Unsolicited Advice

granty1987

Question for people here.

When, if ever do people (non PT at that gym) feel that you should give some unsolicited advice to a fellow gym goer?

I'm not keen on the brah guy walking around critiquing everyone, but what about when you notice someone repeatedly performing a lift / exercise with god awful technique that you know is going to end badly. Not necessarily like dropping-the-bar-on-their-head badly, but, more along the lines of youre-going-to-wreck-your-joints over time badly (eg a back squat with a badly rounded back and collapsed knees)

Or is it a better route to mention it to a PT there? Or just ignore the person, wish them the best and leave them at it.

I'm sure everyone here has seen loads of people with terrible form. Personally I appreciate some advice from someone as long as its the right advice. I dont give it but sometimes im pretty tempted

Alf Veedersane

Unless you're a trainer at the gym, the reception it will get is down to the person you give it to. They don't know how qualified or otherwise you are to give advice and so even if they listen and say 'Thanks' they might take zero of what you said on board.

MaxPower89

I've no qualifications so I wouldn't feel confident speaking out, even thought I've seen numerous people doing all sorts of crazy stuff. Looking back now myself - I was doing stuff ar$eways myself 6/7 years ago but if you stick with it you naturally learn and improve technique and form.

I think by and large the person receiving the advice would be thinking, 'thanks but I don't want to know'.

I do feel trainers in the gym should have a word if someone is doing something that will wreck them, but I don't see much of it in my gym.

Hanley

My rule is 'don't help anyone ever, unless they ask for it - then help with everything you've got'.

I've been burned numerous times offering help (...sometimes to people who have asked for it but didn't like the answer) so I don't bother anymore.

From a receiver perspective, they've no idea who you are, your motives or your ability so expect a frosty reception. You might get one or two warm responses, but most will be rough.

Kudos for caring tho

j.s. pill II

I'm generally very reluctant to dish out unsolicited advice. I've maybe done it twice in my life.

Once was yesterday when I saw a girl trying to do a Romanian deadlift with the worst possible form humanly imaginable. It was plain dangerous so I just politely asked if I could point out a few tips. She was quite grateful and said her friend had showed it to her one time and she though she was definitely doing it wrong alright.

This is a gym near my parent's house. It's run by the County Council and rarely any staff on the floor.

Anyway, no more advice from me till 2023.

Zillah

I've never done it, but I've been tempted a few times. I get especially annoyed when I see someone - their buddy, or sometimes even a trainer - giving horrible advice. I can't count the times I've seen a PT showing someone how to squat, and stand there nodding while the heels come up and the knees go in.

I really want to tell them that they should not be listening to/paying that person.

On the flipside I think I would get really annoyed if someone came over and started telling me what to do - but then again I do my research so I never manage to do anything particularly wrong.

caviardreams

This actually happened to me once and it irritated me a bit tbh. I was doing a metcon type work out of 20 air squats followed by 10 push-ups 10 rounds for time. Had just stopped for a short breather in between rounds when a PT came up to me and mansplained how to do a squat, that I should take a full 4 seconds on the way down and should not be doing that many at once or I would damage my knees.

I do tempo work a good bit and a lot of slow eccentric stuff, so I get his point but it wasn't really the aim of what I was doing on that occasion so it just annoyed me.

You never know what people's aims or motivations are. I often see people doing partial ROM stuff and it might well be for prehab, rehab, specific issues, or simply because they can't do a full ROM and are trying to work towards it with a progression e.g. push-ups, pull-ups etc. and may well be fully aware of what they are doing and know that it is not the full ROM.

COH

I pick one random person a day in the gym where I work out of and help them with something if it looks like they are struggling or are on the road to retardation.

Sometimes people appreciate it, sometimes people are rude/standoffish... other times they've said thanks and end up hiring me.

pinkypinky

I never offer but almost every time I'm in my gym, the rower is being murdered by someone. Of all cardio machines, it's the worst for poor form.

