who are you surprised by coming out?

Andy From Sligo

this is in no way meant to be a gay bashing thread , or dis-respectful to anyone's sexuality, I will start off by saying that and whatever people choose to do or who to love in their lives is their prerogative and its nobody elses business but their own

But is there anyone in the public eye be it someone well known on TV/Radio/Politician/sports star that you are surprised that they have come out as gay

I will say that I was surprised by a couple of people a politician and someone on TV (dont think I better name names) where they came out as gay and I just thought, I would never have known that or guessed that they was and when they come out it was just surprising is all. - this particular politician that has come out publically, if you were to say to me 'he is gay' and I hadnt heard him say on TV that he was gay I would go "no, really!"

Also I note that a lot of Gay people in other countries tend to have 'give-away signs' where you have no doubt of their sexuality in the way they speak, look and their mannerisms , their body language but I have noticed greatly in Ireland that an awful lot of Irish people that have come out (or maybe even some that havent come out publicly yet) dont seem to share those same mannerisms and quality, and I wonder why that is?

Breaston Plants

Andy from Sligo, the new Mint Aero.

tomwaterford

Graham norton

mikeoneilly

Enda Kenny

B.A._Baracus

I fall in the category of people who couldn't give a toss what sexuality someone is. Just couldn't care.
That said, I was shocked to learn that one of the biggest womanizers in the history of Hollywood was accordingly video recorded giving another man a bj.....and that man's name is Charlie Sheen.

I know, I know. Technically he didn't come out by choice. But still.

BettePorter

There's a lot more that 'came out as straight ' that surprises the f**k outta me tbh

Sinister Kid

I'm surprised my mate came out lastnight, she's always flaking on plans.

Noveight

"I'm coming out" - Diana Ross.

Fleawuss

TL;DR I'm not gay bashing but why haven't they all got limp wrists and a lisp like Carry on films?

Answer: Fcuk off OP.

dbagman

my mate dave. aint seen the prick in years. settled down early and had his kids in his early 20's. now he seems and says hes happy out and who am i to judge but by jaysus i near fell off me stool when he walked in the door of the local yesterday. I mean theres been rumours for years he was going to come out but no one really believed it. but there he stood yesterday as proud as any man iv ever seen to be out.And he even had permission from the mrs!!

JackTaylorFan

Well you kinda expect this kinda pig-ignorant **** from a third world country like Longford - but Sligo? I'm disappointed.

Also, Jeff Goldbum - I was totally shocked by that one.

endacl

Desperate Dan was a surprise to me.

Andy From Sligo

do you reckon there is still huge pressure (for some people) to announce that they are gay? - I mean you havent got the same kind of pressure on heterosexual people to come out as not being Gay - why is it such a big thing for others to goad people into coming out in public still it seems .. and why are papers and the media still so interested when someone comes out in the public eye? - its there in huge headlines on the front page or there on the TV news featuring in the headlines .. as long as it continues to be like this how can it ever be normalised? - and its not like its a new thing now

endacl

Andy From Sligo wrote: »

do you reckon there is still huge pressure (for some people) to announce that they are gay? - I mean you havent got the same kind of pressure on heterosexual people to come out as not being Gay - why is it such a big thing for others to goad people into coming out in public still it seems .. and why are papers and the media still so interested when someone comes out in the public eye? - its there in huge headlines on the front page or there on the TV news featuring in the headlines .. as long as it continues to be like this how can it ever be normalised? - and its not like its a new thing now

Do you feel pressure to come out as straight?

I was shocked when a good friend came out as straight. I just gave him a big hug and told him I would still be there for him.

Conor Bourke

JackTaylorFan wrote: »

Well you kinda expect this kinda pig-ignorant **** from a third world country like Longford - but Sligo? I'm disappointed.

Also, Jeff Goldbum - I was totally shocked by that one.

Woah woah woah. Andy lives in Sligo but he ain't one of us.

