Lack of empathy

Olive8585

Is it just me or are lots of people totally devoid of empathy these days?

Something awful happens to someone and instead of just saying 'poor them' or 'that's awful' people find ways to blame the victim and say they brought it on themselves.

Anyone else find this?

genericguy

Olive8585 wrote: »

Is it just me or are lots of people totally devoid of empathy these days?

Something awful happens to someone and instead of just saying 'poor them' or 'that's awful' people find ways to blame the victim and say they brought it on themselves.

Anyone else find this?

Example?

Olive8585

genericguy wrote: »

Example?

Colleague slipped on a piece of fruit someone had thrown on the floor in a supermarket and seriously injured her hip...freak accident that could have happened to anyone.

Cue the responses from colleagues 'oh she should have been more careful/looked where she was going'

As if they walk around looking at the floor on the off chance some pr1ck has dropped something dangerous there.

Sheldons Brain

More likely people have empathy for the perpetrator than the victim. " He had too much to drink" "She was only 18"

Wazdakka

Empathy is the capacity to recognise emotions that are being experienced by another sentient or fictional being.

Sympathy (from the Greek words syn "together" and pathos "feeling" which means "fellow-feeling") is the perception, understanding, and reaction to the distress or need of another human being..

I think that people are still plenty Empathetic...
They absolutely recognise the emotions that other people are going through.

But a lot of them just absolutely don't care...




:-(

Olive8585

Wazdakka wrote: »

Empathy is the capacity to recognise emotions that are being experienced by another sentient or fictional being.

Sympathy (from the Greek words syn "together" and pathos "feeling" which means "fellow-feeling") is the perception, understanding, and reaction to the distress or need of another human being..

I think that people are still plenty Empathetic...
They absolutely recognise the emotions that other people are going through.

But a lot of them just absolutely don't care...




:-(

I mean people lack empathy - they can't seem to identify or put themselves in the position of another person and think about how it would feel if it happened to them.

Princess Peach

I got an image of a woman comically slipping on a banana skin and laughed.

gugleguy

OP you posted on AH so expect AH type replies.

Olive8585

gugleguy wrote: »

OP you posted on AH so expect AH type replies.

Yeah that's fine, better than the shame of getting no replies.

Muise...

Olive8585 wrote: »

Colleague slipped on a piece of fruit someone had thrown on the floor in a supermarket and seriously injured her hip...freak accident that could have happened to anyone.

Cue the responses from colleagues 'oh she should have been more careful/looked where she was going'

As if they walk around looking at the floor on the off chance some pr1ck has dropped something dangerous there.

Maybe the crazy compensation cases people have won for such accidents have worn down the sympathy of others?

That, and some people actively seeking sympathy by constantly moaning on social media, when addressing their problem head on might be more effective (only then they couldn't moan any more).

Banjo String

Olive8585 wrote: »

Colleague slipped on a piece of fruit someone had thrown on the floor in a supermarket and seriously injured her hip ...freak accident that could have happened to anyone.

Cue the responses from colleagues 'oh she should have been more careful/looked where she was going'

As if they walk around looking at the floor on the off chance some pr1ck has dropped something dangerous there.

That's bananas, er I mean nuts.... Sorry..... Er.........


Mangoes. Blueberries. Peaches. Kiwi. Potatoes.

beks101

I think it's just an AH thing. 'Look how edgy I am not giving a sh1t about this big tragedy that everyone is talking about' etc

Saying that I find the hand-wringing bleeding heart crowd just as insufferable as the blame-the-victim brigade.

Muise...

Banjo String wrote: »

That's bananas, er I mean nuts.... Sorry..... Er.........


Mangoes.

A few rotten apples. Spoiling it for everyone, the bastards!

Banjo String

Muise... wrote: »

A few rotten apples. Spoiling it for everyone, the bastards!

Ah you pipped me to it.

ToddyDoody

Empathy can well be a P.R. stunt a lot of the time.

Boombastic

I think people are expected to feel sorry for idiots a lot of the time




It's not lacking empathy to point out it's their own fault

Muise...

Banjo String wrote: »

Ah you pipped me to it.

don't be getting sour grapes now.

pharmaton

Olive8585 wrote: »

I mean people lack empathy - they can't seem to identify or put themselves in the position of another person and think about how it would feel if it happened to them.

do you think maybe it wears off after a certain age? I remember being a very caring compassionate type when I was younger but I don't really have the energy to have feels for other people these days really. People often talk about it like its some kind of illness but in the greater scale of things it's probably more likely to just be part and parcel of life.

Banjo String

Muise... wrote: »

don't be getting sour grapes now.

