Asking a friend out

Bpmull

Hopefully I can get some advice on this.

I've been friends with a girl for years basically we were neighbours when growing up now we are both in college. For the last good while as in years I've been thinking of asking her out. I see her regularly enough but there has always been one thing stopping me from asking her. Asking a girl out is fine she says no you move on grand. The problem with this girl is my parents and her parents are really good friends and they would meet up twice a month or so. I know her parents really well and get on well with them. In other words I would see her, her parents / siblings regularly enough.

So basically taking this into consideration if I asking her out and she says no will this just end up as one big awkward mess. Should I ask her out or just say nothing considering the situation?

McDermotX

Exactly the right thread to post this in.

This will go very well. I'd suggest taking all the 'advice' on without question, from 'just do it' to 'blast her with piss'.

BoJack Horseman

You get one shot at life buddy.

Moderate embarrassment is just temporary, especially if your two families are close.

Aenaes

Bpmull wrote: »

The problem with this girl is my parents are her parents

Against the law, I'm afraid.

Move on my friend and un-think those impure thoughts.

I'll pray for your twisted soul.

Sheep Lover

Ask her father for permission first

Señor Fancy Pants

Do it or it will always be one of those things you wish you did.

If it doesn't work out, at least you gave it a shot.

Best of luck.

Mehaffey1

Truffle Pig wrote: »

Do it or it will always be one of those things you wish you did.

If it doesn't work out, at least you gave it a shot.

Best of luck.

Have to agree there, regret runs deep in years to come and that becomes your burden to bear

keeponhurling

Yep, embarrassment is only temporary

smcgiff

Just hang back and watch other guys chat her up and she can tell you afterwards what they did to her.

Or you could ask her out.

Btw, what college is selling their students? That's the bigger issue here :pac:

Hidalgo

smcgiff wrote: »

Just hang back and watch other guys chat her up and she can tell you afterwards what they did to her.

Or you could ask her out.

Btw, what college is selling their students? That's the bigger issue here :pac:

Colleges are pulling in finances from whatever avenue they can nowadays.

Dr Turk Turkelton

Op watch the Inbetweeners and follow the exact same steps as Simon uses to woo Carly DiMarco.
Report back to us daily with how the love is blossoming.

Roselm

Bpmull wrote: »

Hopefully I can get some advice on this.

I've been friends with a girl for years basically we were neighbours when growing up now we are bought in college. For the last good while as in years I've been thinking of asking her out. I see her regularly enough but there has always been one thing stopping me from asking her. Asking a girl out is fine she says no you move on grand. The problem with this girl is my parents are her parents are really good friends and they would meet up twice a month or so. I know her parents really well and get on well with them. In other words I would see her, her parents / siblings regularly enough.

So basically taking this into consideration if I asking her out and she says no will this just end up as one big awkward mess. Should I ask her out or just say nothing considering the situation?

You should prob get a mod to.move this to Relationship Issues!!!

worded

If she has no feelings for you and just wants you as a friend you may strain things.

Google friend zoned, that's where you want to get away from

Try and be as sure as possible she is into you before making a romantic move

Satriale

Stop thinking about it, just do it.

sh1tstirrer

smcgiff wrote: »

Just hang back and watch other guys chat her up and she can tell you afterwards what they did to her.

Or you could ask her out.

Btw, what college is selling their students? That's the bigger issue here :pac:

Maybe the op could buy her back from the college and if things don't work out he could always sell her on again.

Specialun

Grow a pair OP

worded

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201302/avoiding-the-friend-zone-becoming-girlfriend-or-boyfriend

Sir Osis of Liver.

Drop the hand on her first and see how she reacts.

retroactive

I wouldn't do it without warning though. Maybe step forward a little and then do it. You run a risk of her not thinking it's you "asking her out."

keeponhurling

In before somebody mentions anal....

sh1tstirrer

Op if you know her that long you surely have some idea whether she will want you or not.

Penny Tration

I told someone I liked them, when we worked right next to each other, got the same bus to work and back every day and our friends and family knew each other a little.

The embarrassment would have been almost unbearable if he didn't reciprocate, so I made sure I was drunk first.

Night out with friends. He was in his house having drinks with his mates. I texted him, telling him to come to the pub. I said that in return, I'd give him a kiss. He asked why I'd do that. My reply was 'because I fancy the arse off of you.' so classy and ladylike :pac:

Then he told me he'd liked me for ages, I sent him a picture of my boobs and a year and a half later, we're moving in together :pac:

If I hadn't gone for it, he never would have. He told me that straight out. He didn't realise I liked him, so resigned himself to just being friends.

