Outcalls to hotel rooms

Heat_Wave

Hi everyone.

This isn't a personal issue as such. But I cannot post it in After Hours as I would like honest answers.

My best friend is a masseuse. She does outcalls to hotel rooms where she massages men on their hotel bed. Sometimes they don't book her till as late as 10pm at night. I find this extremely strange. She has been in a relationship with her boyfriend for about three years now and most people will probably say this is none of my business but I often wonder is something else going on in these hotel rooms?

The reason I am asking here is because I am quite naive and gullible. I asked her about the legality of these outcalls and she said they are totally illegal. She has to 'run' into the lift apparently in order to get up to the bedroom.

Is this a common thing?

OP I don't really see how this is a personal issue

Is it that you're concerned about her wellbeing?
Or are you concerned she is telling you it's innocent and it isn't?

Heat_Wave

bluewolf wrote: »

OP I don't really see how this is a personal issue

Is it that you're concerned about her wellbeing?
Or are you concerned she is telling you it's innocent and it isn't?

The latter I guess.

It is most fitting with this forum as I am quite a naive person and would be considered quite innocent/oblivious to what goes on around me.

When I am in her company it is all I can think about. 'Is my friend an escort?' etc. Therefore I am asking here. If this was the case I don't think I would like to continue my friendship with her tbh. I can hardly ask her though.

athtrasna

OP I think the writing is on the wall here. A genuine masseuse wouldn't be doing calls like these.

Mr. Incognito

Sounds like she is an escourt to me.

Heat_Wave

She told me that her boyfriend sometimes collects her from the hotels?

bee06

Would you stop being her friend if you knew she was an escort?

athtrasna

Heat_Wave wrote: »

She told me that her boyfriend sometimes collects her from the hotels?

That wouldn't necessarily be unusual. He may know what she does, believe it or not some guys can overlook their partner being an Escort.

You said this girl is your best friend, so you've obviously known her a long time. Is this a new "job" for her?

mikemac1

I would think she is an escort, yes. As for the boyfriend collecting he must know. She is probably pulling in a sizable amount of cash.

With tax in Ireland it's not worth killing yourself with a second job. Here is a tax free cash job everytime. The couple can have an amazing lifestyle or plan for a house deposit. The job will end sometime, maybe a year or two

A lot of assumptions in my post, just my 2c

Heat_Wave

athtrasna wrote: »

That wouldn't necessarily be unusual. He may know what she does, believe it or not some guys can overlook their partner being an Escort.

You said this girl is your best friend, so you've obviously known her a long time. Is this a new "job" for her?

It's really strange. She works as a masseuse in an actual spa during the week. We were out one night and she casually mentioned been in a hotel. Myself and another girl (also her friend) were quite taken aback and said 'you gave a massage in a hotel?' and she laughed and said yes. We asked how long she has been doing this for and she said two years!

There are so many things that don't add up for me. I asked if she brings a fold up massage bed to the hotel and she said no because she doesn't have one. She said she gives the massage on the actual hotel bed. Beds are very low down, you would really damage your back if you were to give a massage like that. You also wouldn't be able to walk around the bed and massage from the other side if the bed was a double.

Another thing, there seems to be no set price for her. She phoned me earlier and said 'you won't believe how much the guy paid me last night'. It turns out he paid her €350 for a two hour massage in the penthouse of a very exclusive hotel in Dublin.

I don't know why but I am finding this very frustrating because we have been very close friends for about 7 years now and I feel now like I don't even know the girl.

athtrasna

To me it sounds like the money is the attraction, spa jobs aren't particularly well paid, and what might have started as a genuine call out has turned into something more. Nobody pays €350 for a massage without benefits.

strandroad

To be honest if she was a full on escort she wouldn't be boasting about it so much. There is interest in room service if you can afford it for sure, and she might have started giving them happy endings (hand jobs) hence her income. She might not see it as escorting at all if you asked her but she sure loves the money...

Penny Tration

None of us can tell you for sure, but it sounds as though she's an escort.

Why would you not continue the friendship if she were?

