Suppose it's all true

Kermit.de.frog

...Suppose it's all true and you arrive at the Pearly Gates and are greeted by GOD, what will you say to HIM, HER or IT?

failinis

Why are you so cruel.

Lady is a tramp

Feck.

Agent Smith

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

...Suppose it's all true and you arrive at the Pearly Gates and are greeted by GOD, what will you say to HIM, HER or IT?

Does jet fuel actually melt steel beams?

SEPT 23 1989

Can I come in?

RayM

"Jaysus"

And then Christ will stick his head around the door... "You called..?"

Layinghen

Don't worry it's not.........

RobbingBandit

Where's Saint Peter or even the truck stop instead of Saint Peter. That's what I'd ask.

SEPT 23 1989

Layinghen wrote: »

Don't worry it's not.........

You won't get in with that attitude

Annasopra

Can I see My Mum and Grandparents now?

AndyBoBandy

Thank füčk you forgive all.

Why are you such a cüñt?

Severard

If you send me back to earth & I become a suicide bomber, will I get those 72 virgins that's all the craze at the moment?

The_Valeyard

"what's your view on which bathrooms people should use"

hairyslug

Why could I never grow as awesome a beard as him?

AndyBoBandy

What would have happened in 2002 if Keane had remained and played with the Irish team at the World Cup?

xabi

Is that you Gay?

KERSPLAT!

Well, how's she cuttin'

Rachiee

Is it any good in there?... It sounds kinda boring? I do I have to go in or can I go back?

stuar

Thank you Lord for all you have given me, thank you for all that your doing now. I'm sorry that when given free will I didn't use it as good as I should have. Selah

sjb25

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

...Suppose it's all true and you arrive at the Pearly Gates and are greeted by GOD, what will you say to HIM, HER or IT?

Hmmmmm You no the way you are all forgiving well ............... If that fails at least il be warm for eternity

Kermit.de.frog

xabi wrote: »

Is that you Gay?

1.50

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XXzl9hKbQkU

Archeron

If God personally answers the front door to all 150 thousand or so people who die every day, it's no wonder he hasn't got time to answer anybodies prayers.

frag420

Are you aware you may be paying too much for your electricity...

Renegade Mechanic

failinis wrote: »

Why are you so cruel.

Problem is, he's not. I recall being told we were given free will. Making us responsible, not him.
Had to chuckle when I realised that. Reckon if he is indeed there, then the bugger is a Lawyer...

The_Valeyard

Do you know what a tracker mortgage is?

wolfeye

It's not my time...

Fleawuss

OP sounds like Gay Byrne in his declining years, grasping at straws.

Capt'n Midnight

It's true.

All Theories Proven With One Graph

BBDBB

Why are you such a snowflake

Sweetemotion

Woohoo. Where are my 72 virgins?

Beautiful Slut

Renegade Mechanic wrote: »

Problem is, he's not. I recall being told we were given free will. Making us responsible, not him.
Had to chuckle when I realised that. Reckon if he is indeed there, then the bugger is a Lawyer...

In reality free will is an illusion. Atoms of your brain can only behave in one particular way that they do. Essentially your brain is an extremely complicated set of dominos.

Sweetemotion

Beautiful Slut wrote: »

In reality free will is an illusion. Atoms of your brain can only behave in one particular way that they do. Essentially your brain is an extremely complicated set of dominos.

Where did you come from? You aint a virgin, you are beautiful though.

maudgonner

When you're moderating Boards, why do you adopt all these fake personas?

If you're going to persist with the charade, you at least need to do it a bit better. Because there's loads of wise folks who see through your act - they give out all the time about mods 'who act like they're God'.

Renegade Mechanic

Beautiful Slut wrote: »

In reality free will is an illusion. Atoms of your brain can only behave in one particular way that they do. Essentially your brain is an extremely complicated set of dominos.

And the clicking stopped in mine some time ago

faceman

Did I leave the immersion on?

