Funny moments at funeral's!

freshpopcorn

A couple of years ago when my grandmother was alive. She went to a 'friends' funeral, in the graveyard she was paying respects to the family. She asked one woman ''How your mother?'' The woman replied ''She's just being buried there''.
Do you have any funny funeral moments?

tomwaterford

freshpopcorn wrote: »

A couple of years ago when my grandmother was alive. She went to a 'friends' funeral, in the graveyard she was paying respects to the family. She asked one woman ''How your her mother?'' The woman replied ''She's just being buries there''.
Do you have any funny funeral moments?

once saw someone falling into the grave after lowering in the coffin....felt bad for them...while trying not to laugh

wazky

"What did he die of?"

"Of a Tuesday"

The Master

freshpopcorn wrote: »

She asked one woman ''How your her mother?'' The woman replied ''She's just being buries there''.

when are you when heat legend dies

was sat at home drinking brain fluid when fred ring

'heat is die'

'Noooooooooo'

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

Went to a funeral with two work colleagues. It was the husband of an employee I hardly knew, and my boss had asked us to attend on behalf of the company.

Traveling from the church to the graveyard was by car, we were first out of the church and decided to pull in at the main road and wait for the funeral convoy. Comes along and we join up.

Everyone pulls in at the graveyard and we get out. Walk up to pay our respects and notice it's not the same crowd. We'd followed the wrong coffin and ended up at a different cemetery 5 miles away.

knucklehead6

The Master wrote: »

when are you when heat legend dies

was sat at home drinking brain fluid when fred ring

'heat is die'

'Noooooooooo'

BRAAAAAAAIIINS

wretcheddomain

Went to a funeral once and the corpse got out of the coffin, started dancing erratically, then went back into the coffin and the ceremony resumed as normal.

Your everyday happening in Carlow.

knucklehead6

wretcheddomain wrote: »

Went to a funeral once and the corpse got out of the coffin, started dancing erratically, then went back into the coffin and the ceremony resumed as normal.

Your everyday happening in Carlow.

Three yr old girl from the Philippines, living in Carlow?

wretcheddomain

knucklehead6 wrote: »

Three yr old girl from the Philippines, living in Carlow?

There's a lot lower than that I can assure you.

Moreover, why is she in your avatar, you dirty old pervert.

dxhound2005

I was at a funeral in Donegal and the cemetery was on a fairly steep hill. The grave was near the top and the crowd standing round had a lovely view over the Donegal countryside. Heard one man say to another, this would be a great spot for a house, sir.

imurdaddy

tomwaterford wrote: »

once saw someone falling into the grave after lowering in the coffin....felt bad for them...while trying not to laugh

Years ago I was at a family funeral, came to the burial and my brother was pushing forward to see what was going on he got to the front of the crowd at the graveside but the ground crumbled away under his feet and down he went in on top of the coffin! I can still see his face lookin up from the grave! Funny as hell!! Lol

whirlpool

wretcheddomain wrote: »

Went to a funeral once and the corpse got out of the coffin, started dancing erratically, then went back into the coffin and the ceremony resumed as normal.

That was a Madonna concert. :rolleyes:

whirlpool

Towards the end of my grandad's funeral, the church's fire alarm started going off. Things got awkward. Nobody budged though, some of us started to giggle uncontrollably (me included.) After a few minutes the alarm stopped. Within thirty seconds a car alarm started going off in the car park. That took us through to the end of the mass.

Ah ye had to be there! :pac:

Pumpkinseeds

We went to the funeral home for the removal of a neighbour. I didn't know the relatives and the funeral home has a long bench that runs in a long L shape. We weren't really sure what we were supposed to be doing and I almost sat down in the middle of the family:o Thankfully I realised, but only just as my butt was about an inch from seat. That would have been mortifying:o:o

CarrickMcJoe

About a year ago my neighbours arrive home one evening all dressed up. Now, he is never tidy, so I commented to his wife how she managed to get him cleaned up.
She replies," Ah, hes away to bed".
Me, "Oh I know the feeling, we all have days like that", thinking they were at a do of some sort.
About an hour later Mrs McJoe walks in and says, "See John's mothers dead".

