IF......

catallus

"If you farted while riding a bicycle, how much faster would you go?"

I saw this being asked elsewhere online today and it made me laugh out loud.

My first thought was "What kind of mind asks such a question?"

But then it hit me, by god, the genius of it! The scientific and philosophical avenues to be explored through the consideration of the intricacies of dropping one while on a bike are many and wonderful!

So, have you any other examples of seemingly stupid questions which, after mature consideration, have given you the chance to truly live the life of a pioneer of the possible?

MadsL

What's the answer?

Captain Chaos

If you sneezed while on the same said bike, how much would you slow down by?

Then if you sneezed and farted at the same time would the two opposing forces cancel each other out??

anncoates

We used to lift our legs up and fart on our bikes in very much the same way you suggest.

We were about 8 at the time.

Banjo String

If a tree falls in forest and there are no women around.


Does the place look a mess?

tim3000

If you were to drop a 1kg water-balloon from a great height and it hit someone would it kill them?

D1stant

Captain Chaos wrote: »

If you sneezed while on the same said bike, how much would you slow down by?

Then if you sneezed and farted at the same time would the two opposing forces cancel each other out??

Indeed. If you did both in a curled up position would you in fact levitate. Is this how ET did it?

The Backwards Man

tim3000 wrote: »

If you were to drop a 1kg water-balloon from a great height and it hit someone would it kill them?

Depends how you define 'great'. Two feet would be a great height for the person you hit, two thousand feet not so much.

893bet

Captain Chaos wrote: »

If you sneezed while on the same said bike, how much would you slow down by?

Then if you sneezed and farted at the same time would the two opposing forces cancel each other out??

Possibily but more likely that you would **** yourself.

tim3000

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Depends how you define 'great'. Two feet would be a great height for the person you hit, two thousand feet not so much.

Well enough of a height for it to reach terminal velocity, 200-300 feet or so at a guess.

MadsL

If you travelled in a car at the speed of light, would your headlights be effective?

fathead82

If you stand still & fart,you dont move,so I doubt it would make you go any faster on a bike.
I was thinking the other day,do birds have faces? or is it just a head with eyes & a beak.

Captain Chaos

fathead82 wrote: »

If you stand still & fart,you dont move,so I doubt it would make you go any faster on a bike.
I was thinking the other day,do birds have faces? or is it just a head with eyes & a beak.

You don't move because it can't move your weight but you do resist the force naturally by gravity. If you farted in zero G it would move you ever so slightly. For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.

uch

I can Piss while I'm waking and it doesn't slow me down

MadsL

uch wrote: »

I can Piss while I'm waking and it doesn't slow me down

Do you get out of bed first?

uch

MadsL wrote: »

Do you get out of bed first?

Eh... No, and I can piss while I'm walking too

Archeron

If you fart in a lift and then leave, is the lift heavier than if you hadnt farted in it?

jamo2oo9

What if when we die, that light at the end of the tunnel is the opening of another vagina...?

Captain Chaos

jamo2oo9 wrote: »

What if when we die, that light at the end of the tunnel is the opening of another vagina...?

Oh no, not going through all that again. Once was enough.

jamo2oo9

Captain Chaos wrote: »

Oh no, not going through all that again. Once was enough.

But think about it though.. It's basically dying and then suddenly, you are a baby

uch

jamo2oo9 wrote: »

But think about it though.. It's basically dying and then suddenly, you are a baby

And you remember squat

Annasopra

If you asked a stupid question would you get a stupid answer?

somefeen

mango salsa wrote: »

If you asked a stupid question would you get a stupid answer?

Flip-flops

uch

somefeen wrote: »

Flip-flops

that's neither a question nor an answer, you fartknocker!

Sam Kade

catallus wrote: »

"If you farted while riding a bicycle, how much faster would you go?"

I saw this being asked elsewhere online today and it made me laugh out loud.

My first thought was "What kind of mind asks such a question?"

But then it hit me, by god, the genius of it! The scientific and philosophical avenues to be explored through the consideration of the intricacies of dropping one while on a bike are many and wonderful!

So, have you any other examples of seemingly stupid questions which, after mature consideration, have given you the chance to truly live the life of a pioneer of the possible?

Well there's a trial for you tomorrow, have a good feed of beans get on you bike and come back and let us know the result

Sir Arthur Daley

If you close your eyes does it almost feel like nothing changed at all?

phill106

If you were in a ship going faster then the speed of light, would you see yourself if you looked behind you?

Sir Arthur Daley

phill106 wrote: »

If you were in a ship going faster then the speed of light, would you see yourself if you looked behind you?

The G force would kill you

PizzamanIRL

If you sell your soul to the devil, do you get a receipt?

catallus

I think fartknocker shall be my word of the day

kingcobra

tim3000 wrote: »

If you were to drop a 1kg water-balloon from a great height and it hit someone would it kill them?

But would it be possible for the air resistance forcing up on the balloon cause it to cave in on itself and burst before it hits the ground?

Lawrence1895

If the dog hadn't shat, he would have caught the rabbit...as we say in Germany

Huell

What time is it on the sun?

Cee-Jay-Cee

If you were travelling faster than the speed of light and travelling back through time and you farted, would it smell?

stefan idiot jones

Has a fart got lumps?

sawdoubters

What kind of mind posts such a question?"

stefan idiot jones

Because I think I've sh!t myself!!!!

MonaPizza

When you fart do you actually gain weight? After all you are expelling warm gas which is naturally buoyant.

lau1247

uch wrote: »

I can Piss while I'm waking and it doesn't slow me down

I hope you are walking sideways or backward while doing so :eek: otherwise it is just a mess

Arthur Beesley

What if you sharted?

Badly Drunk Boy

fathead82 wrote: »

If you stand still & fart,you dont move,so I doubt it would make you go any faster on a bike.

It'd make other move away quicker, though.

bnt

MonaPizza wrote: »

When you fart do you actually gain weight? After all you are expelling warm gas which is naturally buoyant.

Whether a particular gas is buoyant or not depends on its density - and when it's inside you, it's compressed and therefore denser than air. So: no, having gas inside you doesn't make you lighter.

I thought about doing some seat-of-the-pants calculations on the OP's question, but I can't be ... arsed. :cool: