one night stand Scared and have wicked anxiety

vanseil

Hi thanks for reading,
About 6 weeks ago i had unprotected sex with a African female she is a college student ever since i have had bad anxiety and waking up nearly shaking over the stigma with hiv and Africans don't mean it in racist way some my good mates are black and so from different country's had a test a 3 weeks mark came back neg for sti and everything else blood work,book in again for the 9 week mark soon the wait is killing me id like to know if anyone else ever have this experience before its really draining me to the point off not getting out bed .

zoobizoo

Chances of her having HIV - low

Chances of catching HIV from her - low

silverharp

I'd say you are panicking unduly , you didn't give much detail but either she is from a well to do family if she is here as a foreign student or she hasn't lived in Africa for some time then she ought not have a higher risk than normal. You are clearly both foolish having unprotected sex so let the worry be a learning lesson for the future.

Big Bag of Chips

Aside from the fact you had unprotected sex and may have caught/transmitted an STD, you don't seem to be considering the fact that she might be pregnant?

vanseil

Silverharp Don't know much about her,,but did look at her facebook and seen she been here a good couple of years,,thanks for reply ,,No pregnant would be impossible i didn't come near to injaculation

Taltos

OP there is a thing called pre-ejeculate. You don't have to come in order to introduce semen into the game. Pregnancy might be slim but its still a possibility.

Colonel_McCoy

Just go to the the clinic

LegacyUser

vanseil wrote: »

Silverharp Don't know much about her,,but did look at her facebook and seen been her a good couple of years,,thanks for reply ,,No pregnant would be impossible i didn't come near to injaculation

If you put your penis anywhere near her vagina then pregnancy is a possibility regardless of wither you ejaculated or not - it's very low but not impossible.

vanseil

I did pal at 3 weeks everything came back ok have go again in 2 weeks didn't get the flu that's common with it but have joint pain in my knees that's driving my Anxiety mad i have not been taking to anyone in days over it

vanseil

vanseil wrote: »

Silverharp Don't know much about her,,but did look at her facebook and seen she been here a good couple of years,,thanks for reply ,,No pregnant would be impossible i didn't come near to injaculation

I'm sorry, but you really need to read up about how pregnancy actually occurs. As Taltos mentioned, you don't have to actually ejaculate for sperm/semen to be introduced. It is slim, but can happen.

Rekop dog

I'd say if she's a student and sexually active she's probably on the pill so pregnancy slim possibility, still very silly for you not to wear protection.

I think you're unduly worrying because of her race, but hopefully this scare will be enough to be more careful next time.

vanseil

True and its wrong off me because off race because racist people make me sick

vanseil

thanks i will be a lot more careful

Lux23

vanseil wrote: »

True and its wrong off me because off race because racist people make me sick

Ah listen, don't beat yourself up about that just learn from this fear and rubber up in future.

TheAnalyst_

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/HIV/AIDS_in_Africa#/media/File:HIV_in_Africa_2011.svg

The chances that she has HIV are actually quite high so you're right to be worried.

silverharp

TheAnalyst_ wrote: »

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/HIV/AIDS_in_Africa#/media/File:HIV_in_Africa_2011.svg

The chances that she has HIV are actually quite high so you're right to be worried.

doest really apply to this situation though, it was established that the girl has lived in Ireland for some time so probably spend her teenage years here. Those stats are for adults living in Africa so the chances are not "actually quite high". no point freaking out the op eh!

Sad that some posters seem intent on adding to the ops anxiety
He has clearly stated he does not feel like getting out of bed due to it
He came on here worried about hiv, and people are hell bent on making him think about pregnancy. Give the guy a break. There is a time and place

Op, you have done the right thing by getting tested
Follow your clinic's advice until you are given the all clear
As other people have said, use this fear to make better choices in the future
don't google hiv and don't let it consume you until you get the all clear, you will only make yourself sick and this will in turn make you believe you have symptoms.
Get the follow up test and forget about it as best you can


All the best

LegacyUser

Hi OP,

Am a very normal woman. But like you, made a mistake a few years ago re: unprotected sex with a person in a higher risk category (Thai). And it really didnt help later when he told me he'd had sex with prostitutes. And on my way home from there, I actually was pretty sick.

Anyways, I've been through all the tests. Negative thank God (Its about 4 years ago and when I go for a blood test, I still ask for HIV one!). So I completely understand your mind set and where its coming from.

What I had to reason with myself was, I did something stupid. Learned from that. And then, I had to learn not to worry about it (stay in the present) until all blood tests were done. I resolved with myself, there was no point in worrying myself to dead over something that may not happen. I couldnt control if something was wrong. So, I decided to stay in a positive mind set, until I knew there was acutally something to worry about.

