Drop in centres for socialising

Greaney

Hello Folks, I've a sister who has acquired brain injury. Socially, she's grand, but she can no longer work. I'm wondering, is there anything like a 'drop in' center, or day time hours group that meets. She cannot work and desperately needs social stimulation. I've signed her up to a course two days a week (Quest, wonderful) and we made her join the local Choir (she's an alto and loves it) but she needs more. Three days a week she's nothing to do and is very bored.

All her old friends either work or don't live locally anymore and she is really at a loss for things to do. I don't want to sign her up for more stuff and I'm wondering if there's something a bit more casual. Something like the 'Open Door Coffee' days in the United Methodist Presbyterian Church may be ideal!! By the way, I'm totally game for attending myself the odd time, I wouldn't shove her into a socially awkward situation randomly or anything;)

GalwayGrrrrrl

Is she linked in with Ability west? They seem fairly active in getting clients out and about. They mainly deal with intellectual disability but they might be able to point you in the right direction if their service isn't suitable. http://www.abilitywest.ie/?q=content/services#Adult%20Day%20Services

If your sister is interested in another choir, Ignite Gospel Choir in St Josephs church are very welcoming and have loads of social activities.

Mrs OBumble

There are walking groups in various places and i think most are informal.

The one area i know about is from the Family resource centre now in Cumasu centre in Doughiska ... but im sure there are others.

They have other groups from there too, eg women's circle, which might suit.

Greaney

Thank you for that, I'm looking for day time drop in groups because she has to use a travel card and Irish public transport can get tricky in the evenings. She's pretty independent so I don't know how she'd feel about being with adults with intellectual disabilities. ABI (Acquired brain damage) means you're socially copped on, you just have difficulties with short term memory... how shall I put this... she may be insulted if I recommended her to a group with folk with intellectual disabilities.

Mrs OBumble

Thinking some more ... there are some ABI support organisations around. I presume she's getting assistance from one of these? Even if she's not actively on their books any more, maybe they have ideas about other things she could do? From memory, there's one with a base in Liosbaun somewhere.

Another place to try is Vincent de Paul's Croi na Gaillmhe centre in Mill St: http://croinagaillimhe.ie/about-us/
I'm pretty sure they have some drop-in type activities, not sure what age group for.

That said .. adults (ie not elderly people) with acquired disabilities often do have a hard time finding things to do: there are relatively few of them and they have different needs, so tend to be not that many services for them. Most of the daytime activities (especially free/cheap ones) are for mothers at home with kids, people who are older, or people who have lifelong disabilities - and as you say, acquired-disability people don't always fit in so well.

Would she be capable for any volunteer work at all? eg sorting clothes for one of the charity shops? That might not be so good on a drop-in basis though ...

Mmmm ... will keep thinking ...

Greaney

Oh Chroí na Gaillimhe looks great. It looks really interesting, and the intergenerational mix may really challange her. Thank you for that. She's attending Quest (the Liosbán service) two days a week. She's re-learning skills there, and they're terrific. It's not casual mind, I was a good while trying to get her a place there and highly recommend the National learning Network, which is the program she's on. It's been amazing and when she has a day off (and she's only there two days a week as it is).... she really is lost. It will only last a few years, so I'd love to prepare her for that with a larger network of both friends, acquaintances and activities

I've been pondering on voluntary work for a while, she's pretty limited. I have a wee community Arts group in our village and I roped her into that the odd time but I think she'd rather something of her own. These answers have given me real food for thought, and indeed, I've checked a few out. Thank you so much, and do keep them coming because I think, as you said Mrs OBumble, there's a real gap for folk who don't quiet fit in.

Whereisgalway

Greaney wrote: »

Thank you for that, I'm looking for day time drop in groups because she has to use a travel card and Irish public transport can get tricky in the evenings. She's pretty independent so I don't know how she'd feel about being with adults with intellectual disabilities. ABI (Acquired brain damage) means you're socially copped on, you just have difficulties with short term memory... how shall I put this... she may be insulted if I recommended her to a group with folk with intellectual disabilities.

The people with 'intellectual disabilities' would be more insulted

Greaney

Look, you don't need to take a dig at me, or the sister. I started this thread to look for help. I've become a full time carer of both my sister and her child so steady on with the cheap shots. Firstly, you don't know all the details of my sisters condition. The Adults with learning disabilities that I work with are more thick skinned and 'game' than my sister actually. Many folk with ABI are often frustrated by the limitations that have arrived in their life. Furthermore, they can smell the teeniest whiff of condescension a mile off. If I say that I believe Ability West is not suitable, trust me, it's not. No need to get snarky.

