How come

How come restaurants and cafe's have become eateries now, sounds daft.

Any other new speak that irritates you.

the evasion_kid

bae

MilesMorales1

Everything has to be a wrap now. And it can't just be a chicken butty or something, its got to be pulled chicken, or pulled ham.

Lights On

Back in my day we called them eating holes. None of this restaurant lark.

Rustic replaced home-made or home-style, now artisan has replaced rustic.

Oh, and hand-finished is cropping up a lot lately, I think it means the item is made in a highly automated factory, but someone puts a garnish on it by hand before it's boxed.

RayM

I ordered a mixed grill recently, and it arrived in a frying pan. A frying pan.

RayM

RayM wrote: »

I ordered a mixed grill recently, and it arrived in a frying pan. A frying pan.

And you ordered a grill! I'd be on to them for a breach of the trades descriptions act!

Fleawuss

MilesMorales1 wrote: »

Everything has to be a wrap now. And it can't just be a chicken butty or something, its got to be pulled chicken, or pulled ham.

And such Shyte! Who wants to pull ham. Or chicken? The chicken pullers son. FFS.
Pulled ham. Someone needs a punch in the teeth.

SEPT 23 1989

Fancy names = charge more

MilesMorales1

See this is why I like places like weather spoons. None of this fannying around trying to make things sound fancy, they say its a steak and chips with a drink for €9, thats exactly what you get, no mess.

Fleawuss

And food served on a slate. A piece of fcuking rock. Should I wear an animal skin and growl like a dog.

Bulbous Salutation

MilesMorales1 wrote: »

See this is why I like places like weather spoons. None of this fannying around trying to make things sound fancy, they say its a steak and chips with a drink for €9, thats exactly what you get, no mess.

The food is disgusting sh1t though.

Fluffy Cat 88

RayM wrote: »

I ordered a mixed grill recently, and it arrived in a frying pan. A frying pan.

Hate it when food arrives on a slate/bread board/in a wellington boot etc!

Just serve it on a plate dammit!

If you're on Twitter take a look at #wewantplates - total food fookery in the extreme!

Bulbous Salutation

Fluffy Cat 88 wrote: »

Hate it when food arrives on a slate/bread board/in a wellington boot etc!

Just serve it on a plate dammit!

If you're on Twitter take a look at #wewantplates - total food fookery in the extreme!

Drinks in jam jars as well.

Skylinehead

I prefer "fooditarium" myself.

Some of the daftness makes me laugh though...some desert or cake being enrobed in chocolate

ScumLord

By all accounts Irish consumers are a pretentious lot. We love to think we're buying the fanciest of fancy stuff. Just look at Lidl and Aldi, they came to this country selling us the cheap stuff and had to start stocking fancy stuff in fancy packaging to get us in the door.

So the reason restaurants are calling themselves eateries is because it clearly works at getting people in the door.

Pat Mustard

Was in a restaurant where I given raw steak and had to cook it myself on a hot rock. Mad.

Stheno

Fleawuss wrote: »

And food served on a slate. A piece of fcuking rock. Should I wear an animal skin and growl like a dog.

Not to mention chopping boards and milk in mini bottles. And cocktails served in jamjars!!! wtf!!!

Bulbous Salutation wrote: »

The food is disgusting sh1t though.

Truly foul

kowloon

That's the problem with marketing, you have to come up with new BS to replace the old when it becomes common.

MilesMorales1

Bulbous Salutation wrote: »

The food is disgusting sh1t though.

Well I quite enjoy it.

mynameis905

Bulbous Salutation wrote: »

Drinks in jam jars as well.

Has this started over here? I've only ever seen that on TV shows.

Stheno

mynameis905 wrote: »

Has this started over here? I've only ever seen that on TV shows.

Yeah one of my locals does this

The_Valeyard

mariaalice wrote: »

How come restaurants and cafe's have become eateries now, sounds daft.

Any other new speak that irritates you.

Are you Kneemos in another form?

mynameis905

Anyone eating 'gluten-free' food is either a legitimate coeliac or (more likely) a complete and utter toolbag.

Restaurants using terms like 'Artisan', 'Wraps' or 'Tapas'.

Overly dramatic verbage on menus - 'smothered', 'drizzled', 'decadent'

'Pan-fried' is another pet hate of mine. What else in the name of fúck are you going to fry with other than a pan?

