If you won't parent you child, this lady will parent you!

Smondie

This is great. This lady runs a cafe. She gives the parents 5 lenient minutes before steping in and disciplining the child for them.


Too many parents oblivious to the chaos thier little darlings cause. A lot of parents used to other people discliping thier children (at creche) seem to think it's not thier place to parent thier own children.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3698451/SARAH-VINE-s-wrong-strangers-telling-noisy-kids-Parents-barely-exercise-discipline-lives-let-children-s.html

Mod-Fixed link.

corner of hells

Smondie wrote: »

This is great. This lady runs a cafe. She gives the parents 5 lenient minutes before steping in and disciplining the child for them.


Too many parents oblivious to the chaos thier little darlings cause. A lot of parents used to other people discliping thier children (at creche) seem to think it's not thier place to parent thier own children.

dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3698451/SARAH-VINE-s-wrong-strangers-telling-noisy-kids-Parents-barely-exercise-discipline-lives-let-children-s.html

Where's the cafe and mine are teenagers ?

Smondie

corner of hells wrote: »

Where's the cafe and mine are teenagers ?

Surely they know at this stage how to behave themselves in a cafe?

If not, you have failed as a parent

jigglypuffstuff

"They can barely exercise discipline in their own lives, let alone that of their offspring"

Interesting comment

andekwarhola

Fairly ingenious method for indulging in S&M with random kids.

lollpop

Why doesn't she speak to the parents instead of addressing the kids directly? She has no idea what may or may not be going on, her first point of contact should be the parents.

corner of hells

Smondie wrote: »

Surely they know at this stage how to behave themselves in a cafe?

If not, you have failed as a parent

I was kinda hoping I could leave them there and go drinking.

ohnonotgmail

Smondie wrote: »

This is great. This lady runs a cafe. She gives the parents 5 lenient minutes before steping in and disciplining the child for them.


Too many parents oblivious to the chaos thier little darlings cause. A lot of parents used to other people discliping thier children (at creche) seem to think it's not thier place to parent thier own children.

dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3698451/SARAH-VINE-s-wrong-strangers-telling-noisy-kids-Parents-barely-exercise-discipline-lives-let-children-s.html

does she do spankings?

SteM

Why doesn't the café owner tell the parents to tell their children to be quiet? Maybe she knows it'll cause problems. Unfortunately in this day and age it's not the done thing to reprimand other people's little darlings.

From the original FB post:

"We will give you five lenient minutes to ask the child to stop screaming and then we will ask the child ourselves."

For saying that, people are leaving negative reviews of the café which will harm her business.

What's the big deal? A lot of parents are happy to get some discreet back up when a situation gets out of control.

corner of hells

SteM wrote: »

Why doesn't the café owner tell the parents to tell their children to be quiet? Maybe she knows it'll cause problems. Unfortunately in this day and age it's not the done thing to reprimand other people's little darlings.

Can't do that , Boss, the could be gay Muslim traveller parents.Culture innit.

Smondie

andekwarhola wrote: »

Fairly ingenious method for indulging in S&M with random kids.

From the article:

The problem is that too many modern parents equate discipline with cruelty. They seem to think that giving a child clear boundaries is somehow mean.



Why should she talk to the parents first? She gives them 5 mins to sort it out. Unless the parents are blind and deaf, surely they can see for themselves what's going on. They just can't be bothered dealing with it.

SteM

Smondie wrote: »

...
Why should she talk to the parents first?...

Her idea of too much noise might not be the same as the parents. She runs what looks like an ice cream stall and probably has to deal with kids all day so her 'noise threshold' may be lower than parents. Not everything is so black-and-white.

I think it's fair to talk to the parents first, if the parents agree that their kids are too noisy then they should discipline their child. If the parents disagree then they're free to go somewhere else.

andekwarhola

Smondie wrote: »

From the article:

The problem is that too many modern parents equate discipline with cruelty. They seem to think that giving a child clear boundaries is somehow mean.



