when is the best time for a new pup?

monflat

Hi all
I need advice from those of you who are parents.

Ive always had dogs mostly labs/retrievers
Our beloved retriever was 14 last yr and he had to be pts.

I have two small children 3.5 1.5 and am 4 months pregnant on the third.

My dilema in regards to the children is now a right time to get a new addition to the family?
Youngest is walking steadily and is more or less off the floor she adores the two cats and has to feeed them morning and evening.

If we got a new pup now he would be old enough to be house trained by the tine the new baby is crawling
Or do we wait till the new baby is walkin which will be 2 yrs down the road and the oldest will be 6??

I work a few days a week but my childminder or husband will be here.
There will be always someone in house.

We have set up here enclosed garden etc .

So basically is the time right now? Or wait till the third child is walking ?
However i dont want my other two to loose out either.


I was thinking of a cocker spaniel . Something small as the labs would be too big as they still small.

Any advice appreciated

Jen Pigs Fly

I would personally wait until the kids are older kids tend to not understand boundaries with dogs which can lead to dogs being tormented.

My parents were big dog lovers, they got a dog when I was 5 and my sister was 2, told me to never get a dog with such young kids (we got a boarder collie) unfortunately penny was taken on us after 2 years. We then got Scoobie when I was 12 and my sister was 9, We still have her and it was much better as we contributed to teaching her tricks and knew not to jump on her, pull ears, tails, etc and to respect that she's an animal who may like boundaries and a bit of peace and quiet. Scoobie is a lab x.

I would recommend you wait until the kids are older. Don't want the pup to be tormented so much that it may snap or knock a small child over which will leave you in an awkward position where dog and kids will be walking on eggshells.

I would wait, kids are way too young. They won't understand why they can't pull at the dog and poke and prod it, it might be seen more as a toy over an animal with boundaries.


A bit horrible, but I'll tell you anyway. My sister was two when we had penny ... My mam kept finding her very interested in the collies leavings let's say ... Came down to a 9 week old collies excrement smeared all over the walls (and herself and the dog), dog was being toilet trained using mats and didn't get down in time, my sister snuck in past the baby gate and went to town .... So yes kids arnt a god idea really with pups hahaa

SingItOut

There was always dogs from the time I was born in our house and never any problems because I was taught how to behave around them and was always supervised so neither I or the dogs got out of hand. Personally I'd wait until after the new baby is born and you get your strength back so that the new puppy can benefit from exercise and the two older kids can join in etc

I've never owned a cocker spaniel so I can't really comment on their behaviour personally.

monflat

xxxJennyxxx wrote: »

I would personally wait until the kids are older kids tend to not understand boundaries with dogs which can lead to dogs being tormented.

My parents were big dog lovers, they got a dog when I was 5 and my sister was 2, told me to never get a dog with such young kids (we got a boarder collie) unfortunately penny was taken on us after 2 years. We then got Scoobie when I was 12 and my sister was 9, We still have her and it was much better as we contributed to teaching her tricks and knew not to jump on her, pull ears, tails, etc and to respect that she's an animal who may like boundaries and a bit of peace and quiet. Scoobie is a lab x.

I would recommend you wait until the kids are older. Don't want the pup to be tormented so much that it may snap or knock a small child over which will leave you in an awkward position where dog and kids will be walking on eggshells.

I would wait, kids are way too young. They won't understand why they can't pull at the dog and poke and prod it, it might be seen more as a toy over an animal with boundaries.


A bit horrible, but I'll tell you anyway. My sister was two when we had penny ... My mam kept finding her very interested in the collies leavings let's say ... Came down to a 9 week old collies excrement smeared all over the walls (and herself and the dog), dog was being toilet trained using mats and didn't get down in time, my sister snuck in past the baby gate and went to town .... So yes kids arnt a god idea really with pups hahaa

Thats great thank you
Ive always been around animals you see so i want to give my children the oppertunities too.
Lots of photos of me at home from a baby with the dogs etc

My two however are not on the rough side at all are extremely quiet and are sensitive.
However i do understand its not fair on an animal if small people are pulling and pokin it.

monflat

SingItOut wrote: »

There was always dogs from the time I was born in our house and never any problems because I was taught how to behave around them and was always supervised so neither I or the dogs got out of hand. Personally I'd wait until after the new baby is born and you get your strength back so that the new puppy can benefit from exercise and the two older kids can join in etc

I've never owned a cocker spaniel so I can't really comment on their behaviour personally.