I want to squeeze your melons.

Muise...

Banjo String wrote: »

I want to squeeze your melons.

You know you talk so sweet, you're twisting my melons man. :pac:

dodderangler

Olive8585 wrote: »

Yeah that's fine, better than the shame of getting no replies.

Well I certainly won't be replying now

mad muffin

There is no empathy through the lens.

Pwindedd

I find I can only empathise with people that are really close to me. I don't have enough in me to be getting all empathetic with every sob story I hear. It's not that I don't care it's just that I can't bring myself to get emotional about it. I will give you a ride if your car got robbed, or give you a tenner if your purse got stolen, make tea when your granny died. I'm a fixer not a feeler.

I also though don't expect people to empathise with me. I can't bear the sad face, furrowed brow reaction. Put the kettle on by all means, but don't hug me and make soothing noises.

Is empathy a dying emotion ? Probably - but I think that's changes in lifestyle. We don't all live in close knit communities anymore and social media means we have bad news overload - maybe we've become hardened to tragedy.

Lou.m

Olive8585 wrote: »

Is it just me or are lots of people totally devoid of empathy these days?

Something awful happens to someone and instead of just saying 'poor them' or 'that's awful' people find ways to blame the victim and say they brought it on themselves.

Anyone else find this?

I find the opposite. I find people are very sweet and sympathetic. I am always finding and meeting nice people. People are very sweet to me.

And I am always witnessing good turns.

pajor

Don't you know empathy is sign of weakness and even being "liberal!" :eek:

Not giving a sh*t about anyone or anything else is the cool thing now.

Vito Corleone

Empathy is faked 80% of the time, at least that's how I see it.

Shakespeare's Sister

beks101 wrote: »

I think it's just an AH thing. 'Look how edgy I am not giving a sh1t about this big tragedy that everyone is talking about' etc

And the following would be a variable of the above...

Vito Corleone wrote: »

Empathy is faked 80% of the time, at least that's how I see it.

How do you have the percentage, and how can you see something in such a way without actually knowing?

Vito Corleone

Magaggie wrote: »

How do you have the percentage, and how can you see something in such a way without actually knowing?

That's just the way I see it. Obviously no way to prove it, but then again there's no way to prove anybody's opinion on this subject.

SterlingArcher

Olive8585 wrote: »

Is it just me or are lots of people totally devoid of empathy these days?

Something awful happens to someone and instead of just saying 'poor them' or 'that's awful' people find ways to blame the victim and say they brought it on themselves.

Anyone else find this?

I would say there is a lot less community spirit. A lot less.. a lot more self centered ,.self serving , self entitlement.

The lack of empathy is only equaled in measure by the fake ass empty emotions, that flow forth from the "grief tourists" that mope about every disaster. rallying all the other urchins on social media sites.let's sit around our I phones pretending to give a rats.

Shakespeare's Sister

Vito Corleone wrote: »

That's just the way I see it. Obviously know way to prove it, but then again there's no way to prove anybody's opinion on this subject.

Weird and illogical!

But I do agree much of the social media grief-mongering seems insincere and sanctimonious.
Outside of social media settings though, between individuals, I cannot fathom how someone could decide "That's 80% fake".

If people lack empathy themselves, they shouldn't assume most other people are like them.

Stheno

Olive8585 wrote: »

Yeah that's fine, better than the shame of getting no replies.

I'm amazed no one has said they couldn't imagine how you'd feel

pharmaton

donegal__road wrote: »

There has been a dramatic increase over the last number of years, of autism spectrum disorders, including many adults who have recently been diagnosed as having forms of mild Asperger's syndrome without ever having realised it.

People with Asperger's are often characterized as lacking empathy.

I dont want to offend anyone who may have a family member with Aspergers, it just seems that it might be the answer to the OP's question.

y'know, this is just silly. There are a hundred reasons why people may not demonstrate emotion, it doesn't necessarily mean they lack them and by the same token it has nothing to do with autism, nor is it a disorder. I actually find heightened displays of emotion disturbing. Some people just deal with emotion differently. I find as I grow older I have greater respect for my emotional well being, how I deal with feelings, my own and others has become something of an art and at least I find it more satisfying this way.

The King of Moo

Pwindedd wrote: »

I will give you a ride if your car got robbed

I'm not sure that'd really help, but I'm up for it anyway.

I'm... not a feeler.

What kind of ride is that then?

Olive8585

Vito Corleone wrote: »

Empathy is faked 80% of the time, at least that's how I see it.

That's depressing. Not only do you not feel it, you can't believe that other people would.