Ursus Horribilis

I don't think most of the posters on this thread were intent on adding to the OP's anxiety. If you're old enough to have sex, then you're are also grown up enough to know that it comes with risks. Using a condom is the very least anyone should do when they're having sex and don't want pregnancy or STIs. If nothing else, this thread will have taught him that pre-ejaculate contains sperm and that putting an unprotected penis anywhere near a vagina is a pregnancy risk. He clearly didn't have a conversation with her about contraception either before getting down to business. I bet he will in the future so there's a win there.

OP, if you're still anxious about this, perhaps the best thing to do is make contact with the clinic where you had the tests done. Or indeed, any other STI clinic. Part of what's driving you up the walls here is the terror of the unknown. If you speak to someone in those clinics, they will have plenty of useful information and answers for you. Maybe you need to talk to a counsellor in there? Ring a clinic up and have a chat. It's a hell of a lot more constructive than lying in bed, terrified out of your mind. Even if you are unlucky enough to contract HIV, it is not the death sentence it was back in the 1980s. With the medication there is out there now, people can live normal, healthy lives. That's a bridge to cross if you come to it. It might never happen.

vanseil

Thanks very much for the comments and advice ,,its just the knee pain got me anxiety going,, i have put my self in isolation now ,,and today have tiny pain me neck like that swollen lymph nodes is a symptom off hiv this ain't healthy my mind is gone i'm gonna have to sort this.thank again for your comments

vanseil

Deleted User wrote: »

Sad that some posters seem intent on adding to the ops anxiety
He has clearly stated he does not feel like getting out of bed due to it
He came on here worried about hiv, and people are hell bent on making him think about pregnancy. Give the guy a break. There is a time and place

Op, you have done the right thing by getting tested
Follow your clinic's advice until you are given the all clear
As other people have said, use this fear to make better choices in the future
don't google hiv and don't let it consume you until you get the all clear, you will only make yourself sick and this will in turn make you believe you have symptoms.
Get the follow up test and forget about it as best you can


All the best

i already have pal belive i have symptoms

Dial Hard

vanseil wrote:

i already have pal belive i have symptoms

I'm not really sure what it is you want from this thread? There's nothing anyone here can tell you that will make any difference, you seem to have yourself convinced that you've contracted HIV, all you can do now is wait for the results of your follow-up test.

TheAnalyst_

Unfortunately you'll have to wait 6 months or more before you can even get tested.

TheAnalyst_

TheAnalyst_ wrote: »

Unfortunately you'll have to wait 6 months or more before you can even get tested.

3 months is the window

Op just remember, all the symptoms are common symptoms, that you have probably experienced many times in your life. You are worrying yourself physically sick, this is a common reaction

Do you still have contact with the girl? She may be going through the exact same fear as you right now. Wouldn't hurt to talk if you are still in contact

try forget about it. Assume you are 100% healthy

zoobizoo

vanseil wrote: »

Thanks very much for the comments and advice ,,its just the knee pain got me anxiety going,, i have put my self in isolation now ,,and today have tiny pain me neck like that swollen lymph nodes is a symptom off hiv this ain't healthy my mind is gone i'm gonna have to sort this.thank again for your comments

Dude... please try and relax.


Reminds me of years ago when I was in India and had a cut on my foot while walking around some paths that were used by locals to **** on.

I opened up the Lonely Planet to read the Health Section and had convinced myself twenty minutes later that I had Typhoid, Cholera and every other disease that was in there. I had caught nothing.

Your knee pain etc are probably pains you get all the time but now that you think it's AIDS related, the pain becomes more prominent.

Go to your GP, get some anti anxiety advice from him.

LegacyUser

You've a choice how you deal with this.

Choose to believe everything is ok and live your life and IF (big if) something happens deal with it then.

Or cripple yourself with fear.

I remember too thinking every aliment/little ailment I had was related. And I had to stop for my own sanity.

And if you dont mind me saying, my situation (as per above) was much worse than yours.

Could she have it? Yes. The likeliness of her having it? Very small.

Ursus Horribilis

vanseil wrote: »

Thanks very much for the comments and advice ,,its just the knee pain got me anxiety going,, i have put my self in isolation now ,,and today have tiny pain me neck like that swollen lymph nodes is a symptom off hiv this ain't healthy my mind is gone i'm gonna have to sort this.thank again for your comments

Do you have anxiety issues? If so, it's time to go see your GP. From what I can see, isolating yourself is simply making yourself even sicker. There is nothing you can do about potential STIs until the results come back. But there is plenty you can do about your anxiety and that's what you'd be better off focusing on now.