Friend in work got fired, now I feel guilty

LegacyUser

Im with my employer about 18 months, am full time permanent. One of my friends started about 10 months through a temping agency and he recently got renewed on a 6 month contract ending in the summer.

We worked together on a team, just the two of us. I'm not a supervisor though the supervisors and managers give me more tasks and get me involved in other things.

Me and the lad were good friends, knew each other for years and we went to lunch together most days. We do the usual lad things of watching sport in the pub, went to England on weekends to Premier League games and played 5 a side soccer on Tuesday nights.

Recently the work got realy busy and I was pulling 12 hour days to get it done but I get overtime so that's fine, hungry for extra cash! :-)
My friend and teammate took some serious shortcuts such as hiding post in his locker and scanning it days later. That can delay payment to clients and management warned it was a disciplinary issue a few months ago. I told him all this but he did it anyway.

I had to call a meeting with my supervisor about the issues as I was getting hammered with blame and questions by other departments. Im not a supervisor but I am considered more senior so questions come to me and not a temp.

I told my supervisor about the post being stored in a locker and he monitored that for a few days and confirmed it. Then the supervisor told the senior supervisor who told our department manger and yesterday my friend was called to a meeting and let go. He is a temp so there was no written warnings, just gone immediately.

We had a quick chat, we said all the best and I texted the same and now on Saturday morning I feel I put a friend on the dole queue. I do not know if he's aware I was the one who escalated the issue, maybe he gueses but nothing was said. I do know he spent over a year on the dole in the past and he's back there again

Nobody else on my level knows he is gone, I was told to say nothing until an official email goes around next week.

Am I being hard on myself here? Have I screwed a friend over?

Tokyo

Why would you feel guilty?

You were pulling overtime to get the job done while your mate was hiding work in his locker at the expense of clients, and almost at the expense of you when management called you up on it. In short, your so-called friend was the worst kind of employee out there - sneaky, underhanded and lazy - and you gave him fair warning which was already more than he deserved. So the only person that put your friend on the dole was your friend. And considering that he'd spent a year on it already, he should have had a lot more respect for the job than that.

Consider the alternative - a situation arises next time where you CAN'T prove that you had no hand in taking shortcuts. You think your mate would be running up to take the blame and get you off the hook? I wouldn't count on it.... You're well rid as far as I can see...

Czarcasm

Friendgotthesack wrote: »

Am I being hard on myself here? Have I screwed a friend over?

OP I understand you liked the guy and ye got on great and everything else, I even understand why you didn't want to tell him that it was you who reported his carry on to management - because you valued, and still do value him as a friend.

Here's the kicker though - he didn't value you as a friend, so despite your continuously warning him, covering for his behaviour and keeping quiet at the expense of taking flak from management, your friend didn't appreciate any of this, and by you keeping quiet about the fact that it was you who went to management, your friend still hasn't learned and will never learn that he can't screw people over.

I wouldn't feel guilty or feel the need to justify myself to someone who knowingly put me in that position. That's not what friends do for each other! He could've lost YOU your job with his selfish behaviour, so I wouldn't go chasing after him if I were you, I'd chalk it down to experience and forget about him tbh.

You have nothing to feel guilty about, but plenty to feel proud about, that guy is his own worst enemy, but he'll never learn that if you feel the need to make excuses and take on the guilt for HIS behaviour. HE is the person should be feeling guilty, not you.

Stavro Mueller

I had to call a meeting with my supervisor about the issues as I was getting hammered with blame and questions by other departments. I'm not a supervisor but I am considered more senior so questions come to me and not a temp.

Because of your friend's behaviour, you were pushed straight into the firing line. If you had continued to protect him it could've blown up in your face. Even if you hadn't spoken up, there's a possibility that your employers might've found out in the end anyway and there'd be the same result for your friend.

IrishEyes19

You did the right thing, if you had kept it secret, you would have had a hand in the blame, where as you acted honestly and did the right thing. A reputation takes only minutes to lose, OP. Don't feel guilty.

Chucky the tree

Not sure you screwed him over, but you made no effort to cover for him. Some people will see no problem with that and say you don't have to cover for him, others would see it differently. End of the day you can't change what's happened to no point worrying about it.

Ham Sambo

@Chucky the tree - With respect, if you read his post you would have seen that he had told his mate that what he was doing was wrong, but his idiot mate did it anyway and was to blame for his own demise.

The attitude that you have towards work and for colleagues 'covering up' for other colleagues in the workplace is an unhealthy approach to life, perhaps you might review and amend the last post you made.

iCosmopolis

Nothing to feel guilty about. It's your career/livelihood at the end of the day. It would have been unethical & unprofessional to not have raised your concerns as you did. He was the one skiving, if he'd took your warning and done his job he wouldn't have found himself in this position.

LegacyUser

I would agree with the other posts here you have nothing to feel guilty about.

It was not your fault that his contact was ended. Your friend should have taken the advice you gave to him months ago.
He made no changes which led to you getting in trouble with your boss re work not been done. You had no choice but to to tell your boss about what was happening.
If your friend was to lazy to do his work or would not listen to advice from you it was only a matter of time before he was found out.

