Cooking

Touchee

OK, my main issue is that:
I don't like cooking, for myself or other people
I have no patience for it
I don't know how to cook

My ex used to take it personally and this was one the things that lead to our break up (amongst other fundamental differences)

Are there any other loungers who don't particularly enjoy cooking and how do you go about it?

I know this may be trivial for other people, Mods feel free to delete if not appropriate.

Links234

I love cooking, it's the cleaning up I hate! :pac:

(sorry!)

meeeeh

I used to hate cooking and at first my partner was doing almost all the cooking. It gradually switched and now I do 95 percent of cooking. Considering his working hours we would otherwise eat mostly take aways or preprepared food and I hate both.

Anyway I quite enjoy cooking now and I think I have also talent for following recepies. I still don't have the precision or patience for baking and I find it utterly frustrating.

Penny Tration

If you don't like cooking, it's not a big deal.

You should at least know how to cook healthy meals, though! And tbh, the odd meal for a partner isn't a massive sacrifice.

seenitall

Touchee wrote: »

My ex used to take it personally and this was one the things that lead to our break up (amongst other fundamental differences)

Oh no OP, I feel your pain! I used to be you - back in another life, when I married a chef no less, while hating cooking! I didn't know how to cook and had no interest in it whatsoever. He always cooked at first, then one day understandably, he got very bored with it, and pretty much demanded that I start cooking some of the time... so you can imagine what happened next. Barely anything I made was up to his standards, it was definitely a tough road

Long story short, we split up, but somewhere along the way I did learn how to cook, and also in recent years I've really started enjoying the process more and more, as well as the results!

It is priceless to know how to feed yourself in a properly nutritious way, OP. What kind of diet do you have now? Maybe look around at some cookbooks and see if you can find something that inspires you..? Something not too difficult for starters. I have bought a couple of little cookbooks in the past year and have been cooking like a demon following the recipes. It's really lots of fun, I have been complimented on the food and my daughter is eating healthy, nutritious meals which is SO vital for a little growing body...

Think about it?

Neyite

I've always enjoyed it but its actually the cooking club here that really expanded my recipes and confidence. I pick something interesting to try every pay day and some are gorgeous, easy and tasty.

Touchee

Well, as I said I don't cook at all, because it feels like such waste of time and I take no pride in it either.

My diet would be quite healthy otherwise: salads, smoked salmon, cheese, crackers, eggs, milk, cereals and rarely meat (not a big fan of meat).

I don't like processed/ pre-packed meals, just the above.

However, I doubt that I'll ever find someone that has the same preferences as I do, and everytime I meet someone new and give them fair warning of this, they all seem to believe it is a joke and don't take me seriously. Is it that hard to accept that there are women out there who don't enjoy spending time in the kitchen?

meeeeh

As I said I like cooking and find it relaxing when I don't have two monkeys grabbing my legs while I am opening the oven. But I can understand that pressure to be domestic godess can be a bit annoying. I hate gardening. My grandmother was enthusiastic gardener and she grew enough vegetables to feed an army. Yes the veg were lovely but not lovely enough to get me to work on the allotment (more a field in my grandmother's case). I'm probably depriving my children of essential life skills like how to recognize a worm and they will probably grow up in vegetable hating adults but I just couldn't be bothered. OH every so often designs and plans were we will put our vegetable garden. He was told in no uncertain terms he can maintain it himself. Considering he is still at work atm (he started at eight in the morning) I am not holding out hope.

LenaClaire

When I lived alone I rarely cooked from scratch. Lots of steamed brocolli in noodles, soup and bagged salads. It is so hard to cook for just one and seems like a waste of time. Also, seems like a huge mess to make for 10 minutes of eating along :pac:

I do, however, like cooking for others. I used to love having people over so I could try out new recipes.

