Paddy Englishman, Paddy Irishman and Paddy Scottish-man

Winty

Why do so many people tell this joke wrong?

The premise of the Joke is an Irish man called Paddy is smarter in some way than his friends the Englishman and the Scottish-man.

To tell the joke correct its " Paddy the Irishman an Englishman and a Scottish-man .......

Correct me if I am wrong

Menas

Nah....every one knows the joke is "Paddy Englishman, Paddy Irishman and Paddy Scotsman".

I know because my grandda made up the very first one...or so he told me.

Valetta

Winty wrote: »

Why do so many people tell this joke wrong?

The premise of the Joke is an Irish man called Paddy is smarter in some way than his friends the Englishman and the Scottish-man.

To tell the joke correct its " Paddy the Irishman an Englishman and a Scottish-man .......

Correct me if I am wrong

You're correct....ed

anto9

>>The premise of the Joke is an Irish man called Paddy is smarter in some way<<

Really ? .....I always heard it with the Oirish man being the stupid one .(these jokes are usually told by English people after all ) .

osarusan

Winty wrote: »

Correct me if I am wrong

Sure, no problem.

Winty wrote: »

The premise of the Joke is an Irish man called Paddy is smarter in some way than his friends the Englishman and the Scottish-man.

This is wrong, isn't it? In any such joke I've ever heard, Paddy Irishman is the idiot along the lines of Kerryman/blonde woman.

Winty

anto9 wrote: »

>>The premise of the Joke is an Irish man called Paddy is smarter in some way<<

Really ? .....I always heard it with the Oirish man being the stupid one .(these jokes are usually told by English people after all ) .

Here is a correct example

Paddy the Irishman an Englishman and a Scotsman were reading a newspaper article about which nationalities’ brains were for sale for transplant purposes. An Irishman’s or a Scotsman’s brain could be bought for €500 but an Englishman’s brain cost €10,000. That proves,’ said The Englishman, ‘that Englishmen are much cleverer than Irishmen or Scotsmen.’
‘No it doesn’t,’ said Paddy, ‘it just means that an Englishman’s brain has never been used.’

whomitconcerns

A Scottish man, an Englishman and an Irishman were sitting in a pub discussing the best pubs around. The Englishman says, ”There’s a pub in the West Midlands where the landlord buys you a drink for every that you buy.” The Scot is not impressed and says, ”That’s nothing! In the Highlands every time you buy a drink the landlord buys you five.” At this point the Englishman is fairly impressed. The Irishman, totally unimpressed, says ”That’s nothing. In Dublin there’s this pub where the landlord buys your drinks all night, and then when the bar shuts he takes you into a room and makes love to you.” The Scot and Englishman are well impressed and ask if the Irishman goes there a lot. He replies ”No, but my sister told me about it.”

Winty

osarusan wrote: »

Sure, no problem.

This is wrong, isn't it? In any such joke I've ever heard, Paddy Irishman is the idiot along the lines of Kerryman/blonde woman.

Its all about what country the person telling the joke is from....
So if an Irish person is telling the Joke "Paddy" is the hero, if its being told by an English man in a bar in London the English man is the hero and so on

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/An_Englishman,_an_Irishman_and_a_Scotsman

ScumLord

Winty wrote: »

Here is a correct example

No, a correct example is..

Paddy Irishman, Paddy Englishman and Paddy Scotsman are walking through the magic forest when they come across a magic slide that grants them a wish when they slide down it. Paddy Englishman goes down the slide and says "tea" and lands in a big vat of the finest English tea. Paddy Scotsman slides down the slide and says "Whiskey" and lands in a big vat of the finest scotch whiskey. Paddy Irishman goes down the slide and says "weeeeeee"..

Winty

whomitconcerns wrote: »

A Scottish man, an Englishman and an Irishman were sitting in a pub discussing the best pubs around. The Englishman says, ”There’s a pub in the West Midlands where the landlord buys you a drink for every that you buy.” The Scot is not impressed and says, ”That’s nothing! In the Highlands every time you buy a drink the landlord buys you five.” At this point the Englishman is fairly impressed. The Irishman, totally unimpressed, says ”That’s nothing. In Dublin there’s this pub where the landlord buys your drinks all night, and then when the bar shuts he takes you into a room and makes love to you.” The Scot and Englishman are well impressed and ask if the Irishman goes there a lot. He replies ”No, but my sister told me about it.”

Thats a funny joke but if your an Irish man telling it you should say it was the English man's sister

Winty

ScumLord wrote: »

No, a correct example is..

Paddy Irishman, Paddy Englishman and Paddy Scotsman are walking through the magic forest when they come across a magic slide that grants them a wish when they slide down it. Paddy Englishman goes down the slide and says "tea" and lands in a big vat of the finest English tea. Paddy Scotsman slides down the slide and says "Whiskey" and lands in a big vat of the finest scotch whiskey. Paddy Irishman goes down the slide and says "weeeeeee"..

How is that correct

What is a Paddy Englishman is he English or Irish?

podgemonster

I think this is correct....

Paddy Irishman, Paddy Englishman, Paddy Welshman and Paddy Scotsman are flying over Europe with a plane load of supplies from their own country. The plane gets into difficulty and the captain orders the men to loose some cargo.

Paddy Scotsman grabs the pallets of Whisky and fires it out of the plane
"We have plenty of them in Scotland, we can get some more" he says.

Paddy Welshman pushes a pallet of Welsh beer overboard.
"We have plenty of the stuff in Wales, we can get some more" he says.

The Paddy Irishman grabs a hold of Paddy Englishman and throws him outta the plane to his death.

"Why did you do that?" asked Paddy Scotsman

Paddy Irishman, with a dead look in eyes, replied "He killed my wife."