GreatDefector

That money was just resting in my account

boobar

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

...Suppose it's all true and you arrive at the Pearly Gates and are greeted by GOD, what will you say to HIM, HER or IT?

Howya Bono

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

Hello again.

How have things been since we spoke this morning?

Great to finally meet you.



Edit: Oh and could you see your way to sending a bit of sense to Kermit?

Adyx

Renegade Mechanic wrote:

Problem is, he's not. I recall being told we were given free will. Making us responsible, not him. Had to chuckle when I realised that. Reckon if he is indeed there, then the bugger is a Lawyer...

If we were given free will by a god, why do religions insist we will be punished by that god for exercising that free will?

Arghus

Can we get up to all sorts in here?

DEFTLEFTHAND

If it's all true as you say a non believer won't be anywhere near the pearly gates. The conversation will be with Lucifer, not St Peter. You must repent your sins and accept the Lord while you're still alive.

BBDBB

I just knew there'd be a catch

Roger_007

Do you have Sky Sports?

suicide_circus

Sweetemotion wrote: »

Woohoo. Where are my 72 virgins?

That'll be the next boards beers mate

buried

What time do ye stop serving breakfast?

quickbeam

Renegade Mechanic wrote: »

Problem is, he's not. I recall being told we were given free will. Making us responsible, not him.
Had to chuckle when I realised that. Reckon if he is indeed there, then the bugger is a Lawyer...

Suicide bombers, rapists, etc, of course are acting of their own free will, and if there is a god* then he can't be responsible for them freely chosing evil.

But he is cruel if he inflicts things like cancer, zika, cerebal palsey, earthquakes, floods, droughts, etc on us. If he's a good and benevelent god, and all powerful, then there's no reason for him not to prevent these things, for his creations that he supposedly loves.

* for the record, there isn't.

Speedwell

Where were you when I needed you? Why didn't you talk to me? What the **** do you want with me now?

dr.fuzzenstein

Adyx wrote: »

If we were given free will by a god, why do religions insist we will be punished by that god for exercising that free will?

You're confusing god and religion. One is a metaphysical construct, or magic man in the clouds as I like to call it and the other is a man-made scam to surpress people and exploit them.
The first would be a harmless enough concept, but then we decided to start killing people because my sky fairy is better than your sky fairy and the second is simply the exploitation of that mass insanity to steer people and take their money.

On that side note:
Suppose there is a god, "he" just set the wheels of the universe in motion. But it's just so handy to blame our own crappiness on a made up concept. And stop with the disease blaming, blaming a non existent entity for not reaching down from the sky and curing us of everything including the sniffles is simply idiotic.
Shocking how most people's spirituality hasn't progressed from 10 years old and Sunday school. But stifling spirituality is another function of the church.

suicide_circus

dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »

You're confusing god and religion. One is a metaphysical construct, or magic man in the clouds as I like to call it and the other is a man-made scam to surpress people and exploit them.
The first would be a harmless enough concept, but then we decided to start killing people because my sky fairy is better than your sky fairy and the second is simply the exploitation of that mass insanity to steer people and take their money.

On that side note:
Suppose there is a god, "he" just set the wheels of the universe in motion. But it's just so handy to blame our own crappiness on a made up concept. And stop with the disease blaming, blaming a non existent entity for not reaching down from the sky and curing us of everything including the sniffles is simply idiotic.
Shocking how most people's spirituality hasn't progressed from 10 years old and Sunday school. But stifling spirituality is another function of the church.

While I agree with your sentiments on organised religion, it apparently still gives comfort and solace to billions of people. Same way those teleshopping channels are a pure moneymaking enterprise but some people put them on as it helps them drift off to sleep.

Colser

What's the Wi-Fi code here?

timthumbni

For some reason my post on this earlier has disappeared.

Considering Ireland (as in the island) has a history of kiddie fiddling priests from the catholic side who vast numbers still follow their teachings and fundamental Orangemen from the Protestant side I would seriously Question gods motives unless it was a piss take.

Don't worry though as its all bull****. Let's be honest here.