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fell out with close friend now feel like a loner

  • 25-12-2013 1:41pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    ok so i was really close to this guy best friends you could say, we talked everyday a couple of times a day, and went to the cinema out for drinks at leat 3 to 4 times a month, at times it felt like he was the only friend i had, i have other friends but only ones that i head out with on a night out and i wouldnt call them best friends, i told him something and told him not to tell anyone and he told lots people i was so angry so i stopped talking to him, he has now deleted me from facebook even tho he was in the wrong and i doubt we will talk again, now i feel so lonely i miss having a close friend to talk to , and have no one to go to the cinema or for meals etc with


Comments

  • #2
    stickybookmark
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,186 ✭✭✭stickybookmark


    Christmasgrinch wrote: »
    ok so i was really close to this guy best friends you could say, we talked everyday a couple of times a day, and went to the cinema out for drinks at leat 3 to 4 times a month, at times it felt like he was the only friend i had, i have other friends but only ones that i head out with on a night out and i wouldnt call them best friends, i told him something and told him not to tell anyone and he told lots people i was so angry so i stopped talking to him, he has now deleted me from facebook even tho he was in the wrong and i doubt we will talk again, now i feel so lonely i miss having a close friend to talk to , and have no one to go to the cinema or for meals etc with

    Op are you male or female?


  • #3
    CBX
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 56 ✭✭CBX


    My advice would be to talk to him about it. If you were best friends as you say it shouldn't be too hard to sort things out between you. Just say you want to be friends again and apologise (I know you probably don't feel you've anything to apologise for but I feel it would help) and I'm sure he will apologise too and you can be friends again.


  • #4
    MagicMarker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    CBX wrote: »
    My advice would be to talk to him about it. If you were best friends as you say it shouldn't be too hard to sort things out between you. Just say you want to be friends again and apologise (I know you probably don't feel you've anything to apologise for but I feel it would help) and I'm sure he will apologise too and you can be friends again.

    What is the OP apologising for exactly?

    OP, I think you've learned in this case how good a friend this person really is. I say move on and don't lose much sleep over it.


  • #5
    CBX
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 56 ✭✭CBX


    MagicMarker wrote: »
    What is the OP apologising for exactly?

    OP, I think you've learned in this case how good a friend this person really is. I say move on and don't lose much sleep over it.

    I'm not saying they have anything to apologise for. But perhaps it is necessary for the OP to apologise in order to rekindle the friendship. Perhaps not.

    OP texts friend saying they want to be friends again and apologies for not talking to him for ages. Friend agrees and apologies for breaking their trust. Friends again.


  • #6
    Mozzeltoff
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,614 ✭✭✭Mozzeltoff


    OP I had a lot of friends like this down through the years and one by one I just dropped them. I was foolish enough to tell them something personal and low and behold half the town knows by evening! I know another poster here has said apologize to them and they'll apologize back. I have done that. I have swallowed my pride and apologized for getting mad and they would apologize for spreading gossip and bitching behind my back and we would be back best buddies again. Only two weeks down the line they would take something I said out of context and spread their mangled version of what I said around like butter or make my business public knowledge again.

    Honestly OP I have been in your shoes and I say you're better off feeling lonely then having someone like that in your life. Constantly making yourself feel bad for your reaction to their bad attitude, that's not good for your mind at all. I know you feel bad now but it will pass. Get to know the other people you hang around with and see what friendships blossom from there.


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  • #7
    thefeatheredcat
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,282 ✭✭✭thefeatheredcat


    Are you missing the person, or are you missing what you experienced with that person?

    OP if you're missing what you have experienced with that person, then you should broaden your horizons in friendships and make new friends, and get to know the friends you have that bit better and share new experiences with them and maybe in time, you'll have something beyond going out for a few drinks with in one of them.

    If you're missing that particular person, their personality and all the things that makes them, them, rather than what you have experienced with them such as cinema, drinks then maybe you should consider making a move in making amends with them.


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