Only Physically Attracted to People?

LegacyUser

I don't know what it is but whenever I'm attracted to someone since probably last March, it's been purely physical attraction. When a guy I like texts me, I'll smile as soon as I see his name, I get excited about talking and meeting with him, but I don't get butterflies or anything? And I never think about him during the day, where as I used to have the guy I liked on my mind beforehand? It's like being excited for talking to a really hot friend, I guess?

Whatever I feel is purely physical. I've been attracted to 10-or-so guys in this time. From October to March I didn't actually meet a man I was attracted to in any sense, although I was met a lot of people most weeks. Before that, any feelings for guys I had was never physically driven and 99% of the time purely emotional (liking them for who they are, until we started going out and then I'd become more physically attracted).

Is this normal? I've 21 and you'd think it was happening for ages, but it feels like it. I'm tired of this thing that suddenly happened where I'm only being physically attracted to guys and interest fading quickly. I've met one man in the past few months who I was attracted to both physically and emotionally (but the first few hours of knowing him was purely physical attraction), saw him a second time and he wasn't feeling into it so that was that. Other than that, I'd go on a date with a guy who I was physically interested in and it'd never develop that I'd be interested in them for who they are, which kills the physical attraction quite quickly too.

Is there anything I can do to change this?

Jotunheim

For the life of me I can't see the problem. You're attracted to different people in different ways or to different degrees and just lately you haven't went anyone who ticks the boxes for you. Sounds pretty normal to me and I can't see what you'd need to change.

Gavlor

You could probably have worded the title differently!

Rachiee

Really nothing odd going on here, you just haven't met someone you're really into in a while. It's not like you've lost the ability to fall for guys you just haven't fallen for any lately, it's no big deal you'll meet someone that does it for you. and it'll be all the more noticeable.

charlietheminxx

Ah here OP, you're making an issue where there is none! For a couple of years in my early twenties I dated guys I didn't fancy that I hoped I would (because they were perfect in other ways and I hoped an attraction would spark), guys I was crazy attracted to that I knew I could not have a proper relationship with, nice guys, bad guys, tall guys, short guys, funny guys, ambitious guys, you name it and I probably dated/hooked up with/had brief relationships with them.

Going out with all the wrong people is fun when you're young. It helps you figure out what you like and don't like, what your dealbreakers are and you should be just sitting back and enjoying it all. Very few people find someone that's perfect for them at the age of 21. Of course there are exceptions, but for the most part it's a time where you're still figuring yourself out.

Embrace it OP, just relax and see what happens, you don't have to overthink it. While I am very happily committed now, I don't think I would be had I not embraced my freedom and figured out what I wanted. I still think back on my early twenties as some of the most fun I've ever had.

cazzer22

I don't understand this at all, I'm sorry.