Pwindedd

The King of Moo wrote: »

I'm not sure that'd really help, but I'm up for it anyway.



What kind of ride is that then?

Oh that tickled me :P

I'm not from round these parts - I sometimes forget that word has another meaning.

Lift, I'll give you a lift ? (That's not much better really is it)

I'll get you to your destination? (oh dear god stop now)

Ahh Sod it - I'll give you the bus fare and tell you where to get off.

Vito Corleone

Olive8585 wrote: »

That's depressing. Not only do you not feel it, you can't believe that other people would.

I have empathy when appropriate. From a practical point of view, however, empathy holds no advantages.

Muise...

Vito Corleone wrote: »

I have empathy when appropriate. From a practical point of view, however, empathy holds no advantages.

Plenty of advantages -such as a means of getting good information for emotional manipulation.

It's also part of the altruism that is necessary for the survival of the species, as opposed to the individual.

And it makes you look good.

pharmaton

Olive8585 wrote: »

That's depressing. Not only do you not feel it, you can't believe that other people would.

there are lots of different types of people in this world and lots of different ways of processing information, one is not better or less than the other. I don't know if you've come across the meyers briggs personality indicator, it might interest you to discover more about how you process data in comparison to how others do. It's a little Jungian psychology but it might give you some perspective.

Vito Corleone

Muise... wrote: »

And it makes you look good.

I feel this is why a lot of people feign empathy in certain circumstances.

Shakespeare's Sister

Vito Corleone wrote: »

From a practical point of view, however, empathy holds no advantages.

Weird again. To think of an involuntary (or sometimes voluntary) response in terms of what practical advantages it offers.
You look kinda edgy though.

Muise...

Vito Corleone wrote: »

I feel this is why a lot of people feign empathy in certain circumstances.

OMG! Vito just empathised!!! :pac:

Shakespeare's Sister

pharmaton wrote: »

there are lots of different types of people in this world and lots of different ways of processing information, one is not better or less than the other.

Having a specific view that might be completely incorrect seems more like a choice/confirmation bias than involuntary processing.

pharmaton

Magaggie wrote: »

Having a specific view that might be completely incorrect seems more like a choice/confirmation bias than involuntary processing.

I'm putting my hand on my heart here and honestly admitting I don't understand what that means

Shakespeare's Sister

pharmaton wrote: »

I'm putting my hand on my heart here and honestly admitting I don't understand what that means

To say "I think 80% [wtf?!] of empathy is not genuine" seems like something that has been *decided* (due to a particular bias) rather than it just being an involuntary, as you say, processing of information.

pragmatic1

I actually think people are less cunty than they were in the past.

pharmaton

Magaggie wrote: »

To say "I think 80% [wtf?!] of empathy is not genuine" seems like something that has been *decided* (due to a particular bias) rather than it just being an involuntary, as you say, processing of information.

ah ok. I thought you were implying that those who don't think the same as you are wrong.

Vito Corleone

Magaggie wrote: »

Weird again. To think of an involuntary (or sometimes voluntary) response in terms of what practical advantages it offers.
You look kinda edgy though.

I don't know why you are posting passive aggressive faces for. Just because someone has a different opinion to you doesn't mean they're edgy.

If I wanted to be edgy I'd go on Tumblr or something. I'm merely being honest.

Olive8585

pharmaton wrote: »

there are lots of different types of people in this world and lots of different ways of processing information, one is not better or less than the other. I don't know if you've come across the meyers briggs personality indicator, it might interest you to discover more about how you process data in comparison to how others do. It's a little Jungian psychology but it might give you some perspective.

I personally find a lack of empathy a very bad trait in a person.

pharmaton

Olive8585 wrote: »

I personally find a lack of empathy a very bad trait in a person.

I can understand why (especially in the example you gave in your op) however, not being able to express empathy is not a sign that some people don't have any. (victim blaming or laughing at anothers expense is a different kettle of fish, that's just being a dick)

Shakespeare's Sister

Vito Corleone wrote: »

Just because someone has a different opinion to you doesn't mean they're edgy.

I'd never think that about someone merely having a different opinion to me.

I'm talking about the opinion itself, which I was posting a counter-opinion to.

mcmoustache

Olive8585 wrote: »

Is it just me or are lots of people totally devoid of empathy these days?

Something awful happens to someone and instead of just saying 'poor them' or 'that's awful' people find ways to blame the victim and say they brought it on themselves.

Anyone else find this?

Try empathising with the poor socio-paths - instead of trying to turn AH against them as you are doing now.

I see what you're doing. A good person would try to understand why these people are the way they are. You're just judging them.