My wife hearing scared voices / souls at night.

LegacyUser

My wonderful Wife and the Mammy to my beautiful children has told me that she is having trouble with sleeping recently. She say she has experienced for most of her life voices / spirits / souls attempting to speak / communicate with her at times and that it has become more intense this last few years. To my knowledge she'd had a few ghosty experiences but nothing serious in the past. Odd feelings here and there.

She says if she drinks then she can fall asleep but if she does not then these many voices (for want of a better word) are so loud and intrusive that they can keep her awake and it is exhausting. She is worried that this could put her down the path of wanting to drink more, which we do occasionally a few times a week anyway but not to excess.

She suffers from anxiety / panic attacks but these have bee well controlled the past few years with a wee bit of medication.

She says the voices are of scared, questioning individuals and asking / begging her for help. Whilst not malevolent, she's very worried that if there can be good voices, there certainly could be bad ones.

She does not want to hear them, help them or have anything to do with them. She just wants to find a way to turn them off and she is willing to try (but not publicly or locally) to get some sort of help.

This is a revelation to me that I did not expect. I'm a skeptical person / doubting thomas kind of guy at the best of times and while I don't believe in it, i don't close my mind to the possibility and I believe she does believe if you know what I mean.

So I'm asking for a little advice. I don't want her to have to go to a doctor over this. As far as the rest of our 16 year relationship has been there has been nothing bad at all or harmfulness in any way. Your usual ups and downs over the usual things but we have wonderful kids that she is bringing up perfectly and I am well looked after!

Obviously some folks are going to point the way of a Mental Health issue and say go to the doctors etc but I wonder has anyone had any experience of this themselves? Or a family member or friend with it? I do not want her to feel as if there is something wrong with her, sure many people believe in spirits, angels etc etc

Is there an alternative way perhaps to deal with this and to help her?

Any and all advice welcome! Thanks so so much.

iusedtoknow

Hubbyman wrote: »

She suffers from anxiety / panic attacks but these have bee well controlled the past few years with a wee bit of medication.

So I'm asking for a little advice. I don't want her to have to go to a doctor over this.

Obviously some folks are going to point the way of a Mental Health issue and say go to the doctors etc but I wonder has anyone had any experience of this themselves? Or a family member or friend with it? I do not want her to feel as if there is something wrong with her, sure many people believe in spirits, angels etc etc

Is there an alternative way perhaps to deal with this and to help her?

Firstly, this must be a shock to you - however....

I simply do not believe in any spirit realm and consider myself a skeptic so you can take my advise with that in mind.

You say that she suffers from anxiety and panic attacks. These are a form of mental illness that a doctor can help her with. The voices etc could be another symptom of mental health issues that we as a country so long tried to offer more explanations for but are issues that drugs help with.

There is no shame or indignity with getting some help for these issues. She needs to talk to a specialist - mental health is a spectrum - and as such there are all manner of treatments and help that she can get. Talking to her doctor is the first step. The stigma is slowly lifting of having mental health issues to such a degree that doctors treat it as seriously and compassionately as any other form of health issue.

I'm sorry that you are going through this, but you also need to keep in mind that as much as you want to believe that she is hearing voices from "beyond" you need to also consider the fact that this is a medical issue that the medical system can help you with.

meeeeh

I doubt you will get many replies of people hearing voices and it being a consequence of supernatural activity. By all means explore the alternatives but to make sure take/send your wife to gp asap. Untreated mental illness can have a lot more serious consequences than any ghost can cause.

Faith

It sounds like your wife is having auditory hallucinations. This can be indicative of a number of things, but no matter what, you need to bring her to her GP as soon as possible. I work in the mental health area and I have seen this manifestation a number of times. Bringing her to her doctor is the right thing to do; ignoring it, or indulging the belief that it's 'ghosts' or 'spirits' will do nothing but ultimately harm your wife.

The best way for you to act is in a supportive and open manner. There is unfortunately still a big stigma around mental illness in certain groups, and it's important not to buy into that. Support and compassion are what she needs from you, and she needs professional help from a doctor, not a psychic/priest/shaman/anything else outside of the medical field.

Best of luck with it. It's not an easy position to be in.

Hubbyman

Hubbyman wrote: »

I don't want her to have to go to a doctor over this. As far as the rest of our 16 year relationship has been there has been nothing bad at all or harmfulness in any way. Your usual ups and downs over the usual things but we have wonderful kids that she is bringing up perfectly and I am well looked after!

Obviously some folks are going to point the way of a Mental Health issue and say go to the doctors etc

not being funny here, but yes. absolutely yes.

franklyon

Hi hubbyman, I don't know if its of any help to you, but I watched a documentary on youtube recently about a woman with the same gift as your wife, she said in the video that she thought she was going crazy too but learned after a while how to deal with them. It was something along the lines of I will communicate for one or two hours a day but never after a certain time in the evening.
I would be a sceptic but after seeing things with my own eyes which I won't go into here I very much believe there is something else out there and your wife is one of a very few people who can pick up on that.
Maybe give that a go and see if it works.