Hanley

COH wrote: »

other times they've said thanks and end up hiring me.

...and he's not even a PT!

JJayoo

Sometimes when I see a cocky sh1t in the gym doing something with shocking form it makes me happy Tehehehe

livedadream

i got friendly advice on my diet once.

almost punched the guy,

after a killer HIIT session with a guy whos a PT in another gym a douche bag comes over when im stretching and says

''you know theres no point killing yourself in the gym if your diets not on point', i could do you up a great food plan'

sorry why would you think my diets not 'on point' ???? because im not a size 10?

id lost 6 stone at this stage and cried...

but instead looked forward to the MASSIVE poster they were unveiling of me and my new healthy strong self (and the old not so healthy strong self) and just pointed to it the next time i saw him, and asked him if he needed help with his form i would be more than happy to help.

seriously if your not asked keep your mouth shut.

LuckyLloyd

Sometimes if I see someone doing something mid set that's dangerous (like on their toes squatting or letting their lower back round out during a deadlift) I'll shout a simple cue over. Might be "heels" or "chest up at the bottom" or something. But I'd look to see if a coach is watching them first.

If the recipient looks receptive after their set I might follow up.

But only on the really obvious things tbh with regard to bracing and basic form that I'm able to explain. Like I may notice technical things on lifts that might make the lifter more efficient or proficient but it's not my place to say.

Hanley

LuckyLloyd wrote: »

Sometimes if I see someone doing something mid set that's dangerous (like on their toes squatting or letting their lower back round out during a deadlift) I'll shout a simple cue over. Might be "heels" or "chest up at the bottom" or something. But I'd look to see if a coach is watching them first.

If the recipient looks receptive after their set I might follow up.

But only on the really obvious things tbh with regard to bracing and basic form that I'm able to explain. Like I may notice technical things on lifts that might make the lifter more efficient or proficient but it's not my place to say.

Settle down and keep your input to high fives and fist pumps

I love the way some of our guys will coach each other tbh. It's nice

JJayoo

LuckyLloyd wrote: »

Sometimes if I see someone doing something mid set that's dangerous (like on their toes squatting or letting their lower back round out during a deadlift) I'll shout a simple cue over. Might be "heels" or "chest up at the bottom" or something. But I'd look to see if a coach is watching them first.

A random person suddenly shouting at me mid set is upping my chances of getting injuried.

Dtp1979

JJayoo wrote: »

A random person suddenly shouting at me mid set is upping my chances of getting injuried.

Or their chances..

arybvtcw0eolkf

pinkypinky wrote: »

I never offer but almost every time I'm in my gym, the rower is being murdered by someone. Of all cardio machines, it's the worst for poor form.

Donkeys years ago I was on a Concept II rower and a defence forces rowing instructor corrected my form and stayed with me over a few days, now when I see someone on a rower I want to pass on the same knowledge ~ but tbh I don't.

I've never bothered correcting anyone's form, esp these days when its never been easier to access proper online tutorials for just about anything you want to do.

I'm rehab'ing a Grade III tear of my left pec (complete tear) and four months on I'm still struggling to do even the lightest isolation exercises on the muscle ~ I'm sure people are dying to roar at me to DB press more than 5kg ~ but I can't

LuckyLloyd

JJayoo wrote: »

A random person suddenly shouting at me mid set is upping my chances of getting injuried.

Dtp1979 wrote: »

Or their chances..

