Writing wedding vows

SecretBride

I know this is probably the stupidest thing that anyone has ever asked on a forum but I'm struggling writing my vows!

We are having a humanist ceremony and I am happy to be a bit soppy but I have no clue what to write in my vows. I'd like to do something really personal rather than the 'I take you, blah, blah....' version but where do I start and what do I put in them??

DivineGranny

I had a lot of trouble with my vows too, it took a few months to get the final version, and that was going through a fair few drafts.

In the end, I looked online for tips for writing vows, and tailored mine to make them more personal.

tread_softly

We had a humanist ceremony too and wrote our own vows.

I struggled for a while trying to get my head around the kind of "style" I should write them in as I was the same as you and didn't want the I take you kind of thing.

In the end, myself and the other half each wrote out essentially our feelings for each other, how happy he makes me, little favourite memories I have of us together, what I'm looking forward to in the future etc. I also wrote a few promises to him

They weren't traditional vows in that sense, more like expressions of our love for each other in our own style.

For example, he has introduced me to watching wrestling which he's loved since a child, so I wrote in my vows that I am looking forward to watching Wrestlemania with him next year and all the years to come

We kept them secret from each other until the day and he had me convinced that his were going to get a better reaction from our family and friends but I think mine garnered more tears and laughs, haha

After we said them, the celebrant did the whole official "there is no impediment to your marriage" bit and that was that.

Just approach them not as "vows" as such, it's much easier that way. Look at them as what you've loved about each other and what you're looking forward to in married life together plus any promises you want to make to him.

Oh and fun fact, I wrote mine in the sitting room and was in tears when I finished. He wrote his when he was sitting on the jacks!!!!!! Must be where he gets his inspiration though as there wasn't a dry eye in the house when he said his

SecretBride

That breaks it down really well thank you....we got our completed ceremony back from our humanist yesterday and it's gorgeous....really personal and flows beautifully so we want to do the ceremony justice too....this will help us structure it better :-)