Only then did I realize what his wife was telling me, (his mother's dead). Had to go and apologize/sympathize.

whupdedo

Was at a funeral their lately, everyone was crying like little girls, twas gas altogether

Flippyfloppy

Years ago at a dear friends parents' funeral mass, myself and best friend were sitting beside eachother. At one point in the mass everyone kneels down while she proudly stands up (and doesn't realise she's the only one) One of those moments, where you just cannot stop laughing and keep setting eachother off, because you know it's so wrong, so inappropriate and looks so bad.

RoadhouseBlues

Years ago at my fathers funeral. You can imagine its a horrible time and your head is all over the place. Near the end when people were coming up shaking hands, this old man came over. To this day I don't know who he was, and I've asked the family and they don't know either. But he had the biggest nose I have ever seen in my life. When he leaned forward to shake hands, I had to lean back in case it hit me. I didn't laugh, but I know if I had to look around at the rest of them I would have been in convulsions. Can you imagine that.

Someone I know was at another funeral, and the person in front of them shook hands with one of the family. Instead of saying, "Sorry for your troubles*, they said "Congratulations"

thelad95

Was at my grand-uncle's removal a couple of months ago and me and my mother went in to shake hands and offer our condolences etc. There was this old lady ahead of us doing the rounds, no idea who she was. Anyway she's shaking hands with my grandfather when she does a massive sneeze and gets snot all over his hand. Most people were just looking around awkwardly but I had to leave the room in absolute stitches!

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

At a funeral of a local woman with my sister, church was jammed, it was during the summer so it was roasting and really stuffy, with that weird Jesus incense stuff making things worse.

Right in the middle I feel what I think is my sister getting a fit of the giggles and putting her face into my shoulder to try and hide it, I give her a dig to get her to cop on to herself...she sits up straight and then just goes toppling in the other direction onto the man on the other side of her. Turns out she'd fainted from the heat and stuffiness, had to be carried out of the place by two lads thank god we were fairly near the back and didn't disrupt things too much.

ms1968

At my grandmother's funeral some years ago, the coffin had been lowered into the ground, and the final prayers were being said. My mother was obviously very upset at this point. We were all around her, holding her, comforting her. And then a frog fell into the hole and was sitting on the coffin, looking up at everyone. Lightened the moment somewhat. Don't know what became of it.

Semele

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=89610288&postcount=212

I'd posted this already in the cringeworthy moments thread and, since it's been my most thanked post ever, I think it deserves another outing!

Sulla Felix

My fathers funeral, group of his oldest best friends assigned to do the carry (my brothers and cousins did it from church to hearse). So, whatever way they manage it we all hear the funeral director furiously whispering "no, no, you've got it backwards, get it turned around!" to which the wisecrack Ken replies "No, we've got it right, we're heading back to the pub!" that we'd passed on the way.
Few hundred people roaring laughing. Dad would have loved it. :pac:

on_my_oe

My grandmother died at 89 years young, and her funeral was held at a funeral home, rather than a church. We came out after the service, milling around, exchanging solemn condolences with low volume music in the background. Suddenly all the grandchildren are laughing with all parents looking on puzzled - Coolios Gangstas Paradise was being played by the funeral home. Visions of Grandma being the secret matriarch crime boss...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cpGbzYlnz7c

emer_b

It was a funeral of an elderly lady who had a very small family and wasn't very well liked (even by her family) so the mood wasn't too somber to start with.

There's a playground about a mile from the graveyard where there was some kind of sports day going on. It was a clear crisp winters day so the sound system at the playground was crystal clear, we could all hear the mc lining up the races, calling the kids names etc.

Then, just as they were lowering the coffin some kid can be heard on the microphone blasting out "Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the waaaaay...".
Well, even the priests shoulders were shaking with laughter

RoadhouseBlues

Semele wrote: »

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=89610288&postcount=212

I'd posted this already in the cringeworthy moments thread and, since it's been my most thanked post ever, I think it deserves another outing!

That is a good one:-)

NSAman

My dad died recently, I was actually abroad when he went into hospital so had to dash home travel almost 18 hours flying and I managed to say my goodbyes before he drifted into sleep. While I was in a daze as was the rest of the family, it was the first time in years we actually started thinking about all the crazy business ideas the man had and what he had put us through to get through life. A great Dad he was and always will be to us...

However, during the wake which was held at home, the house was packed for three days. On the afternoon before the mas and burial, my siblings and I all went upstairs to my room, which was above where we had laid out dad downstairs to write the Eulogy. People were still streaming into the house it was literally heaving. Unknown to us upstairs, the priest had arrived. We started putting things down on paper and were all literally falling around the room laughing and crying at the same time, we were having a great time remembering our dad, it really brought us together for the first time in ages, it was like we were kids again.

