Weekends being single (30's). What do you do?

LegacyUser

I'm 36, single, very small family (parents deceased), friends are settled with young kids.....I'm starting to dread weekends! I don't have a big circle but I really have nobody for company at the weekends and I'm starting to get sad about it.

I'm relatively shy so going to cafes etc. on my own seeing people with their families / kids makes me feel more alone. Only so many coffees one can have in a weekend!

I walk/swim but don't get chatting to others that way. I work 50 hour weeks so I do like some "me" time and don't want to volunteer to do much as I am drained from work at the end of the week so don't want to commit to something that I stop if I'm too tired.

As my friends have young children, they don't have the energy or interest in going out these days - I have noticed I distance myself a bit because of that. I don't push myself on people.

So any single girls/guys in the same position out there....what do you do to fill your weekends??

Meetup.com might be a good start, depending on where you're living. There's some prominent and numerous groups in Dublin, not so much elsewhere in the country, sadly.

Check out the various subforums around the place - After Hours, Gentleman's Club, Ladies Lounge, the Regional Forums. All of these are known to have beers.

Not entirely what you're asking about, but they would be great platforms to grow your own personal circle of friends.

IvoryTower

You could join a running club, a good way to meet people

Ursus Horribilis

A hillwalking club? There's one where I live and they go off to different places every Sunday. There's also a cycling club that caters for people who want to go out for a spin rather than racing.

magicmushroom

Odus fell down wrote: »

A hillwalking club? There's one where I live and they go off to different places every Sunday. There's also a cycling club that caters for people who want to go out for a spin rather than racing.

+1 on this, not sure where you're based but there are 2 good ones in the Meath area, Navan Trekkers and Tredagh trekkers. They go out on alternate Sundays.

I used to think of hillwalking as an 'old peoples' thing but then I tried it and I love it - made a good friend through it recently - I'm 29 by the way

I'm also single and live alone, friends have kids etc - same situation as you.

I just try out different things; yoga, meditation, meet ups etc - meetup.com is good as already mentioned.
There's also a FB page called GirlCrew and they have different groups for each county - all regularly meet up for coffee, cinema, nights out etc. (That's assuming that you're female!)

zoobizoo

Find a club of something you really love doing and you'll find that not everyone in their spends the weekends looking after kids/in IKEA/hungover/watching tv.....

Active clubs are great as they often travel at weekends, sharing houses etc and people who are in to one activity are usually into more (surfing/kayaking/mountain biking etc)

I joined a club in my 30s (having never been a member of one before) and it opened up my eyes to all of the above - it really opened my eyes as my friends were all having kids or just not into activities.

Plus, you get to meet lots of other single people

LegacyUser

Thanks for all the tips - much appreciated.

I looked at meet up but nothing in my county.

I looked at the hillwalking group on fb & it was last used 2 years ago and pictures were of people 60+ but I will keep looking.

I know I have to force myself to join something - when I have joined classes before, there always seem to be a duo together & conversation is kept among themselves - I'm just not able to go and talk in those circumstances as I feel I'm imposing.

I will look up more at the weekend and hopefully find something.

magicmushroom

single and bored wrote: »

Thanks for all the tips - much appreciated.

I looked at meet up but nothing in my county.

I looked at the hillwalking group on fb & it was last used 2 years ago and pictures were of people 60+ but I will keep looking.

I know I have to force myself to join something - when I have joined classes before, there always seem to be a duo together & conversation is kept among themselves - I'm just not able to go and talk in those circumstances as I feel I'm imposing.

I will look up more at the weekend and hopefully find something.

Which county are you in OP? Some people on here might be able to point you in the right direction of interesting clubs then

LegacyUser

I'm in Waterford - the area is quite rural. Originally from Tipperary but parents home was sold so I don't go back much.

I house share with 2 guys but 1 stays in his room a lot & the other works really long hours and stays a lot at his girlfriend's house. House is nice so would be hard to move out.

I have looked into things in the city but lots is aimed at families - I know it probably sounds mad but I'm just very uncomfortable going to cinema/cafes etc etc on my own. It does upset me more as u feel more alone. Sorry to be moaning - I know I'm healthy, have a job etc etc but I'm already dreading 5pm as it's facing 3 nights and 2 days alone. ..again!! At least it's raining - it's easier to stay indoors!

magicmushroom

No need to be sorry, you're hardly moaning - loneliness is horrible and a lot of people don't realise how soul destroying it can be.