Why should she talk to the parents first? She gives them 5 mins to sort it out. Unless the parents are blind and deaf, surely they can see for themselves what's going on. They just can't be bothered dealing with it.

It was a joke.

andekwarhola

I wouldn't let my kids run around messing in a cafe but in the hypothetical situation that any kids were doing that with no parental supervision, I don't think it's unreasonable for the owner to ask them (or the parents) to stop it.

That said, the very nature of broadcasting that they're a super nanny badass out to right parental wrongs just make me think they're looking for publicity and affirmation from the kind of numpties that can't tolerate children even breathing in public spaces.

uck51js9zml2yt

Smondie wrote: »

From the article:

The problem is that too many modern parents equate discipline with cruelty. They seem to think that giving a child clear boundaries is somehow mean.



Why should she talk to the parents first? She gives them 5 mins to sort it out. Unless the parents are blind and deaf, surely they can see for themselves what's going on. They just can't be bothered dealing with it.

My kids have boundaries. They are 6 foot high with no way of escape.

She's bang on !

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

Yellow pack crisps

If they ain't listing to the parents then they ain't gonna listen to some bint with a spatula!

Smondie

Permabear wrote: »

This post had been deleted.

It is her business, her customers, her livelihood.

SEPT 23 1989

the Barman usually gives my kids more coke and crisps to quieten them down

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

She needs to appreciate that disciplining kids is the business of the parents, and her opinion on how other people should do things is only her opinion.

If I had a kid and someone else took it upon themselves to 'discipline' them, I'd be having words adult to adult.

She can talk to the parents all she likes but to echo a sentiment immortalized in song by Pink Floyd, she should leave them kids alone.

suicide_circus

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lkKwyjsJGxk

Smondie

Candie wrote: »

She needs to appreciate that disciplining kids is the business of the parents, and her opinion on how other people should do things is only her opinion.

If I had a kid and someone else took it upon themselves to 'discipline' them, I'd be having words adult to adult.

She can talk to the parents all she likes but to echo a sentiment immortalized in song by Pink Floyd, she should leave them kids alone.

She said a few parents have thrown tantrums. The children didn't lick it off the ground, as they say

Smondie

Smondie wrote: »

She said a few parents have thrown tantrums. The children didn't lick it off the ground, as they say

Then she can ask them all to leave and never come back.

What she hasn't any right to do is, as a complete stranger and grown adult, decide she knows how to discipline a strangers child and intervene.

suicide_circus

Candie wrote: »

Then she can ask them all to leave and never come back.

What she hasn't any right to do is, as a complete stranger and grown adult, decide she knows how to discipline a strangers child and intervene.

Agreed, she just needs to tell these anti social yummy mummies and their frightful spawn to gtfo

Smondie

Candie wrote: »

Then she can ask them all to leave and never come back.

What she hasn't any right to do is, as a complete stranger and grown adult, decide she knows how to discipline a strangers child and intervene.

Of course she has this "right'.

If parents can't be bothered why should everyone else put up with thier lack of interest in parenting thier child?

I can't stand these kid/parent hating threads. The last group of people AH finds it acceptable to be obnoxious about is kids and their parents.

Smondie

Smondie wrote: »

Of course she has this "right'.

If parents can't be bothered why should everyone else put up with thier lack of interest in parenting thier child?

Then ask them to leave and mind your own business. They're not her kids, disciplining them is not her business and it crosses a line. If she doesn't want them misbehaving in her cafe, she should tell them to go.

Ridiculous that everyone recognises that no one should put up with disruptive kids, but somehow thinks it's reasonable that a stranger intervenes and disciplines a strangers child.

Dolbert

Ugh these fcuking BREEDERS with their CROTCH SPAWN running around getting into my peripheral vision and ruining my latte I HATE THEM

Dolbert

Dolbert wrote: »

Ugh these fcuking BREEDERS with their CROTCH SPAWN running around getting into my peripheral vision and ruining my latte I HATE THEM

WHY must the world revolve around them?

