Would you swap your life with any of the following?

Macavity.

You have the option to switch places with any of the following:

1- You are a Great White Shark in the prime of life, you do whatever Great White Sharks generally do.

2- You are a homeless person on the streets of New York, however, you are an incredibly talented singer and guitarist. You could become one of the greatest performers of all time, or it is possible your talent will never ever be discovered.

3- You have 100 million in cash but can never experience love, have sex, or even masturbate. Note: You will not be horny ever, you do not experience sexual arousal.

4- You swap lives with Pete Doherty.

5- You keep your life, except it is now narrated by Kevin Spacey. He makes a lot of sarcastic remarks throughout your day.

Or do you choose to keep your life the way it is?

Lenin Skynard

Yeah I'd swap my wife for any of those things.

Karl Stein

6. Cake

Macavity.

100 Million/No sex

I'd go with the homeless singer option, but the Kevin Spacey narration is tempting!

Hotfail.com

Pete Doherty

Is no. 3 any kind of love or the "I'd ride the hole off ya" kind of love?

Lenin Skynard

Hotfail.com wrote: »

Is no. 3 any kind of love or the "I'd ride the hole off ya" kind of love?

It is if you want it to be, baby.

djflawless

Pete Doherty

Defo no 3
No urges no frustration
What to do with all the money?
Jet propelled monster truck

Macavity.

100 Million/No sex

djflawless wrote: »

Defo no 3
No urges no frustration
What to do with all the money?
Jet propelled monster truck

I'd hire Kevin Spacey to follow me around and make comments about my every day life.

toastedpickles

Yeah number three, I don't feel any of that anymore anyways :pac:

Sir Arthur Daley

Ill take no.7:
Open another beer, cant make sense of the current 6.

takamichinoku

Macavity. wrote: »

4- You swap lives with Pete Doherty.

why?!

Hotfail.com

Pete Doherty

takamichinoku wrote: »

why?!

Heroin.

duchalla

Pure 3 in the morning thread...

Macavity.

100 Million/No sex

Hotfail.com wrote: »

Is no. 3 any kind of love or the "I'd ride the hole off ya" kind of love?

Any kind of love. You love chocolate? Not anymore, now you just really like it.

djflawless

Pete Doherty

Macavity. wrote: »

Any kind of love. You love chocolate? Not anymore, now you just really like it.

So its not just the bond between a man and woman but also the bond between a man and his beer, or a welsh man and sheep??

Macavity.

100 Million/No sex

Nobody wants to be a shark or Pete Doherty.

Sir Arthur Daley

No. 3 needs revision. if one never experiences sexual arousal one does not need to masturbate or have sex or other.

Angry_Mammarys

I'd keep my life the way it is thank you very much:pac:


Why would anyone want to be a shark?!!? Sharks are crap.

Macavity.

100 Million/No sex

djflawless wrote: »

So its not just the bond between a man and woman but also the bond between a man and his beer, or a welsh man and sheep??

Yes, unfortunately.

I'm surprised at the amount of people willing to give up sex, although it's a lot of money I suppose.

Hotfail.com

Pete Doherty

Macavity. wrote: »

Nobody wants to be a shark or Pete Doherty.

That is probably the strangest sentence I'll ever see.

Fr_Dougal

Ted, if you had three wishes, what would they be? Three wishes? I don't know, really.
I suppose the first one'd be world peace, and then maybe an end to hunger and, er (Disco music) .
.
more money for hospitals and that type of thing.
Fair enough, Ted.
And what would your three wishes be? Oh, no, I'm happy enough, really.
- You wouldn't want anything? - No, I don't think so.
I can't think of anything, anyway.
You wouldn't, say, want a big car to drive around in? Oh-ho, wow! That'd be fantastic! Driving around in a big car - that'd be brilliant!
What would be your second wish? Oh, that'd be fine.
The car'd be fine.
You wouldn't like to be a rock star or something, like Elvis? Oh-ho, God, yeah! I'd love to be a rock star like Elvis or something! That'd be brilliant! So, uh, your third wish, if you had one? Oh, no, that'd be fine.
If I had a big car and I was Elvis that'd be grand.
You wouldn't like, say, um this cup? Oh, God, yeah! I'd love that cup! If I had that cup and I was Elvis in a big car, that'd be fantastic! You've never had much imagination, have you? You're right there, Ted.

djflawless

Pete Doherty

Macavity. wrote: »

Yes, unfortunately.