JackTaylorFan

Cornelius Crow wrote: »

Woah woah woah. Andy lives in Sligo but he ain't one of us.

Sorry, I like to make big sweeping generalisations about whole sections pf society - it saves time.

Andy From Sligo

endacl wrote: »

Do you feel pressure to come out as straight?

no, thats what I am getting at, if no pressure to come out as straight .. why this pressure for people in the public eye to come out as gay. I am all for if its helping them to feel better or come to terms with it or feel if it helps others. But why do the media judge their sexuality so much (or seem to?)

the_syco

Andy From Sligo wrote: »

Also I note that a lot of Gay people in other countries tend to have 'give-away signs' where you have no doubt of their sexuality in the way they speak, look and their mannerisms , their body language but I have noticed greatly in Ireland that an awful lot of Irish people that have come out (or maybe even some that havent come out publicly yet) dont seem to share those same mannerisms and quality, and I wonder why that is?

I think the mannerism is called "being camp"? Some gay people like it, some prefer the muscle bound sort. Each to their own.

So, this is a new low. Even for the OP.

Mountainsandh

Andy From Sligo wrote: »

no, thats what I am getting at, if no pressure to come out as straight .. why this pressure for people in the public eye to come out as gay. I am all for if its helping them to feel better or come to terms with it or feel if it helps others. But why do the media judge their sexuality so much (or seem to?)

Well I guess for politicians it is a bit relevant : a political figure's stance on some issues may be different depending on their personal situation. Or at least the public might feel that they might have a different stance on something so maybe the political figure wants to set the record straight.

Other than that, gossip, yeah !
I love the "coming out" gossip about celebs, same as I love gossip about new babies, or celebs homes, or how a celeb had a strop about something, or Justin B's flashing yet again, or weddings... Only read about all that at the doctor's though.

Your man the news anchor with the really white hair and really blue eyes, in the US, I'd never have thought he was gay. Oh actually, the lovely news guy here too, who got married recently enough, I wouldn't have suspected he was gay either. News anchor in general I guess, they're so neutral on screen.

Anderson Cooper, that's the guy.

Rackstar

Your man that does the news and say yes to the dress

D0NNELLY

Andy From Sligo wrote: »

I will say that I was surprised by a couple of people a politician and someone on TV (dont think I better name names)

Going to be a short thread so.. why do you ask posters who they were surprised by, but you won't name names yourself?

retro:electro

So you don't wanna name names but start a thread asking other people to name names..

Samuel T. Cogley

It surprises me when anyone 'comes out' and has done since about 2000 because who the **** cares?

endacl

Andy From Sligo wrote: »

I am all for if its helping them to feel better or come to terms with it

Read that bit back slowly to yourself. Any thoughts...?

JackTaylorFan

Also, I was shocked at Rock Hudson - I'm guessing this is an antiquated frame of reference OP will understand

Canis Lupus

I've never really cared.

B.A._Baracus

Samuel T. Cogley wrote: »

It surprises me when anyone 'comes out' and has done since about 2000 because who the **** cares?

Totally agree.
What I also don't get is people making youtube videos about coming out too

I get that coming out can be a big thing as you are coming out to friends, family and people you know. But making a video for strangers over the internet to watch?


Comes off as "LOOK AT ME... I'M GAY!" - Erm, yeah, we don't care.

Samuel T. Cogley

Samuel T. Cogley wrote: »

It surprises me when anyone 'comes out' and has done since about 2000 because who the **** cares?

I was thinking more like the late 1980s...but the same "who cares" sentiment applies...

Andy From Sligo

anna080 wrote:

So you don't wanna name names but start a thread asking other people to name names..

Yes it does seem strange when you put it like that, I will agree

Mountainsandh

Samuel T. Cogley wrote: »

It surprises me when anyone 'comes out' and has done since about 2000 because who the **** cares?

True. But for the people concerned it must be important. For friends and family I know it seemed to be important anyway. We didn't really care, but they did (so we kinda cared then because we want them to be happy of course).