Whereisgalway

Greaney wrote: »

Look, you don't need to take a dig at me, or the sister. I started this thread to look for help. I've become a full time carer of both my sister and her child so steady on with the cheap shots. Firstly, you don't know all the details of my sisters condition. The Adults with learning disabilities that I work with are more thick skinned and 'game' than my sister actually. Many folk with ABI are often frustrated by the limitations that have arrived in their life. Furthermore, they can smell the teeniest whiff of condescension a mile off. If I say that I believe Ability West is not suitable, trust me, it's not. No need to get snarky.

I empathise with you I really do, can't be anything but tough, ever person I know (including close relatives of mine)with a learning disability weather mild, moderate or severe is frustrated by limitations and want nothing more than to be included as a ever day part of society. Ability west, brother of charity, enable, rehab care all have groups that are needs driven, person centred that help people with ABI, learning disabilities, autistic and a range of other needs

LucyBliss

I am wondering if volunteering with Irish Girl Guides would be something she would be interested in. Most units do meet one evening a week but if there was a unit close by, it might mean she didn't have to travel to the city? The thing about guiding is that we're open to girls and women of all abilities, etc. and we work with people to know how to best support them so that they can be a part of the organisation. An adult can be a unit helper or a full leader, and there are three different age branches (5-7/7-10/10-14).
Of course if your sister is all "nah, not wrangling a bunch of kids one evening a week!" that's cool too! ;-)

I'm actively involved in guiding, both locally and nationally, and I found it extremely beneficial to my state of mind when I went back to it after being ill and going through major surgery. Not just the weekly meetings but also the social aspect of meeting other leaders at different events. Plus, at the same time I went back, I was my grandmother's carer so I get where you're coming from and I also get your sister's frustration at the change in her life.

Whatever she does, I wish your sister all the best!

Mrs OBumble

I've had another thought - it's summertime only, but there are community gardens around the place (Ballybane, Doughiska, Shantalla, Tirellan) and I think most have drop in type days for doing work.

Also you could go through the list of Meetup groups in Galway, to see if any suit her interests.

I was thinking about the overall problem - finding a wider network of people who aren't working in the daytime is really quite difficult: People who are looking to meet new friends will usually be those who have moved here - but meeting a bunch of blow-ins, many of whom will blow-out again soon enough, won't actually build her a long term network. (And I say that as a blow-in who's stuck around for 10 years - I never imagined that I'd be here for so long, and especially at first, I met a lot of people who have left again). I don't have any solutions to get over it - but it's worth keeping mind that the goal is long term connections, not just short term keeping-busyness.

One option that occurred to me was for her to form connections in some local businesses - maybe arranging flowers for reception areas or something small that she could do as an excuse for dropping in for a short time once a week. It would take local connections to get agreements for this sort of thing. But businesses might actually be more open to it than community/voluntary groups who would likely be more paranoid about safeguarding risks (for both her and their other members/staff).

the_syco

Greaney wrote: »

She cannot work and desperately needs social stimulation.

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

But businesses might actually be more open to it than community/voluntary groups who would likely be more paranoid about safeguarding risks (for both her and their other members/staff).

In regards the "cannot work" bit; are there any skills that she has from working that she could use in a volunteer capacity? Maybe an hour one day, an hour another day, so she'd get the social stimulation, and the organisation gets maybe a qualified person to help them out.

_Whimsical_

There's a facebook group called GirlCrew Galway with nearly 2000 members intended for women who want to connect with new female friends for activities. I have to say now, I haven't tried it but I know a few girls who have found it good for getting a few girls together for hobby groups like people into yoga, knitting, book club etc.
I'm sure there must be girls and women out there who'd love to meet for coffee with a group once a week in the daytime. Maybe you could try setting something up there.

This is the link https://www.facebook.com/groups/girl.crew.galway/?ref=br_tf

Mrs OBumble

I saw this sign in st nicholas church on the weekend and thought of you.

I know its for last Thursday but am guessing its the sort of thing which meets regularly.

No idea what they're like or what age group ...

Greaney

Thank you for all these replies, I'm going to follow some up. Ironically, with regard to work, she's only really got her pre-ABI skills left.... She was a wine sommilier, so she can recommend a good bottle of vino!! I've toyed with volunteer stuff like scouts, so I'm delighted to hear guides may have a place. The St. Nicks post looks interesting too.... indeed, maybe I want to go there... She suprised me last week by tottering into the United Methodist/Presbyterian church for their coffee morning, but it wasn't open, so she said she'd try again!

This has challenged me to look at things folk can do like 'board game' morning/afternoons and such.