If you kept quite long term if could effect your progress in the company.

You have done nothing wrong here.

Toots

Don't feel guilty. You spoke to your friend about it and he still didn't change things. It would be one thing if you went running straight to management about it, but you didn't. You did the decent thing and spoke to your friend first, giving him a chance to pull his socks up. He didn't and now he needs to face the consequences. You didn't put him on the dole queue, he did it himself.

Alfasudcrazy

I agree with the others that you did nothing wrong and should not feel guilty but you have not clarified exactly why he was behaving like that - was it simply being lazy or was he unsure about what to do etc. I find many employee's act like that because they are unsure or not confident they are doing it right. Once they are given the information to do the job right they have no more problems.

meeeeh

Chucky the tree wrote: »

Not sure you screwed him over, but you made no effort to cover for him. Some people will see no problem with that and say you don't have to cover for him, others would see it differently. End of the day you can't change what's happened to no point worrying about it.

Would your argument be the same if you were one of the clients or employees of the client who didn't get paid because someone did not do their job.

Op, I understand why would you feel uneasy but that kind of behaviour could do a lot of damage to you, your employers and your clients. You did a right thing.

wasper

Friendgotthesack wrote: »

Im with my employer about 18 months, am full time permanent. One of my friends started about 10 months through a temping agency and he recently got renewed on a 6 month contract ending in the summer.

We worked together on a team, just the two of us. I'm not a supervisor though the supervisors and managers give me more tasks and get me involved in other things.

Me and the lad were good friends, knew each other for years and we went to lunch together most days. We do the usual lad things of watching sport in the pub, went to England on weekends to Premier League games and played 5 a side soccer on Tuesday nights.

Recently the work got realy busy and I was pulling 12 hour days to get it done but I get overtime so that's fine, hungry for extra cash! :-)
My friend and teammate took some serious shortcuts such as hiding post in his locker and scanning it days later. That can delay payment to clients and management warned it was a disciplinary issue a few months ago. I told him all this but he did it anyway.

I had to call a meeting with my supervisor about the issues as I was getting hammered with blame and questions by other departments. Im not a supervisor but I am considered more senior so questions come to me and not a temp.

I told my supervisor about the post being stored in a locker and he monitored that for a few days and confirmed it. Then the supervisor told the senior supervisor who told our department manger and yesterday my friend was called to a meeting and let go. He is a temp so there was no written warnings, just gone immediately.

We had a quick chat, we said all the best and I texted the same and now on Saturday morning I feel I put a friend on the dole queue. I do not know if he's aware I was the one who escalated the issue, maybe he gueses but nothing was said. I do know he spent over a year on the dole in the past and he's back there again

Nobody else on my level knows he is gone, I was told to say nothing until an official email goes around next week.

Am I being hard on myself here? Have I screwed a friend over?

Don't be, you warned hiom of the consequence of hiding invoices. He was idiotic & kept repeating the errors. Move on.

Chucky the tree

Ham Sambo wrote: »

@Chucky the tree - With respect, if you read his post you would have seen that he had told his mate that what he was doing was wrong, but his idiot mate did it anyway and was to blame for his own demise.

The attitude that you have towards work and for colleagues 'covering up' for other colleagues in the workplace is an unhealthy approach to life, perhaps you might review and amend the last post you made.

Yea but his post didn't say if the OP was getting blamed for it. If OP said that he was getting it trouble and asked his friend to cop on then I wouldn't feel that guilty, if he just mentioned it in passing it's a bit different.


I think the attitude you have to your friends is a bit unhealthy tbh. Glad I'm not one of yours.

meeeeh wrote: »

Would your argument be the same if you were one of the clients or employees of the client who didn't get paid because someone did not do their job.

Personally think you've got your priorities hugely wrongly if you care more about what your clients/employees than your friends.

Ham Sambo

Chucky, the guy screwed up, more than once, got every opportunity to sort himself out, it is idiots like him that are under some illusion that the world owes them something, Good God man, would you cop onto yourself. 0

mikemac1

Chucky the tree wrote: »

Yea but his post didn't say if the OP was getting blamed for it. If OP said that he was getting it trouble and asked his friend to cop on then I wouldn't feel that guilty, if he just mentioned it in passing it's a bit different.

It's a longish first post but the OP covered that Chucky. There were only two of them on the team. In those situations it's normal that all questions, blame and responsibility goes to the established employee and not the temp.

My friend and teammate took some serious shortcuts such as hiding post in his locker and scanning it days later. That can delay payment to clients and management warned it was a disciplinary issue a few months ago. I told him all this but he did it anyway.

I had to call a meeting with my supervisor about the issues as I was getting hammered with blame and questions by other departments. Im not a supervisor but I am considered more senior so questions come to me and not a temp.

Pretty clear there that the lad was given fair warning. Also the OP was pulling 12 hour days while his friend was taking shortcuts and the OP was getting questioned by other departments over delays.

If a lad can't scan post after 10 months on a job it's not lack of training, it's laziness tbh.