Mark Tapley

I would agree with the other replies recommending a visit to a GP. Also whatever the classification of the problem adding alcohol would definitely not be recommended.

meeeeh

Btw OP I don't want to be patronizing, but it's not hard to deduct hearing voices is usually some sort of psychological symptom. It might be the best to eliminate statically most likely cause. I won't tell you to abandon looking for alternative solution but please try first the most researched and regulated option. They are safer than following the advice you get from YouTube that you don't know where it's coming from. It's a lot easier to prey on vulnerable if you are operating in unregulated field. So do the safe things first.

Lone Stone

I have high anxiety issues, and occasionally when I would stop taking my meds for it which is a low dose anyway, I would hear a voice call as if it was in trouble or needed help so it could be from some sort of acute anxiety, if I was you I would ring around try find a gp who has an interest in anxiety issues or audio hallucinations and make an appointment, some have no clue and a bad gp experience about really doesn't help things.

uck51js9zml2yt

While I believe in a spiritual realm the fact that your wife has no control over the voices she's hearing would steer me more toward mental health issues.
Your wife and probably you with her need to see her GP and get a referral to mental health services.
The stigma that was there is slowly going away and with the right treatment and support you an all lead a normal life.
Facilities are improving. I do know Beaumont hospital have a very good in patient service at the Aishling Centre. The days of portrane and grangegorman are gone thankfully.

Oryx

The problem with bringing her to a spirualist is that it may actually make things worse by making her focus on it and think more about it. She needs to learn to turn all this off. I also encourage medical advise from a sympathetic gp in the first instance.

I wonder if her auditory stuff and her anxiety are coming from the same place. Seeing as alcohol dulls it. Get her to see a doctor and also encourage her to take up mediation and mindfulness if she thinks it might help. Also being physically active and having real world tasks to focus on might stop her 'listening' for these voices.

But medic first!!

LegacyUser

Hubbyman wrote: »

My wonderful Wife and the Mammy to my beautiful children has told me that she is having trouble with sleeping recently. She say she has experienced for most of her life voices / spirits / souls attempting to speak / communicate with her at times and that it has become more intense this last few years. To my knowledge she'd had a few ghosty experiences but nothing serious in the past. Odd feelings here and there.

She says if she drinks then she can fall asleep but if she does not then these many voices (for want of a better word) are so loud and intrusive that they can keep her awake and it is exhausting. She is worried that this could put her down the path of wanting to drink more, which we do occasionally a few times a week anyway but not to excess.

She suffers from anxiety / panic attacks but these have bee well controlled the past few years with a wee bit of medication.

She says the voices are of scared, questioning individuals and asking / begging her for help. Whilst not malevolent, she's very worried that if there can be good voices, there certainly could be bad ones.

She does not want to hear them, help them or have anything to do with them. She just wants to find a way to turn them off and she is willing to try (but not publicly or locally) to get some sort of help.

This is a revelation to me that I did not expect. I'm a skeptical person / doubting thomas kind of guy at the best of times and while I don't believe in it, i don't close my mind to the possibility and I believe she does believe if you know what I mean.

So I'm asking for a little advice. I don't want her to have to go to a doctor over this. As far as the rest of our 16 year relationship has been there has been nothing bad at all or harmfulness in any way. Your usual ups and downs over the usual things but we have wonderful kids that she is bringing up perfectly and I am well looked after!

Obviously some folks are going to point the way of a Mental Health issue and say go to the doctors etc but I wonder has anyone had any experience of this themselves? Or a family member or friend with it? I do not want her to feel as if there is something wrong with her, sure many people believe in spirits, angels etc etc

Is there an alternative way perhaps to deal with this and to help her?

Any and all advice welcome! Thanks so so much.

Don't know if this is any help.

I sometimes, but not very often hear voices in my head before sleep, like a very crowded room, I can sometimes follow one of their conversations, but when I awake I can't remember what they were saying. It does not happen often and does not frighten me or affect my sleep. I put it down to my mind processing the days conversations and things I did and the 'conversations' are just part of this. As I say this does not happen very often to me. I find when a lot of people are nagging and talking non stop - I hear there voices repeating and asking me questions at night. (I tell them where to go ) I feel this is just a bit of stress..

Speak to a GP obviously, just a thought that hopefully will help in some way...

celligraphy

My sister 21 suffers from the same thing for the last few years hears scary stuff sees scary spirits and things didn't believe her one bit until we went through her camera one day loads of pics of screaming ghosts in the background absolutely terrifying anyways. I wish I could show but I can't.