Tbh, if you'd end the friendship over her 'profession,' I'd suggest you end it regardless. Your friendship shouldn't be conditional. You can disapprove, but to end a friendship over it? Well, best ending it now since there are strings attached to your friendship.

fits

^ everybody has strings attached to their friendships! Would you remain friends with someone if you heard they were involved in something unethical or criminal, (not necessarily escorting) even if they seemed really nice and normal?

hagoonabear

in London outcalls for massages in hotel is well known for businesmen just looking for legit massages

Penny Tration

fits wrote: »

^ everybody has strings attached to their friendships! Would you remain friends with someone if you heard they were involved in something unethical or criminal, (not necessarily escorting) even if they seemed really nice and normal?

If it's not dangerous to other people (ie, not drug dealing, drink driving), yes, because how another person makes their money has no bearing on a friendship, if they're not harming another person.

Heat_Wave

If word got out that she was an escort then I would not like to be associated.

'Most' people would frown upon that kind of thing.

Heat_Wave

I just googled her phone number and an add appeared on gumtree for outcall massages. At the bottom it says 'this is not a sexual service so no private numbers please'.

So perhaps this hotel outcall service is a 'thing'?

tomwaterford

Heat_Wave wrote: »

If word got out that she was an escort then I would not like to be associated.

'Most' people would frown upon that kind of thing.

So you'd only be friends with her so long as others approve??

What difference does it make what others think??
If you don't want to be friends with someone let it be for a better reason than others disapprove

athtrasna

Heat_Wave wrote: »

I just googled her phone number and an add appeared on gumtree for outcall massages. At the bottom it says 'this is not a sexual service so no private numbers please'.

So perhaps this hotel outcall service is a 'thing'?

A full body massage in the Merrion hotel costs €100. Why would anyone pay €350 for something a few floors up that was just a massage? Not saying she was in the Merrion but just using a five star hotel price as a comparison.

Heat_Wave

tomwaterford wrote: »

So you'd only be friends with her so long as others approve??

What difference does it make what others think??
If you don't want to be friends with someone let it be for a better reason than others disapprove

Ok Tom let me ask you then. Would you go out with an escort? And if your girlfriend was an escort, would you have no problem in telling friends when they ask that she is in fact an escort?

tomwaterford

Heat_Wave wrote: »

Ok Tom let me ask you then. Would you go out with an escort? And if your girlfriend was an escort, would you have no problem in telling friends when they ask that she is in fact an escort?

Meh depends on weather she was an escort before we went out....like I've a few wans I'd be friends with who used work as escorts to get money for collage etc when they were younger....depsnt bother me if I'm honest....who am I to judge???
Nothing wrong two consenting adults like!!
It's not up to me to be telling people what others work at/used work at!!!

But is it not your friend you are asking about??
Not your girlfriend??

mikemac1

No need to be so judgemental OP. She is your friend. If you want to drop her then do so but you're not her father or her boyfriend so this doesn't affect you much at all.

Is it a moral line she has crossed here? Meh, she could wear smart office clothes everyday selling payday loans bringing desperate people to ruination but that's a fully legal job and you get to say down the pub you work in financial services.

Heat_Wave

mikemac1 wrote: »

No need to be so judgemental OP. She is your friend. If you want to drop her then do so but you're not her father or her boyfriend so this doesn't affect you much at all.

Is it a moral line she has crossed here? Meh, she could wear smart office clothes everyday selling payday loans bringing desperate people to ruination but that's a fully legal job and you get to say down the pub you work in financial services.

Very quick to jump on the bandwagon Mike. I highly doubt you would date an escort, would you? If your parents were to ask what her occupation was, would you say escort with pride? Doubtful.

The fact that she is my friend makes no difference.

I'm all for people having their own opinion but don't preach what you don't practice.

Penny Tration

Heat_Wave wrote: »

Very quick to jump on the bandwagon Mike. I highly doubt you would date an escort, would you? If your parents were to ask what her occupation was, would you say escort with pride? Doubtful.

The fact that she is my friend makes no difference.

I'm all for people having their own opinion but don't preach what you don't practice.

She's not your girlfriend, so your comparison is off.

You're not having sex with her, so you're not risking STIs, like a sexual partner would. That's the risk for sexual partbersof escorts.

Your issue is purely a moral one, you don't want to be associated with her if word gets out about her occupation.

Ditch her. She deserves better.

Heat_Wave

Jenny Thalia wrote: »

She's not your girlfriend, so your comparison is off.

You're not having sex with her, so you're not risking STIs, like a sexual partner would. That's the risk for sexual partbersof escorts.

Your issue is purely a moral one, you don't want to be associated with her if word gets out about her occupation.