Not in an environment where people are used to receiving cues and corrections mid set imo. Private coached environments are probably very different to public gyms in respect of this question.

slicus ricus

The only time I have ever given unsolicited advice to someone is if I was working in with them on a piece of equipment and they were doing something horrifically dangerous looking. It has happened three times in recent memory, which is actually quite a lot considering I don't often ask to work in with people. My logic on this is that you have reason to be watching in that you're resting while they're lifting. Also they can see that you're doing it right when they're resting. From what I remember, in these instances it was well enough received as the lads weren't really aware they were doing it wrong or didn't have much critical awareness of what they were actually doing.

livedadream wrote: »

i got friendly advice on my diet once.

almost punched the guy,

after a killer HIIT session with a guy whos a PT in another gym a douche bag comes over when im stretching and says

''you know theres no point killing yourself in the gym if your diets not on point', i could do you up a great food plan'

sorry why would you think my diets not 'on point' ???? because im not a size 10?

id lost 6 stone at this stage and cried...

but instead looked forward to the MASSIVE poster they were unveiling of me and my new healthy strong self (and the old not so healthy strong self) and just pointed to it the next time i saw him, and asked him if he needed help with his form i would be more than happy to help.

seriously if your not asked keep your mouth shut.

That is absolutely shocking:eek:. What an idiot!! I wouldn't hold it against you if you had punched the guy in the face!

livedadream

slicus ricus wrote: »

The only time I have ever given unsolicited advice to someone is if I was working in with them on a piece of equipment and they were doing something horrifically dangerous looking. It has happened three times in recent memory, which is actually quite a lot considering I don't often ask to work in with people. My logic on this is that you have reason to be watching in that you're resting while they're lifting. Also they can see that you're doing it right when they're resting. From what I remember, in these instances it was well enough received as the lads weren't really aware they were doing it wrong or didn't have much critical awareness of what they were actually doing.



That is absolutely shocking:eek:. What an idiot!! I wouldn't hold it against you if you had punched the guy in the face!

yeah i think some people see a fat person and think jesus they mustnt have a clue what their doing, i should help, they dont stop to think they could be after losing a shed load of weight. i see him all the time in the gym now..

i just laugh now but it broke me that day.

MajorDon

livedadream wrote: »

''you know theres no point killing yourself in the gym if your diets not on point', i could do you up a great food plan'

That was his way of asking you out to dinner, I'd say.

Hazydays123

As a female i'd say my reaction would depend on how male and attractive you happen to be.

livedadream

MajorDon wrote: »

That was his way of asking you out to dinner, I'd say.

haaahahaha lolz jesus i dont think so, very smarmy.. very your fat so must need my help!

edit* as a caveat im not actually fat anymore but i was really really fat like 20 stone fat, i not a size 8 and never will be but i really dont think he was asking me out he was way to patronising for it to be that...

i did met my current boyfriend in the gym though...

he waited until we were in a night club before admiring my 'form' though :-)

DuffleBag

Personally, i'm in and out like a robbery. In, smash it, and leave. I'm not looking at anyone else (not including whatever decent bird is in there). I couldnt give a toss what form a person has in there as long as it's not affecting my workout. I would never try and critique someone. If you're not getting paid to do it, keep the mouth shut and worry about yourself.

I had a guy try and "motivate me" by shouting stuff he's no doubt heard on youtube during my reps. I couldnt hear him but could see his mouth moving. I had to take my headphones out and ask him to politely go away. Everyone motivates themselves differently.

NiallBoo

Ah bless, people want to help people learn...but all they'll teach them is to stay at home because their gym is full of wànkers.

JesusRef

Once ever I approached a young lad in the gym who was going to hurt himself deadlifting - I argued with myself for 10 minutes about whether to do it or not - but eventually I just said f*ck it he is going to hurt himself.

So I just asked him if he had ever deadlifted before or been shown to deadlift. The answer was no.. I just went through why lifting and starting at his age was the best decision of his life but to get a coach to show him first...
Did some deadlifts with him... told him to keep lifting...

Felt like a d!ck but I honestly couldn't watch him any longer

HamsterFace

maybe it depends on the person, but I'd be grateful to get some good friendly advice from someone who obviously knows more than me

NiallBoo

JesusRef wrote: »

Once ever I approached a young lad in the gym who was going to hurt himself deadlifting - I argued with myself for 10 minutes about whether to do it or not - but eventually I just said f*ck it he is going to hurt himself.