We get the house she lives in blessed every year and we had to have a priest and nun hold an excersiom in the house sorry is spelt wrong.

But to be sure get your wife to a gp incase it should be schizophrenia or similar mental health problem.

But don't disregard what she says either.

faceman

Sorry to hear of you and your wife's ordeal OP

First and foremost, is to get your wife to talk to her family GP. While the the whole situation may seem fantastical and I see some people are already calling it a gift in this thread, it's vitally important than the medical treatment is pursued. In all likelihood, this will help to address the root of the issue.

While I have beliefs in the the supernatural the vast majority of time everything can be explained. I'll share a story from a friend's family that will give a sense of how powerful and mysterious our minds can be on topics like this.

My friend's mother (let's call her Jane) was being visiting by 'the devil' most nights in her home. She was terrified and credited the Virgin Mary as the reason she could handle it as the Virgin Mary also appeared. She could describe in vivid detail what they looked like and the things they said.

Jane was seen to by doctors who couldn't explain it nor did pills help, and long story short, she ended up being brought into full time care. The 'visits' continued. A new consultant however was not convinced that the devil was visiting her or that she had mental issues. Another long story short, they did some tests on her thyroid and discovered an issue. After treating it the visits went away. There was no devil or no Virgin Mary. It was a harrowing ordeal for the family that took place over a couple of years. Fortunately the medical profession were able to help.

brevity

Do these voice happen all during the day or at night? Perhaps sleep testing might be a good idea? Could it be a type of sleep apnea or a night terrors?

JustTheOne

Google sleep paralysis.

Hypnagogic and hypnopompic visions and hearing a demonic voice when resistance is attempted are symptoms commonly experienced during episodes of sleep paralysis. Some scientists have proposed this condition as an explanation for reports of ghost parasites and alien visits.

This is what she has. Happens when drinking alcohol.

mod note: This is a diagnosis, and is an unqualified guess based on the OPs post only. OP knowing you've already read this please consider this is one of many possible diagnoses that only a GP and a specialist may consider and reject but only on careful and thourough examination of your wife.
Poster please don't repeat such a post again or it will result in an infraction / ban

Nabber

OP always best to work from the most likely causes first. The fact that alchol helps her to sleep would suggest that it's mental health. Drinking to sleep is also destructive to your wife's health. So spirits/ghosts or mental health, she still needs medical advice on a health approach to sleeping.

KomradeBishop

They're just auditory hallucinations OP, not some kind of spiritual/ghostly nonsense: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Auditory_hallucination

These can be brought on by something as simple as drinking excessive amounts of coffee, or stress/sleeplessness, so they are not necessarily a mental health problem on their own, but a GP should check if they could be the sign of other underlying mental health problems.

Maybe sleeping with white noise (e.g. a noisy or loud fan on in the background) might help reduce this for her?

LegacyUser

I think it's best to preface what I'm going to say with pointing out that, to me, beliefs in a god or spirits are right up there with leprechauns and unicorns.

Now that we've got that out of the way, I think you should be very conscious that hearing voices is, in my limited knowledge, a hallmark of a particular mental illness. I think there can be auditory issues too - but my main point is that your wife needs to see a medical professional, and soon. She is clearly finding it hard to cope, and tbh I'd class trying to mask it with alcohol right up there with pinning it on 'spirits'. Your wife needs help. Medical help, and your help and understanding.

I can understand to some extent why you're clutching onto some supernatural thing, well that would mean that it was *them* (the spirits) and not her. But she needs immediate medical help. Don't let your reflection of her own hope that she have to go to the docs cloud your judgement.

Do you have any trusted friends of family that you can talk ho early to?

dudara

Posters - I have deleted several off topic posts around paranormal topics.

Please make no more suggestions around psychic / spiritualist / paranormal causes. It is detracting from the topic. The first course of action is to seek proper medical advice and doing anything else could be putting a person's health at risk.

dudara

LegacyUser

Thank you all for your responses.

I love my wife completely and want to help her in this matter. I will approach it from the Auditory Hallucination point of view I think and that it could stem from her current anxiety issues.

Perhaps I was hoping that from her small belief in the paranormal that going this route may help fix / distract from the issue in a easy way. From everyone's replies, this seem a much more scary situation that could escalate. I'll let you know how we get on as this could be of help to others in similar situations.

Thanks a million for your advice.

InTheTrees

Hubbyman wrote: »

...it has become more intense this last few years.

She suffers from anxiety / panic attacks but these have bee well controlled the past few years with a wee bit of medication.

Whats the "wee bit of medication"?

There's anti-anxiety meds that could have some powerful side effects.

LegacyUser

I've been on anti-anxiety medication for 2 years that gave me absolutely horrific nightmares.

