feeling low

dollydimples82

Hi, not sure if this is the right place but im looking for some advise. Im in a long term relationship and through complications I feel stuck in a rut. I have a full time job that includes shift work and lately I am just feeling tired and lack interest in a lot of things, I would like to lose some weight to but every day I say I will tomorrow but I don't even try. I lack confidence and self esteem and am quite a shy person, I don't think its depression but I feel if I don't do something soon it will be. Where do I start?:(

LegacyUser

Hi dollydimples82,

I could have written your post at the start of this year.

After Christmas I took a look at my life and decided I needed to make some changes. I decided to work on one thing at a time.
I was very overweight and did not look or feel good. I waited until the end of Jan and I joined Slimming World. I learned how to eat properly and that I could still have a life when losing weight. I started to do a small bit of walking every day.

I started to make more of an effort with my freinds and contacted some people I lost contact with.
In April I joined a gym and got a plan done up a by a trainer. I started to go to the gym about 3 to 5 days a week. It got me up each morning. Through the gym I made some new friends.

I have lost 4 stone in weight along with inches off my body. I look and feel so much better. I have made new freinds and my social life has improved. I am currently doing a course which will help me get work. I am far happier than I was a few months ago.
I won't say it was always easy but I am so glad I made the changes that I did.

I would advise you to start making small changes every week over a period of time. You mentioned that your in a long term relationship. Are you happy in your relationship? I know that when some people are in a bad relationship or going though a bad patch they eat.
Life is to short to be in unhappy relationship.

In regards to your work are you happy there? I know we all have bad days in work but if you wake up every moring saying I hate this I would start to look for another job. A few years ago I was in a job I hated with the boss from hell. I started to look for another job. I was so glad to leave this job when I got a better one.

If your feeling tired always I would go to your doctor and get blood test to check your iron, b vitamins level, thryoid and hormone level are as they should be. If any of these are not at the correct level you can feel tired. These can all be corrected.

I would also get out in daylight every day at this time of the year as it will help you feel better. Do you normally feel this way around this time very year? If this is the case I would get a lamp for sad (sesional affective disorder). These lamps mimic sunlight and you sit in front of them each day. Some people find these very good.

I would advise you just to take one step at a time. Don't be afraid to ask people for help if you need it. As you start to make the changes you need to make it will help you feel better.
I hope this helps you.

littlemouse22

dollydimples82 wrote: »

Hi, not sure if this is the right place but im looking for some advise. Im in a long term relationship and through complications I feel stuck in a rut. I have a full time job that includes shift work and lately I am just feeling tired and lack interest in a lot of things, I would like to lose some weight to but every day I say I will tomorrow but I don't even try. I lack confidence and self esteem and am quite a shy person, I don't think its depression but I feel if I don't do something soon it will be. Where do I start?:(

I agree with the above post, take things one step at a time.

You mentioned you're in a long-term relationship, have you talked to your partner about this? Do you go on regular dates together? You say you don't have much of an interest in things anymore, maybe it's a thing that you find things to be repetetive? A suggestion would be to try new things as a couple like little breaks away, even going on small walks together, trying out new restuarants etc. These little things don't sound like much but it means something new and new is always exciting!

As for losing weight. We all say we will start, tomorrow, next week, next month etc. but you have to try get yourself in the right frame of mind - I want to do this and I'm going to do this! My advice would be to start concentrating on cutting out the bad food first like we all have guilty pleasures. I'm the worse for picking in the evening but simples changes like changing a pack of crisps (or 3:pac:) to a mandrin/orange and apple. Also completly agree with the above post - Slimming world is brilliant!
It's not considered as a diet, it's more of a lifestyle change and you never feel hungry as there is plenty of free foods to snack on when you please
And sure we all have days we fall of track, binge eat but sure look you have to treat yourself!

For your own self-esteem and confidence, don't be afraid to treat yourself to a new hair do/clothes. Things that make you feel good about yourself.

Also don't be afraid to talk to your partner/friends/family if you are feeling down., they may have some good advice for you as they would know you alot more and its always good to have someone there to listen.
It's best to talk about these things rather than bottle up.

Hope this advice helps

dollydimples82

Thanks I appreciate your advise and am going to look into joining my local slimming world. I am happy in my relationship it's just a complicated one but we will get it sorted. Thanks again and baby steps for me.

bonyn

If you feel the onset of depression, it's a good time to see your GP.
I don't like the idea of weightwatchers, because it's a community obsessed with weight despite what they say. Just try to introduce some moderate exercise a few times a week, ideally with a friend, and cut out the processed food (esp white bread and pasta) and sugar.

dollydimples82

Thank you bonyn, I don't want to go down the road of been medicated for depression, I have seen what that can do to a family, so want to try and "lift" myself out of the rut I am in