So I just asked him if he had ever deadlifted before or been shown to deadlift. The answer was no.. I just went through why lifting and starting at his age was the best decision of his life but to get a coach to show him first...
Did some deadlifts with him... told him to keep lifting...

Felt like a d!ck but I honestly couldn't watch him any longer

Glad it worked out, but given how often this annoys people, it's risky.

If you're genuinely worried about someone causing immediate injury, you'd be much better telling someone who works in the gym.

slicus ricus

NiallBoo wrote: »

Glad it worked out, but given how often this annoys people, it's risky.

If you're genuinely worried about someone causing immediate injury, you'd be much better telling someone who works in the gym.

I think it's way worse to go to someone who works in the gym to report that a fellow gym member is likely to hurt themselves with their technique than just having a quiet word and offering advice.

There's a big difference between advising someone who is doing something dangerous and clearly hasn't got a clue what they're doing than advising someone whose form is ok (i.e. safe) but could be a little bit better. Generally the person who doesn't know what they're doing won't get annoyed by advice - most would probably look up to experienced lifters who are in better shape than them. If they do get annoyed, so what - it's their loss for not taking advice and there's nothing more you can do to prevent them from potentially hurting themselves.

Alf Veedersane

slicus ricus wrote: »

Generally the person who doesn't know what they're doing won't get annoyed by advice - most would probably look up to experienced lifters who are in better shape than them.

That's if they know the person offering the advice is an experienced lifter and likely to be using decent form themselves.

Plenty of big guys in good shape in gyms using terrible form thinking it's good form.

whippet

when I started out lifting I was only delighted to get friendly advise from the experienced heads in the gym. It moved from just getting a few pointers to actually training with them.

Its all horses for courses .. but I was so raw to lifting it was obvious so the more experienced lad would let me know what I was doing wrong / dangerous. As I was receptive to it .. the advice turned from how not to kill myself or others to how to shift more weight etc.

Everyone is different and everyone will react differently

slicus ricus

Alf Veedersane wrote: »

That's if they know the person offering the advice is an experienced lifter and likely to be using decent form themselves.

Plenty of big guys in good shape in gyms using terrible form thinking it's good form.

That is a true and valid point.

I was looking at this from the standpoint that the person offering the advice is an experienced lifter who has decent form. As in, if you can spot lifting technique that's dangerous, odds are you know what you're doing and most likely lift with good form.

rondog

Had an incidence of this last thursday in the gym.2 lads about 19/20 in the gym.Must have done 6 mins on the treadmill.Walked around and picked up some weights-no sets, just picking them up and doing 2 reps in a machine just to test it.They flexed a bit in the mirrors,fixed their hair and said 'will we hit the jacuzzi'.
Off they went.I saw them again in the changing room and one of the lads pulled out his tub of protein and put 2 scoops in a mixer with water and guzzled it back like he earned it.
Im not an expert but I know a fair bit so I asked him why he was taking 2 scoops of whey and was he doing any other work out.He explained that what he did was his workout and he did it twice a week.I explained about the excess calories and that he had no need to take 2 scoops if that was his workout and he was eating 4 other meals a day.This lad was fat(not to mingle my words) ,had the fat rosy red cheeks and man boobs,the works.Anyway,after I took some time and went thru everything with him,i saw him look at his mate and roll his eyes.As they left I could hear them giggle and slag what i had said.
Not that I gave a toss but it seems some people will take what they think they know and disregard anything they 'think' is BS.
Couldn't help thinking about the poor fat sod and how he is on the road to mornid obesity and hoped that he would learn his mistakes before there is too much damage done.
Just saw same lad in the gym yesterday,pushed a prowler about 20 metres with no weight on it.Did 3 reps with a barbell then went for a sauna.Treated himself after his intense workout with a 2 scoop shake ,showered,did his hair and off he went.

livedadream

rondog wrote: »