Now that I work evenings, my husband takes care of most of the cooking, but I still bake for Christmas and other holidays.

kylith

LenaClaire wrote: »

When I lived alone I rarely cooked from scratch. Lots of steamed brocolli in noodles, soup and bagged salads. It is so hard to cook for just one and seems like a waste of time. Also, seems like a huge mess to make for 10 minutes of eating along :pac:

I know what you mean. Recently I've been making a lot of soups, stews, and casseroles so that I can have one portion for dinner and then freeze the rest. I've saved a ton of money by bringing a frozen portion for lunch as opposed to buying lunches.

pwurple

Gosh I really can't understand that I have to say. I consider cooking to be a very basic part of being an independant grown-up.

Like being able to drive, or read, or dress myself.

I, like your former boyfriend, would have a major issue with living with someone who refused to bother with it.

Neyite

Touchee wrote: »

Well, as I said I don't cook at all, because it feels like such waste of time and I take no pride in it either.

My diet would be quite healthy otherwise: salads, smoked salmon, cheese, crackers, eggs, milk, cereals and rarely meat (not a big fan of meat).

I don't like processed/ pre-packed meals, just the above.

However, I doubt that I'll ever find someone that has the same preferences as I do, and everytime I meet someone new and give them fair warning of this, they all seem to believe it is a joke and don't take me seriously. Is it that hard to accept that there are women out there who don't enjoy spending time in the kitchen?

I don't think its a gendered thing for me. Anyone who suggested it should depend on gender would get an earful from me!

I don't cook for our family because I'm female, I cook because I happen to like it. So I plan our meals and shop for them and cook them, whereas I rarely go near the laundry basket or clothesline because that's what my partner does in lieu of cooking. Its a fairly even split. But he will throw a dinner together for us if I am busy, even a basic one using every utensil in the process, and I'll take out bins/put together shelving if it needs to be done and its just me around.

I don't think I'd be impressed with a partner not pulling their weight in the chores just because they don't like it. I don't like taking out the bins or scrubbing the loo particularly but as a user of these things in my home, I have to pull my weight.

So if you expect to eat dinner made by someone else, or go to eat dinner with friends, its a bit churlish to refuse to return the favour and make dinner for them occasionally, and dress it up as a gender excuse. Like Pwurple, I think its more of a grown-up's skill that should be acquired rather than a gender issue.

pwurple

Touchee wrote: »

My diet would be quite healthy otherwise: salads, smoked salmon, cheese, crackers, eggs, milk, cereals and rarely meat (not a big fan of meat).

Are you eating those eggs raw? Or are you cooking them?

meeeeh

There is a difference between not wanting to cook and not knowing how to boil an egg. I know frying eggs, microwaving beans and making some toast is technically cooing but it's hardly Sunday roast. I doubt op meant she can't boil some water for pasta. Yes cooking is a life skill but let's face it not everyone is good at it or likes doing it. And in two or more person household chores can be divided in a way that makes everyone happy(ish).

Penny Tration

meeeeh wrote: »

There is a difference between not wanting to cook and not knowing how to boil an egg. I know frying eggs, microwaving beans and making some toast is technically cooing but it's hardly Sunday roast. I doubt op meant she can't boil some water for pasta. Yes cooking is a life skill but let's face it not everyone is good at it or likes doing it. And in two or more person household chores can be divided in a way that makes everyone happy(ish).

Absolutely, chores should be divided in a way that makes people happy. My boyfriend hates cooking and I love it. He does my laundry when I'm there, and I cook the dinner.

But, he'll cook something lovely for me on occasion, if I'm wrecked from a hard day in work, or if I'm feeling down. Refusing to cook even a basic meal is really unfair. Nobody is able to commit to cooking for two people every single day. Everyone should at least, as an adult, be able to throw together a relatively healthy meal. I mean, how hard is a bolognese or stir fry?!

pwurple

meeeeh wrote: »

There is a difference between not wanting to cook and not knowing how to boil an egg. I know frying eggs, microwaving beans and making some toast is technically cooing but it's hardly Sunday roast. I doubt op meant she can't boil some water for pasta. Yes cooking is a life skill but let's face it not everyone is good at it or likes doing it. And in two or more person household chores can be divided in a way that makes everyone happy(ish).