Fluffy Cat 88

Or this type of menu sh1te:

Pan seared fillet of wild (insert random county) duckling with parsley foam served in a rasberry jus with the steamed tears of a rhinoceros.

Rosemary scented leg of pollock with soft crispy pan fried noodles served on a bed of freshly harvested dock leaves smothered in butter.

Funkfield

Fluffy Cat 88 wrote: »

Or this type of menu sh1te:

Pan seared fillet of wild (insert random county) duckling with parsley foam served in a rasberry jus with the steamed tears of a rhinoceros.

Rosemary scented leg of pollock with soft crispy pan fried noodles served on a bed of freshly harvested dock leaves smothered in butter.

Man, you're making my mouth water here

Chancer3001

mynameis905 wrote: »

Anyone eating 'gluten-free' food is either a legitimate coeliac or (more likely) a complete and utter toolbag.

Restaurants using terms like 'Artisan', 'Wraps' or 'Tapas'.

Overly dramatic verbage on menus - 'smothered', 'drizzled', 'decadent'

'Pan-fried' is another pet hate of mine. What else in the name of fúck are you going to fry with other than a pan?

You can deep fry.

Think shallow fry is a thing too.

Big difference between pan fried chicken and deep fried chicken

Ally Dick

The one I HATE is "this video BROKE THE INTERNET". What a ridiculous expression

endacl

I recently had a lovely meat in an eaterie. The eaterie was attached to a sleeperie. I travelled there by driverie. It was a long drive. On the way, I had to stop at a filluperie. As we were staying in the sleeperie, we took advantage of the residents drinkerie. Woke up the next morning and had a lovely dip in the sleeperie's swimmerie.

hairyslug

According to dundrum shopping centre we don't give presents anymore, it's all about the art of gifting

Grandeeod

I remember back 4 years ago when my local at the time started to go down the road of being a gastropub. Suddenly everything was coming out on a chopping board with the "home fries" or "chunky chips" appearing in a mini frying basket.

Almost overnight the menu became (and went up in price)....

Soup of the moment as opposed to just soup or soup of the day.

Panko crumbed Tiger Prawns. FFS Panko is Japanese and there is no way the Prawns are coming from Japan. If they are, they are hardly the freshest frozen. Whats wrong with fcukin Dublin Bay prawns in breadcrumbs???

Spicy (insert county name) farm chicken wings. Utter bull****. They used to serve the very same wings without the county farm tag in a bowl. Now they are like a christmas tree decoration.

Burgers and steaks are named after some obscure craft butcher.

The Thai green curry is "authentic", but its served with poppadums. WTF is a poppadum???? I assume they mean poppadom, but that's not a Thai thing!

The fish and chips is a feckin laugh. Its cod, but its from Kilmore apparently. So these guys are saying that their little gastropub is only buying cod from a supplier (100 miles away) that guarantees it being landed at Kilmore quay. Yeah right. But after you get passed that bit, its smothered in batter made from a craft beer and served with the proverbial lemon slice, sorry I mean wedge.

Two courses used to be 14.95 up to 2012. Since that price they have had a VAT reduction and now two courses are 16.95.

Its all bollox in the food industry and Im not surprised so many of them go out of business. Stupid menus and extremely poor value for money.

mr.anonymous

Gourmet must be French for "+50%"

eviltwin

Vintage or pre loved as an alternative to second hand

Catch up tv.....It's a repeat!!!!

(Re)purposed

Ruu

Gastropub, sounds like some bad Guinness episode or some such!

Grandeeod

WTF is a Roast onion and Mushroom foam??? Sounds like something you'd leave on the path after a serious hurl.

Fluffy Cat 88

mariaalice wrote: »

(Re)purposed

Up-cycled.

AnonoBoy

RayM wrote: »

I ordered a mixed grill recently, and it arrived in a frying pan. A frying pan.

That's the way we serve fry ups (when we've forgot to do the washing up the night before and we're too lazy to do it with a hangover!)

AnonoBoy

Furniture isn't second-hand any more. It's "pre-loved".

That sounds like someone's been humping your couch so it does.

questionmark?

What the hell is wrong with serving food on plates?

I mean it's a feckn plate, it's a well known fact that they are a very convenient for eating food off, they are widely available, easily recognised and are easy to clean. Why the fudge does anyone want to eat off a slate or chopping board?

Grandeeod

Ruu wrote: »

Gastropub, sounds like some bad Guinness episode or some such!

