Cricket

porsche959

Cook out in the final over 240-7 odds on at stumps. Now almost 2 years since Pringle scored more than 105 equalling D'olivera in the '88 Durban Cup.

Lucifer MorningStar

What the fook are ya on about ?

Kermit.de.frog

I don't like cricket...


I HATE IT!

catallus

Netherland, Joseph O'Neill.

InitiumNovum

OP, if I could be so bold as to give you a monocle-pop warning, I'm afraid there are too many plebeians on this forum to understand what you're saying.

Smiles35

Goodnight, Cricket

Ruu

Time for tea.

porsche959

Beaufort the 3rd opener to get 3 ducks in series on 44 to one against versus the West Indies. Previously: Elliot (Aus, 1898-99)

Dozen Wicked Words

You're not wrong.

Pherekydes

You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in the side that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out. When they are all out, the side that's out comes in and the side that's been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out.

When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in. There are two men called umpires who stay all out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out.

When both sides have been in and all the men have out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game!

falan

Watching cricket is like watching golf. In other words it's like watching paint dry.

kneemos

Pherekydes wrote: »

You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in the side that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out. When they are all out, the side that's out comes in and the side that's been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out.

When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in. There are two men called umpires who stay all out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out.

When both sides have been in and all the men have out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game!

Suppose an umpire needs to pee?

Oh not another one of those "this sport is great, that sport is awful" threads.

Pherekydes

kneemos wrote: »

Suppose an umpire needs to pee?

I think all the batsmen have cups. Maybe the umpires do too. Either that or it's the job of silly mid-on to, eh, bail (excuse the pun).

jaykay74

Wheres the silly point ?

Valetta

Tried to catch one in Spain one night on the way home from the pub- wanted to see what it looked like.

Spent ages crawling around on the grass. Could hear it but couldn't catch the little fecker.

kneemos

Valetta wrote: »

Tried to catch one in Spain one night on the way home from the pub- wanted to see what it looked like.

Spent ages crawling around on the grass. Could hear it but couldn't catch the little fecker.

Should have used a bat.Knock it all out for six or whatever.

Valetta

kneemos wrote: »

Should have used a bat.Knock it all out for six or whatever.

Couldn't find a bat. I don't think they live in warm climates.

bnt

falan wrote: »

Watching cricket is like watching golf. In other words it's like watching paint dry.

You're doing it wrong. Cricket in summer is a day out in the sun: bring a slab of beer, a friend and a book. Occasionally, someone throws a ball at someone else, and if someone shouts "HOWZAT!", clap a bit.

bnt

What, no-one crowing about England getting their ... wickets handed to them today? At this rate, they'll have to follow on and the Ockers won't even need to strap on pads again.

fryup

cricket?? meh posh proddy sport

pickarooney

fryup wrote: »

cricket?? meh posh proddy sport

Probably 90% Hindu/Muslim

fryup

Posh Hindu/Muslim then

bnt

Yeah, gotta love all those "posh" cricketing "proddies" playing in the streets of India and Pakistan.

Is it still "proddy" (?) when England's losing?

SEPT 23 1989

as big as hurling in this country before the ethnic cleansing started

pickarooney

SEPT 23 1989 wrote: »

as big as hurling in this country before the ethnic cleansing started

Kilkenny were the dog's bollocks at the old cricket.

CrabRevolution

SEPT 23 1989 wrote: »

as big as hurling in this country before the ethnic cleansing started

Can I ask what ethnicity were massacred/deported?

Massimo Cassagrande

CrabRevolution wrote: »

Can I ask what ethnicity were massacred/deported?

Whites lads.

Valetta

CrabRevolution wrote: »

Can I ask what ethnicity were massacred/deported?

Of course you can.

philstar

CrabRevolution wrote: »

Can I ask what ethnicity were massacred/deported?

prods

riffmongous

philstar wrote: »

prods

Flimshaw, that wouldn't explain the switch from cricket to hurling in kilkenny

riffmongous

I think any real Irish cricket fan would be more concerned about our own shocking loss today than having a laugh at England, not to mention how thick you'd seem

bnt

Seriously? Religion, ethnic cleansing ... hurling? That's just not Cricket, folks.

edit: just saw the result against Hong Kong at Malahide. Just 5 runs more would have done the trick, but it wasn't to be.