Im not an expert but I know a fair bit so I asked him why he was taking 2 scoops of whey and was he doing any other work out...This lad was fat(not to mingle my words) ,had the fat rosy red cheeks and man boobs,the works.Anyway,after I took some time and went thru everything with him,i saw him look at his mate and roll his eyes.As they left I could hear them giggle and slag what i had said...
t the poor fat sod and how he is on the road to morbid obesity a.

helpful tip, if you approach someone asking why their taking 2 scoops straight off it might not be met with the best reaction.

maybe approaching differently might help?

maybe the 'poor fat sod' as you so eloquently called him is too embarrassed to hit the gym because the adonis's like yourself are always offering 'helpful' information...

i accept you were just trying to help him but your approach of ''why are you taking 2 scoops'' as opposed a softly softly wins the monkey might have been the off putter.

for alot of us fat sods getting to the gym alone is tough enough. try approaching him with respect next time. maybe he could read the contempt you appear to have for him on your face when you were being so 'helpful'

rondog

livedadream wrote: »

rondog wrote: »

Im not an expert but I know a fair bit so I asked him why he was taking 2 scoops of whey and was he doing any other work out...This lad was fat(not to mingle my words) ,had the fat rosy red cheeks and man boobs,the works.Anyway,after I took some time and went thru everything with him,i saw him look at his mate and roll his eyes.As they left I could hear them giggle and slag what i had said...
t the poor fat sod and how he is on the road to morbid obesity a.

helpful tip, if you approach someone asking why their taking 2 scoops straight off it might not be met with the best reaction.

maybe approaching differently might help?

maybe the 'poor fat sod' as you so eloquently called him is too embarrassed to hit the gym because the adonis's like yourself are always offering 'helpful' information...

i accept you were just trying to help him but your approach of ''why are you taking 2 scoops'' as opposed a softly softly wins the monkey might have been the off putter.

for alot of us fat sods getting to the gym alone is tough enough. try approaching him with respect next time. maybe he could read the contempt you appear to have for him on your face when you were being so 'helpful'

I was summing up the conversation.I didn't actually come straight out with 'WHY ARE YOU TAKING 2 SCOOPS'?.They actually started the chat with a question to me about my runners.After a bit I asked how they were getting on and were they trying to bulk up which led to the question about about the 2 scoops.I was very friendly for you information and took time to explain the basics of nutrition.All while he seemed interested than scoffed at the whole thing.

Im certainly not an Adonis but thanks for the compliment but after having taken time to go thru all of this and it was met which such disregard I cant say I have any sympathy.

livedadream

rondog wrote: »

I was summing up the conversation.I didn't actually come straight out with 'WHY ARE YOU TAKING 2 SCOOPS'?.

you didnt actually say that though, im not psychic mate, i can only go on what you tell me...

but considering the name of the thread is ''unsolicited advice'' then maybe while you were offering yours he realised he didnt ask for nor want it... and didnt want to be rude.

rondog

livedadream wrote: »

you didnt actually say that though, im not psychic mate, i can only go on what you tell me...

but considering the name of the thread is ''unsolicited advice'' then maybe while you were offering yours he realised he didnt ask for nor want it... and didnt want to be rude.

It wasn't solicited but offered from my own free will with good intentions and I would have had no problem if he stopped me halfway through and said thanks but hes doing it his own way.But to allow me to ramble on for about 8 minutes then roll his eyes didn't sit well with me.And ,to just write it off as BS is his own loss.

Mellor

livedadream wrote: »

you didnt actually say that though, im not psychic mate, i can only go on what you tell me...

but considering the name of the thread is ''unsolicited advice'' then maybe while you were offering yours he realised he didnt ask for nor want it... and didnt want to be rude.

I think you are letting your own experience colour your reading of the situation above.
It sounds like that's just the way their conversation went, and it didn;t just bombard the overweight guy drinking a shake. Training and nutrition is not an uncommon conversation piece at the gym.