Thank you for that.
Im not goin to rush into anything im only lookin for peoples opinions as there are too many dogs looking for homes. Etc


I suppose another reason to think of getting one before the baby is born is that it hopefully would be progressing with toilet training
Etc

cocker5

Personally I would wait until your third child is 2/3 (at least).. for many reasons really.

1.You’re going to be very busy with two kids and a baby throwing a puppy (an animal baby) into the mix can lead to massive amount of added stress IMO. TBH having a puppy and a new born baby and other young children to me shouts stress.

2.Young children / babies even if well behaved can hurt a dog, or don’t know how to behave around puppies / dogs, so when they are older and have a better understanding of the rules this will help avoid any unnecessary snapping / biting from a puppy. Then the puppy can learn how to behave with kids also, instead of trying to teach young children, babies and a puppy all at the same time. Puppies do a lot of play biting for the first few months, young kids / babies won’t understand this and it may upset them and make them afraid.

3.As you already know dogs take a lot of time and energy and puppies waaaaaaay more. It’s not just toilet training, its general training , exercise etc will you have the time at this stage of your life? whereas when your kids are older they can part take in the training and help with the walking etc.

4.I seen kids get “bored” of dogs once they grow out of the puppy stage and it doesn’t end well for the dogs, so maybe if the kids had to wait a few years and then REALLY wanted a dog then it would be a family decision and not you getting one because you think your kids would benefit / want one – hope that makes sense. It would be the whole family on board, whereas at the moment your kids are too young to make that decision etc.

On the cocker spaniel , as my name suggests I have a male black cocker, he is the most amazing dog, extremely gentle, very lovable loyal, but needs a lot of exercise, which is grand for me as I have the time. He was introduced to kids from a very early age (like 10 weeks and also with the breeder before etc), also their coat needs a lot of clipping / grooming etc, they are indoor dogs who all they want day and night is to be with their humans, they are very social and happy dogs , also he was a head case of a puppy for about 15 months or so….– not trying to put you off at all just wanted to let you know. With all that said I wouldn’t part with him for the world.

Also consider the costs of a dog, decent food, vet bills, medical insurance, training classes, grooming and kennels if you go away etc.

Best of luck with your decision

sorry just wanted to point out your kids wont loose out at all by gettinga dog a little later, infact they will probably love it even more as part of the family and they will benefit from having a dog at any age, they dont have to be so young...

monflat

cocker5 wrote: »

Personally I would wait until your third child is 2/3 (at least).. for many reasons really.

1.You’re going to be very busy with two kids and a baby throwing a puppy (an animal baby) into the mix can lead to massive amount of added stress IMO. TBH having a puppy and a new born baby and other young children to me shouts stress.

2.Young children / babies even if well behaved can hurt a dog, or don’t know how to behave around puppies / dogs, so when they are older and have a better understanding of the rules this will help avoid any unnecessary snapping / biting from a puppy. Then the puppy can learn how to behave with kids also, instead of trying to teach young children, babies and a puppy all at the same time. Puppies do a lot of play biting for the first few months, young kids / babies won’t understand this and it may upset them and make them afraid.

3.As you already know dogs take a lot of time and energy and puppies waaaaaaay more. It’s not just toilet training, its general training , exercise etc will you have the time at this stage of your life? whereas when your kids are older they can part take in the training and help with the walking etc.

4.I seen kids get “bored” of dogs once they grow out of the puppy stage and it doesn’t end well for the dogs, so maybe if the kids had to wait a few years and then REALLY wanted a dog then it would be a family decision and not you getting one because you think your kids would benefit / want one – hope that makes sense. It would be the whole family on board, whereas at the moment your kids are too young to make that decision etc.

On the cocker spaniel , as my name suggests I have a male black cocker, he is the most amazing dog, extremely gentle, very lovable loyal, but needs a lot of exercise, which is grand for me as I have the time. He was introduced to kids from a very early age (like 10 weeks and also with the breeder before etc), also their coat needs a lot of clipping / grooming etc, they are indoor dogs who all they want day and night is to be with their humans, they are very social and happy dogs , also he was a head case of a puppy for about 15 months or so….– not trying to put you off at all just wanted to let you know. With all that said I wouldn’t part with him for the world.