Finally we went downstairs, house packed and silent all looking at us... mother throwing daggers.

We didn't realise they were saying prayers underneath us and the noise from upstairs was deafening..;)

Maphisto

At a funeral a couple of years ago a hard of hearing relative misheard a conversation in the cemetary.

Two elderly ladies were discussing the cost of a double grave and how expensive it was these days.

My hard of hearing relative thought they said Dublin, so he asked "Is that return?"

They both said gravely "There's no return now".

ballsymchugh

this thread brings home how the irish people are so much better at dealing with death than where i am in the UK. over here it's a stiff upper lip thing, you wait a couple of weeks for your slot at the crematorium and then it's done in a few minutes. all very sterile.

anyway, at a funeral of a relatively young neighbour a few years ago, an older neighbour was sympathising with the family saying how shocking it was. the poor lad died from electrocution!

lulu1

A good few years ago at a funeral of a neighbour I had to take one of the children with me to the mass It was a few days before christmas. We were all sitting in the church waiting for the remains to be carried in. A man with grey hair and a long grey beard came walking up the aisle. At the top of his voice my son called out "Look mammy there's Santa Clause. Everyone around us was in fits of laughing including the man hinself.

Cantremember

Aye, aye, will we turn it on now? Aye.

DazMarz

Witnessed the priest falling into the grave at a funeral. Not once, but twice. At the same funeral. Needless to say, I had to pretend I was suddenly stricken with grief... it's amazing how giggling and laughing can be turned into "crying"...

Sir Arthur Daley

Was at the rosary of a close relative in another town, the prayers were said the public left and it was just the families who were talking catching up. In walks the undertaker and out loud shouts have ye any home to go to?
One of my cousins shouted back been thrown out of plenty pubs and nightclubs but never thrown out of a funeral home before.

harry Bailey esq

Sulla Felix wrote: »

My fathers funeral, group of his oldest best friends assigned to do the carry (my brothers and cousins did it from church to hearse). So, whatever way they manage it we all hear the funeral director furiously whispering "no, no, you've got it backwards, get it turned around!" to which the wisecrack Ken replies "No, we've got it right, we're heading back to the pub!" that we'd passed on the way.
Few hundred people roaring laughing. Dad would have loved it. :pac:

That's actually quite nice,a bit of humour,correctly delivered, softens the blow. When my da died his youngest brother,the black sheep of the family and a notorious boozehound insisted on doing a reading.My da was fond of a game of poker.Anyways he starts off talking about the fun he and me da used to have on there monthly poker nights,very coherent and well thought out.15 minutes later he was still up on the altar,preaching to the flock about how to con online bookmakers,eventually the priest had to cut him off,although it was cringeworthy to watch at the time,11years later we all still remember his 'eulogy' and have a good giggle.and like yourself id say pops was looking down(or up) on us pissin himself laughing

ohohseven

A couple of years ago my grandfather died so my family had the " brilliant" idea of having my newborn cousins christening on the same day as my grandfather's funeral. It was the same priest , same mass. However the quite elderly priest muddled up the sacraments and effectively buried my cousin and christened my grandfather.

Sir Arthur Daley

ohohseven wrote: »

A couple of years ago my grandfather died so my family had the " brilliant" idea of having my newborn cousins christening on the same day as my grandfather's funeral. It was the same priest , same mass. However the quite elderly priest muddled up the sacraments and effectively buried my cousin and christened my grandfather.

One mass where a funeral and baptism happened it did of course :rolleyes:

harry Bailey esq

ballsymchugh wrote: »

this thread brings home how the irish people are so much better at dealing with death than where i am in the UK. over here it's a stiff upper lip thing, you wait a couple of weeks for your slot at the crematorium and then it's done in a few minutes. all very sterile.

anyway, at a funeral of a relatively young neighbour a few years ago, an older neighbour was sympathising with the family saying how shocking it was. the poor lad died from electrocution!

brilliant!

ohohseven

Sir Arthur Daley wrote: »

One mass where a funeral and baptism happened it did of course :rolleyes:

No I made it up so everyone would want to be my friend and by me pretty things. It's a thread about funny funeral stories so I had my input, so kindly bugger off

Sir Arthur Daley

ohohseven wrote: »

No I made it up so everyone would want to be my friend and by me pretty things. It's a thread about funny funeral stories so I had my input, so kindly bugger off

Join facebook if you want to make friends, you will get a better result in accumulating friends and your facebook friends believing it. :pac:

ohohseven

Sir Arthur Daley wrote: »

Join facebook if you want to make friends, you will get a better result in accumulating friends and your facebook friends believing it. :pac:

I am on facebook and I don't care if you believe it or not. Now if you don't mind Vicarius filii dei go bother someone else.