Or maybe he was out of line, who knows.

livedadream

Mellor wrote: »

I think you are letting your own experience colour your reading of the situation above.
It sounds like that's just the way their conversation went, and it didn;t just bombard the overweight guy drinking a shake. Training and nutrition is not an uncommon conversation piece at the gym.

Or maybe he was out of line, who knows.

it has, because ive been that ''fat sod'' in the gym. and ive been on the recieving end of i can fit your diet (the implied your a chubbster so must need my help)

but im now also the person that other (women in general to be fair) in my gym seek out to ask for help. and while im happy to offer my own experience not everyone reacts the same way to diet and exercise and lifestyle change.

i read his post the way it was written, if he had said, we were chatting in the changing room and they asked me about my trainers and we were having a conversation opposed to '' i asked him why he was having 2 scoops'' it would have read very differently.

he also mentioned the kid is 19/20.. i dont know many 19/20 year olds now a days that will listen attentively while someone is telling them what to do or what not to do if they dont want to listen.

Zillah

livedadream wrote: »

it has, because ive been that ''fat sod'' in the gym. and ive been on the recieving end of i can fit your diet (the implied your a chubbster so must need my help)

but im now also the person that other (women in general to be fair) in my gym seek out to ask for help. and while im happy to offer my own experience not everyone reacts the same way to diet and exercise and lifestyle change.

i read his post the way it was written, if he had said, we were chatting in the changing room and they asked me about my trainers and we were having a conversation opposed to '' i asked him why he was having 2 scoops'' it would have read very differently.

he also mentioned the kid is 19/20.. i dont know many 19/20 year olds now a days that will listen attentively while someone is telling them what to do or what not to do if they dont want to listen.

I think you might be a little overly defensive because of your own experiences. He gave us the glib version initially, but has corrected himself since - he didn't just pounce on him out of the blue.

The lad in question didn't need advice because he was fat, he needed advice because he was doing very little work and then downing a double-shake, which would suggest he has a few misconceptions about health and fitness.

livedadream

Zillah wrote: »

I think you might be a little overly defensive because of your own experiences. He gave us the glib version initially, but has corrected himself since - he didn't just pounce on him out of the blue.

The lad in question didn't need advice because he was fat,

if this is true then the poster wouldnt have needed to describe the kid in detail,

man boobs, rosy cheeks the works

this had already been addressed so apart from assuming you cant read or just cant be bothered i will reiterate:

read my post the first line of it is agreeing with mellor...

I think you are letting your own experience colour your reading of the situation above.

again i reacted to the posters first post. yes i am defensive.

of course my personal experience colours my reading of it, but again, if he had elaborated my reaction would be been different. that just plain common sense. i can only react to whats written i cant guess he had a longer chat with him than he said in the op.

at the end of the day no one knows what anyone else is going though in their life, im not saying we have to pussy foot around the place but a bit of common courtesy could hold.

dont assume all fat people are lazy and dont know what their doing.

like ive said before, the kid (he was a child remember) was in the gym, yeah maybe he didnt know what the fcuk he was doing but you have to start somewhere, maybe it had taken all his confidence to get to the gym that day... for fear of being called a ''fat sod'' by close minded as$holes.

he never asked the guy for his opinion or to

took some time and went thru everything with him,i saw him look at his mate and roll his eyes.As they left I could hear them giggle and slag what i had said

and maybe him laughing it off was him trying to save face in front of his friend.

again he didnt ask and most people wouldnt spout diet and nutrition facts and tips to a stranger in a changing room. as we can clearly see from this thread.

again its called unsolicited advice, maybe take heed of the title.

slicus ricus

Zillah wrote: »

The lad in question didn't need advice because he was fat, he needed advice because he was doing very little work and then downing a double-shake, which would suggest he has a few misconceptions about health and fitness.

livedadream wrote:

if this is true then the poster wouldnt have needed to describe the kid in detail,
Quote: "man boobs, rosy cheeks the works"

Think the key point here is that downing a double-shake having burned off very little calories in his work out is not going to help the guy (a 19-20 year old adult) get into better shape, if anything it is likely to be counter productive to that goal. I'm assuming here that one of his motivations in going to the gym and investing in supplements is to get into better shape, among other things (improved strength, fitness gains, etc). The poster giving the advice was good enough to bother to explain this to him when he was under no obligation to do so - I don't see what the problem is.

