18 months and won't eat at home

The Magpie

Hi
Just wondering if any other parents have had a similar experience and how they solved it?
Our little fella is 18 months old. He's never been the best for eating dinners for us, but we usually got on grand with breakfast (wheatabix and warm milk/toast), lunch could be boiled or scrambled egg, and then various custard/rice co

I could never really get him to eat anything remotely resembling a dinner. He did eat stew for me for a while, but obviously got fed up of it, cos thats on the "no list" now too.

Now in creche, he eats everything. EVERYTHING!!! Curry, coddle, stew, chilli, beans and sausage...

These are all things I'd make at home, and I tried offer him all these things and whatever we're having ourselves, and at most he;ll nibble a bit of pasta, but more often than not he'll spit it out and clamp his mouth shut.

I'm torn between "ah sure he eats in creche so he's had a meal", and "why will he not eat normal food for me".

This has extended now to spitting out breakfast, yogurts, eggs, all the things he usually eats at home.
We're beyond frustrated and I'm fed up throwing out food. (the waste! says my inner Irish mammy).

He is only there til mid afternoon, and he won't eat anything proper from the time he comes home. He doesn't drink a whole lot either, maybe 4oz of water over the course of the afternoon, and then 5oz milk before bed, mostly cos I'm afraid he;ll wake up hungry.
Can anyone help?

addob

I hear you, although I had it the other way around, my boy ate fine at home but refused everything in the creche. That meant he had nothing from 7:30am to 5:00pm when he was home. We tried everything as well and it was all no go.

I spoke with the Dr at the time and he reassured us that one good meal a day (dinner in our case) was good enough and he wasn't loosing weight so he was getting enough. Is he now getting 2 with breakfast and lunch in the creche? It's possible that being around other children eating is encouraging him to eat?

You don't know what they're thinking sometimes... and it breaks you!

What happens on weekends when he doesn't go to creche does he not eat at all?

bp

There was a talk about this on Q102 last week and they were saying to make meal times a family occasion - so everyone sit down together to eat.

Also give them a small portion so it isn't too daunting.

My little one goes through these phases too but I have found by giving him the soon with food on it more gets eaten....yes the place is a state but they are eating and learning.

lazygal

If he's healthy I wouldn't make a fuss. I would offer very small portions of whatever the family meal is and leave it at that. I read that children can regress with eating between 18-21 months as a control and attention seeking thing, so the less fuss the better was the advice. Children also don't eat like we do - they eat when hungry and stop when full. Our child might have a day where she's eating non stop and looking for extras, followed by days where I don't know how she's still going because she's eaten like a bird. Overall she's healthy though. I also read that we should look at food intake over weeks and months rather than days in terms of child diet, because they go through so many little growth spurts and new experiences in the early years until three. I would definitely be letting a child that age feed themselves. We never did spoon-feeding but I notice children seem to prefer when they can control their eating with their own fork and spoon.

addob

I think bp's suggestion about making the meal an occasion is a good start as well. We find our troublesome eater is always better when we're eating together, so much so that we now all have dinner at 5:45-6:00pm if he's not happy about what he has he's sometimes more interested in what we're eating.

I also think watching us eat and eat different things makes things more appealing.

Keep trying, you'll find something that works!

The Magpie

Thanks for the replies, its reassuring to know I'm not the only one!
I suppose we've been doing most of whats being suggested.
He definitely has 2 meals (breakfast and dinner) and one snack in creche, so he's been well fed by the time he comes home.

At the weekend, he'll probably eat half a breakfast before messing and spitting. So that's half a meal.

He'll usually have most of a yogurt mid morning (the only thing I can really reliably get him to have), and after that, its pot luck.
I always feed him with the family in the evening, we eat at 5 to include him, his chair is pulled up alongside us and he gets what we're having.
I do find letting him pick directly off the tray or a plate with either hands or a spoon is more likely to encourage him to pick. But it is nly picking.
So its when I try to feed him and get him toe at a substantial amount to qualify as a meal that the messing starts.

I suppose looking at it, its not as terrible as I thought.
He eats something early in the day, but just doesn't eat much at the weekends cos his routine is scattered with us.

I suppose it will sort itself over time.

Can I ask what you would give your child in average day over the weekend/ outside of a creche routine and how it would vary to their usual meals?
Thanks!

addob

My kid is a pig on the days that he does eat so telling you what he eats now would discourage anyone who isn't sure if their kid is getting enough but remember I'm the parents of the kid who didn't eat for 11 weeks in the creche so there's hope!!

If you're out and about on the weekend keep snacks close by, also when my boy does get fussy we revert back to his very favorite Ella's Kitchen 10+ month meals, was there something that he ate enthusiastically that you could take a step back to?

And you mentioned in your original post that he doesn't get a lot of milk but remember that the yogurt counts as dairy!

bp

It vary a widely in our house - pretty much refused all food in crèche yesterday and at home but other days when I get to creche I am told that he ate extra so as long as he gets something I am usually happy out.

Little tummy sand teething have effects

theLuggage

The Magpie wrote: »

I do find letting him pick directly off the tray or a plate with either hands or a spoon is more likely to encourage him to pick. But it is nly picking.
So its when I try to feed him and get him toe at a substantial amount to qualify as a meal that the messing starts.

Let him eat his own food, either finger food or use his own spoon. You say the messing starts when you get involved so try to leave him to his own devices. It can be hard to watch all the mess :eek: but it might be worth a try.

I'd say it's more a control issue, especially if he's fine in creche. Don't make meals a battle. If he doesn't eat, he doesn't eat. You can always pop on toast or whatever later if he's hungry. I know it feels terrible thinking they are hungry but if he's hungry, he will eat!

If he doesn't get a reaction from you, he'll stop messing. Try only interacting by praising him when he does eat. When the messing starts say "All gone?" a few times and remove the food. If he cries bring it back but if he doesn't than maybe he is done.