Moved to IE and now overwhelmed

LirW

Hello there!

I guess I need some advice from the internet people here.

I'm 25, I'm not from Ireland (EU-national) and moved to Ireland a few months ago with my Irish boyfriend. We were living in my country for a while before deciding to pack and move to Ireland.

So I instantly got involved in the job market here, had some interviews for some support roles in my language and then a big surprise: Boom I'm pregnant (a year or two earlier than planned). But we are pleasantly surprised and are very much looking forward to meet the little poop. Unfortunately I had to battle severe medical problems since I found out I'm pregnant so I dropped the job search, we are managing quite okay like that.

The thing is: Back home I had a job I really loved, but since 2015 I know that the business is closing doors by the end of 2016 and my job will be gone by then, which was one of the reasons why moving wasn't too hard for me.
I worked in a small restoration business, and especially in the last 2 years I had to work a lot with technical details and building regulations etc.(should clarify I was basically doing in-house work, so paperwork and more paperwork) I know it's a very specific thing.

Now my partner is going back to work and I have to kill a lot of time. I did get a bit more into my old hobbies again but I realised a couple of things:
First I do miss my job a lot. I loved working in that whole field.
Since I do have quite a bit of time now I was thinking of educating myself in my prior field a lot more but orientating myself new. I'd like to get into something counselling but within my field I already have experience in. With that idea in mind I realised the next thing: I'm very overwhelmed with how different it everything is here - the clocks are ticking differently (no surprise but I guess that is something you face when you move abroad). I'm struggling with finding out what my options are. What is expected, what can I realistically bring that benefits me. I just don't want to drown in boredom and keep the brain busy. I'm going to stay at home with my little one for a while but I can't imagine being a stay at home forever, I probably would go miserable. I'm willing to learn a lot and work hard but right now I just feel like I'm lost in a jungle.

I probably also should get out a lot more among people, I just recently joined a Dublin facebook group or two but as someone who's suffering from the baby flu I'm just a bit intimidated, probably it's a bit paired with me being a bit overwhelmed with everything being new.
Don't get me wrong, I really enjoy being here, it's just the acclimatizing that's a bit hard for me at the moment.

Every piece of advice is highly appreciated

porsche boy

Regarding your interest in your job. After you have your baby I would go to your local Fas office and see what courses are available in that field. There is also a posability that there is a qualification in that area or similar that would benifit you in searching for a job. Good luck.

loup

Try and have a look around your area for parent and toddler groups, even if you have no baby yet it's a great way to meet people. Is there a community centre near you? These often have great classes eg pregnancy yoga. Join a book club! If you really want to go back to training you can check online where is best to go locally. What part of Dublin are you in?

LirW

loup wrote: »

Try and have a look around your area for parent and toddler groups, even if you have no baby yet it's a great way to meet people. Is there a community centre near you? These often have great classes eg pregnancy yoga. Join a book club! If you really want to go back to training you can check online where is best to go locally. What part of Dublin are you in?

I'm in the north of D9. I had a look around for any workshops, there may be one or another I could imagine to do.
When it comes to mom/toddler groups I have terrible prejudice because where I come from they do have some very... particular reputations. But I probably should just give it a shot I guess. When I was sitting in the cafe of the Botanic Gardens today there were 2 of these groups around, so it seems like people do like to hang out like that here. I guess clenching my buttcheeks together and overcome what I'm used to from home would be a good advice for me :rolleyes:

Do you think I'd would make sense seeking advice for my further education/career is something I can do before the baby is here? Because that will definitely keep me quite occupied I guess.

Cakerbaker

Something like pregnancy yoga or other pregnancy fitness classes are good because the people you meet there will be going through the same things you are and will also be around to meet up after you've had your babies. Mother and baby groups are great (I'd try to find a baby one rather than a toddler one at the start of possible seeing as that's the stage you'll be at first but toddler ones would be great if there's no baby specific ones). If you ring your local health centre they should have details of these. These groups are very much part and parcel of Irish life and people attend from all walks of life. If you're planning on breast feeding there are some groups who run support groups (ciudiu and la Leche league are 2 but there may be others in your area). pregnant women who're planning to breast feed can go to their meet ups before having their babies.

LirW

Thank you, yes I already heard about that. It's good to know that it all runs a bit different here. The hospital put a note in my booklet to book me in for breastfeeding classes anyway, might check that out at when I meet the midwife.

Where I come from these baby groups are pretty much a get-together of elite-mommies, knowing everything best, if you're not agreeing with them they'd pretty much curse you and they have quite a bad reputation, so this might be the reason where my reservation comes from. But I'll definitely give it a shot.
Nontheless, I'd like to do something beside everything baby-related, something for "myself" if you know what I mean

meeeeh

LirW wrote: »

Thank you, yes I already heard about that. It's good to know that it all runs a bit different here. The hospital put a note in my booklet to book me in for breastfeeding classes anyway, might check that out at when I meet the midwife.

Where I come from these baby groups are pretty much a get-together of elite-mommies, knowing everything best, if you're not agreeing with them they'd pretty much curse you and they have quite a bad reputation, so this might be the reason where my reservation comes from. But I'll definitely give it a shot.
Nontheless, I'd like to do something beside everything baby-related, something for "myself" if you know what I mean

The one I've been to was mostly new mothers who wanted some company and maybe exchange some experiences. It was lovely. I felt welcome and I am not exactly mothering type.

I remember standing in fron of hot press and crying when I was taking out clothes to iron. The atm just swallowed my card after I typed the number wrong, it was lovely bank holiday Saturday and my partner was working. Again. And I felt so alone. That was after 5 months living in Ireland. But it gets easier with time, you get to know people, you settle into routine. Give it some time but it would be no harm to find some course to do because ontherwise you will be bored.

Wompa1

LirW wrote: »

Thank you, yes I already heard about that. It's good to know that it all runs a bit different here. The hospital put a note in my booklet to book me in for breastfeeding classes anyway, might check that out at when I meet the midwife.

Where I come from these baby groups are pretty much a get-together of elite-mommies, knowing everything best, if you're not agreeing with them they'd pretty much curse you and they have quite a bad reputation, so this might be the reason where my reservation comes from. But I'll definitely give it a shot.
Nontheless, I'd like to do something beside everything baby-related, something for "myself" if you know what I mean

I was wondering what you meant. Other moms can be very judgemental, alright! Not unique to Ireland or your home country by any means. I'm in the US, it's the same over here.

It's a cliche for sure BUT once your baby arrives, everything will change. It's a good idea to keep up work for your own sanity but the way you feel now will likely be very different in a few months. It takes a lot of persuading for my wife to go out and do something for herself. She prefers to be with our son.

We bring our son to swimming classes and music classes for 3 months+

There's no judgment going on and we don't really converse with other parents. It's more about the experience with your kid and teaching them. I enjoy bringing him swimming so much that it's also something for me.