OP mind your words, you don't seem to intend to, but you're putting it all wrong.

Samuel T. Cogley

Deleted User wrote: »

I was thinking more like the late 1980s...but the same "who cares" sentiment applies...

You're older than me :pac:

Joking aside I only moved here in 2001 so I can't really speak to Ireland but I felt there was still a stigma to it in the 90s in the UK. There was something in the way it was portrayed on TV. If it was a drama about a high ranking police officer or politician it was a secret to be kept. I suppose it was still an issue for the military then (IIRC) and of course it wasn't long after the height of the AIDS panic.

JackTaylorFan

Mountainsandh wrote: »

OP mind your words, you don't seem to intend to, but you're putting it all wrong.

Ah Bless.

Mountainsandh

JackTaylorFan wrote: »

Ah Bless.

What ? is there a joke I'm not getting ?

Samuel T. Cogley

Mountainsandh wrote: »

True. But for the people concerned it must be important. For friends and family I know it seemed to be important anyway. We didn't really care, but they did (so we kinda cared then because we want them to be happy of course).


OP mind your words, you don't seem to intend to, but you're putting it all wrong.

I understand where, privately it might be a big deal, even today in a conservative family. However I don't really understand why people feel the need to announce what they like doing with their genitalia. To me it makes no odds what sexual orientation a sports person/TV presenter etc. is. It certainly makes no difference to me if someone I've met through work or socially is bi/gay/straight/asexual or whatever.

If a long term friend 'came out' then perhaps it would mean something, but only that it was unfortunate that they didn't feel they could be who they were until now.

RabbleRouser2k

George Michael. Genuinely.

Didn't learn of Rock Hudson being gay for ages-but keep in mind, it was in the 00s when I found out.

Portia De Rossi-many a heterosexual male (myself included) was like 'seriously?-aw mannnn'. As if we had a chance there, even if she was straight.

Matt Bomer.

Neil Patrick HArris.

Kate McKinnon (see Portia De Rossi).

Allegedley-SHerman HElmsley. This one is still disputed.

MAddie Blaustein-Voice of Meowth.

RobertKK

All those gay porn stars who come out as not being gay...

JackTaylorFan

Mountainsandh wrote: »

What ? is there a joke I'm not getting ?

No, no joke. It's just, you remind me of my own dear mother, who only likes to see the good in people, no matter how big a gobahite they are

Mountainsandh

Samuel T. Cogley wrote: »

I understand where, privately it might be a big deal, even today in a conservative family. However I don't really understand why people feel the need to announce what they like doing with their genitalia. To me it makes no odds what sexual orientation a sports person/TV presenter etc. is. It certainly makes no difference to me if someone I've met through work or socially is bi/gay/straight/asexual or whatever.

If a long term friend 'came out' then perhaps it would mean something, but only that it was unfortunate that they didn't feel they could be who they were until now.

I don't think being gay is limited to what you do with your genitalia tbh. That's not a very nice way to put it either.

I don't know why the people I know who "came out" had to sort of make it official like that, but it was important to them. I don't think they weren't who they were either before they came out ?

Maybe they just would have held back on introducing a boy/girl friend pre-coming out, but it seems the only thing.

B.A._Baracus

RobertKK wrote: »

All those gay porn stars who come out as not being gay...

That reminds me of the Channel 4 documentary they did a while back :pac: (Maybe a year or two ago?)

Anyways, for those who never watched it, Channel 4 brought over a few brits to California. All of them love porn and the point was to show them the truth about the industry. One of which was a gay lad who practically loved this very famous Gay Porn Star.

So the gay lad meets the gay porn star. But yet the "gay porn star" isn't actually gay... he's straight He goes on to say that they will film him with another man, he'd be fully erect but yet when it came down to any touching, oral or sex another gay porn star (Stunt-cock :pac: ) would step in and take his place. They simply film a few reaction shots and edit them in.

you should have seen the gay brit guy's face lol. It just dropped.