The thing that stands out to me is that she says she needs a drink in order to sleep.
I've suffered with depression, panic attacks and sleep problems in the past and would use the "I need a drink to sleep" excuse a lot. She needs help with this before it becomes a problem imo.

I'm not a believer in the paranormal at all. Either way she needs to see a GP before it gets a lot worse.

Taltos

mod note
InTheTrees - Please note per our charter there is no room here for medical advice. As such please don't ask again what medication someone is on as being blunt usually when asked it just leads onto the aforementioned medical advice. Also offering a diagnosis as above is considered a cardable/bannable offense in PI/RI, please take some time now to read our charter before you post again.

OP - in line with that I am not approving your post.

Mr. Incognito

Alcohol is a neuro toxic suppressant.

It dulls the physical receptors in the brain.

If this "turns off" the voices it points to a physical problem.

If the voices were external then being drunk would make no difference. If I turn on the radio I can hear it drunk or sober.

Get her to a GP pronto.

LegacyUser

Op just wanted to chime in to say I hear things sometimes and have all my life. I didn`t really know what this was till I joined an epilepsy group, years after my epilepsy diagnosis, and found that this is an auditory seizure, a type of simple partial seizure. Mine were worse at night, as are all my seizures and most other people say the same. I don`t lose consciousness at all and there are many different types of epilepsy. I can`t drink, as is common with people with epilepsy, but its actually the next day when the alcohol leaves your system that you have an increase in seizures. That`s not to say that`s what is happening to your wife at all just to add that many physical things could be causing this and I would look at that possibility first. I would ask first for a referral for a neurologist and hopefully they could exclude a lot of physical things with an MRI and EEG (she would need to try to get an EEG at night when she is hearing these voices to rule out seizures). Neuro`s have heard all sorts, this won`t be a first for them so don`t worry about being honest. If she doesn`t seem stressed and is functioning well enough to mind children and a home I wouldn`t allow her to be disregarded as just having psychological problems and would insist she was properly evaluated to exclude other causes. Good luck OP!

Mourinho

OP another thing to consider is it may be a physical issue and not a mental one either. Lots of different voices, smells, visions can be caused by brain problems as well.

So along with whatever mental help you'll seek make sure to have the physical accessed as well.

Taltos

mod note
JustTheOne, Old Jakey - both of your posts were removed. Medical diagnoses are not permitted here. So soon after a mod warning above this would normally result in an immediate infraction.

mg1982

I think hearing voices at night time before you go to sleep is more common than people believe. I myself hear voices at night time and it can be scary. When i told my doc about them he said they were hypnogagic hallucinations and it is quite a common thing. If they are a real problem for her than she should get help as psychosis can be terrifying for anyone to deal with.

I have, on occasion, suffered from auditory hallucinations whe dropping off to sleep, or waking up in the middle of the night. They are as real as if they were actually happening. I hear normal stuff, like dogs barking, children shouting, birds singing, normal daytime noises. Now and again I've been awoken very suddenly by someone shouting my name very loudly, or asking me questions. Sleep hallucinations are very normal, and nothing to worry about, though they can be extremely annoying and keep you awake, to the point that you're better off getting up again to break the waking dream, as they sort of are, then having to go back to bed again and hope they don't repeat.

These occurrences are fairly common, to some people more than others but I think everyone experiences something like it at some time. There would be no harm speaking to a doctor if it really is becoming so troublesome - especially if she is worried about becoming dependant on alcohol for sleep.

NIMAN

I would say the gp visit is vital.

This is a physical or mental problem, nothing to do with ghosts, spirits, the afterlife etc, and putting any further time into that side is dangerous IMHO.

nikkibikki

She definitely needs to see her GP to look into this for her.

<SNIP> let's leave supernatural aspects out of it

You are obviously right behind her supporting her so she is lucky to have you OP.

sashafierce

This post has been deleted.

Dogwalker

Check out Jacqui Dillon, Harry Gijbels and Lydia Sapounen, OP. There's a very good rte Doc On One about Jacqui.
Hearing voices is supposed to be more common than you think. But studies also show that it's the same part of the brain that lights up as when you are talking to yourself. It's very convincing and after all, seeing or hearing is believing. Most of us, when we go through tough times, don't have it coming back at us on loudspeaker seemingly from a third party. So learning coping strategies like through CBT will be important. Religion actually comes into its own here. Litany and spiritualism go well with this situation. Staying physically healthy is important for dealing with stress. Drinking to cope is not part of that. Eat healthy and get exercise early, in fresh air and sunlight.
Try Hearing Voices Ireland.
Qualifier: I dont hear voices, but am close to someone who does. It's tough being an adult. We're the ones who are supposed to make everything ok. But that's life. There are no fully perfect solutions. But it will be okay, with help. Good luck