Fear of Abandonment

Makapakka

i thought I'd post this here as it's more parenting related.. I live with my mum and my daughter who is 2.5. This morning she didn't want to say goodbye to my mum and had a meltdown when my mum left for work. Her words still hurt my heart as she was just saying "talk to me nana talk to me" because she thought my mum wasn't answering her (as she had left the house). I am welling up thinking about it.. It brought back memories of my childhood calling for my mam and crying my eyes out when being left with y aunt while she went off to work.. My mam is loving and gave my daughter lots of hugs and kisses this morning before she left but this post is basically about how to make my daughter feel secure.. My ultimate fear is not being a good enough mother and making her feel abandoned.. As I have grown up feeling lonely and unloved .. What can I do to make sure she knows she is loved?

Judge Trudy

I know you are a great mother and I know your daughter feels loved. Just make sure you do lots of things together and have lots of bonding time. I had an amazingly deep bond with my mother because she was always there for me. She didn't spoil me in a material way, just gave me her time and energy. Your daughter will always remember that.

celligraphy

Do you give your daughter hugs and kisses ? I'm not much of an affectionate person , really I hate or her people touching or hugging me , but I love hugging and kissing my daughter so much it want always like that when she was born I didn't really know what to do but I forced myself to snuggle her until it felt normal now I wake up in the middle of the night to run to her bed and Kiss her .

I know how you feel ok just started work and I feel like I 've abandoned her in creche hope your ok op and remember you are doing the best you can

Dravokivich

I think she just doesn't understand what is happening. My son does this sometimes with me too. He's around the same age as your daughter. I just get on with it. He'll see me again later and he'll forget what had happened this morning.

IvyTheTerrible

Do you or your mum explain to her that your mum is going to work but she'll be back at dinner time (or whenever)?
I know my son used to get upset more if we hadn't explained where one of us was going or when we were coming back, than if we had explained what was happening.

Roselm

I'd have a look for a little story book that explains where grownups go during the day