RabbleRouser2k

RabbleRouser2k wrote: »

Matt Bomer.

Kate McKinnon

Allegedley-SHerman HElmsley. This one is still disputed.

MAddie Blaustein-Voice of Meowth.

I'm more concerned about who are they at all, rather than their sexuality once I find out who they are at all...

Mountainsandh

JackTaylorFan wrote: »

No, no joke. It's just, you remind me of my own dear mother, who only likes to see the good in people, no matter how big a gobahite they are

Yeah. I guess I'm turning into a bit of an Irish Mammy alright.
I didn't want to be insulting to OP, but he/she comes across as a harmless big eejit who'll put their foot in it, like.

yerwanthere123

Samuel T. Cogley wrote: »

It surprises me when anyone 'comes out' and has done since about 2000 because who the **** cares?

Coming out is still a big deal for a lot of people. It's great that you are so accepting of gay people, but unfortunately not everyone, even in 2017, feels the same way. Gay men and women have only enjoyed equality in Ireland for less than two years, and remember almost 38% of those who voted tried to stop them enjoying these rights, so it stands to reason why people might still feel anxious about coming out.

Noddyholder

There is a lady on another thread who unfortunally got her phone robbed and said she is never coming out again...

freshpopcorn

To answer you question nobody really OP. Out of people I went to school with I generally knew if people were gay or not once we were around 12+. One person always denied it and he came out a few years ago. Same with my college class. It was fairly obvious from day one. My brother is gay and that didn't really surprise me when he came out.
Out celebrities generally I wasn't overly surprised. I know a few people were surprised with Donal Og Cusack but from my understanding everybody who knew him personally knew it.

Samuel T. Cogley

yerwanthere123 wrote: »

Coming out is still a big deal for a lot of people. It's great that you are so accepting of gay people, but unfortunately not everyone, even in 2017, feels the same way. Gay men and women have only enjoyed equality in Ireland for less than two years, and remember almost 38% of those who voted tried to stop them enjoying these rights, so it stands to reason why people might still feel anxious about coming out.

That was marriage equality. There's still loads of straight people who's family is given less constitution protection than their married counterparts. Ireland is just freakin' odd in a lot of ways.

There will always be idiots that don't like someone because they're different somehow. But I still have to push back on people being defined by their sexuality. I absolutely understand that parents might need to be handled, expecting grand kids or whatever, but I've rarely being introduced to someone and their sexuality been very high up on the agenda.

I just don't see the need for gay people to come out. Coming out only really underscores the notion that it's somehow unnatural or abnormal, it's not. I don't see people queuing up to announce their heterosexuality.

yerwanthere123

Samuel T. Cogley wrote: »

That was marriage equality. There's still loads of straight people who's family is given less constitution protection than their married counterparts. Ireland is just freakin' odd in a lot of ways.

There will always be idiots that don't like someone because they're different somehow. But I still have to push back on people being defined by their sexuality. I absolutely understand that parents might need to be handled, expecting grand kids or whatever, but I've rarely being introduced to someone and their sexuality been very high up on the agenda.

I just don't see the need for gay people to come out. Coming out only really underscores the notion that it's somehow unnatural or abnormal, it's not. I don't see people queuing up to announce their heterosexuality.

What 'coming out' are we talking about here though? Is someone mentioning the fact that they're gay in a conversation "announcing" their homosexuality? Seems to me that a lot of people (not you) will tolerate gay people, but only to a certain degree. Kinda like they're ok that you're gay, just don't be shouting about it either and keep it to yourself. I've never seen a gay couple in Ireland be affectionate with each other in public outside of a big city.

Rekop dog

He hasn't publicly but Roger Federer was a surprise.

yerwanthere123

Rekop dog wrote: »

He hasn't publicly but Roger Federer was a surprise.

Been reading tennis forum have we?

Outlaw Pete

Was shocked last week when I read that Paul Burrell had came out as gay.


































Said nobody anywhere....

...but I'm with B.A. ... who the hell cares these days anyway.