Ditch her. She deserves better.

It's exactly the same.

I would imagine escorts would have very strict rules about contraception so you can't pull that one.

Mike can answer for himself.

Heat_Wave

Heat_Wave wrote: »

It's exactly the same.

I would imagine escorts would have very strict rules about contraception so you can't pull that one.

Mike can answer for himself.

Heat wave, you came to this forum asking for advice
Turning on posters and accusing them of "pulling" anything is unfair considering they are taking time to reply to you and try help you with your issues
Tone it down please

Heat_Wave

bluewolf wrote: »

Heat wave, you came to this forum asking for advice
Turning on posters and accusing them of "pulling" anything is unfair considering they are taking time to reply to you and try help you with your issues
Tone it down please

Apologies if I came across aggressive. I was responding to Jenny's 'Ditch her. She deserves better' comment, which I found to be very harsh.

I came here asking if people thought it sounded like my friend was an escort. I am now been called 'judgemental' and all sorts. Bizarre

Penny Tration

Heat_Wave wrote: »

It's exactly the same.

I would imagine escorts would have very strict rules about contraception so you can't pull that one.

Mike can answer for himself.

It's not exactly the same at all.

Yes, SOME escorts are strict about condoms, but condoms fail, we all know this.

You, as a friend, are not risking sexually transmitted infections, as a partner would.

You, as a friend, are not expecting monogamy and committed sexual intimacy, as a partner would be.


There is a vast difference between friendship and a relationship, much different boundaries, both sexually and emotionally, as I'm sure you know.

However, you're using this relationship comparison to defend your moral indignation about something that has zero effect on you personally (unlike a sexual partner), so I doubt you'll accept that.

I wish you all the best in your decision.

I'm going to bow out now, but before I do - instead of searching for her online presence (which is seriously creepy behaviour) - ask her outright. If she's a friend, you owe her honesty in your dealings with her.

Heat_Wave

Jenny Thalia wrote: »

It's not exactly the same at all.

Yes, SOME escorts are strict about condoms, but condoms fail, we all know this.

You, as a friend, are not risking sexually transmitted infections, as a partner would.

You, as a friend, are not expecting monogamy and committed sexual intimacy, as a partner would be.



There is a vast difference between friendship and a relationship, much different boundaries, both sexually and emotionally, as I'm sure you know.

However, you're using this relationship comparison to defend your moral indignation about something that has zero effect on you personally (unlike a sexual partner), so I doubt you'll accept that.

I wish you all the best in your decision.

I'm going to bow out now, but before I do - instead of searching for her online presence (which is seriously creepy behaviour) - ask her outright. If she's a friend, you owe her honesty in your dealings with her.

She has a boyfriend. If she is an escort which most people seem to think she is, then I would have no respect for a girl that would cheat on their boyfriend like that.

I would also not like to be associated with someone who sells their body as a living. I would not like others to think I did the same.

You're entitled to your opinion as am I.

I received a good response and have my answer now. I will ask her outstraight. A mod can close this now.

IlmoNT4

I think if she is a escort then she would know better to not talk about it and certainly not to tell people about where shes going and whats she doing... or else shes just plain naive.

OP ask yourself, who gives 350 euro for a massage in the middle of the night where the masseuse has to make a "run" for it into the lift so not to be stopped by security? Think about how this might be arranged... do these men call down to reception and they contact your friend for a massage and she rocks up without a table?
Who exactly do you call in the middle of the night if you want a genuine massage? ...You already know the answer, there isnt anyone to call.

That she does this thing in the middle of the night, without a massage table, while running into lifts to make 350 euro for a 2 hour massage all points to that your friend is probably offering some kind of massage/sex offering. It may not include penetrative sex or it may not. The point is, thats her business. If you have a problem with it, I'd suggest asking your friend straight out but if it was me I wouldnt bother, I already know the answer. I'd just hope that my friend stayed safe

Meauldsegosha

Heat_Wave wrote: »

She has a boyfriend. If she is an escort which most people seem to think she is, then I would have no respect for a girl that would cheat on their boyfriend like that.

I would also not like to be associated with someone who sells their body as a living. I would not like others to think I did the same.

You're entitled to your opinion as am I.

I received a good response and have my answer now. I will ask her outstraight. A mod can close this now.

Her boyfriend is aware of what she is doing. Their relationship is no concern of yours. You do come across as very judgemental in your posts.