Motoring Questions - Please. Help. Please.

BreadnBuddha

I have had enough. I just bought a new car and didn't get the logbook yet. I could ask the authority responsible for dealing with this how long it takes, but maybe instead of doing something sensible I'll ask it here for the 6924th time. Please, won't somebody help me? On the way back from court because I wasn't texting my friend but a Garda said I was, I was speeding, and I know it, but the GUards are horrible so there. I hope they send it to the wrong address so everyone here can say I should get away with it. I don't know what will happen though. Ngggggg...blah blah blah. Are there any fortune tellers here?

So, after stopping to fill up my diesel car with petrol, I took the next bend and a cyclist cut me off, then a biker thumped my car and a pedestrian ran out in front of me. I then drove into a pothole so now I have to get someone to recommend somewhere to buy part worn tyres that would suit a formula one car but on the price that's more suitable to wheelbarrow ownership. Luckily, I had some duct tape. And Plasti-dip. It's perfect now, so I'm thinking about selling it. How much do you think it's worth? Oh, the diesel. What should I do? A mechanic is so expensive, and they're all ripoff scumbags, aren't they? Yeah. Start the witch hunt. Eh, like I was saying, it's perfect. Should I tell the guy who's coming from Nigeria with a bank draft about the non-problem?

I got insured with INXS insurance but they're gone now, but I still have the disk in the window. The POlice asked me to bring it to the jail and produce my license. I was on my own but don't have a license but I did the theory test so will I be okay? What should I do? And, if a bear crashes a Mk II escort into a tree in Donegal, does anybody hear the sound? Eh, no...Eh, it wasn't me. It was my bear friend. What should I do? Oh, right. Yeah, good idea. I'll buy an avensis. Because they're awesome. I mean, for my friend. Yeah.

What about the tax though? Because I have one already. I forgot about it. It's a 6.7L twin turbo super-de-dooper one. With recaros. And it's mint. I got it when I was 12. Should I just use the oil I have in the garage, beside the lawnmower for it? I'm willing to take advice from any stranger on the internet who is able to pretend they know anything. You are my motoring gods.

I was thinking of changing it for a jeep. You know, so I can tow 6 horses. I was looking at a Suzyjuky and a Landcrusher. What's the best one? I have a budget of between 2 packets of tayto and up to around 5 cases of Dutch Gold. I can save my pocket money though. I was going to sell my BMX too, so take the time to give me serious advice. I promise to daydream after I've finished my homework.

BTW.. I need to respray my Wishy Washy Scooobaroo after I finish fitting the Bell Heli Turbine I got from a mate. How long is a piece of string?

On a serious note, are those sparkplugs you buy on the internet any good?

For Forks Sake

It's a bit early in the day to be that drunk

BMJD

foglights are only for fog, moroon

MuppetCheck

BMJD wrote: »

foglights are only for fog, moroon

I hate to do this but that's not how you spell moron.

corktina

MuppetCheck wrote: »

I hate to do this but that's not how you spell moron.

did you leave out a comma there ?

Stheno

Jesus, I came on here for a break from a college assignment!

R.O.R

corktina wrote: »

did you leave out a comma there ?

I was just about to comment on his poor punctuation. ! ? ! ?

Valetta

corktina wrote: »

did you leave out a comma there ?

At least they started the post with a capital letter.

MuppetCheck

corktina wrote: »

did you leave out a comma there ?

Stheno

I wonder how long it took the OP to compose that rant?

Anyway, back to academia.

dgt

At least OP you weren't clamped

BreadnBuddha

Are you saying I should use the snowfoam before the clay bar, or just fit the turbo timer now? Because my uncles dogs vet said if I weld the diff she won't go Boooooo!

saucyleopard

That's it exactly. you really are a straight to the point person.

Gazzmonkey

That wall of text was difficult to read OP.

BreadnBuddha

Gazzmonkey wrote: »

That wall of text was difficult to read OP.

You should try reading some of the stuff posted in Motors if you think that was difficult to read.

Gazzmonkey

BreadnBuddha wrote: »

You should try reading some of the stuff posted in Motors if you think that was difficult to read.

By the way, no offence was directed at you.

It's true I find a lot of posts difficult to read, but been severely dyslexic might have something to do with that. lol

corktina

It was posted in Motors wasn't it?

BreadnBuddha

corktina wrote: »

It was posted in Motors wasn't it?

You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel.

BMJD

MuppetCheck wrote: »

I hate to do this but that's not how you spell moron.