Also consider the costs of a dog, decent food, vet bills, medical insurance, training classes, grooming and kennels if you go away etc.

Best of luck with your decision

Thanks for taking the time to reply.
As i.posted here i was looking for answers that would take everythin into acount.

I will wait now for another while
I suppose missing an animals conpany over last while.


Dilema solved i will wait !!.

cocker5

monflat wrote: »

Thanks for taking the time to reply.
As i.posted here i was looking for answers that would take everythin into acount.

I will wait now for another while
I suppose missing an animals conpany over last while.


Dilema solved i will wait !!.

Ahh i know what you mean, dogs are amazing and when you get one your kids will def benefit as you you BUT my advice would be make 100% sure firstly you have the time , patience, perserverence and with the kids help the whole family can help the puppy grow.... its just my opinion is when they are all so young a crazy pupp in the mix will cause massive stress thats all.

just to note my sisters kids have ALWAYS wanted a dog... as did she and her husband... but she has 4 (11,8,7,4) and the extra cost and stress in her opinion woild have been too much. and she even admits herself the dog / puppy may have had to spend time alone in the garden (much to my despair) with all the havoc BUT now things have calmed dow things are alot different. She did really consider getting one every year for the past 5 years, but now she admits this year is the right time for her family and the new dog. shes glad she waited thats all

Now that the kids are alot older they are all making the decision to get a dog.... the kids are fighting over who going to get to walk the dog etc

Thats all....

monflat

cocker5 wrote: »

Ahh i know what you mean, dogs are amazing and when you get one your kids will def benefit as you you BUT my advice would be make 100% sure firstly you have the time , patience, perserverence and with the kids help the whole family can help the puppy grow.... its just my opinion is when they are all so young a crazy pupp in the mix will cause massive stress thats all.

just to note my sisters kids have ALWAYS wanted a dog... as did she and her husband... but she has 4 (11,8,7,4) and the extra cost and stress in her opinion woild have been too much. and she even admits herself the dog / puppy may have had to spend time alone in the garden (much to my despair) with all the havoc BUT now things have calmed dow things are alot different. She did really consider getting one every year for the past 5 years, but now she admits this year is the right time for her family and the new dog. shes glad she waited thats all

Now that the kids are alot older they are all making the decision to get a dog.... the kids are fighting over who going to get to walk the dog etc

Thats all....

Thanks i know i have tobe sensible about it. Iknow the two girls now might b fine and gentle but the thiird could be a terror.

I would always be the csutious sort and weight up the possibities etc
But i would hateto get something and it not to work out.

There are too many adds of dogs of all sorts free to good home because of the "owners circumstances".
I would not like to get into a suitation like thst
I have to be 110% sure !!!!

DBB

I'll just add a little bit more, if I may!
I would also urge you to wait OP, I think most kids get a LOT more out of a dog once they reach 5-6+ years of age, and I have seen far too many younger kids become terrified of dogs when the parents introduced a bitey, chasey, nippy puppy that the kids felt they could not control.
You would have two new babies in the house, one of them very mobile and with very sharp teeth! Getting a new puppy can be pretty overwhelming. Having a new baby can be pretty overwhelming. Put the two together and you're in trouble!
Having said that, there are some Wonderparents out there who seem to be able to manage anything and everything, but I do feel they bring a lot of hardship on themselves when waiting a wee while would lighten the load in a big way.
One other thing, and I don;t want to insult the Cocker owners here , but I do a lot of work with dogs with behavioural problems. I'm afraid that Cockers feature right up at the top of the list of breeds that are likely to show aggression towards their owners: specifically, they have a marked tendency to resource guard things like food, toys, chews etc. Whilst it can usually be reasonably well managed in an adult home, resource guarding is a bloody nightmare, and dangerous, when there are kids living in the home. So if it has to be a Cocker, be very, very careful where you get it from, and make absolutely certain you source a breeder who has small children themselves, who raises the pups inside their home (or at the very least, lets the pups spend a significant portion of their day inside the house), who handles the pups several times every day from birth, who does not feed all of the pups from the same dish, rather they feed each pup in separate bowls and supervises mealtimes, and who has exposed their pups to several new experiences every day from the age of 3-4 weeks.
Do not choose the pup that races up to you first, and do not choose the one that sits at the back and won't come to you readily... you want one of the pups in between!
I think you're being really sensible by holding off for a while, I really do feel you'll all get a lot more out of it, and enjoy it more, if the kids are a bit older and ready for another new family member.
I know very little about smallie animals as pets, but perhaps the older kids could get a small pet now which might help "fill the gap", if the pet itself is appropriate for kids of their age? It could really help the kids get a feel for what it's like being responsible for another little life, and get them into a care routine. That's not to say that the small pet would be just a stop-gap, it should of course be cherished and loved as any dog would, but an easier and more realistic prospect at this point in time, perhaps?

