He's just not that into me?

SATSUMA

So, i went on a blind date Sunday evening. The date went well i thought, he said he enjoyed it and there was plenty of banter. I've heard nothing since...

I would imagine if he's interested he would have text by now!? Im getting too old for this!!!

Stavro Mueller

Did you send him a text? He might be wondering the very same thing.

Saipanne

Dating is fickle, unfortunately. You just have to keep at it, and you'll eventually meet someone nice.

My advice is to join social groups, such as drama, choral, hiking, etc. I find it's easier to find something meaningful, in those environments.

Try meetup.com, its full of such groups.

SATSUMA

No i didnt... I didnt want to appear over eager!!!

stargazer 68

SATSUMA wrote: »

No i didnt... I didnt want to appear over eager!!!

Maybe he didnt either!! Text him and then you will know!

Stavro Mueller

Dovies wrote: »

Maybe he didn't either!! Text him and then you will know!

For all any of us know, he has been burnt by women messing him around and he's a bit shot shy too.

One text doesn't mean you're over-eager. What it should do is answer the question you've asked here. If he replies and seems keen to meet you again, happy days. If not, you know where you stand.

Tokyo

SATSUMA wrote: »

No i didnt... I didnt want to appear over eager!!!

A text to say "Hi, just wanted to say thanks for a very nice time this evening", isn't being over eager. It's just showing your gratitude (as you would to anybody), and gives him the opportunity to reply and see if you'd like to do it again sometime.


Look at it from his perspective for a minute. He brought you on a date and hasn't heard a word form you since. How is he supposed to know that you'd like to hear from him again?

Stavro Mueller

Just to add to what Mike said. If you've had bad experience before and you are of the "I don't want to appear over eager" brigade, you might have come across as a bit stand-offish to this guy. If this is the case, he might not be sure if you were into him.

Colonel_McCoy

if you like him text him. Simple.

ash23

A simple "thanks for a lovely evening. Hope to do it again sometime" isn't over eager but it is making it clear you want to see him again. If he doesn't reply to that, then you know he's not interested. Delete and move on.

mickredirl

Life is to short.... Just send him a text!!!

strobe

Yeah text him. "had a great night on Saturday. Would be cool to do it again" or something along those lines. Then you'll know. Any guy that would view that as being too eager probably has some pretty big issues, in which case they're probably not the biggest catch in the world.

Buona Fortuna

strobe wrote: »

Yeah text him. "had a great night on Saturday. Would be cool to do it again" or something along those lines. Then you'll know. Any guy that would view that as being too eager probably has some pretty big issues, in which case they're probably not the biggest catch in the world.

I agree. Back in the day I went on a blind date. I think they are a form of torture and I miss them not one bit.

Anyway, we went to a pub in Chiswick quite pleasant.

Partway through she let out the biggest widest yawn. I said "Are you bored?"

You really can't tell. We've been married 29 years.

Est28

As someone else said.... dating is fickle.

I've had dates where it seemed great, good chat, lots of flirting, banter, laughing and there was never a 2nd... for whatever reason. Maybe there just wasn't enough physical attraction, maybe they were seeing somene else, maybe they weren't really looking for anything more than a date, who knows... but you have to take it on face value, one date, enjoy a nice evening and don't read too much into it.

On the flip side, I've had dates that I didn't know if hey went so well and the person turned out to be enthusiastic to meet again, maybe they were just a bit quieter, or shy or nervous and I got the impression they weren't so interested.

Anyway, the point is... since neither of you really know each other, there's a tendancy to read into small things. Like, if a girl sent me just a "thank you" sort of text, I wouldn't see it at all as being over the top. I'd only think that if she was gushing to me or something. But a nice thanks or just saying you had a fun time would tell me it was worth a shot asking you out again.

Personally, If I hear nothing afterwards, then there's a time I would have followed up if I REALLY liked her but I've learned it's just a bad sign. Especially if a guy ask you out and he maybe buys a few drinks or dinner or whatever it is... if someone can't even send a quick "thanks for that!" sort of text then to me they're sending a message they don't want to speak again and I'd leave it go.