Very small wedding

Ruby31

We're having immediate family only to the registry office, followed by a meal in Dublin City.

To anyone who did the same, or is planning the same for their wedding, did you / are you hiring a photographer?

Also, to anyone who married with small children, did you bring the kids to the ceremony & meal? I'm really unsure of what to do. My youngest will be 2.5yrs and there's a chance he could be a disaster at the meal! Problem is that all the family will be with us, so no babysitters available!

Lastly, is it odd to stay in our own house together the night before the wedding?! The logistics of doing the traditional sleeping separately, etc is stressing me out. All my friends went down the traditional, big white wedding day, so I've no-one to ask.

lynski

Do your own thing, whatever works for you. We married on a beach alone, 10 yrs ago, still delighted we did our own thing and our marriage is no better or worse then those who did the big day out.
Could a family member be 'in charge' of your lo on the day, taking them for a walk if necessary etc, and taking them overnight to give you a 'wedding night' ? Maybe do a sleepover in the weeks before to cement the norm?

lazygal

Suit yourselves. We stayed together and got ready together on the morning. One regret I have is not getting at least one professional shot of our civil ceremony, so I would recommend doing this. I know of a very good city centre based photographer and you could even just get a shot done in the studio after the ceremony.
Don't let tradition and expectations stress you out. This is your day, not anyone else's.

LynnGrace

Agree with others, it's about what you as a couple want, so don't get hung up on 'tradition'.
What you are planning sounds lovely. It would be nice to have some photos of the day, so, I'd be checking lazygal's photographer suggestion out.

Otherwise, a family member/ friend might be able to do it, if one of them is a fairly decent photographer.
Sounds like you don't have an option with the little one, since all family will be present, unless there is a friend who would take him for a few hours, so that you can enjoy the meal, without worrying about him.

Hope you have a great day.

Tordelback

Ruby31, we did almost exactly what you are doing for our wedding (although we each had two friends along too, as witnesses and company for each other), took our 2 year old along to the whole thing, he was in his element with all his various worshippers in one place, spent the day bouncing from one to another, then one set of GPs took him home with them for the night: he brought a great sense of fun to the whole thing, not that he remembers any of it 6 years on. Did our own photos (if you're going down that route bring a tripod and learn to use your timer), stayed in our own home the night before and drove to the registry office together, then dropped the car off and got the bus to the meal still dressed in our finery. It was very intimate and relaxed, and we both thoroughly enjoyed the whole day, even getting to savour the food! Obviously you need to be in the right frame of mind to get the most out of it, but then that probably applies to any wedding.

Note that some family guests reportedly viewed it as 'not a proper wedding' (there's always one), but others regularly remind us how much fun they had in comparison to more formal affairs, and I tend to listen to them!

ameee

Do it whatever way you want. We are getting married soon with only our children and parents and we have a photographer booked. Our wedding will be across the country near the sea and cliffs so we will be staying in the hotel room together the night before. Its your day so dobt worry about tradition just do your own thing. Our one year old will be at the ceremony and meal and that will probably be a disaster but what can you do :-)

We had a small Church Wedding 28 years ago. Just us, Bridesmaid, Best Man, Priest and Photographer. He just did photos at Church. We had an album of 12 photos and same in smaller albums for both Mums. Just the 4 of us had a meal in a posh restaurant.
It's YOUR day, so do what you feels is right for YOU. Good Luck. Be happy.

Ruby31

I'm really glad I posted. Having read all of your replies, I literally feel like a weight's been lifted. If I'm having doubts again, I'll just re-read these posts. I have one friend who had a very small wedding, but she's living abroad, so I didn't get to talk to her at all.

Thanks again!

mrsbyrne

Ruby31 wrote: »

We're having immediate family only to the registry office, followed by a meal in Dublin City.

To anyone who did the same, or is planning the same for their wedding, did you / are you hiring a photographer?

Also, to anyone who married with small children, did you bring the kids to the ceremony & meal? I'm really unsure of what to do. My youngest will be 2.5yrs and there's a chance he could be a disaster at the meal! Problem is that all the family will be with us, so no babysitters available!

Lastly, is it odd to stay in our own house together the night before the wedding?! The logistics of doing the traditional sleeping separately, etc is stressing me out. All my friends went down the traditional, big white wedding day, so I've no-one to ask.

Sounds fab so intimate and special. We were married with a party of 17 some 19 years ago. Married at 11 and on a flight at 3 after a lovely lunch. Great stuff.
Don't worry about the spending the night apart nonsense and don't let anyone persuade you. My OH late mother insisted he spend the night in his old room and I slept in my bridesmaids. We were both lonely and nervous.
Is there absolutely no one to bring your baby to MacDonalds just to let you eat your lunch?

Neyite

The mammy was aghast that I was planning to leave from my own home. But I'll be at least 40 when I get married, together over a decade, and with child(ren) ourselves. It seems stupid for me to leave from a house I haven't lived in for over 22 years!

I reckon he could get a lift with his witness and for me to follow in a car with my helper 15 mins later if needs be. But I've no problem with us going to the venue together.

westernlass

With a smaller group you enjoy your guests company. Photographers do a ceremony only package which works out great usually. They take a few shots after the ceremony too

Ruby31

mrsbyrne wrote: »

Sounds fab so intimate and special. We were married with a party of 17 some 19 years ago. Married at 11 and on a flight at 3 after a lovely lunch. Great stuff.
Don't worry about the spending the night apart nonsense and don't let anyone persuade you. My OH late mother insisted he spend the night in his old room and I slept in my bridesmaids. We were both lonely and nervous.
Is there absolutely no one to bring your baby to MacDonalds just to let you eat your lunch?

Hi MrsByrne,

I have one person who could possibly mind him for the meal, but he hasn't met them yet, so I'd have to do a few text-runs to see how things go! My other problem is that he's refusing to wean from breastfeeding so I haven't been able to leave him for even one night since he was born .

I need to take a tougher stance and get him weaned and into a good sleep routine next couple of months so that I won't be so tied to him.

Appreciate your reply!

Ruby31

westernlass wrote: »

With a smaller group you enjoy your guests company. Photographers do a ceremony only package which works out great usually. They take a few shots after the ceremony too

Thanks Westernlass. I wasn't aware of that. I'll have to ring around and see exactly what's on offer.

Ruby31

Neyite wrote: »

The mammy was aghast that I was planning to leave from my own home. But I'll be at least 40 when I get married, together over a decade, and with child(ren) ourselves. It seems stupid for me to leave from a house I haven't lived in for over 22 years!

I reckon he could get a lift with his witness and for me to follow in a car with my helper 15 mins later if needs be. But I've no problem with us going to the venue together.

I'm thinking of staying in my own house the night before the wedding, heading off to the beauty salon with my witnesses (sisters), mum and daughter and heading with them to the ceremony where I'll meet my OH. I haven't told him that plan yet though!

Fronk was on the radio today and when asked what advice he would give to someone wanting a small wedding, he said "Have it" It's your day and must be what you want!

eviltwin

We spent the night before in our house with a takeaway, just us and our daughter. It was lovely. So relaxed and chilled. We both left the next day together and went to the registry office together. It was lovely to walk in holding his hand and have that last moment of singledom with him rather than with a bunch of girls.