If I hadn't done it, I'd massively regret it now.

Whatever the outcome, if you've wanted to ask her out for YEARS, that feeling isn't going away easily, so do it.

Señor Fancy Pants

Oh yeah, just make sure you are willing to risk the friendship that you have now, for the potential of what might or might not be in the future.

If you ask her out, she says yes. All goes well but then crumbles. She might never want to be friends again. How would you feel about that?

If you ask her out, she says no. There might be awkwardness and it might put her off being friends, even though ye don't see each other every day.

But for fcuk sake do it anyway, put this off for another few years and you will be kicking the church door in at her wedding and telling her you want her.....and that's soooo cliche nowadays

Dr Turk Turkelton

Jingle_Balls wrote: »

I told someone I liked them, when we worked right next to each other, got the same bus to work and back every day and our friends and family knew each other a little.

The embarrassment would have been almost unbearable if he didn't reciprocate, so I made sure I was drunk first.

Night out with friends. He was in his house having drinks with his mates. I texted him, telling him to come to the pub. I said that in return, I'd give him a kiss. He asked why I'd do that. My reply was 'because I fancy the arse off of you.' so classy and ladylike :pac:

Then he told me he'd liked me for ages, I sent him a picture of my boobs and a year and a half later, we're moving in together :pac:

If I hadn't gone for it, he never would have. He told me that straight out. He didn't realise I liked him, so resigned himself to just being friends.

If I hadn't done it, I'd massively regret it now.

Whatever the outcome, if you've wanted to ask her out for YEARS, that feeling isn't going away easily, so do it.

Pics or it didn't happen!

sh1tstirrer

This thread is turning into dear Frankie

mfceiling

Jingle_Balls wrote: »

he told me he'd liked me for ages, I sent him a picture of my boobs

:eek:

Sir Osis of Liver.

Dr Turk Turkelton wrote: »

Pics or it didn't happen!

Yeah,share it with the group.

Satriale

Jingle_Balls wrote: »

I told someone I liked them, when we worked right next to each other, got the same bus to work and back every day and our friends and family knew each other a little.

The embarrassment would have been almost unbearable if he didn't reciprocate, so I made sure I was drunk first.

Night out with friends. He was in his house having drinks with his mates. I texted him, telling him to come to the pub. I said that in return, I'd give him a kiss. He asked why I'd do that. My reply was 'because I fancy the arse off of you.' so classy and ladylike :pac:

Then he told me he'd liked me for ages, I sent him a picture of my boobs and a year and a half later, we're moving in together :pac:

If I hadn't gone for it, he never would have. He told me that straight out. He didn't realise I liked him, so resigned himself to just being friends.

If I hadn't done it, I'd massively regret it now.

Whatever the outcome, if you've wanted to ask her out for YEARS, that feeling isn't going away easily, so do it.

A year and a half is a long time to wait for a look at boobs. Misread .
Glad it worked out!

Bpmull

worded wrote: »

If she has no feelings for you and just wants you as a friend you may strain things.

Google friend zoned, that's where you want to get away from

Try and be as sure as possible she is into you before making a romantic move

I suppose this is a lot of the problem too. It is quite hard to gauge whether she has any interest in me that way or not. We are not best friends either it's not like we are in constant contact with each other but I do see her fairly often.

I do feel I would regret not asking her as it is only a matter of time before she finds someone and gets into a serious relationship with them. I'm sure I could live with the embarrassment of her saying no as it would eventually pass.

Now for the hard part of bringing myself to ask her. As its a question that she might of never expected to come up in conversation. Although at least if I ask her I won't have any regrets.

DoYouEvenLift

I dunno op, could have bigger consequences than the normal embarrassment you get when rejected that you can just brush off. What if she rejects you and tells the parents? It's a whole other ball game then. That'll make them feel superior to your parents and they'll snicker at how they produced offspring that's clearly higher quality than their friends since they rejected you. Think about it, do you really want to gamble on ending your parents friendship and bi-weekly tea sipping gossip sessions?...Just ask her out for fuk sake.

honey79

Jingle_Balls wrote: »

Then he told me he'd liked me for ages, I sent him a picture of my boobs and a year and a half later, we're moving in together it.

Best answer ever

worded

Jingle_Balls wrote: »

I told someone I liked them, when we worked right next to each other, got the same bus to work and back every day and our friends and family knew each other a little.

The embarrassment would have been almost unbearable if he didn't reciprocate, so I made sure I was drunk first.