The point is, she probably does/can cook, but seems to be on some kick about someone else doing it. The food she eats is cooked, doesn't appear to be on a raw food diet. Somehow it has been cooked, either by her, or someone else. A roast is putting a chicken, spuds and veg in a tray in the oven, walking away for a few hours, coming back later and eating it. Cooking eggs is far more difficult than that.

I also know a few people who point blank refuse to learn to drive. "I shouldn't have to" is their reasoning. So they are bumming lifts, expecting their bf to bus them around constantly like a princess. Honestly, I think it's a bit rich. It's fairly cheeky not to learn how to look after yourself on PRINCIPLE that someone else will do it for you.

Penny Tration

pwurple wrote: »

The point is, she probably does/can cook, but seems to be on some kick about someone else doing it. The food she eats is cooked, doesn't appear to be on a raw food diet. Somehow it has been cooked, either by her, or someone else. A roast is putting a chicken, spuds and veg in a tray in the oven, walking away for a few hours, coming back later and eating it. Cooking eggs is far more difficult than that.

I also know a few people who point blank refuse to learn to drive. "I shouldn't have to" is their reasoning. So they are bumming lifts, expecting their bf to bus them around constantly like a princess. Honestly, I think it's a bit rich. It's fairly cheeky not to learn how to look after yourself on PRINCIPLE that someone else will do it for you.

Completely agree.

With regards to the driving analogy - I don't drive and tbh have no interest in driving. Because it's my personal choice, I don't ask people for lifts. I use public transport. My boyfriend doesn't drive either, but also doesn't ask for lifts.

I'll probably learn to drive soon now that I've gone from a 20 minute commute to 2 hours each way, but even then, my boyfriend already said he wouldn't be asking for lifts anywhere. We'll walk and get buses as usual.

Princess Peach

I love to cook cause it facilitates my other favour hobby of eating delicious food :pac: I'd be very sad to have plain food on a regular basis!

Touchee

Alright so, I didn't get the support I expected

I can boil or fry eggs, I wouldn't consider that cooking, you wouldn't ask friends over and serve them boiled eggs. But that's as far as my cooking goes, no need to prepare smoked salmon and salads...well, they are just salads, some lettuce, tomatoes, cheese and that's it.

I'm not looking to get away from my fair share of house chores, but I'd rather do the washing, cleaning and taking the bins out hopefully I'll find a men willing to compromise

pwurple

I'd ask friends over and give them a smoked salmon salad with boiled eggs, no problem.

Wouldn't mind one now actually!


Seriously though, hope there is more variety to your diet than what you described. And smoked salmon is fairly high in sodium. Carcinogens too if it's farmed rather than wild.

IvyTheTerrible

I used to hate cooking but the more practice I got, the better I got and now I love it.

The OH cooks very occasionally (ie if I have something on in the evening or if I'm sick), but 99% of the time it's me. I don't mind, as he does his fair share of other household tasks which I dislike.

Ice Storm

I'm not a fan of cooking either. The thought of cooking for other people makes me shudder because although I do cook a little, I have very little confidence in my ability.

I currently only cook for myself and I do make an effort from time to time to try new recipes. But I'm a picky eater which rules out a lot and I'm useless with flavours. So I could spend a long time preparing and cooking something, following the recipe exactly but the end result is usually bit bland or whatever and I'm clueless about what I can do to make it taste better. So that puts me off - a lot of work for very little reward.

I have found a few dishes that are tasty and I tend to cook in batches and freeze. The food I like is generally not very healthy though - creamy and cheesy. I would love to have someone to cook for me so I would never have to do it again.

fits

I don't mind cooking for the two of us, but I hate cooking for myself! Its really hard to shop and cook as a single person in Finland. everything comes in family packs! And I hate throwing out food. So I eat canteen food in the middle of the day (its great, good selections of salads and nuts and seeds and balanced meals for a fiver)

At home in Ireland, I do most of the cooking - normally fresh, plain, good food. He does all of the baking. I really don't like baking. I'm not an accurate measurerer

Lia_lia

l love cooking. My Mother is a chef and my Dad is an amazing cook, so it's something I grew up with. The idea of popping a ready meal into a microwave disgusts me

I never understand it when people say they can't cook. If you can read instructions in a recipe or watch a Youtube video, you can cook. It's really not very difficult. And cooking for one is grand. I did it all throughout college, most leftovers can be frozen/eaten the next day for lunch.