NiallBoo

slicus ricus wrote: »

Think the key point here is that downing a double-shake having burned off very little calories in his work out is not going to help the guy (a 19-20 year old adult) get into better shape, if anything it is likely to be counter productive to that goal. I'm assuming here that one of his motivations in going to the gym and investing in supplements is to get into better shape, among other things (improved strength, fitness gains, etc).

The double-scoop thing is still a red-herring. We don't know what his overall diet is like and it could have been part of sensible diet. 2 scoops is what, 200-400 calories? Hardly crazy - it could just be a convenient snack for someone on the go.

slicus ricus wrote: »

The poster giving the advice was good enough to bother to explain this to him when he was under no obligation to do so - I don't see what the problem is.

The problem is that whatever your intentions, you never know how it's going to be received and you could easily do more harm than good. It's not fair to put others in that position.

Alf Veedersane

Whatever about unsolicited lifting advice, I really don't think people would take too kindly too unsolicited nutrition advice.

slicus ricus

NiallBoo wrote:

The double-scoop thing is still a red-herring. We don't know what his overall diet is like and it could have been part of sensible diet. 2 scoops is what, 200-400 calories? Hardly crazy - it could just be a convenient snack for someone on the go.

True, I have no idea to be honest. Just going on what rondog said in his post.

NiallBoo wrote:

The problem is that whatever your intentions, you never know how it's going to be received and you could easily do more harm than good. It's not fair to put others in that position.

I'm a firm believer in being straight with people when they ask for advice. I know in this instance, he wasn't asked for advice as such and it just came up in conversation. If I asked, I would definitely appreciate a straight answer, even if it wasn't the one I wanted to hear - at least then, I can consider it and maybe make a change for the better. None of us are perfect and above advice on how to do things better, I try not to take it personally anyway.

Alf Veedersane wrote: »

Whatever about unsolicited lifting advice, I really don't think people would take too kindly too unsolicited nutrition advice.

Generally not and in all honesty I would never personally offer unsolicited nutrition advice to anyone. I think the scenario here was a bit different in that it came up in conversation and the poster genuinely tried to help.

Alf Veedersane

slicus ricus wrote: »

I think the scenario here was a bit different in that it came up in conversation and the poster genuinely tried to help.

Maybe so but still...

But to allow me to ramble on for about 8 minutes then roll his eyes didn't sit well with me

There's imparting a bit of advice and then there's rambling on for 8 minutes.

8 (EIGHT) minutes.

rondog

Just to add to it as a previous poster said 'he was only a kid',i think this is BS.Hes a 19/20 year old adult and if along the way someone had stopped to explain to him the very basics of nutrition then he wouldn't be in that shape.
Maybe if someone had sat him down and said 'listen mate,take it or leave it but you are very overweight and are not going the right way about losing weight' then maybe he would be much more healthy.Im not a believer in being PC.I was a fat kid and was left to my own devices.It wasn't until my cousin sat me down and explained what I was doing wrong and how to fix it.He told me the truth ie I was fat and getting fatter and would be very unhappy.I took this on the chin and am now very fit and in shape.
I tried to pass on this advice to the lad so he doesn't waste many more years downing 2 scoops of whey while doing 5 mins on the treadmill and wondering why he doesn't look like his mate squireller who plays football,GAA and hurling.
Im not qualified in psychology so didn't have time to assess the situation on how best to approach the situation for optimal response.
The guy CLEARLY needed to be told(and in a very friendly and helpful tone) what was wrong.
As I mentioned,he told me he was eating 5 times a day,a proper dinner ,breakfast etc and had absolutely no business taking 2 scoops of protein.
Maybe when he hits 30 and is sitting home alone severly overweight with type 2 diabetes, and wondering why he has no girlfriend,will he regret not taking that unsolicited advice!!
Im happy that at least I tried,solicited or unsolicited.