Night out with friends. He was in his house having drinks with his mates. I texted him, telling him to come to the pub. I said that in return, I'd give him a kiss. He asked why I'd do that. My reply was 'because I fancy the arse off of you.' so classy and ladylike :pac:

Then he told me he'd liked me for ages, I sent him a picture of my boobs and a year and a half later, we're moving in together :pac:

If I hadn't gone for it, he never would have. He told me that straight out. He didn't realise I liked him, so resigned himself to just being friends.

If I hadn't done it, I'd massively regret it now.

Whatever the outcome, if you've wanted to ask her out for YEARS, that feeling isn't going away easily, so do it.

What kind of lens did you use? Any filters? Photography is the best

Penny Tration

Dr Turk Turkelton wrote: »

Pics or it didn't happen!

My mates have pics of my ridiculously happy face in the pub on that night, and he still has the pic I sent him. I don't think boobs are appropriate for here though

smcgiff

honey79 wrote: »

Best answer ever

You mean... Best BOOBS ever.

Penny Tration

mfceiling wrote: »

:eek:

I was really drunk

Hey, it worked.

Dr Turk Turkelton

Jingle_Balls wrote: »

My mates have pics of my ridiculously happy face in the pub on that night, and he still has the pic I sent him. I don't think boobs are appropriate for here though

Yeah maybe your right on an open forum and all... Just pm them so and I will confirm for the rest!

Soups123

There is no real embarresment to be had if you do it right, maybe just an ego dent!

Ask her right and worst she can do is say no and take the compliment you pay her.

Given the closeness of family I would do it straightout and not when under the influence!

Penny Tration

Dr Turk Turkelton wrote: »

Yeah maybe your right on an open forum and all... Just pm them so and I will confirm for the rest!

He has the pic, I don't, I've changed phones 6 times since then. Sorry

smcgiff

Jingle_Balls wrote: »

I don't think boobs are appropriate for here though

We'll be the judge of that.

Jury back in... It's grand

worded

Specialun wrote: »

Grow a pair OP

Off topic - How is gardening going to help him?

seamusk84

Valentine's day soon. Ask her if she have plans for it. When she says no, ask would she go for dinner as you don't either.

Can't fail, Winning!

Or else go with the drop the hand and gauge reaction as suggested by another poster. You will know the craic then.

One eyed Jack

Bpmull wrote: »

So basically taking this into consideration if I asking her out and she says no will this just end up as one big awkward mess. Should I ask her out or just say nothing considering the situation?

Given that you've known this girl since childhood OP, you should be able to come up with reasons why you think she should want to go out with you. If you can't think of any reasons why she should want to go out with you, then I'd say you're better off just remaining friends.

smcgiff

worded wrote: »

Off topic - How is gardening going to help him?

Grow a pair Of Pansies, is what he meant.

Present to friend once in bloom.

Guaranteed she'll be all over the OP.

Roger Hassenforder

Any inkling whether she has "feelings" for you OP?

You've nothing to lose except being in the friend zone - win win

Bpmull

Roger Hassenforder wrote: »

Any inkling whether she has "feelings" for you OP?

You've nothing to lose except being in the friend zone - win win

I've found it a bit hard to read whether she does or not over the years there has been signs alright. But then it's hard to know if they were genuine or if I was completely misreading them.

I think it's nearly harder to ask the question when you know the person so long and it could put her in a difficult position which is what I don't want to do if she has no interest Id much rather she says that straight out rather than packing it out to save my feelings. Maybe if I ask her and she has a completely shocked look then it probably means she only thought of us as friends and that would answer my question anyway without her saying anything.

Wibbs

Just ask her. Every day you don't is another day you're pining away, wasting time and emotionals, when you could be either A) being with her if she says yes, or if she says no being open to someone else. As for losing her as a "friend". As it is you're not her friend as you're harbouring one sided feelings for her(she may be too, but you won't know until...). Plus you dont see her that often so what have you got to lose?

Lia_lia

I think you need to send her a picture of your boobs, op.

Aenaes

To be fair, that Valentine's Day suggestion is pretty good. Even if she turns that down you can say you only wanted to have dinner as friends thereby saving some embarassment/awkwardness for both of you.

Hangballlouie

Ask her Da for a straightner. Once you give him a hiding, you'll then become the dominant male in her life. That's how to win her heart.

Johngoose

A big No!Terrible idea,trust me.

Bpmull

Johngoose wrote: »

A big No!Terrible idea,trust me.

Why do you think it is ?