Sir Arthur Daley

ohohseven wrote: »

I am on facebook and I don't care if you believe it or not. Now if you don't mind Vicarius filii dei go bother someone else.

Ok, can we be facebook friends at least?

ardle1

freshpopcorn wrote: »

A couple of years ago when my grandmother was alive. She went to a 'friends' funeral, in the graveyard she was paying respects to the family. She asked one woman ''How your mother?'' The woman replied ''She's just being buried there''.
Do you have any funny funeral moments?

The Master wrote: »

when are you when heat legend dies

was sat at home drinking brain fluid when fred ring

'heat is die'

'Noooooooooo'

What is appenin innit:cool:

ardle1

RoadhouseBlues wrote: »

Years ago at my fathers funeral. You can imagine its a horrible time and your head is all over the place. Near the end when people were coming up shaking hands, this old man came over. To this day I don't know who he was, and I've asked the family and they don't know either. But he had the biggest nose I have ever seen in my life. When he leaned forward to shake hands, I had to lean back in case it hit me. I didn't laugh, but I know if I had to look around at the rest of them I would have been in convulsions. Can you imagine that.

Someone I know was at another funeral, and the person in front of them shook hands with one of the family. Instead of saying, "Sorry for your troubles*, they said "Congratulations"

I was kinda laughing at your post, but when I read the last bit I bursted

Poxyshamrock

I know of one funeral where the priest was blessing the coffin by sprinkling the water on it with that water sprinkling tool and bowl thing when the stick flew out of his hand and got one of the relatives in the face.

Also, this happened at Joe Duffy's relative's funeral last year!

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2405341/Prepare-doors-landing-Funeral-interrupted-air-stewardess-message-radio-signals-passing-plane-picked-churchs-speakers.html

ohohseven

Sir Arthur Daley wrote: »

Ok, can we be facebook friends at least?

Could atleast buy me dinner first.

Kerplunk124

These stories are brilliant, keep them up.

TGJD

At my grandmother's funeral a couple of years ago my extended family and I were standing in the funeral parlour shaking hands with sympathisers as you do. It had been a long night and toward the end one of my cousins had become confused in the monotonous routine and instead of the usual thank you for coming response to the usual sorry for your loss, he was greeting people with " I'm sorry"
My brother and I were standing near him trying not to laugh. It brightened up a sad day a bit anyway.

mickydoomsux

I was at a funeral once and someone farted on the corpses balls.

Oh, how we all laffed and laffed.

ToddyDoody

At a great aunt's funeral while prayers were being said at the graveside, some fcuker from a nearby group let it rip during two consecutive moments of silence... "we now take a moment to remember in our own way our dear departed sister".........*squeak*....*squeak*....*BOOM*.....*sniiggering*...."and we ask the lord that he may..."

blinding

TGJD wrote: »

At my grandmother's funeral a couple of years ago my extended family and I were standing in the funeral parlour shaking hands with sympathisers as you do. It had been a long night and toward the end one of my cousins had become confused in the monotonous routine and instead of the usual thank you for coming response to the usual sorry for your loss, he was greeting people with " I'm sorry"
My brother and I were standing near him trying not to laugh. It brightened up a sad day a bit anyway.

Same happened to me. Ending up saying "Sorry For your Troubles" to the sympathisers. I'd say it happens a lot because of the situation.

recyclops

at my mothers funeral we needed to go round the church twice as the funeral director didnt want us getting out of the car laughing due a joke my bro told just as we were driving in the church gates

the flowers on the altar gradually went on fire and nobody decided to speak up until they start smoking and set off the fire alarms, then when tossing muck onto the grave as is tradition a lose rock was in my bros and it sounded like a knock on the coffin twice, shocked a fair few people.

all in all the fact all this happened has given me a much better memory of my mums funeral