Standards - livery yard

2012paddy2012

My son has a horse at livery yard for last 4 months. Horse bought there. It's a lovely place with mostly lovely people. Owner is super and very obliging. There is one family who have a bit of a reputation , they appear a bit put out with new arrivals arriving at this yard ... Yesterday out of the blue the woman concerned verbally abused my wife and son , with outrageous language and threats , in full view of young children that were present and upset.my wife stood her ground did not antagonise her , just pointed out that young children were listening to this verbal abuse , she eventually stopped after threatening to "pull my wife's hair out" . My wife was very upset and upset for my 13 yr old son who took dogs abuse from this "lady"
This morning she asked the owner was he going to do anything about it as she is now a bit concerned of reprisals , and she was told " sort it out yourself" nothing I can do. I was rather surprised at this , I had imagined he had a duty of care of some sort to people to whom he provides a service. He further said as I heard nothing I can do nothing. There are adults that were present that we're very taken aback and worried as well , so all he has to do is ask and he will be told what happened.
Bottom line we can leave of course. Probably will despite it being ideal and the majority of people including the owner are extremely nice , why should we have to though? Is there not a responsibility on the proprietor of these yards to ensure that people who pay for livery have the right to tend to their horses without this type of thing happening? Appreciate any advice of others on this matter lease. It's cash in hand each month for full livery , there is no paper work etc ...you pay your fee and away you go ....thks paddy

Landr

Paddy,
I'd leave, the owner may be nice but aggressive behavior of this type is very concerning. The owner be rights should address this as unacceptable, anti social behavior. No yard where I every kept a horse would have allowed this type of assault on a person & with children present. Don't blame you very being concerned.

mike hilux

Hello.

Sorry to hear about your wife and sons experience. I worked in a livery a few years back and at the time a woman moved in her horse. It turned out that she was by polar and would have severe mood swings. Many of the other people requested to be moved away from the surrounding area so as to not to have to deal with it.

The yard owner was a tough women and told the new girl that she was being moved to the stable on the end and if she put a foot out of line then she could bring her horse elsewhere.

I think that the owner really should take more interest in the situation as is seems to have already cost him business. Would the other witnesses not back you up and tell the owner what happened. This sort of behavior should nut be tolerated in a public place where children are present Also if he sais to sort it yourself then do that

Report it to the guards about the verbal abuse and threatening behavior towards a child with names of witnesses and tell all parties involved that this has been done and also if the matter goes further then you will also go further. Then see what happens.

If you don't then it will happen again and if anyone questions your actions just tell them that if your horse stepped out of line then you have to put manners on it and the same applies with the person in your situation.

I hope it works out but just think about how unacceptable that persons behavior was.

Dark Phoenix

The yard owner is not smart to ignore it and just tell you to sort it out because they are at risk of losing money from clients leaving due to this person. They also are at risk of having to handle a difficult situation fiurther down the line in the yard if this womans behaviour escalates.

To be honest i'd say to the woman that if she speaks to you or your family in that manner again you will report it. Stay calm and rational, don't let her rile you. I'd also speak to the yard manager again and explain that while you have made an attempt to 'sort it out yourself' they will be losing you as a client if she steps out of line again and will be at risk of losing other clients too. when the realise that allowing this behaviour has a financial impact they may feel differently about it.

2012paddy2012

Dark Phoenix wrote: »

The yard owner is not smart to ignore it and just tell you to sort it out because they are at risk of losing money from clients leaving due to this person. They also are at risk of having to handle a difficult situation fiurther down the line in the yard if this womans behaviour escalates.