I'm surprised at the amount of people willing to give up sex, although it's a lot of money I suppose.

Sex can bring partial happyness.that much cash would have me smiling in my grave as my corpse decomposed

Macavity.

100 Million/No sex

djflawless wrote: »

Sex can bring partial happyness.that much cash would have me smiling in my grave as my corpse decomposed

I had pondered having it as 10 million. I wonder would that have made much of a difference.

djflawless

Pete Doherty

Nope

SureYWouldntYa

Pete Doherty

Number 3 is how my life is now mostly, minus about 99.999999 million

Glock Lesnar

Nah bro, I'm sweet

100 million and no sex would be fine with me. Right now I have no million and no sex.

Homeless Singer

As tempting as Kevin Spacey and 100 million with no sex were, I went with being a shark because this whole human thing is way too difficult.

<(((">

Plus I'd be able to swim and eat humans, both of which I currently am unable to do.

_ _ _ _ /\_ _ _ _\o/_ _ _

Buona Fortuna

Angry_Mammarys wrote: »

I'd keep my life the way it is thank you very much:pac:


Why would anyone want to be a shark?!!? Sharks are crap.

Yeah. Should have made it a Dolphin. Dolphins have fun and their fair share of sex (with other dolphins). If it was a Dolphin I'd have been tempted but not a shark might as well say bowl of soup or a chicken.

Stay the same. Unless I could be a transformer?

Angry_Mammarys

Buona Fortuna wrote: »

Yeah. Should have made it a Dolphin. Dolphins have fun and their fair share of sex (with other dolphins). If it was a Dolphin I'd have been tempted but not a shark might as well say bowl of soup or a chicken.

Stay the same. Unless I could be a transformer?

Dolphins are sinister creatures as well though!!! have you not seen that episode of King of the hill ?!:eek:

Buona Fortuna

Angry_Mammarys wrote: »

Dolphins are sinister creatures as well though!!! have you not seen that episode of King of the hill ?!:eek:

No but I remember Flipper and I've seen Fungi.

Sharks are evil, sooner be a lobster.

Angry_Mammarys

Buona Fortuna wrote: »

No but I remember Flipper and I've seen Fungi.

Sharks are evil, sooner be a lobster.

same, lobsters live for a looong looong time, much longer than us humans :cool:

Buona Fortuna

Angry_Mammarys wrote: »

same, lobsters live for a looong looong time, much longer than us humans :cool:

Life as a Lobster could be totally pleasant. You go along the bottom of the sea eating bits and pieces. Nothing bothers you.

One day you're caught and it all ends with a nice warm bath and some bastard pouring garlic butter all over you.

smcgiff

djflawless wrote: »

Sex can bring partial happyness.that much cash would have me smiling in my grave as my corpse decomposed

Freud argues (or rather argued) differently.

Richard Hillman

Pete Doherty

I'll take the cash Jeff.

djflawless

Pete Doherty

smcgiff wrote: »

Freud argues (or rather argued) differently.

Come up with the money and I'll participate in a new study

DEFTLEFTHAND

Homeless Singer

I want to be an Orca instead of the GW shark. Can we do that?

SeaFields

Can Morgan Freeman narrate my life? That'd be cool :cool:

Macavity.

100 Million/No sex

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

I want to be an Orca instead of the GW shark. Can we do that?

How dare you make a mockery of this thread. Leave this forum and never come back!

whirlpool

Jaysus... who voted for 100 million and no sex? Sex is the whole point of life!
(Was tempted to spell "whole" differently. AH has clearly ruined me.)

But yeah... without sex life would not be worth living.

(Apologies to anyone who has had the ability to have sex taken away from them. )

whirlpool

Glock Lesnar wrote: »

Nah bro, I'm sweet

...and an 18 year old American "dude" too, I hope.

smcgiff

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

I want to be an Orca instead of the GW shark. Can we do that?

An Orca? No, that would just be silly.