Hanley

rondog wrote: »

Just to add to it as a previous poster said 'he was only a kid',i think this is BS.Hes a 19/20 year old adult and if along the way someone had stopped to explain to him the very basics of nutrition then he wouldn't be in that shape.
Maybe if someone had sat him down and said 'listen mate,take it or leave it but you are very overweight and are not going the right way about losing weight' then maybe he would be much more healthy.Im not a believer in being PC.I was a fat kid and was left to my own devices.It wasn't until my cousin sat me down and explained what I was doing wrong and how to fix it.He told me the truth ie I was fat and getting fatter and would be very unhappy.I took this on the chin and am now very fit and in shape.
I tried to pass on this advice to the lad so he doesn't waste many more years downing 2 scoops of whey while doing 5 mins on the treadmill and wondering why he doesn't look like his mate squireller who plays football,GAA and hurling.
Im not qualified in psychology so didn't have time to assess the situation on how best to approach the situation for optimal response.
The guy CLEARLY needed to be told(and in a very friendly and helpful tone) what was wrong.
As I mentioned,he told me he was eating 5 times a day,a proper dinner ,breakfast etc and had absolutely no business taking 2 scoops of protein.
Maybe when he hits 30 and is sitting home alone severly overweight with type 2 diabetes, and wondering why he has no girlfriend,will he regret not taking that unsolicited advice!!
Im happy that at least I tried,solicited or unsolicited.

Your cousin. A family member. Who you presumably had a close relationship with.

Telling someone you don't know what they have and do not have business doing is like me lobbing the gob on random strangers and justifying it by saying "but my girlfriend likes it".

Alf Veedersane

rondog wrote: »

Just to add to it as a previous poster said 'he was only a kid',i think this is BS.Hes a 19/20 year old adult and if along the way someone had stopped to explain to him the very basics of nutrition then he wouldn't be in that shape.
Maybe if someone had sat him down and said 'listen mate,take it or leave it but you are very overweight and are not going the right way about losing weight' then maybe he would be much more healthy.Im not a believer in being PC.I was a fat kid and was left to my own devices.It wasn't until my cousin sat me down and explained what I was doing wrong and how to fix it.He told me the truth ie I was fat and getting fatter and would be very unhappy.I took this on the chin and am now very fit and in shape.
I tried to pass on this advice to the lad so he doesn't waste many more years downing 2 scoops of whey while doing 5 mins on the treadmill and wondering why he doesn't look like his mate squireller who plays football,GAA and hurling.
Im not qualified in psychology so didn't have time to assess the situation on how best to approach the situation for optimal response.
The guy CLEARLY needed to be told(and in a very friendly and helpful tone) what was wrong.
As I mentioned,he told me he was eating 5 times a day,a proper dinner ,breakfast etc and had absolutely no business taking 2 scoops of protein.
Maybe when he hits 30 and is sitting home alone severly overweight with type 2 diabetes, and wondering why he has no girlfriend,will he regret not taking that unsolicited advice!!
Im happy that at least I tried,solicited or unsolicited.

You getting advice from your cousin and a young lad in the gym getting advice from a stranger in the gym are completely different.

If you're trying to help a stranger then you have to appreciate that delivery makes a massive difference and you don't need a degree in psychology for that.

livedadream

im sticking with Alf post on this:

There's imparting a bit of advice and then there's rambling on for 8 minutes.

8 (EIGHT) minutes.

rondog

The guy CLEARLY needed to be told(and in a very friendly and helpful tone) what was wrong.

A very friendly and helpful tone type of delivery good enough for you or would you like to know how my body language was so you can further critique that too?