ScumLord

Winty wrote: »

Thats a funny joke but if your an Irish man telling it you should say it was the English man's sister

Winty wrote: »

How is that correct

What is a Paddy Englishman is he English or Irish?

I always took them as 3 idiots. The Irishman is always the but of the joke.

hatrickpatrick

anto9 wrote: »

>>The premise of the Joke is an Irish man called Paddy is smarter in some way<<

Really ? .....I always heard it with the Oirish man being the stupid one .(these jokes are usually told by English people after all ) .

Nah, it's Paddy Englishman who wishes his friends back to the desert island, who gets his bollocks cut off, who asks when the Queen's Legs will be opening for a drink, who shouts "weeee" while going down the "wish for something" slide, etc

Source: My name is Paddy, I've been raised on these jokes for decades.

osarusan

Polish fella walks into a bar with a big pile of dogsh!t in his hands and says 'hey fellas, look what I almost stepped in'

topper75

Thanks for all the jokes lads but - the OP is actually right.

NachoBusiness

ScumLord wrote: »

I always took them as 3 idiots. The Irishman is always the but of the joke.

Sometimes, just sometimes, it's not..

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are sitting in a bar. Suddenly a fly dives into their beers. The Englishman says, "Barman, a fly just dove into my beer. Bring me another." The Irishman says "Ah, to hell with it" and downs his pint, fly and all. The Scotsman pulls the fly out of his beer, shakes it up and down and screams: "Spit it out damn you! Spit it out!"

pappyodaniel

osarusan wrote: »

Polish fella walks into a bar with a big pile of dogsh!t in his hands and says 'hey fellas, look what I almost stepped in'

I heard this joke in Raising Arizona.

osarusan

pappyodaniel wrote: »

I heard this joke in Raising Arizona.

Yep, that's where I remember it from, except it was 'Polak'.

TheOtherBloke

osarusan wrote: »

Yep, that's where I remember it from, except it was 'Polak'.

Why is there never a Welshman?

Your Superior

TheOtherBloke wrote: »

Why is there never a Welshman?

Balls deep in sheep, no time to be in a joke

major bill

The Irishman is always seen as being the gob****e of the 3, this is the whole point of the joke, anyone that puts the Irishman first or second has ruined the joke.

TheLastMohican

There was an Irishman, an Englishman and Claudia Schiffer sitting together in a train compartment going west to LA. The train tore into a tunnel and everything went black. Suddenly there was this kissing noise and whack - the sound of a really loud slap. When the train came out of the tunnel, Claudia Schiffer and the Irishman were sitting as if nothing had happened and the Englishman was rubbing a large palm-size red mark on his cheek. The Englishman was thinking: "That Paddy bloke must have kissed Claudia Schiffer who hit out, missed him and whacked me instead". Claudia Schiffer was thinking "The English fella must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Irishman and got slapped for it". And the Irishman was thinking: "Fecking great craic. The next time the train goes through a tunnel I'll make that kissing noise and slap that English bastard again".

C.K Dexter Haven

major bill wrote: »

The Irishman is always seen as being the gob****e of the 3, this is the whole point of the joke, anyone that puts the Irishman first or second has ruined the joke.

Irishman always last but not always the gobsh1te though- sometimes the punchline has some wit/insight attached to it that puts Irishman in a good/clever light- the joke below can be found in all sorts of guises- I first heard this one as a Jewish joke:


Irishman, Englishman and a German are caught in Saudi Arabia drinking. "Under Saudi law you are sentenced to 30 lashes then deported.

Before you begin you are entitled to something on you back, what would you like?" said the prison guard to the Englishman just before lashing him.

The English man, being a bit of a cricket fan, asked for linseed oil. When they lashed him on a post and let him go to catch his flight back to London he groaned and crawled to the airport.

Next came the German. "Under Saudi law you are sentenced to 30 lashes then deported. Before you begin you are entitled to something on you back, what would you like?" said the prison guard

"Nothing" said the German and, after receiving his lashes spat on the ground, called the prison guards Schisers and started off towards the airport.

The guards then came to the Irishman. "Under Saudi law you are sentenced to 30 lashes then deported.

Before you begin you are entitled to something on you back, what would you like?"


"Oh", replied the Irishman,...









"I'll take the German on my back".

moc moc a moc

Winty wrote: »

What is a Paddy Englishman is he English or Irish?

He's mixed-race.

C.K Dexter Haven wrote: »

"I'll take the German on my back".

Eh... no, it's supposed to be the Englishman.

fryup

back in the days of the french revolution

paddy englishman, paddy scotsman and paddy irishman are all sentenced to death by guillotine.

paddy englishman steps up to the guillotine, lays his head down and looks up as the guillotine blade makes its way down. A millimetre before it hits his neck, it stops. Now the law of the guillotine is such that if it doesn't work the first time, you get off scot free. So up he gets up and runs away.

paddy scotsman gets up on the podium, lays his neck on the block looks up and waits quietly. The guillotine blade starts to tear its way down and then suddenly stops. can't believe his luck, he gets up and runs away, free as a bird.

finally paddy irishman, steps up onto the stand, lays his neck on the block, looks up, pauses and says to the executioner "hold on i can see whats making it stick"

C.K Dexter Haven

moc moc a moc wrote: »

He's mixed-race.



Eh... no, it's supposed to be the Englishman.

RUBBISH!

fryup

TheOtherBloke wrote: »

Why is there never a Welshman?

cause the joke will take too long

dubscottie

Scotsman, Englishman & Irishman walk into a bar..

The barman asks "is this some kind of joke"..

Ill get me coat.

RossyG

TheOtherBloke wrote: »

Why is there never a Welshman?

Because you don't get Welshmen called Paddy.