Yeah. Gastro or gastronomic always reminds me of gastro bands or gastroenteritis. Neither of which are pretty. Now when I see signs for a gastro pub I immediately think its a place where I can stuff my face stupid on chemical laden nosh, laden in fat and afterwards feel sick or be poisoned by a meal with a really weird name!

YungKeo

I was looking through the past papers for German leaving cert exams and I came across a text about a ''Nature Cook''. Some of the things on his menu include hay soup and snow soup.

Snow soup. It's just a cold bowl of feckin' water.

I had a quick google just to check if he was actually real and that the state examinations commsion weren't just taking the mick.
If any of ye are handy at the old German ye can have a look here http://www.stefanwiesner.ch

dubscottie

"Experience" and "Content".

Everything is an experience now. "what was your experience of the shops content?"

Content? you mean the sh*t on the shelves that you sell?

I was asked on Facebook to rate my "experience". Didn't mention what one though so posted random **** about all my experiences!..

Feck right off.

It used to be "how was your visit" and "how was our range".

Looking at that #wewantplates on twitter.. If someone stuck that crap in front of me I would be walking out!

Grandeeod

YungKeo wrote: »

I was looking through the past papers for German leaving cert exams and I came across a text about a ''Nature Cook''. Some of the things on his menu include hay soup and snow soup.

Snow soup. It's just a cold bowl of feckin' water.

I had a quick google just to check if he was actually real and that the state examinations commsion weren't just taking the mick.
If any of ye are handy at the old German ye can have a look here http://www.stefanwiesner.ch

That dude is Swiss and crazy. He once made stone soup out of...you guessed it!

He believes cooking is an artform and thats what got us this thread in the first place. I appreciate he is trying to expand his food ideas, but we have to draw the line for the sake of normal humans who just want to eat out in an eaterie.:D

J Mysterio

Grandeeod wrote: »

Panko crumbed Tiger Prawns. FFS Panko is Japanese and there is no way the Prawns are coming from Japan. If they are, they are hardly the freshest frozen. Whats wrong with fcukin Dublin Bay prawns in breadcrumbs???

Panko is just the breadcrumb coating.

Grandeeod

J Mysterio wrote: »

Panko is just the breadcrumb coating.

Yeah. I know. I was making the point of whats wrong with Dublin Bay prawns in breadcrumbs as opposed to panko tiger prawns. Don't go all chefy on me now.:D

Carry

Fluffy Cat 88 wrote: »

Or this type of menu sh1te:

Pan seared fillet of wild (insert random county) duckling with parsley foam served in a rasberry jus with the steamed tears of a rhinoceros.

Rosemary scented leg of pollock with soft crispy pan fried noodles served on a bed of freshly harvested dock leaves smothered in butter.

That's nothing, it's actutally imaginative, especially the steamed tears of a rhinoceros (add: ...on deconstructed triple fried pommes de terre with a burned pizza blanc and slow-roasted squirrel tongues as antipasti )

I do translation work, mostly travel guides (yes, the blue lonely ones, from English to German) and the food poetry describing restaurants drives me insane (same with accommodation, don't get me started).

I'm glad it's no my lack of lingo but that you lot are obviously as puzzled as I am.

Pulled pork is one of my pet hates. I always imagine someone who takes a piece of cooked pork and pulls like a mad man (or woman) at the flesh. Not a very appetizing image.

Alf Veedersane

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Furniture isn't second-hand any more. It's "pre-loved".

That sounds like someone's been humping your couch so it does.

Yeah I dunno about pre-loved but it's the perception about quality with 'second hand'.

That said, I don't think I'll ever be able to keep a straight face when I hear pre-loved after that

monkeysnapper

Pat Mustard wrote: »

Was in a restaurant where I given raw steak and had to cook it myself on a hot rock. Mad.

My fancy brother in law bought us one of these . we have a 1year old child, 3 year old and a 6 year old . some people just don't think things through .

I gave it to guys brother.......mmmmmm yes my other brother in law .. He said it was sh1te .

Fluffy Cat 88

monkeysnapper wrote: »

My fancy brother in law bought us one of these . we have a 1year old child, 3 year old and a 6 year old . some people just don't think things through .

I gave it to guys brother.......mmmmmm yes my other brother in law .. He said it was sh1te .

The 1 year old could probably be cooked on it, but the six year old would be a bit big... :pac