WHY can't it revolve around ME??

Smondie

Candie wrote: »

Then ask them to leave and mind your own business. They're not her kids, disciplining them is not her business and it crosses a line. If she doesn't want them misbehaving in her cafe, she should tell them to go.

Ridiculous that everyone recognises that no one should put up with disruptive kids, but somehow thinks it's reasonable that a stranger intervenes and disciplines a strangers child.

they can leave if they want. She gives the parents time to react. If she has to react, it's lazyparenting

Smondie

Candie wrote: »

WHY must the world revolve around them?

WHY can't it revolve around ME??

Why can't it revolve about my unruly brats? They're entitled to cause havoc and disrupte everyone's lunch, except mine.

Olishi4

Smondie wrote: »

She said a few parents have thrown tantrums. The children didn't lick it off the ground, as they say

When I first met one of my neighbours, he was chatting to me and was giving out about other kids playing on the avenue. He said that one of them didn't have a coat. I remember thinking at the time that it was summer and the child in question is always out on his bike and he was probably just too warm.

Had he said it to someone else, they might not make those connections and easily assume that the mother lets the child out freezing but the reality is that the more I got to know that neighbour, it seems he just enjoys complaining about anyone and anything.

I don't think it's any ones job to disipline other people's children. They are there with their own parents. Most of the time they dont know the full story, know nothing about the child. In general though I don't really see kids misbehaving that much in restaurants or cafes as much as people seem to make out.

Sometimes kids do have tantrums. They are just learning. Everything is new to them. Sometimes if I a child is having a tantrum, they just need to have it and provoking or telling the child off in that moment might make the situation worse. How does she know that the parents aren't just waiting for a better time when the child is more calm to explain that they should not behave like that?

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

SteM

Permabear wrote: »

This post had been deleted.

Exactly. This is an ice-cream kiosk with a few chairs around it, a place that basically survives on parents paying through the nose for frozen sugar milk for their children.

Grayson

SteM wrote: »

Exactly. This is an ice-cream kiosk with a few chairs around it, a place that basically survives on parents paying through the nose for frozen sugar milk for their children.

In a small town all the parents will now have heard about the woman and will avoid her. She'll have very few parents visit her now.

Story Bud?

Grayson wrote: »

In a small town all the parents will now have heard about the woman and will avoid her. She'll have very few parents visit her now.

Or else she'll have lots of parents of nice well behaved children who are just thrilled to spend time with other like minded parents and kids.

Smondie

These parents let thier child pee on the floor and didn't bat an eye. I feel sorry for the children, it's not thier fault thier parents can't be bothered, pity there's not more people around like the cafe lady.

dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3699191/Outrage-parents-allow-child-toilet-Morning-floor.html#comments-3699191

Grayson

Story Bud? wrote: »

Or else she'll have lots of parents of nice well behaved children who are just thrilled to spend time with other like minded parents and kids.

Yeah, because parents love going somewhere that someone will tell them they're bad parents or will try to discipline their kids without their permission. So many parents love that.

Can you imagine any parent who'd be grateful if I walked up to their child in a supermarket or cafe and started disciplining them.

Winterlong

Grayson wrote: »

Yeah, because parents love going somewhere that someone will tell them they're bad parents or will try to discipline their kids without their permission. So many parents love that.

Can you imagine any parent who'd be grateful if I walked up to their child in a supermarket or cafe and started disciplining them.

The point is that if there is a place to go where there will be no little brats, and where well behaved kids are welcome, then some parents may see that as a plus. I would.

Smondie

Grayson wrote: »

Yeah, because parents love going somewhere that someone will tell them they're bad parents or will try to discipline their kids without their permission. So many parents love that.

Can you imagine any parent who'd be grateful if I walked up to their child in a supermarket or cafe and started disciplining them.