I wouldn't want to go to the cinema by myself either - I go to a local café sometimes, but only if I'm up early and I will find a corner where I can sit with a book. I wouldn't want to be there when it's very busy.

http://www.comeraghclub.ie/
http://www.kilmacwalking.com/
http://www.dungarvanhillwalking.org/

These are 3 walking clubs I found in Waterford.

With regards to Meetup.com, if there isn't a group on there that suits you - maybe set one up?
You could create a group based around something that interests you or just a general coffee morning type thing in a local café - wait a couple of weeks and see if anyone else joins the group. If there's nothing around where you are at the moment then you might find it proves popular.
A friend of mine likes to put her wetsuit on and swim in the sea in the winter - mad thing haha - she set up a group for that exact purpose, thought no one would join and it has over 20 members now. So you never know!!

gavindublin

I've alot if friends there that shoot. It's more hill climbing and never shooting than shooting 😀 Nothing with gore or the bumped up telly version. We're friends all over the country with regular trips around for some madness and a bit of dinner after its all done. More than welcome to tag along to see if you fancy it.

se conman

If you could be tempted into a slightly different pass time, check out "Wasteland Airsoft"
Based in Waterford, the sport is an extremely welcoming community with opportunities to travel to lots of other sites across Ireland or just play local. The sport has both male and female, young and old, serious and part timers.
Apart from the Sunday games there are also meet ups during the week, drop into the local shop for a chat. Some of the lads meet for an occasional pint.
All in all it is a very sociable community.

magicmushroom

gavindublin wrote: »

I've alot if friends there that shoot. It's more hill climbing and never shooting than shooting 😀 Nothing with gore or the bumped up telly version. We're friends all over the country with regular trips around for some madness and a bit of dinner after its all done. More than welcome to tag along to see if you fancy it.

That sounds brilliant, I wish I lived in Waterford now!!

KikiDee

Hey OP,

I'm based in Waterford too and have tried meetup. There's groups in Kilkenny that meet in Thomastown which is close enough. I know while some of the groups on there seem a little outlandish and maybe not what would interest you, I'd recommend you look at the events they run. There's one group and I thought 'Nope, not for me' but they do a dinner night once a month, they do a movie night too.

I'm in a similar position as you. I'm single, my friends all have families and I find weekends can get quite boring so I'm super excited to be picking out my first meetup event.

Airyfairy12

Try GirlCrew, they have a group on facebook and a website. People organise get togethers with strangers for gigs, drinks, meetups and lots of other social things, i think its centered in dublin but people from all over ireland are members so maybe if you post something asking for people in your area? its called girlcrew but men can join to if they like. I want to stress its not a dating site and not intended to be.

Daisy78

Airyfairy12 wrote: »

Try GirlCrew, they have a group on facebook and a website. People organise get togethers with strangers for gigs, drinks, meetups and lots of other social things, i think its centered in dublin but people from all over ireland are members so maybe if you post something asking for people in your area? its called girlcrew but men can join to if they like. I want to stress its not a dating site and not intended to be.

Unfortunately they can't, its a women only group, thus the name.

Airyfairy12

Daisy78 wrote: »

Unfortunately they can't, its a women only group, thus the name.

ive seen a couple of men in the group

Daisy78

Airyfairy12 wrote: »

ive seen a couple of men in the group

Some women might bring a guy along to an event now and then but you have to be female to join. I've been a member for a while now and I haven't seen any guys at an organised event. Its why they ask for access to your Facebook account before you join, to prove that your female. I think there might be a men only version of it but don't know for sure.

LegacyUser

Thanks to you all for the messages. I do appreciate them all.

Certainly lots there to look at so tonight I'm going to sit down with a big glass of wine and look them all up properly.

finbarrk

Why not sit at a high stool in your local pub? Get to know the locals.

LegacyUser

@ finbarrk, I couldn't do that in a million years :-)

I think it's fine for guys to do so but I just don't think it's for girls (maybe girls do it?).

I'm looking at doing a night course starting in the next few weeks - hopefully I'll get a place - it's a start :-)