Lost soul

Cc17

I'm writing on this Because I don't know what to do and I have no one to talk to. I have 3 kids am 24 and have been with my partner for 6 years. The last few years we have been making each other Miserable we fight and argue constantly all day every day very badly and sometimes in front of the children which I hate. I am so down and depressed of being mentally abused every day (I'm no angel) but we both have names on our house and he won't leave. I love him obviously but not in the same way but I'm scared of being on my own with 3 kids I don't know if I could mentally cope I know he is only staying because he Dosent want a broken home he's told me before we hardly sleep together or even in the same bed at all please can anyone give me friendly advice I'm stuck in a bad rut and see no way out. I can't take it much longer .. And thank you to whoever reads this my heart just hurts so bad

Stheno

OP I've moved this thread to Relationship issues as I think it is a more appropriate forum for you to get the advice you need.

Best of luck


New charter applies.

minikin

Have you been to counselling as a couple?

Cc17

minikin wrote: »

Have you been to counselling as a couple?

No never but I don't even know if that's an option but I might even suggest it I can't even really think straight just so down but thank you for that suggestion

minikin

You sound overwhelmed, you're only 24 with three kids... that would be a massive undertaking with the full support of a partner.

You need to create options, (be it counselling or otherwise), in order to see some light at the end of the tunnel. Then you might not see things so black and white... life is full of shades of grey. Things may be rocky now with your partner but that doesn't mean it's not recoverable, if that's what you both want.

Stop thinking of yourself as a lost soul, lift your chin up so you can see the signposts back to where you want to be.

Wesser

Sorry to hear you have gotten in to difficulty, I hope you are able to get some counselling together, whatever you do make sure you get reliable contraception eg mirena coil otherwise things could get worse....

Cc17

Wesser wrote: »

Sorry to hear you have gotten in to difficulty, I hope you are able to get some counselling together, whatever you do make sure you get reliable contraception eg mirena coil otherwise things could get worse....

That's a really really rude thing to say shame on you and I take offence to that.

Wesser

I'm sorry if I have offended you but you did come here for advice. You already stated yourself that you are afraid that you will not be able to cope with three kids on your own. Four would be worse. I know from my own experience. I'm just offering practical advice.

I'm hoping that you and your partner will be able to get some counselling and hopefully repair things. Wishing you all the best.

Cc17

Wesser wrote: »

I'm sorry if I have offended you but you did come here for advice. You already stated yourself that you are afraid that you will not be able to cope with three kids on your own. Four would be worse. I know from my own experience. I'm just offering practical advice.

I'm hoping that you and your partner will be able to get some counselling and hopefully repair things. Wishing you all the best.

Well thanks but I'm a grown woman I've already taken care in the hope of never having any more kids I know what you meant sorry I just took it up wrong. I know you probably didn't mean it in a bad way thank you.

Cc17

minikin wrote: »

You sound overwhelmed, you're only 24 with three kids... that would be a massive undertaking with the full support of a partner.

You need to create options, (be it counselling or otherwise), in order to see some light at the end of the tunnel. Then you might not see things so black and white... life is full of shades of grey. Things may be rocky now with your partner but that doesn't mean it's not recoverable, if that's what you both want.

Stop thinking of yourself as a lost soul, lift your chin up so you can see the signposts back to where you want to be.

Thank you for your very kind and honest words I feel a bit better now.

LegacyUser

Hey op.

If you are arguing and making each other miserable constantly all day every day then something needs to change quickly. I see two options, speaking from my own experience.

1 - Get some counselling together, try and fix your relationship and make it work if theres any chance of that.

2 - Separate. Im a 29 year old guy with 3 kids and I separated 2 years from my partner now. Before the separation i couldnt have imagined a life living apart, and its the last thing i ever wanted for my kids. But if you are not happy and things are miserable then its best for both of you - and the kids involved.

The most important thing is that you've got 3 healthy kids to take care of together.
Try and get out of the house as much as you can with the kids. Avoid constant interaction and conflict. Go visit family and friends to avoid the constant conflict you mentioned.

I hope things work out ok - best of luck and take care. Look after yourself.