Who cares what the parents think? If they are that useless they sit there and ignore thier child disrupting everyone else, why should we be concerned about what they think?

Hologram

Children past toddler age should generally know about good and bad behaviour, but I would say there are more two/three-year-olds acting the demon in public due to no fault of the parent(s) (because that is unfortunately what a lot of two/three-year-olds do - they can be little ****ers but they don't know they're being little ****ers) than two/three-year-olds acting out in public due to their parent(s) not being bothered.

If there is a toddler having a screaming fit in public though and a strange adult comes over to discipline them, the toddler will likely lose their sh*t even more, so I don't know if it's the best idea - in relation to toddlers at least.

Also - and I know this is obviously rare - but some children with severe autism have screaming fits in public so if that were the case, a strange adult trying to discipline them could be quite serious in terms of how it would affect the child.

Safest bet in my opinion would be simply to ask the parent(s) to keep their child quiet (if it's clear that they can) or to leave.

Sand

Olishi4 wrote: »

Sometimes kids do have tantrums. They are just learning. Everything is new to them. Sometimes if I a child is having a tantrum, they just need to have it and provoking or telling the child off in that moment might make the situation worse. How does she know that the parents aren't just waiting for a better time when the child is more calm to explain that they should not behave like that?

Yeah, generations of parents going back to the stone age didn't know what they were doing by correcting their kids whilst they were screwing up. The latest fad of non-parenting, it will all work out in the end with no effort method is clearly the right way.

Your Face

Hang the lot of them.

Smondie

Sand wrote: »

Yeah, generations of parents going back to the stone age didn't know what they were doing by correcting their kids whilst they were screwing up. The latest fad of non-parenting, it will all work out in the end with no effort method is clearly the right way.

Most of the time it's the people at the creche parent them these days. Thier own parents just want all the happy, happy, fun time

keith16

Threads like this come up all the time and really highlight the attitude in Ireland that children should be seen and not heard. And preferably neither in public places.

All over the continent, kids are welcome in restaurants and cafés. Many have little play areas and will always give stuff to the kids to keep them entertained....colouring books, funny cutlery etc. All in all, it makes for a much more enjoyable environment for all.

I guess even the sight of children for people like the café owner mentioned here, have them thinking to themselves...."just wait until that little shit kicks off". Quite sad.

Olishi4

Sand wrote: »

Yeah, generations of parents going back to the stone age didn't know what they were doing by correcting their kids whilst they were screwing up. The latest fad of non-parenting, it will all work out in the end with no effort method is clearly the right way.

Smondie wrote: »

Most of the time it's the people at the creche parent them these days. Thier own parents just want all the happy, happy, fun time

Alright now Sand and Smondie, don't have a little tantrum about it.

I'll talk to you later, when you both calm down

CelticRambler

I had the surreal experience of watching a bunch of seven- or eight-year-olds giving a bunch of sixteen- and seventeen-year-olds a hard time over their "bad behaviour" during this last week. The youngsters were French (and one Franco-Hibernian :pac: ) ; the teens were English, and supposedly under my watchful eye. I took it off them for a moment to make sure they were given a good teasing by the French lads ... then went back to yelling at them myself.

Ironically, the one amongst them who had next-to-no parenting (at all) was one of the best behaved and most cooperative. Four of the six were lazy, messy feckers who did nothing without having orders barked at them and being threatened with starvation. It (only) took four days for them to fall in line, though ... and they all left yesterday asking if they could come back next year.

I have a couple of nephews like that too, and I do blame the parents ...

Smondie

So the floor peering family want people to give them 100,000 to fund thier bad parenting


dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3700841/Off-grid-mother-defends-one-year-old-daughter-WEEING-Morning-floor-parents-ask-strangers-100-000-fund-lifestyle.html

Dolbert

OP, are you the same rereg from the parenting forum who has a bee in his/her bonnet about creches, and childcare in general?