. You are probably late due to stress but maybe do another test tomorrow to confirm and put your mind to rest.

You also need to seriously consider proper contraception, its highly irresponsible to continue as you are so let this be your wake up call to get a more reliable method sorted.

pc7

If you aren't 100% sure when you ovulated you can't be sure you are late. Buy a first response early response test and do it tomorrow they are very sensitive. Don't waste €50 on doc visit unless you want to discuss contraception options or pregnancy options if you get a positive result. They use cheap tests that aren't that sensitive.
Also withdrawal method is very very risky if you don't want a baby

SteM

He might complain about a condom - ignore his complaints. If you don't want a child then ensure he does everything possible to ensure this can't happen. You're method of contraception is a lottery at the moment. Best of luck OP.

Neyite

This is your wake-up call OP and I mean that as kindly as I can.

You don't want to be pregnant and the timing would be terrible for you. Plus you are under enough stress already so throwing in the headwreck of an unplanned and unwanted pregnancy is nuts - why do that to yourself.

DO go to the doctor - even if you test tomorrow morning with another negative, still go. Using the worst and most unreliable form of birth control has to stop. Talk to the GP about your options. It's worth even getting a loan to fund getting the coil if you think it would suit you - that loan would be a damn sight less expensive than a termination or a baby. If it's your main form of contraception then he should help with the cost of it too - after all it benefits him as well.

I hope it's just stress that's knocked your cycle out of whack but you can't be doing this to yourself every 30 days.

Permabear

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Xterminator

When i was in school, the sex ed teacher cracked a joke.

"you know what the call people who use the withdrawal method? Parents."

Its not a form of contraception, its more akin to lucky roulette. OP pregnancy is far more expensive than contraception. You cant continue down that road, or the inevitable will happen.

RhubarbCrumble

OP, realistically I don't think there's any point in going to your GP purely to get a pregnancy test done. The ones you do yourself are every bit as reliable. Can I ask why you don't think the pill is for you? Have you been on it before and experienced problems? There are lots of different types so you might want to go to your GP and discuss contraception maybe, but there's no point in going purely for a test.
The withdrawl method really isn't a reliable form of contraception. Even if your boyfriend withdraws before coming, there's always a risk of pre ejaculate etc. Is he unwilling to use condoms?
Buy a twin pack of tests (Dunnes do them for about €3) I can't remember the brand but they are definitely reliable. My friend used them last year and they came up positive straight away. Do another test with these (first thing in the morning is the best time) and if it's still negative then it's highly unlikely that you're pregnant, but you really need to sort out contraception.

groovyg

Why haven't you insisted on your boyfriend wearing a condom? This is the second thread I've seen on somebody relying on the withdrawal method as a means of contraception, aside from just pregnancy are people not concerned about stds e.g. herpes, syphilis, gonorrhoea, chlamydia
Also don't waste your money going to the gp- go to the supermarket and buy a pregnancy test.

If you are so against having a baby then the following needs to happen-

1) You go on the pill
2) He uses a condom

One of these two has to be done. To be frank, there's no other way around it.

batmanrobin

Would echo what has already been said. Do buy another test just to reassure yourself.

Honestly, though, hearing that a 34 year old is not using any protection at all in a new relationship just boggles the mind! Seriously!! If the pill doesn't suit you, and you can't afford any of the other forms of contraceptives, then your BF wears a condom. Why isn't he???

If you can't afford contraceptives, you're really not going to be able to afford a baby!

Supercell

OP my wife is about the same age as your and went through something similar a couple of months ago. She is pretty regular and was 7 days late in the end, bottom line, if there isn't two lines by now you are almost certainly not pregnant. For what its worth the three times my wife was pregnant the First Response kit was earliest to show it and Clearblue the latest (by several days and yes she used both all three times to be sure to be sure like!).

shesty

There is a clearblue one that tells you that your are pregnant six days before your 'missed period' is due (a bit of a paradox).Go get that one.It says in the instructions that if you have even.the faintest of lines then yes you are pregnant.As you are past the due date I would think think that if any test will be right, that one will.
As for your contraceptive methods OP, in a relatively new relationship....really, they aren't going to end well.

LegacyUser

This is the OP. Thanks for all the replies. I was hoping my period would come on over the course of the day but it didn't. I bought a two pack of the first response test at lunch time for testing tonight and in the morning too. Coming home on the bus this evening, I felt the familiar monthly leak and sure enough when I got home and went to the toilet, there it was coming on. LOL. I'm delighted. Definitely a lottery I wanted to lose.

Wesser

You can get now get contraceptive pill ovreena only 11 euro for 6 months supply. Way cheaper than a baby!!!!

Teyla Emmagan

NO.AF wrote:

Definitely a lottery I wanted to lose.

Great. Now go and get some actual contraception or you may not be so lucky again. The withdrawal method is like playing Russian roulette.

LegacyUser

I recently went to the doctor to talk about becoming pregnant. I told him we'd been using the withdrawal method for the last year but had started trying properly in the last month.

He's sending me for fertility tests because he says there's a cause for concern that I haven't got pregnant even using the withdrawal method.

OP you're really playing with fire here.

Ursus Horribilis

Teyla Emmagan wrote: »

Great. Now go and get some actual contraception or you may not be so lucky again. The withdrawal method is like playing Russian roulette.

Exactly! I was shocked recently when I heard about how many Irish people use the withdrawal method as "contraception". If your boyfriend doesn't want to wear condoms, then let him chip in to help pay for another method.

RhubarbCrumble

Delighted to hear that it's worked out okay OP, but please PLEASE go and sort out contraception now, as you may not be so lucky next time.

alberto67

Great news OP. Now ride safely.

bellz_x

OP - you've only mentioned the pill and the coil, there are so many other contraceptive options out there for you.
I recently got the bar in, it's a progesterone only hormone, which may mess with your cycle but it's in place for 3 years, provided you wanted to keep it in that long but can be removed whenever you'd like.

Speaking of the withdrawal method, scientifically speaking, a woman cannot get pregnant just by a man's "pre-ejaculate" (trying to speak appropriately here) as this and his ejaculate both come from different 'tubes', but in saying that, and before anyone bites my head off, if a man has had an orgasm recently, there can still be some little wigglies floating around in there and can mix in with the pre-ejaculate fluid, possibly causing a pregnancy.

If you're really serious about not wanting a baby. Either tell him to suck it up and wear condoms or you go ahead and get yourself some contraception.
There is so much information online about the different options.

Best of luck.