6 weeks not talking to dad

country gal

Country gal, here. My daughter has not spoke to dad in 6 weeks, since he told her about new woman. She attended barnardos 12 months ago for 8 weeks wouldnt open up, I gave tried to encourage her to go back or try jigsaw or rainbows, but she is having none of it. Her dad was out during the week she gave him the 2 fingers when he was leaving, son went and told dad he came back in screaming I thought he was going to hit her, he wanted then to know how I was going to punish her, I told him I was not as its her way of lashing out at him, as thekey workee in barnardos told him he would have to deal with any back lash from the kids as he was telling them about new woman after telling me a previous 10 days he was seeing someone and would only rell kids when and if it was serious, he told daughter she would end up in a psychiatric hospital if she didn't start to talk to him. He dose not want to take sny responsibility for any of this, only this evening daughter went into the local takeaway and 2 minutes later by chance da and brother walked in, she told me when she hot vack into car she didnt talk to brother as he and dad were making snide remarks in front of the staff. 4 weeks ago so started to getanxious and crying for nothing, I asked him, its because his dad and sister are not talking this is effecting him in directly and daughter directly, im trying to keep all happy

Stheno

Moved to personal issues.

OP Seperation and Divorce is for the following:

The Separation and Divorce forum is a place to come and get some civil, mature, constructive and non-judgemental emotional and practical advice and support on the issues and challenges encountered encountered while going through a separation and/or a divorce, perhaps from those going through similar.

I've moved your post from there to Personal Issues as it may be a better forum for you to get advice on how your daughter is coping with your former partner having a new partner.

Rubberchikken

You're daughter is hurting really badly at the moment and i'm sorry you and your children are going through such a tough time.

Get her suport so she has someone neutral to talk to. She doesn't need her dad's angry comments/outbursts. They're only hoing to hurt her and her brother.
They need a calm adult around them who will listen to themand give them a chance to come to terms with what's happening in their family.

PucaMama

You said you thought he was goin to hit her. Has he hit her before? Coming from an often violent relationship with my own father, she won't forgive him for that. And if he has I wouldn't let him near her.

Ave Sodalis

OP, from what you've said, the father is not a very good father and sounds quite nasty. To be honest, I don't think the relationship is repairable. If that is his reaction when she does something as simple (and lets face it, not a big deal given the reason) as giving the finger behind his back, and he's childish enough to start making digs at her in a public place (he's her father ffs, not some teenage girl), I would make efforts to ensure the relationship is not repaired and your daughter never has to see him again. And I say this without knowing if he has followed through with threats to hit her in the past.

PressRun

It doesn't sound like the father is really handling this with much delicacy. Your daughter is obviously having trouble coming to terms with all of this and is behaving childishly, which is understandable as she is the child in the relationship. It's her father who needs to grow up and handle this with more maturity. Flying into a rage, telling her she's going to end up in a psychiatric hospital and making snide remarks about her in public is terrible form from someone who is supposed to be the adult and has a duty of care towards his children.

If her father has actually hit your daughter before, then I would seriously consider whether this is a relationship worth salvaging. He has no business being physically abusive and in that scenario, you should be stepping in to protect her.

PressRun

It doesn't sound like the father is really handling this with much delicacy. Your daughter is obviously having trouble coming to terms with all of this and is behaving childishly, which is understandable as she is the child in the relationship. It's her father who needs to grow up and handle this with more maturity. Flying into a rage, telling her she's going to end up in a psychiatric hospital and making snide remarks about her in public is terrible form from someone who is supposed to be the adult and has a duty of care towards his children.

If her father has actually hit your daughter before, then I would seriously consider whether this is a relationship worth salvaging. He has no business being physically abusive and in that scenario, you should be stepping in to protect her.

country gal

PucaMama wrote: »

You said you thought he was goin to hit her. Has he hit her before? Coming from an often violent relationship with my own father, she won't forgive him for that. And if he has I wouldn't let him near her.

No he hasnt hit her before, as I was hit a lot as a child, and said we'd never do that to our kids, be the oure temper he had it reminded me of as a child before I would be hit.