To be honest i'd say to the woman that if she speaks to you or your family in that manner again you will report it. Stay calm and rational, don't let her rile you. I'd also speak to the yard manager again and explain that while you have made an attempt to 'sort it out yourself' they will be losing you as a client if she steps out of line again and will be at risk of losing other clients too. when the realise that allowing this behaviour has a financial impact they may feel differently about it.

the owner apologised sincerely to wife and child today. he said he has given the offender "marked their cards"as he says. He told wife is was unacceptable and shouldn't have happened. He said he hoped we would stay and not let them run us out. other people said he was heard roaring back at offender and warning her and husband that it was unacceptable and seems to have laid down the law. I still think best to walk away ..it will be expensive move!!! missus happy enough to see how it goes. matter was noted by gaurds ...should a further incident occur its on record...think probably play it by ear for now......co incidentally , the offenders horse received serious injury around same time ..this occurred , I think owner is trying to keep on their right side to keep the peace and avoid any litigation as regard horse injury...well that's the rumour!! thks for advice.

bnagrrl

Move yards would be my advice. In my old yard I, and other liveries, regularly received abuse from a woman there for various perceived sleights. The yard owner acknowledged that this woman was difficult. One day she could be perfectly nice to you, the next she'd be charging around the stable block swinging a head collar and rope, screaming that someone had turned their horse out in the turn out paddock and she wanted it. :rolleyes:

In the end I left, went to a much quieter yard with only a handful of liveries. I pay a bit more and it's about ten mins more drive but when I get there I am almost guaranteed it have a peaceful yard to myself and can work in the arena or fields without worrying about some nutcase screaming at me. It's an expensive hobby, and one to be enjoyed, not for your son to be worried or upset about going to the yard.

lyoness

I'd be more worried how this horse sustained an injury and why you think there may be litigation?

Ah_Yeah

I'd also question the YOs professionalism as no YO should roar at customers in front of other customers, regardless of the situation.

Kamili

I've been in a similar situation recently. And had to leave the yard I've been in for over three years. Best advice is to leave, but don't do it in a hurry. It's difficult enough to find a livery yard that's suits, so take your time and check them out. But keep your cards close to your chest and don't tell people in your current yard you are looking around.
Take your time and don't get involved with talking about the incident with other liveries, rumours will spread and it will upset and antagonise others as well as yourself.
What is it with livery yards and schoolyard bullying? Seems to be very common in some of them!

I've now moved to another yard which is much quieter, has much better facilities and care of my horses is much much superior. I couldn't be happier! Plus there is none of this carry on happening.

Riverireland

I'd take the advice above and move yards unless you have no option but to stay. This sort of behaviour is not an everyday thing in yards but it's not unusual either unfortunately. Expect to have to change yards from time to time in my experience.

What was said to your wife, was it horse related or something to do with the child?

2012paddy2012

Riverireland wrote: »

I'd take the advice above and move yards unless you have no option but to stay. This sort of behaviour is not an everyday thing in yards but it's not unusual either unfortunately. Expect to have to change yards from time to time in my experience.

What was said to your wife, was it horse related or something to do with the child?

Matter reported to garda
Owner spoke to witnesses.
Offending party has been spoken to.
She is on her last chance. She verbally abused him too
She has shown her true colours to all.
All is ok now. Fab yard. Owner apology to wife and his request to her that she stays has been accepted. Staying put for now.
Appreciate all fab advice.

Kamili

Great to hear its all worked out! Hope you and your family can get back to enjoying the pony now

2012paddy2012

Kamili wrote: »

Great to hear its all worked out! Hope you and your family can get back to enjoying the pony now

Ya I am delighted really. The owner gives missus one of his horses as her own! She rides horse all the time - he is fierce decent ..even though we pay for young lads horse only ! The aggressor was very unhapoy as she wanted to ride it! As a result of her outburst owner has told her the horse is for missus exclusively ! She is put out - her problem lol

Kamili

2012paddy2012 wrote: »

Ya I am delighted really. The owner gives missus one of his horses as her own! She rides horse all the time - he is fierce decent ..even though we pay for young lads horse only ! The aggressor was very unhapoy as she wanted to ride it! As a result of her outburst owner has told her the horse is for missus exclusively ! She is put out - her problem lol

That sounds great. Karma has a way