Maintenance question

helenannew

Hi there


I have an eight month old child from a one night stand. While I was pregnant the father left the country & went to Canada. He knew I was pregnant when he left. I couldn't put him on the birth cert as he needed to be here to do that.

He has recently returned & any efforts I've made to get him to meet his child has being in vain! He is under the impression I got pregnant on purpose, which I absolutely didn't.

He is leaving to go back to Canada in a few weeks leaving me no time to pursue him in the family courts for maintenance.

My question is, is there any way of pursuing him while in Canada? I'm struggling financially & could do with a little help. Any advise gratefully received.

maccydoodies

helenannew wrote: »

Hi there


I have an eight month old child from a one night stand. While I was pregnant the father left the country & went to Canada. He knew I was pregnant when he left. I couldn't put him on the birth cert as he needed to be here to do that.

He has recently returned & any efforts I've made to get him to meet his child has being in vain! He is under the impression I got pregnant on purpose, which I absolutely didn't.

He is leaving to go back to Canada in a few weeks leaving me no time to pursue him in the family courts for maintenance.

My question is, is there any way of pursuing him while in Canada? I'm struggling financially & could do with a little help. Any advise gratefully received.

You might think you dont have time as he is leaving the country again but you do. If he is served with a summons before leaving again he is obliged to attend court. If the judge decides that the service was made and he doesn't turn up the judge can make an order in his absence. That may be of no use to you now but in the future it will serve you well. Act tomorrow and get him served.

iwillhtfu

maccydoodies wrote: »

You might think you dont have time as he is leaving the country again but you do. If he is served with a summons before leaving again he is obliged to attend court. If the judge decides that the service was made and he doesn't turn up the judge can make an order in his absence. That may be of no use to you now but in the future it will serve you well. Act tomorrow and get him served.

Does op not have to actually prove paternity before any summons can be served? I'm not doubting you op but at the moment its your word against his and with such a short time frame I'd imagine you have limited options.

Also a court order for maintenance does not guarantee payment and judging by his attitude towards his child then I don't see him handing over any money.

It's a decision he'll more than likely live to regret. Get on to your welfare office and explain you situation you may not be claiming all your entitlements.

Good Luck.

maccydoodies

iwillhtfu wrote: »

Does op not have to actually prove paternity before any summons can be served? I'm not doubting you op but at the moment its your word against his and with such a short time frame I'd imagine you have limited options.

Also a court order for maintenance does not guarantee payment and judging by his attitude towards his child then I don't see him handing over any money.

It's a decision he'll more than likely live to regret. Get on to your welfare office and explain you situation you may not be claiming all your entitlements.

Good Luck.

If the father disputes paternity well then so be it. More than likely the maintenance hearing can be adjourned to allow for DNA testing.

iwillhtfu

I'd imagine he'll be on a flight before that appointment.

maccydoodies

iwillhtfu wrote: »

I'd imagine he'll be on a flight before that appointment.

If the DNA is court ordered and he doesn't partake he can be held for breach of a court order. Charming quality I love in a man. NOT

lifeandtimes

unfortunately if he does manage to leave before any of this is sorted nothing much will come of it unless he tries to enter the country again which may not happen

Iv never heard of a man being extradited from another country to here to attend trial for not paying maintenance.

Sounds like an absolute low life in my opinion and i despise people like that.

Op i feel for you and advise that you contact your local social welfare to make sure you are claiming everything that is entitled to you and your child, the system is there for people in your situation for a reason

superstepmom2b

op not doubting you but from what I have heard given you were not in.a relationship maintenance won't be granted without proof of paternity. You will need to get a dna test. If he is out of the country no idea what could happen. Perhaps contact the family court and query it?

ZENER

I can empathise with you OP - not directly mind. My daughter was in a similar situation, the fertiliser of her egg was a complete @$$hole, accused her of sleeping around and getting pregnant on purpose. He spread rumours about her and even complained to the gardai of harassment. The child is now almost 2 - there's no doubting he's the father.

She decided that she didn't want such a person to have any say in how her son should be reared. I respect her decision on that, he got his aunty to do all the talking for him. He's a wimp and not worthy to be called a father.

Maybe you're better off not having him involved ? Put him on the birth cert then he can get rights to custody and visitation if he applies for them - would you want that ? If you decide to emigrate he can stop you, prove paternity and he can use that against you.

Think carefully OP. I hope things work out for you and your baby.

Ken

maccydoodies

superstepmom2b wrote: »

op not doubting you but from what I have heard given you were not in.a relationship maintenance won't be granted without proof of paternity. You will need to get a dna test. If he is out of the country no idea what could happen. Perhaps contact the family court and query it?

Maintenance is awarded every day in the dc without the proof of a DNA test. If paternity is disputed well the judge may order a DNA test to be carried out.

It's preposterous to say that maintenance won't be granted with a DNA. Have you ever seen how many maintenance hearing are on in your local dc?

maccydoodies

ZENER wrote: »

Maybe you're better off not having him involved ? Put him on the birth cert then he can get rights to custody and visitation if he applies for them - would you want that ?

Ken

His name doesn't have to be on the birth cert for him to apply for access, guardianship or custody.

superstepmom2b

maccydoodies wrote: »

Maintenance is awarded every day in the dc without the proof of a DNA test. If paternity is disputed well the judge may order a DNA test to be carried out.

It's preposterous to say that maintenance won't be granted with a DNA. Have you ever seen how many maintenance hearing are on in your local dc?

I'm not in the habit of going to my local district court.

I made the point based on experience of a friend of mine. Maintenance was not granted as he disputed paternity and that there had been no relationship. He was requested to do a Dna test....... Not preposterous at all. That is fact. End of the day it also depends on the judge so there may be more cases where it is awarded then not. I was giving an example. She needs advice from a solicitor on the best course of action