I suppose disliking cooking is another thing. Cleaning/washing up is something I hate. I wish we had a dishwasher...

Daisies

Princess Peach wrote: »

I love to cook cause it facilitates my other favour hobby of eating delicious food :pac: I'd be very sad to have plain food on a regular basis!

^ This!

I have rediscovered my love for cooking. I honestly think the kitchen is my favourite room of the house. I am by no means a great cook but I am enthusiastic and enjoy experimenting with new meals. I am a big fan of bulk cooking because I generally cook for myself so this evening I made a big thing of soup, froze 3 portions, cooked up some quinoa and chicken for lunches and have 2 portions of veg curry in the freezer from last week.

Malari

IvyTheTerrible wrote: »

The OH cooks very occasionally (ie if I have something on in the evening or if I'm sick), but 99% of the time it's me. I don't mind, as he does his fair share of other household tasks which I dislike.

Same chez nous! I like it that way. I started learning how to cook pretty early in life and I really enjoy it. Of course it's a chore sometimes and being head kitchen manager means you are usually the one to come up with meal ideas. But then I like being organised and using up odds and ends of fridge contents in a ready-steady-cook stylee. :-)

SMJSF

I hate it, 80% is usually a disaster! And don't ask me to make something "from scratch" my secondary school home economic teachers realised food & I don't go well together!
and don't get me started about forgetting to put butter in my scones batter for my J.C exams!!

Links234

One of the things I want to try cooking is authentic (or as close to authentic) Ramen

ABajaninCork

Living alone, I had to cook! Couldn't afford take-ways, and not a fan of processed/ready-made meals. They all taste of nothing these days...

OP - If you're not a fan of meat, then why not make pasta with a simple tomato sauce? Buy the pasta, can of chopped tomatoes, little olive oil, some garlic and basil if you fancy it and Bingo! You have a meal in minutes.

A favourite meal of mine when single was cooking spaghetti with chopped garlic and chilli fried in a little olive oil. Toss the garlic and chilli through the spaghetti, sprinkle chopped parsley on top and voila!

Now married, I cook for my husband & I. I cook far more meat these days, as my husband doesn't touch fish or vegetarian. He comes home to a cooked meal from scratch, that I've taken pleasure in preparing. But we still have a 'rubbishy' meal -maybe meatballs from the butcher with oven chips and a fry-up Saturday nights!!

ABajaninCork

Links234 wrote: »

I love cooking, it's the cleaning up I hate! :pac:

(sorry!)

So do I. Clean up as you go along. That's what I do. And it makes life a whole lot easier!!

Neyite

ABajaninCork wrote: »

So do I. Clean up as you go along. That's what I do. And it makes life a whole lot easier!!

The clean as you go mantra is one drummed into me from years in catering too. Usually by the time I dish up its only the soaking pots and the serving dishes that need cleaning.

Malari

Neyite wrote: »

The clean as you go mantra is one drummed into me from years in catering too. Usually by the time I dish up its only the soaking pots and the serving dishes that need cleaning.

Me too! Although out of necessity being in a small kitchen too, there's no other way to do it.

Ilyana 2.0

I really enjoy cooking; I wouldn't say I'm great at it but I do make an effort to try new recipes and make things from scratch where I can. Granted, cooking for one can be a pain but I'd never, ever throw out food. If there's enough left for another portion, into the freezer it goes.