Morooon*

Marlow

Just make sure, that you don't hit that badger.

/M

Dia1988

BreadnBuddha wrote: »

I have had enough. I just bought a new car and didn't get the logbook yet. I could ask the authority responsible for dealing with this how long it takes, but maybe instead of doing something sensible I'll ask it here for the 6924th time. Please, won't somebody help me? On the way back from court because I wasn't texting my friend but a Garda said I was, I was speeding, and I know it, but the GUards are horrible so there. I hope they send it to the wrong address so everyone here can say I should get away with it. I don't know what will happen though. Ngggggg...blah blah blah. Are there any fortune tellers here?

So, after stopping to fill up my diesel car with petrol, I took the next bend and a cyclist cut me off, then a biker thumped my car and a pedestrian ran out in front of me. I then drove into a pothole so now I have to get someone to recommend somewhere to buy part worn tyres that would suit a formula one car but on the price that's more suitable to wheelbarrow ownership. Luckily, I had some duct tape. And Plasti-dip. It's perfect now, so I'm thinking about selling it. How much do you think it's worth? Oh, the diesel. What should I do? A mechanic is so expensive, and they're all ripoff scumbags, aren't they? Yeah. Start the witch hunt. Eh, like I was saying, it's perfect. Should I tell the guy who's coming from Nigeria with a bank draft about the non-problem?

I got insured with INXS insurance but they're gone now, but I still have the disk in the window. The POlice asked me to bring it to the jail and produce my license. I was on my own but don't have a license but I did the theory test so will I be okay? What should I do? And, if a bear crashes a Mk II escort into a tree in Donegal, does anybody hear the sound? Eh, no...Eh, it wasn't me. It was my bear friend. What should I do? Oh, right. Yeah, good idea. I'll buy an avensis. Because they're awesome. I mean, for my friend. Yeah.

What about the tax though? Because I have one already. I forgot about it. It's a 6.7L twin turbo super-de-dooper one. With recaros. And it's mint. I got it when I was 12. Should I just use the oil I have in the garage, beside the lawnmower for it? I'm willing to take advice from any stranger on the internet who is able to pretend they know anything. You are my motoring gods.

I was thinking of changing it for a jeep. You know, so I can tow 6 horses. I was looking at a Suzyjuky and a Landcrusher. What's the best one? I have a budget of between 2 packets of tayto and up to around 5 cases of Dutch Gold. I can save my pocket money though. I was going to sell my BMX too, so take the time to give me serious advice. I promise to daydream after I've finished my homework.

BTW.. I need to respray my Wishy Washy Scooobaroo after I finish fitting the Bell Heli Turbine I got from a mate. How long is a piece of string?

On a serious note, are those sparkplugs you buy on the internet any good?

Consider yourself lucky that you don't have any Engine management light on the dash.

Truckermal

Is it a big job to change the breaks on my car, its a Toyota Aventis. .

colm_mcm

Truckermal wrote: »

Is it a big job to change the breaks on my car, its a Toyota Aventis. .

Have a go anyway. There'll be no stopping you.

tossy

colm_mcm wrote: »

Have a go anyway. There'll be no stopping you.

I'm addicted to brake fluid, it's ok though i can stop whenever i want!

Supergurrier

Questions being asked on a motoring forum. The horror.

I thought we were all just supposed to sit around looking cool.

You are alot more knowledgeable about cars then you are letting on OP and tbh AH would probably be more ripe for thanks whoring.

MetzgerMeister

I don't know what a tractor mortgage is :eek:

My face is melting, how do I superglue it back together without affecting my right to vote??

Supergurrier

MetzgerMeister wrote: »

I don't know what a tractor mortgage is :eek:

My face is melting, how do I superglue it back together without affecting my right to vote??

Tractor mortgage = Credit Union loan

BreadnBuddha

I had to avoid a mooosive potholio on the way to wurk this morning and then jammed on because of a learner driver with their HID foglights blinding me. My face hit the wheel and my tongue is now wedged firmly in my cheek. Can anyone suggest a PDR repair centre to fix it and how much will it cost?

MetzgerMeister

Painless Denture Removal?? :pac:

tossy

If a diesel car Cooooo's in the woods around Donegal and there is no one cool around to hear it, is it still 'felt?

Big Nasty

tossy wrote: »

If a diesel car Cooooo's in the woods around Donegal and there is no one cool around to hear it, is it still 'felt?

Brilliant!