monflat

DBB wrote: »

I'll just add a little bit more, if I may!
I would also urge you to wait OP, I think most kids get a LOT more out of a dog once they reach 5-6+ years of age, and I have seen far too many younger kids become terrified of dogs when the parents introduced a bitey, chasey, nippy puppy that the kids felt they could not control.
You would have two new babies in the house, one of them very mobile and with very sharp teeth! Getting a new puppy can be pretty overwhelming. Having a new baby can be pretty overwhelming. Put the two together and you're in trouble!
Having said that, there are some Wonderparents out there who seem to be able to manage anything and everything, but I do feel they bring a lot of hardship on themselves when waiting a wee while would lighten the load in a big way.
One other thing, and I don;t want to insult the Cocker owners here , but I do a lot of work with dogs with behavioural problems. I'm afraid that Cockers feature right up at the top of the list of breeds that are likely to show aggression towards their owners: specifically, they have a marked tendency to resource guard things like food, toys, chews etc. Whilst it can usually be reasonably well managed in an adult home, resource guarding is a bloody nightmare, and dangerous, when there are kids living in the home. So if it has to be a Cocker, be very, very careful where you get it from, and make absolutely certain you source a breeder who has small children themselves, who raises the pups inside their home (or at the very least, lets the pups spend a significant portion of their day inside the house), who handles the pups several times every day from birth, who does not feed all of the pups from the same dish, rather they feed each pup in separate bowls and supervises mealtimes, and who has exposed their pups to several new experiences every day from the age of 3-4 weeks.
Do not choose the pup that races up to you first, and do not choose the one that sits at the back and won't come to you readily... you want one of the pups in between!
I think you're being really sensible by holding off for a while, I really do feel you'll all get a lot more out of it, and enjoy it more, if the kids are a bit older and ready for another new family member.
I know very little about smallie animals as pets, but perhaps the older kids could get a small pet now which might help "fill the gap", if the pet itself is appropriate for kids of their age? It could really help the kids get a feel for what it's like being responsible for another little life, and get them into a care routine. That's not to say that the small pet would be just a stop-gap, it should of course be cherished and loved as any dog would, but an easier and more realistic prospect at this point in time, perhaps?

Yes i definitly dont want them.to get a fright at all and yes by waiting a while at least they may pester and pester me and they may really want one then rather than now i want it more than themand myself will be the sole carer for the while.
So il have enough on my hands and i dont want to add to the stress.

I suppose i had visions of the older 2 not being around dogs and maybe grow a big fear of them

However no rash decisions will be made.
I suppose i always thought the labs were slow to mature and are big dogs to have around.

I suppose 2 people i know have cockers & children and they reccommend them.
I know there are many breeds around but yes i would be threading very carefully as regarding whom where i get it from.

Knine

I'm gonna agree with DBB. I have experience with Cockers & they would not be my ideal choice for young kids.

Our Cocker was not particularly good with smaller children. She tolerated them but certainly preferred not to interact too much.

Dogs can be a lot of work, or they can be easy. Odds are though, when combined with dependent kids the work for all involved is multiplied. I'd give it til you're settled a bit after No. 3 before bring a dog into the equation.

aonb

OP I agree with everything the others have said about waiting.
I know exactly how you feel though about missing having a dog around. But you have the cats, so that will help until you are organised with baby #3.
Would you consider a grown/adult dog when you are ready to introduce a dog to your family.
There would be the advantage that little children wont torment a cute puppy and the potential behaviour issues associated with that, IF you could find the right grown dog. There are rescues that foster their dogs, so they could tell you whether a potential dog is good with children or not.

My daughter was 3.5 when I got our first terrier puppy. We are very 'dog people' and my daughter has always been animal-mad, but it was a constant battle to let the poor puppy have child-free time for the first few months!