My boyfriend, on the other hand, isn't into cooking at all. He can and will cook for himself when he has time, but when we're together I do it. I don't mind; he does the washing up and often buys the food when I'm short on cash (student). At least we're both getting a nice dinner instead of ordering takeaways every time I visit.

meeeeh

I am dreadful with leftovers. Half of the time they are eaten by dog (yes he is fat) or thrown away. The odd ones are used and the rest are frozen and forgotten till the freezer is emptied because there is no space left for new stuff.

Edit: I think (or at least for me) cooking is one of those things you start enjoying when you master some basic skills and get the felling how much seasoning to use or what consistency things are supposed to be. Everyone can follow the instructions but to follow them well you usually need some basic skills.

Malari

meeeeh wrote: »

Edit: I think (or at least for me) cooking is one of those things you start enjoying when you master some basic skills and get the felling how much seasoning to use or what consistency things are supposed to be. Everyone can follow the instructions but to follow them well you usually need some basic skills.

Yeah, this is true. Instructions like "Cook the onions until they start to sweat" or "simmer until the sauce is thick" are basic knowledge, but I know people who don't cook often and they would look for further guidance on this.

I think a mistake newbies make too is being worried about how precisely things are done when cooking. It's really only important when baking!

Mars Bar

Everyone thought I'd be hopeless at cooking and I never cooked in college. Then all of a sudden at home I just started picking a few easy meals and I kind of surprised everyone including myself. I never make roasts or make potato dishes so basically I make the tasty stuff that my mother would never bother making e.g. different pastas, chilli, risotto and curries.

I'm supplying a risotto this evening for my Dad coz Mam is too busy.

Lyaiera

I have never in my life had a risotto. I shall have to correct this and seeing as I can't short to eat out...

LenaClaire

Lyaiera wrote: »

I have never in my life had a risotto. I shall have to correct this and seeing as I can't short to eat out...

Risotto is yum! Not super hard to make, just takes patience

Lyaiera

LenaClaire wrote: »

Risotto is yum! Not super hard to make, just takes patience

I just brought some Japanese noodle dish to the pub. It was lovely, really simple and I feel like curling up for a nap now. If vegy dishes were given to me like this as a child Id be in a much healthier place. I need to learn how to cook dishes like that.

Neyite

Malari wrote: »

Yeah, this is true. Instructions like "Cook the onions until they start to sweat" or "simmer until the sauce is thick" are basic knowledge, but I know people who don't cook often and they would look for further guidance on this.

I think a mistake newbies make too is being worried about how precisely things are done when cooking. It's really only important when baking!

A very good starter cookbook is the Darina Allen ballymaloe cookery course book- I liked that when I was beginning to experiment her book explained how to check for freshness in meat and fish, the names for the different parts and best ways to cook them, what cuts of meat to ask for, and the basics of prepping- like explaining how to shell prawns, fillet fish, etc.

Then she gives good basic knowledge - how to make a base roux and then follows it with the various roux based sauce recipes. Its all cross referenced too.

Lyaiera

I was reading a blog earlier about cooking to a budget. She did a four week exercise where she stuck to the budget she would have if she was on Food Stamps in America. She made a very good point about the cost of experimenting with food, basically that there is a cost to it. You might not like the meal, and be left having to microwave or order something. There's the time cost if you don't like it as you might have spent an hour cooking it (it's a lot slower when you're starting out) and that's a lot of time to have "wasted." And of course there's a financial cost, if you have a limited amount of money it can be very hard to take a chance on something you might not like and that ends up not providing your basic nutrition because it's in the bin.

This is the website, she includes prices next to everything and she recently made a post about what basic supplies you might need for any recipe. I found it really good, with basic, simple to cook recipes on a budget. There's a few I've marked out for making.

http://www.budgetbytes.com/

meeeeh

I think I have Darina Allan's book (is it the thick big book?) and use it a lot, but I don't think it's that great as teaching book. For me by far the best cook book for learning to cook I came across is Marcella Hazan's basics of Italian Cooking (or something simmilar). It has less recipes but very easy to follow. And it has mean pizza base recipe and the one for proper bolognese.

cena

Well you either have takeouts all the time and waste money. It can't be good for you.
Fresh cooked food is the way to go at least you know what goes into it

m'lady

Wouldn't particularly like cooking but nearly starting to enjoy it now as it's appreciated and it gives my oh a break! I'm the type that when I do cook I will do it from scratch, and wouldn't like processed foods at all.

