Advice

LegacyUser

Not ready=not into you?

Had a good few dates with a guy.
Everything going great and he made it obvious he was interested and then out of the blue says above.
I behaved incorrectly and told him we could see but that prob has pushed him away now.

Flippyfloppy

Society12 wrote: »

Not ready=not into you?

.

Yep. Pretty much. At least you know and you can move on.

LegacyUser

I'm not sure how you think you "behaved incorrectly". The fact is, as you've presented it, he said he was interested, then pulled back; that's just messing, he's already started wrecking your head and it's no loss if he's gone. If he comes back, I suggest you don't let him mess you about and at the first sign of it, either call him out on it and get a proper answer, or be gone.

LegacyUser

He is talking with his ex he tells me.
I asked him this before and said no
Asked him today said since then he was.
Not sure I believe it.

Merkin

I think you should let this one go. He has categorically said he is not ready (fill in actual meaning here) so there is no point in pursuing the whys and wherefores of who he is or isn't talking to. Now that he has said the relationship won't be going ahead there is no point in having further contact with him.

Sunflower 27

As said above, let this one go. You want a man that wants to get to know you and spend time with you. If he is not wanting to do that, you are flogging a dead horse.

Delete his number, plenty more out there

CaraMay

Society12 wrote: »

He is talking with his ex he tells me.
I asked him this before and said no
Asked him today said since then he was.
Not sure I believe it.

He's trying to give you the hint and tell you it's not working. Op gather your pride up and just walk away like he is asking you to do. It's none of your business who he is talking to btw

FizzleSticks

This post has been deleted.

LegacyUser

He wants to remain friends.
I wish I didn't like him so much
I wish he hadn't of led me on.Although I don't think he meant to.
I wish he hadn't of been so nice but I guess it's time to cut all ties.
I really thought there was something there.

Neyite

Society12 wrote: »

He wants to remain friends.

= if the ex is not up for trying again, I'd like you as a stand in until she changes her mind.

Nah Op, not worth it.

LegacyUser

If you stay friends with this guy it's not going to end well for you. Being "Not ready" is a deceptive sort of a phrase. It implies that if you wait around for long enough, "ready" might happen. Not a chance. He's telling you that he's not into you and doesn't see this lasting. You still seem to find it hard to believe that this is over and that there is no hope. How long is he broken up with the ex? If it isn't too long this sounds like a classic rebound situation. His enthusiasm in the early days might have been him trying to convince himself that he had moved on and was over his ex. He should be able to talk to whoever he wants to but it's probably not a good sign that he's in touch with his ex.

He's being unfair on you by suggesting you stay friends. What is there to be gained by you being his friend? You don't want to be his friend. All it will do is give you false hope and prolong the hurt of this break up. It will also hurt you when he gets back with his ex or finds a new woman he's more than ready for. Cutting ties is easier said than done but you will be glad you did it.

LegacyUser

True and what makes it worse, he broke it off with her

LadyFenghuang

Society12 wrote: »

Not ready=not into you?

Had a good few dates with a guy.
Everything going great and he made it obvious he was interested and then out of the blue says above.
I behaved incorrectly and told him we could see but that prob has pushed him away now.

My take is when you meet the right person you feel ready.

You are being strung along. Make a break and decide what you want for you.

You deserve someone who steps straight up to the plate.