I find our biggest problem is trying to cook a dinner that we can both eat, as I don't eat meat or fish (he does) but I'll eat chicken as does he, but it can't be chicken every night!!

Himself cooks maybe 80% of the time, which is great as previous ex couldn't even make a slice of toast (seriously!), I find a man that can cook very attractive as it shows they can look after themselves and you at times, though I do think that it should be shared if the one that cooks wants a break.

Malari

The standard book in our house growing up was Delia Smith's Complete Cookery Course, which is huge and literally falling apart at the seams but still often used. She has another smaller old one, One is Fun, which is another favourite for dishes for one person (obviously).

They are just referred to as Fat Delia and Thin Delia :-D

In terms of experimenting, it's always an expense getting store cupboard staples at the start, but most spices last for a good time. Also I never considering not liking what I've made so much that I won't eat it! That has never happened!

Neyite

meeeeh wrote: »

I think I have Darina Allan's book (is it the thick big book?) and use it a lot, but I don't think it's that great as teaching book. For me by far the best cook book for learning to cook I came across is Marcella Hazan's basics of Italian Cooking (or something simmilar). It has less recipes but very easy to follow. And it has mean pizza base recipe and the one for proper bolognese.

No, I didnt mean as a teaching book, as a good starter book to begin the basics is where I found it helpful. And as a reference guide if a recipe elsewhere is a bit unclear about a term, or method I looked it up.

But tbh, that was the days before smartphones, so anything I need to look up these days is usually googled.

Princess Peach

I think it would be pretty easy to learn to cook these days, there's a YouTube video for everything! I love Jamie Oliver's Food Tube channel, loads of different cooks showing a great range of recipes.

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

I usually can't be bothered with anything proper if it's just for myself, I'd just have a sandwich or salad or noodles. Breakfast for dinner (usually scrambled egg and toast or porridge) is a regular occurrence, especially in the winter. I'm more of a grazer anyway so I'm not pushed on having a big dinner.

But I can cook, and I like cooking for other people, and I LOVE having stuff cooked for me. I have one basic recipe, called Fcuk Pot, which basically involves grabbing some stuff out of the press and fcuking it into a pot :pac: I'm not great at following recipes like (I can, I just don't usually use them), but put me in any half-decently stocked kitchen and I can throw something nice together.

Neyite wrote: »

The clean as you go mantra is one drummed into me from years in catering too. Usually by the time I dish up its only the soaking pots and the serving dishes that need cleaning.

One thing that has driven me INSANE in house-shares, in boyfriends, and in family members is when there's a policy of "whoever doesn't cook does the dishes", because I worked in catering for years and have the same attitude, so someone cleaning up after me has very little to do and I'll be scraping veg peelings out of the sink and faced with the leaning tower of pots and plates, but apparently it's a fair and equitable division of labour :mad:

Lyaiera

Sara Rapid Sprint wrote: »

One thing that has driven me INSANE in house-shares, in boyfriends, and in family members is when there's a policy of "whoever doesn't cook does the dishes", because I worked in catering for years and have the same attitude, so someone cleaning up after me has very little to do and I'll be scraping veg peelings out of the sink and faced with the leaning tower of pots and plates, but apparently it's a fair and equitable division of labour :mad:

I did that in the last house-share I was in, with friends. It drove me nuts and I eventually called off the deal. The other person who would cook would use every pot and pan, bowls, dishes, several knives and leave a pile of cut-offs and discards everywhere imaginable. I had spent several summers working in kitchens and knew how important it is to clean as you go. I really tried to get him to understand this. He had notions about being a good cook and no matter how many times I told him any good cook will clean as they go he refused.

Earl Turner

I like to cook and it would be a turn off for me if a woman couldn't cook.

sashafierce

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